Second installment of Shenanigans at Holitsuba High (really, that should have been the title I gave it). Still not safe for work, but marginally more serious now!

Rating: Hard R.
Pairing: Kurogane x Yuui, Kurogane x Fai, hints of numerous other pairings.
Notes: Merry Christmas, Shacha! Love, Santa.
Warnings: this fic contains mentions of incest and Seishirou being a disturbing creeper (well, when is he not).

Leave my thoughts behind

Soon i'll have the courage
To leave my thoughts behind
I'll give back all the knowledge
And keep the wisdom precious in my mind
-Massive Attack, 'Three'

He's back in his office after hours again, grading the last paper of the lot, when the window unceremoniously slides open and he wearily looks up. This time the moron who vaults over the windowsill wears a white lab coat, messy blond hair, and a smile that could eclipse the sun.

"It's you," he says, tired.

"It's me," Fai agrees cheerfully.

Kurogane slides open one of his desk drawers and pulls out a bar of chocolate he'd confiscated from one of his students, tossing it absently across the room. Fai catches it perfectly and turns it over in his hands, his whole face lighting up as he realizes what it is.

"A Kit-Kat bar? Oh, Kuro-sama-sensei spoils me," he trills.

"I am trying to work here," Kurogane growls.

Fai pouts at him, advancing on the desk; Kurogane cradles his forehead in his hand and bends his head to the essay. "Why didn't Kuro-lazy do his work during his free period like he normally does?"

"I was busy," Kurogane says.

"Doing what?"

"That witch wanted me to take your brother to the other moron in this school who wears a lab coat."

Fai climbs onto the edge of the desk and proceeds to unwrap the chocolate bar loudly, casually dropping the paper packaging on top of the stack of essays Kurogane has already graded. "How was Yuui?"

"Fine."

"Kuro-surly..."

"Fine, okay? Fuck's sake."

There's a little crunch as Fai carefully snaps off one of the bars and bites into it hard, and then says, around a mouthful of Kit-Kat, "Did Kuro-sama see his tattoo?"

Kurogane doesn't say anything, but he rather thinks the sudden rush of heat to his face might give him away. He bends studiously over the paper.

"Kuro-red does know that the back of his neck blushes when he does," Fai comments.

"Yes!" Kurogane snaps, glaring at the blond (his blond?). "Yes, I saw it. What do you want from me?"

"Well," Fai says, "It's been a long day, and I would really like Kuro-cranky to fuck me." Kurogane sputters; Fai breaks off another piece of confiscated chocolate. "But he's busy, so I want to make small talk to keep from being bored until he's not busy."

"Idiot," Kurogane growls.

"Of course," Fai replies, unconcerned, and crunch crunch crunch the Kit-Kat is gone. "Does Kuro-slow like Yuui?"

"He's fine. Less stupid than you," Kurogane says, but there's something off to the way he cuts his gaze away, his hesitance to meet blue eyes... Fai licks chocolate residue off his fingers and narrows his eyes thoughtfully, and then he smiles. If Kurogane were paying attention, he'd be worried by that smile.

"I've changed my mind," he says. "I don't want you to fuck me. I want to suck you off."

Kurogane marks the last paper rather quickly.

It's another day, another lunch time, and Kurogane is making his way to to the chemistry labs because his office smells faintly like sweaty socks and he'd rather put up with Fai's dumbassery than eat his lunch in an office that smells like athlete's foot.

Fai is setting his lab up for a practical with the aid of Subaru - the lab tech who looks like he should still be a student here himself - when Kurogane pushes the door open; he raises a hand in greeting and resumes plugging bunsen burners into gas taps one at a time from a large plastic crate, checking to see whether or not they function correctly. Subaru is doing circuits of the lab with a box of plastic safety goggles, setting them out before the students' chairs. "Oi," Kurogane says by way of greeting.

"Sit down and don't touch anything, Kuro-jock-strap," Fai says absently, lighting another match and applying it to the top of the bunsen burner; it bursts into a foot-long plume of roaring blue flame. Kurogane obeys, although he makes a note to confront the idiot about jock strap when he's not literally playing with fire.

"That's all the goggles, tripods and safety mats," Subaru says, putting the box on the side; the leftover goggles rattle inside it. "I've got the equipment out for the thermite demonstration but I'd keep it in the stockroom until show time if I were you."

"Thank you, Subaru-kun," Fai says calmly. "You should go get some lunch. You need to eat more."

