Disclaimer: still don't own castle

Four years ago, if you told Rick Castle that he would be running down these same hospital hallways, for the same person, just five months later, he would think that you're just a deranged fan. If you told him that he would fall in love with her, he wouldn't believe you. If you told him that he can't admit his love to her face, he would laugh.

If you told all of this to him six months ago he would protect her so she wouldn't go to the hospital. He would say that following her is purely for research, but let a smirk overcome his face as he walks away. He would tell you that he is just giving her time and space.

But right now, at this moment when he is, once again running down the halls of a hospital, he realizes that because of space and time, he might be too late. But instead he runs to the nurses' station.

"Kate, um Detective Kate Beckett, she came in here a little while ago with two other detectives, Kevin Ryan and Javier Esposito. Where are they? What is their current status?" He needed to know that Kate was okay, because he needed to know. And he needed the boys to be okay because they were a family now.

"Are you family? Because I can only allow her family to go in."

"Yes, well- no I'm her, uh." She was going to kill him if she found out but he needed to get in there. "I'm her boyfriend."

The nurse agreed to let him in because he looked as if his whole world was falling apart. And for all she knew, it might have been. And to him, it all was.

Before the nurse left, she told him that the doctors had to sedate her, because she was in the midst of a PTSD panic attack. So, there he was just standing at the doorway, staring at her sleeping body. He walked over to her and brushed some hair out of her face, and lightly kissed her forehead. He turned around to pull up a chair and was surprised to see a pair of two emerald, green eyes looking at his piercing, blue eyes.

"Kate, hi."

"Rick, are you okay? How's Martha doing?" She missed those eyes, and that smile that's always on his face whenever he sees her.

"Yes, Mother and I are fine, but forget about that. How are you doing?"

"I'm okay; I just lost it I guess. What with you and then the boys. Oh god, the boys! Are they okay? I was so scared and I didn't know what to do." As Castle listened to her talk, he could hear the beeping on the monitors getting faster with each word that came out of her mouth.

"Yeah Kate, they're fine. Kate, Kate! Listen to me, take a deep breath." He took her hand in his and stroked it with the back of his thumb. "The boys are okay, they were sedated when I checked on them. But Lanie is most likely with Esposito and Jenny's probably with Ryan. So, now I'm going to be with you."

"Rick, I was so scared in there. I thought that I had lost you and the boys. I don't know what I would do if you were gone." She knew right as the words left her lips, that they were not what she wanted to say.

"But I'm okay, so you don't need to think about that." He knew that she wasn't in the right state of mind to deal with that right now.

"Rick, while I was in the elevator, it made me re-think some things." He said always, time to see if he'll keep his promise.

"Kate-,"

"No Rick, I need to say this, because I'm not sure if I will be able to again." She waited for him to nod his head.

"I was thinking about what might have happened if I couldn't get out. I started thinking of my dad and Lanie, and you. All of the times that I almost died, you were always there with me; the freezer, the bomb, Roy's funeral. You were there, you were always there. I thought the you had the right to know that -." It's all or nothing. "That you should know that I remember everything from the cemetery. The shot, the screams, what you said."

"Kate." He knew that whenever they were close to something between them, and this was too far already.

"No Castle! Let me say this!" She was getting out of breath, and she felt dizzy. "Let me tell you that I -."

That was the last thing that she could say before her eyes rolled into the back of her head. Then, all of the monitors started beeping.

A/N: cliff hanger :) Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but keep reviewing!