They flash each other quick smiles of mutual respect, and then Subaru quietly backs out of the lab and pushes open the door to the murky recession of the chemistry technician's office. Kurogane unwraps his onigiri and takes a large bite; for a while there's no sound but the roar of bunsen burner flames, the schtrick of matches being struck and his own chewing.

"Kuro-rice should make sure he doesn't drop so much as a crumb," Fai says without taking his eyes off what he's doing. "I give the students detentions for chewing gum in here, I'd hate to be thought a hypocrite."

"Yeah yeah," Kurogane says, cautiously grabbing a blank piece of paper and sticking it underneath him on the desk as he chews. "So what's this thermite thing?"

"Very hot fireworks," Fai says absently. "The kids love it. It's very explosive. I'm taking them out to the playground before I let it go."

Kurogane raises an eyebrow. He's not sure he'd trust Fai with normal fireworks, let alone 'very hot' ones, but the Chairwoman obviously approved the syllabus and he's no chemist so he keeps quiet. He packed the onigiri himself and they're not very good; it's a chore to munch his way through them.

He's just about finished the first one off when there's a cautious rap at the door; they both turn, Fai and Kurogane, to see Yuui standing in the open doorway. He's still wearing his apron, although he's let his hair down, and he looks suddenly nervous and unsure. "Hi," he says, giving Kurogane a small wave. Kurogane responds with a grunt and a nod of his head.

"Yuui~!" Fai says, grinning, and Yuui smiles back and pushes away from the door. He wanders idly through the long tables, peering at the equipment laid out for the students.

"What are you doing with them next?"

"Thermite demonstration," Fai says.

"What, in here?" Yuui sounds faintly alarmed. "Last time you told me you destroyed a table. And a bucket of sand."

Fai's teeth flash in his grin; they are on opposites sides of the classroom, dressed in radically different workplace whites. "No. I'm doing a demonstration outside, and then they're coming back and doing something boring with magnesium."

"As long as you're honest," Yuui says, smiling crookedly. He wanders up to the teacher's desk on its raised dias and then pauses; Kurogane hesitates with his second onigiri in his hand. Yuui smiles at him nervously, reaching up to tuck his hair away from his face. "Did you make those yourself, Kurogane-san?"

Kurogane grunts. "Yeah."

Yuui bites his lip, looking like he wants to comment, but doesn't; Kurogane eventually has enough of his dithering and says, "Cooking isn't my thing."

"He's dreadful," Fai helpfully adds, and Kurogane growls at him to no effect.

"Um," Yuui says, his hands fluttering together. "Um, if you like I... I make lunches for myself and Fai too, to stop him eating sugar out the bag... I could make you some too?"

For a moment Kurogane thinks he must have misheard; then he immediately thinks of Watanuki, who he passes every morning on his way to school waiting patiently at the corner of the girl's student housing complex with a carefully packed extra bento, waiting for Himawari. He carefully lowers the plain (overcooked) rice ball in his hand. Yuui's face is faintly pink.

"Sure," he says. "If you want."

Yuui flashes him a shy smile. "Okay," he says. "Okay."

Over his shoulder, Fai smiles quietly and sparks another match, and another bunsen burner flame whooshes to life. The sound makes Yuui whirl away from Kurogane, smoothing his hands down the front of his apron.

"I got in contact with that restaurant downtown, Fai," he says. "I got us a seven-thirty booking, since you said -"

Fai drops the matchbox and theatrically claps both hands to the top of his head. "Seven-thirty? Oh, Yuui, I -"

"I can reschedule," Yuui offers.

"What, again?" Fai shoots him a scandalized look. "I've made you miss three bookings already, Yuui!"

"It's not your fault," his twin replies, laughing, and Fai frowns and pads up to the raised teacher's desk from the other side, leaning against it with his arms folded. The collar of his lab coat sticks up and covers his throat. He studies Yuui fiercely, his eyes narrowed; Kurogane continues chewing his way through the unappetising self-made rice ball. "Take Kuro-bad cook," he says.

"What?" Yuui says.

"The hell?" Kurogane demands.

Fai pushes himself off the desk, clapping his hands together. "It's perfect!" he enthuses. "Kuro-useless didn't have any plans tonight except laying around in his underwear watching samurai films -"

"I have never -"

"- And Yuui wants to go out but can't go by himself because only nerds and serial killers eat at restaurants by themselves!"

Yuui raises an eyebrow.

"I'm just saying it's perfect," Fai continues. "Kuro-tan, really, what else do you have planned?"

Kurogane gestures uncertainly, and Fai gives him a smug I knew it expression. "I hate you," Kurogane growls.

"No you don't," Fai replies airily. "Well, not all the time, anyway. Remember, seven-thirty! Dress nice."

"I don't even know what kind of restaurant it is!" Kurogane snaps, and Yuui clears his throat discretely.

"It's um, the brand new Italian place," he says.

Kurogane glances at him sidelong and then sighs heavily. "Fine," he says, and Yuui gives him a small shy smile. It's uncertain and oddly sweet. "You got my cell phone number?"

Yuui shakes his head, so he tears a corner off the (greasy) paper he had used to catch errant bits of onigiri and writes it down in thick red teacher's ballpoint, and Yuui takes it very carefully by the edges before folding it gently and slipping it into the breast pocket of his apron, and Kuro tosses away the rest of his lunch and stands up with as much dignity as he can.

"I'm going back to my office," he says.

"Have fun, don't die," Fai says, heading back to his bunsen burners.

"I... I'll see you later," Yuui says, carefully avoiding eye contact, and Kurogane grunts and leaves and lets the door close behind him, and as he jogs down the plain science block staircase he wonders what the hell he's gotten himself into.

Damn twins.

"So, the black one?"

"... Yeah, I guess."

"With the white shirt, of course. The one from Ralph Lauren that your father and I bought you -"

"Mom, I know how to dress myself."

"I know, darling. I know. It's just, you haven't had that many dates before -"

"I'm a grown man. I know what I'm doing."

His mother laughs, her voice tinny down the phone lines. "I'm not saying you don't, sweetheart. I just think -"

"Wait, what do you mean 'you haven't had that many dates before'? This isn't a date."

"Of course it isn't -"

"No, this really isn't a date, you don't understand -"

"Sssh, Kurogane. It's alright. You don't have to say anything."

"..."

"Your father says to remind you red suits you. Do you still have the cummerbund and tie...?"

"This. Is not. A date."

"Of course it's not, sweetie. But you should wear the red with that suit regardless."

"..."

"So are you coming home for the school holidays?"

"I - I. I have to go. Now."

A chuckle. "Very well, darling. Remember to be nice."

"I'm always nice," Kurogane growls darkly, and hangs up quickly before his mother can refute that.

It's raining when Kurogane's cab pulls in at the kerb, but Yuui is already there, standing quietly down the road from the restaurant in a black trench coat holding a blue umbrella above him. When he sees Kurogane through the window of the car he smiles, and it makes his eyes shine like the glistening raindrops beading fat on the umbrella's surface; he makes his way over to the kerb and holds the umbrella out a little bit as Kurogane climbs out.

"It's quarter past seven," Kurogane says, frowning at him.

"I didn't want to be late," Yuui replies.

He steps to one side as Kurogane unfurls his own umbrella, a black monstrosity with a curved handle that Fai had given him for his birthday one year (along with a fleshlight and a bottle of lube, because Fai is insane). Underneath the trench coat, Yuui is wearing a black suit and a white shirt, but his tie is blue; blue as his eyes, and for some reason Kurogane feels that stupid fucking flush rising in his face and has to look away. "We should get moving," he says.

"Of course," Yuui murmurs, and when Kurogane glances back at him his eyes are swept down. He glances up long enough to make eye contact and smiles at Kurogane briefly before turning and pointing at the restaurant in question further up the street; it looks expensive.

"How did you get reservations for this place so quick?" Kurogane asks, scowling. They are trying to walk in sync but the sidewalk isn't really wide enough for two tall men with umbrellas to walk side by side, and eventually Yuui dips his and folds it back up, fastening the strap around his wrist and stepping closer to Kurogane to shelter under his wider umbrella.

"The head chef went to school with me in Florence," he says.

Kurogane quirks an eyebrow. "Really?" he says. "Isn't that cheating?"

"I suppose," Yuui concedes, but he's smiling. "She's the reason I let my hair grow out. The chef who trained us was... not very fond of women, I don't know what the term is in Japanese -"

"Sexist," Kurogane offers, and Yuui shoots him a quick grateful smile.

"He was always yelling at her about her hair, even though she tied it back and wore a cap over it. So, I decided to grow mine out in solidarity."

"Tch. I'm not surprised," Kurogane says, and Yuui flushes briefly. "Seems like the kind of thing you'd do."

"Fai would have done the same thing," Yuui says quietly as they step inside, and a woman steps up to greet them. She takes their coats and guides them to their seats, and Kurogane doesn't say anything as she takes their drink orders - wine for Yuui, and then wine for Kurogane too after Yuui persuades him to order something other than sake - and leaves them alone with their menus.

"Fai wouldn't do the same thing," Kurogane says. "Your idiot brother would go yell at your teacher, or whatever."

Yuui tilts his head to one side. "We're not that different -"

"Yes, you are."

A pause. Yuui toys with the cuffs of his jacket and doesn't meet Kurogane's eyes; he knows Kurogane speaks the truth. Their server materialises with a wine bottle and a corkscrew, and Kurogane watches her as she pours them both sparkling glasses of white wine. Yuui thanks her with a smile and a nod and she curtseys and then leaves as Yuui delicately lifts his glass and takes a sip; his face softens with pleasure.

"It's good," he says. "Try some."

Kurogane does. It doesn't suck. He's not a wine taster and he rejects the kind of pompous waffle about bouquet and so on and so forth, but it's decent enough wine, and the way Yuui smiles at him over the tabletop is pleasant.

"So why did you give up the piano?" he asks, because it's either that or you look good in that outfit, and Yuui blinks and surprise and puts his wine glass down.

"Fai told you I played?"

"Indirectly."

"Oh." Yuui grins at him crookedly. "I see. Yes, I used to play. So did our mother. Fai wasn't really interested, but he liked to be around while I played, so..."

Quietly he draws his fingertip across the menu spread out before him, tracing the word appetisers.

"The thing is, Kurogane-san, I don't... I don't know how much you know about us. You didn't know we were Icelandic, I'm not -"

"Assume basically nothing," Kurogane interrupts, and watches the way Yuui's mouth tightens.

"Our father was a university lecturer who came to Tokyo on an exchange. Our mother was an heiress. We were born here, and our parents decided to send us to school publically so that we would grow up knowing the language." His hands drifted down across the menu, the tasteful names of the dishes in Italian and Japanese. "Our mother was diagnosed with cancer when we were five. She lasted two years, despite all that medicine could do.

"After she died our father stopped... caring. He would just sit at home on the sofa, skipping out of work and not making us go to school, and he drank, and he cried. And eventually a friend of his from home came to see him, because he was worried; and he saw how bad it was and made father go see a psychiatrist, and we went back to Iceland with him."

"Ashura," Kurogane says quietly, and Yuui glances up in surprise. "Fai said Ashura sometimes mails him stuff from home."

Yuui smiles. "Yes. We weren't meant to stay with him permanently, just until father got back on his feet; but... he didn't. After we'd been living with Ashura for two years he and my father applied for him to formally adopt us. I played the piano for years because it was my way of keeping hold of my mother, do you see?"

Kurogane doesn't see, so he shakes his head. "Both my parents are alive," he says shortly. "Mom's a journalist, dad's a police officer. Runs a dojo miles away from here when he's not working."

He's never told Fai that, he realizes, and it's a strange feeling. Is Fai so uninformative because Kurogane is? Or is it vice versa?

"That sounds nice," Yuui says softly. There's a wistful light in his eyes. "Do you speak to them regularly?"

Kurogane grunts. He's wearing the red tie and cummerbund.

"Why'd you start cooking?" he asks, because he'd really rather not go into that.

Yuui grins at him mischievously; it's Fai's grin, the naughty one that requires co-conspirators. "Ashura used to give us pocket money. Just a little bit, to spend on ourselves, for video games, comic books, sweets and so on. Fai worked out very quickly that for one small sweet that would last him perhaps fifteen minutes, he could buy a bag of sugar and eat that with a spoon for the same price."

"... I'm not surprised," Kurogane says again, although he is faintly appalled. He'd thought Yuui had been joking.

Yuui laughs at the expression on his face. "I started baking treats to try and save his teeth," he says. "I liked it, so I learned how to make more things."

"And then you turned professional, huh?"

"Something like that," Yuui agrees. Their server approaches, a big smile on her face and the menu under her arm, and asks if they're ready to order; Kurogane notices how she turns to him first, and speaks slower and more carefully when she's speaking to Yuui. He hadn't even checked the menu, too busy talking, and he does so while Yuui orders, curling his tongue slowly around the Italian dish names in a way that makes Kurogane feel oddly alert.

"I recommend the 'Casseruola alla fiorentina.' It was the signature dish of the head chef when I knew her," he says, and Kurogane grunts.

"What's in it?" he asks and Yuui tells him; it has too much cheese in, and when he confides to Yuui that he's lactose intolerant he can see the way Yuui's face subtly changes - sympathy. They pour over the menus together, and eventually Yuui helps him pick out a squid meal that looks nice, as well as an appetiser and a side-dish to go with it.

"Fai hates raw fish," Yuui says as they pass over their menus. "But he's actually allergic to almonds."

"And you?"

"Me?" Yuui looks surprised, and then grins crookedly. "I'm not allergic to anything anymore."

"Do you hate fish?"

"No. I can make a pretty good calamari, actually."

"Huh, at least one of you isn't a failure," Kurogane opines, and Yuui chuckles as he idly unfolds his napkin.

They order a refill on their wine, and then Yuui asks Kurogane about tomorrow's lessons and Kurogane begins talking about his students and classes; a natural enough topic for teachers. Yuui shyly offers commentary on his own, and Kurogane asks him how he's settling in, and Yuui listens to him complain about Yuuko, and then, well, the conversation continues pleasantly enough. It only pauses when the food arrives, and even then not entirely.

"It's strange," Yuui says quietly as he arranges his knife and fork next to each other neatly on his empty plate. "I haven't really been able to talk to anyone like this aside from, well, Fai. Maybe it's the wine?"

"Maybe," Kurogane says shortly, eyeing the bottle. Their server had left it there after their third glass. He's not drunk - he's maybe tipsy at best - but he can't feel that tingle in his fingertips and that lick of warmth in his belly that comes from being drunk. Yuui appears to be holding up better than expected, too; perhaps high alcohol tolerance is hereditary. Fai can drink him under the table.

"Thank you for coming, Kurogane-san," Yuui says, and smiles at him. The wine has left a dusky red across his pale foreigner's cheeks. "I appreciate it. I do."

"It's fine," Kurogane says. "How are you getting back?"

"Taxi."

"Me too, we'll share. We're going to the same place, anyways."

Yuui smiles at that and neatly folds his napkin, tossing it back onto the table next to his plate. "Of course," he says. The server approaches with the bill; Yuui takes out his wallet and sends her back with his credit card before Kurogane can protest. "It's fine. I was going to pay for Fai anyway, and you ate far less than he would have, Kurogane-san."

"Tch. Just Kurogane," Kurogane growls, embarrassed at having his dinner paid for reasons he doesn't fully understand, and watches the way Yuui's eyebrows lift. "I'll get the cab fare, then."

"If you like," Yuui says, and he's smiling at him, that slightly teasing smile that belongs on his brother's face. Affronted, Kurogane leans across the table.

"I'm not a girl," he says.

Yuui looks faintly puzzled. "I never said you were."

Kurogane shrugs. "Yeah. Well. Just so you know."

"Okay," Yuui agrees, with the air of humouring him, and Kurogane growls under his breath and looks away as their server returns with the receipt. Yuui signs it in an elegant, looping script; and then they are sliding out from their seats and their coats are being returned to them. Kurogane's umbrella is still damp.

The rain has slowed, which is good; there's a shortage of cabs waiting outside. It takes them a little while to flag a passing one, and it's Kurogane who gives the driver directions while Yuui sits quietly in the back seat and stares out of the window.

"I had a good time," Yuui says abruptly as the cab turns into the staff car park of their apartment complex. "Thank you... Kurogane."

"It's fine," Kurogane says absently. He'd've given anything to hear his name like that from Fai, but somehow the way Yuui says it is warm and unique, and he quite likes it. He counts out the driver's cash in notes, and Yuui waits for him at the door into the building. He tilts his face up when Kurogane approaches and smiles, and for a moment, just a moment, looking down at him framed in the doorway with his own arm extended to catch the door, Kurogane finds he just wants to... move. That last inch.

He catches himself and watches the way Yuui's pupils dilate, and thinks that if he had fallen, Yuui wouldn't have said no. "Listen -" they say in unison.

"You first -"

"Whatever, you want to -"

"Fine," Yuui says firmly. His eyes are very dark; the only light is a fluorescent bulb above his head, and it makes his skin look even paler than usual, but his eyes are the inky blue of the deep sea. "Kurogane, I... I'm not trying to poach you. Okay? I. I don't want that."

"No. No, obviously," Kurogane says, shaken.

"I mean if I had - but I haven't, I - Well. Fai got you, didn't he? And you're good for him, I... I wouldn't," Yuui murmurs, his eyes wide and earnest, and Kurogane swallows. His heart feels like it's contracting, or maybe it's his rib cage that's shrinking, crushing it relentlessly.

"No. Me either. You're his, his brother. I'm not trying to - I mean, I'm not that shallow, I know you're two very different people," he says and Yuui nods desperately in time to his words. There's no warm smile on his face now.

They're still too close.

It's Yuui who breaks eye contact first. "Thank you for the evening," he whispers, and then he's inching back, inching away, and then he's gone, just his feet sounding on the cold stone of the complex stairs.

Kurogane lowers his head and quietly hisses every Japanese curse phrase he knows, followed by the foreign ones the twins have taught him since he met them; English, Icelandic, Italian. It doesn't help.

The next day he hands out forty seven detentions to students for offences such as lateness, attitude and personal presentation. When he catches a couple holding hands near the science block he gives them a fifteen minute detention for unprofessional conduct, and it's only when the kids have fled his wrath does he look up and see Fai leaning against the wall watching him, his arms folded over his chest and one ankle hooked negligently over the other.

He doesn't hang around.

He's in his office after school with his door locked, barricading himself in with papers. He's fairly sure he locked the window, too, so when he hears that telltale scrabbling he groans inwardly and sinks back in his chair as Fai hauls himself in over the windowsill.

"The hell do you want," he growls. "And how did you get in?"

"In reverse order, I have a key and Yuui made you lunch," Fai replies cheerfully, rolling his legs over and standing up straight. He has a plain bento box in one hand. "However, he didn't see you this morning before school and he couldn't find you at lunchtime, so ta-daa~! Here's lunch at four o'clock."

"I've been busy," Kurogane growls, and Fai snorts and delicately puts the box on the corner of his desk.

"Kuro-liar is terrible at his chosen occupation," he says.

Kurogane snarls at him and turns his page with rather more force than he needs to. "What the hell do you want," he says.

Fai plants both hands on his desk and leans forward, and suddenly there's no humour in those shining blue eyes at all. His lab coat falls open around his hips, making him appear bigger. "Really, Kuro-tan, you're a thirty year old man," Fai says. "Grow up and talk about what's bothering you."

"Twenty-eight," Kurogane corrects, but sighs and raises a hand, rubbing at his temples. "Is this for you or for Yuui?"

"Maybe it's both," Fai says, and Kurogane glares at him. He shrugs. "Yuui means a lot to me, Kuro-slow."

"And I don't, right. I got you."

Fai picks up the top paper from a stack on Kurogane's desk, flips it over to see which student wrote it, and then flings it wildly over his shoulder; Kurogane twitches. "I like you," Fai says flatly. "I mostly like your cock, I'll be upfront about that. But Yuui likes you too, Kuro-dense. What happened last night?"

Kurogane shrugs. "Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"Nothing. Are you happy? I'm stupid enough that I respect you enough to not make out with your identical twin."

Fai watches him. There's nothing in his expression, nothing at all. "I think you used one too many 'enoughs' there," he says.

"This doesn't bother you?" Kurogane demands. "It seemed to bother your twin."

Fai sighs and folds his arms over his chest. "Look, I don't like talking about me," he says, seriously. "I really don't. If Yuui hadn't gone and stupidly -" He sighs. "Yuui means a lot to me, okay? He always has. But he means less to me now than he... used to. We grew up and grew apart."

Kurogane snorts. "You don't act like it. You're acting more like a meddling ex than a protective older brother -"

Fai raises a pointed eyebrow, and Kurogane feels his sentence sputter to a halt. For a moment he just stares at Fai stupidly, sure he's misinterpreting; Fai breaks eye contact and looks thoughtfully out of the window, still standing before Kurogane's desk like a student about to receive a dressing down.

"Are you serious?" Kurogane breathes.

Fai brushes some imaginary dust off the edge of his lab coat. Kurogane shoves his chair back and crosses over to the door, checking that it's locked; he pulls the window back down and flips the catch on that, too.

"Are you telling me -?"

"Yes," Fai says calmly.

Kurogane slumps on the edge of his desk, running one hand through his hair. "I don't... when?"

"Before we graduated high school," Fai says. "We were so close we were almost one person when we came back to Iceland, and then we began to split apart, and that scared us. So we tried to fix it."

"With incest?" Kurogane breathes, leaning closer and lowering his voice, and Fai shrugs.

"With whatever we could," he says, and there is genuine sadness in his voice. "I didn't... You're an only child, right, Kuro-tan? I... we were just two. Mother was sick and father was busy and then lost, and we were two. And... And I would have done anything to keep it that way, but..."

"But what?" Kurogane asks, despite himself.

"But it didn't work. We just kept growing apart - kept growing up. And... And then one day Yuui left for Italy, and I... didn't."

He looks away at this point, and Kurogane realizes this is the most emotionally honest he's ever seen Fai.

"You understand that once you've had that kind of relationship, it's... hard to have another with someone else," Fai says, quietly. "I don't feel that way for him anymore... but I still love him more than anything else I have, do you understand?"

Kurogane narrows his eyes. "And that's why you're so standoffish," he says. "Tch, I should've guessed."

"I'm not sorry for what we did," Fai says fiercely, glaring at him. "Especially since we're not doing it anymore. But I want him to be happy, Kuro-tan, and for whatever reason he picked you to care about, and I don't mind sharing my toys with him because I've been doing it all my life."

Kurogane flushes red, with anger more than embarrassment. "I am not your toy!"

Fai's eyes cut to his. They are as blue as Yuui's; identical. For all their superficial similarities however Kurogane by now knows the differences between them, and he scowls deeply at the blond. "Do you want to kiss Yuui, Kuro-blush?"

"I don't blush!"

"But do you?" Fai persists, and Kurogane hesitates. Fai's clothes rustle as he leans closer, and he's not smiling. "Do you want to kiss my brother?"

Kurogane glares at him, but Fai doesn't back down, and this isn't the goofy, distant Fai he knows. "Shouldn't you ask him what he thinks first?" he says, acidly. "You're the older brother. Is this even what he wants?"

Fai scowls at him. "You think I'm taking advantage of him," he guesses. "Or looking for some way to get back in bed with him? Kurogane, I thought you were smarter than that."

It's the first time he's ever called Kurogane by his first name. It sounds much worse than when Yuui uses it.

"I want Yuui to be happy because I love him. Maybe more than I should, but not in the ways you're insinuating. Do you want to kiss him or not?"

Kurogane frowns, and Fai takes it as an affirmative, because he continues, "I want to share you with him. Not at the same time, but in general. I don't want you to have to pick which one of us you'd rather stick with. You may not have noticed, Kurogane, but we're different people."

"I noticed," Kurogane says coldly. "And he didn't kiss me because he didn't want to steal me from you. What are you gonna do about that?"

Fai straightened up from the desk and folded his arms back over his chest, then sucked in a deep breath and let it out in a sigh. "Next week I'm going to a conference in London," he says. "It's a conference related to my field of expertise, it's quite important academically speaking, and I used up an awful lot of holiday time to get the whole week off."

"The whole week," Kurogane repeats quietly.

"I'll be gone from early Sunday straight through to late the following Sunday," Fai continues. "Leaving you and Yuui alone. Back here. Do I have to draw you a picture, Kuro-sama?"

Kurogane sighs. "No," he says, and Fai's lab coat swishes as he makes his way over to the window catch.

"Listen," he says, and for the first time Kurogane's known him he sounds less than confident. "Don't... don't tell anybody what I told you, okay? Not so much for me, but... Yuui means a lot to me. Don't..." He pauses, groping for words to describe what he means, and Kurogane takes pity on him.

"I won't," he says. "Get lost, idiot."

"I'll see you later, Kuro-sama," Fai says, and then he's gone, leaving Kurogane behind in the sudden coldness of his office with nothing but his thoughts (and the mental image of two blonds kissing which he really doesn't need, even if they are hot as fuck) for company.

Goddamn idiot, Kurogane thinks tetchily. Always has to go around fucking up his life.

It's five in the morning, and Kurogane's going through his kendo routine in the gym before school starts.

Even after quitting the sport professionally, there's something about doing kendo he finds restful. It's in the ability to clear his mind; how each sharp, flickering slash requires his absolute focus to direct it where it needs to go. It's in the burn of exercising muscles and the power and the control needed to direct the wooden sword with the perfect amount of force, and the concentration required to maintain optimum footing as he slides from one kata into another.

He chose to eschew the formal garb, keeping to his tracksuit as he moves, but he remains barefoot and the gym mats are cold and slick beneath his toes. They provide more than enough traction as he spins and turns, letting loose the traditional roar as he does so; and he is making enough noise that it is not until the gym door slams closed that he realises he has an observer.

Yuui is standing quietly just inside the door, his bag slung cross-wise across his chest. There are dark circles under his eyes, like he hasn't been sleeping very well, and his normally sleek and fine hair is slightly mussed. When Kurogane slows from his kata, Yuui gives him a small, tired smile.

"Fai said you liked to practise here," he says, his voice oddly echoed in the gym hall.

Kurogane snorts. "Don't ask me how he knows," he says, lowering his sword, and makes his cautious way over to Yuui who watches him approach quietly. "He's never come here while I've been exercising."

"Maybe not that you've seen," Yuui says softly. He swallows as Kurogane climbs off the gym mats and stands before him, looking down to keep eye contact; even barefoot Kurogane has a couple of inches on him. His fingers toy nervously with the strap of his bag. "I brought you lunch."

"Thanks," Kurogane says uncertainly, and Yuui turns away to open up his bag and fish out the lunch box. It's the same one that Fai brought him two days ago. He thinks Fai took it from his apartment when Fai came to him yesterday.

Their hands brush as Yuui hands over the bento. Yuui's eyes remain downcast and soft. "Do you want something to drink?" Kurogane blurts, "I've got uh, some decent green tea in my office."

"Fai said he told you what we used to do," Yuui says quietly.

Kurogane pauses. "I'm sorry," he says. "I didn't ask to know that."

"It's not your fault," Yuui says, still in that hushed, low voice. "My brother can be an... idiot." He sighs, looking miserable. "I didn't want you to know that about me, Kurogane. I'm... I'm not sorry for what we did, and I'm not sorry for what we were, but I didn't want you to think ill of me."

"I don't," Kurogane replies awkwardly. "I mean. I didn't like it when I heard, but I thought about it, and I... it's got nothing to do with me, does it? What you and the idiot did together then was what you and the idiot did together then, and I don't care about your pasts."

"You really don't care?" Yuui peers at him thoughtfully. "Really?"

"Tch. What the two of you do is no business of mine," Kurogane growls. "Besides..." He hesitates. "Did you know about the Japanese myth about twins?"

"No," Yuui says.

"The myth says..." Kurogane gestures uncomfortably, and unfortunately, vaguely. The confusion in Yuui's face does not dissipate, and he sighs heavily. "When two fated lovers commit suicide over each other, they're reborn as twins. There. You learned something today."

"Are you suggested Fai and I killed each other in a past life, so we were reincarnated as twins?" Yuui looks incredulous. "That has to be the most unfair move ever. If we loved each other so much we died for each other, why were we reborn related to each other?"

"Don't ask me, ask the gods," Kurogane snaps.

"It's like a celestial cockblock," Yuui complains, and Kurogane looks at him. "What?"

"You sound like your brother," Kurogane says.

Yuui grins. "Well, we are related."

"Hard to believe," says Kurogane. "There's no way your twin would be awake at five o'clock in the morning to give someone a lunchbox."

"Fai always was a terrible morning person," Yuui agrees, and hesitates. "I... I wanted to make sure you got that. If nothing else."

Kurogane thinks about what to say for a moment, and then another, and still nothing presents itself. He looks down at the crown of blond hair, the faint pinkness of face. His bare feet are splayed out across the shiny wood of the gym floor, sandwiching Yuui's polished dark work shoes between them.

"Do you want to come get some tea in my office?" he says eventually, and Yuui's grateful nod brings a crooked smile to the corner of his mouth.

"I'd like that very much," Yuui whispers, and he grins at Kurogane with warmth in his eyes. "Fai said..."

"Your brother is an idiot," Kurogane says, and then quickly, "Look, did he tell you he was going away this weekend...?"

Yuui bites his lip. "Yes."

"Okay. Look, I don't know what he told you he expected from us..." Yuui flushes and Kurogane snaps his gaze up at the ceiling immediately, fighting not to mimic the blond. For fuck's sake, he's getting worse than Sakura, and he doesn't know how the twins can do that to him. He clears his throat. "Whatever your idiot brother said," he continues firmly, "We don't have to listen to him."

"Of course not," Yuui says quickly and gratefully. "Nothing has to change between us just because he's gone, Kurogane."

"Yeah, you're right," Kurogane says, just as quickly. "He's too used to getting his own way."

"He is the older twin," Yuui points out delicately and then smiles. "I'm glad you said something though, Kurogane. It keeps things from being awkward."

Kurogane clears his throat. "It's fine," he says, becoming aware that he's losing his battle with blushing, and resolves to come in a half-hour earlier tomorrow to work out as if that can make up for how fucking girly these twins make him. Yuui shoots him a quick, sweet grin, and goddamnit.

Yeah, it's a losing battle all right.

-tbc

Notes -

Thermite: This is a mix of aluminium ('aluminum' in the US) and iron oxide that when ignited, burns at 2,400 degrees celcius (water boils at 100 degrees). Go look 'thermite vs car' up on youtube for a clip of thermite being used to basically destroy a Citroen car.
Fleshlight: This is a sex toy for men. It's a long black cylinder designed to look like a flashlight, but when you take the cap off you can see that it's lined with soft silicone and the 'top' is shaped like various human orifices. Yeah. Fai's a CLASSY BOY.