We see a shot of the Griffins' house accompanied by the usual background music.
The camera then switches- we see Stewie in his room looking through his dresser.
STEWIE Brian? Brian! Could you come in here?
Camera zooms out- we see Brian enter
BRIAN What? I was in the middle of doing- well- doing dog stuff
STEWIE (MUMBLING AND TAUNTING)
You were probably chewing your butt, weren't you?
BRIAN That doesn't matter. What did you want?
STEWIE I need your help deciding something.
BRIAN What?
STEWIE Which dress looks better?
Stewie holds up two dresses, almost identical in size and color.
BRIAN Why do you need to wear a dress?
STEWIE Never mind that. Just help me decide!
BRIAN I don't know, they look the same.
STEWIE What? I spent $300 and 4 hours at the store trying to pick out two different dresses, and now you tell me those hours were wasted?
BRIAN I- I didn't think-
STEWIE No, you didn't- My God, you're useless.
BRIAN How the hell did you even get $300 in the first place?
STEWIE The sameplace i always do- Peter's wallet- I just take his credit card from his pocket when he's passed out drunk, then return it before he wakes up.
BRIAN Well, ok then.
We hear Lois enter downstairs, and offscreen.
LOIS God Damnit! Peter!
Brian leaves the room and the shot changes to the livingroom, where, as if on cue, Peter is lying drunk on the floor.
PETER (IN DRUNK TALK)
Lois, youre home! Did-did you gets the- the-
Peter tries to stand up but falls back flat on his face
LOIS Damnit! Peter! Were you drinking all day?
PETER (IN DRUNK TALK)
It-wa-itwas forreason- Lois. I won the-the contest-
Peter passes back out. Fade to black.
SCENE II
Fade in. We see the Smiths' house accompanied by background music. We see the Smiths' livingroom with Roger sitting on the couch, watching TV, with a martini in hand. Shot changes to the TV. The news is on, and we see Greg and Terry already reporting.
GREG And if you are just tuning in, we are live here at the Washington convention center getting ready for BeerCon 2012!
TERRY That's right, this annual convention not only features the world's best beers, but a wide assortment of other liquors!
Shot switches back to Roger. His eyes widen and he drops his martini. Enter Stan from the kitchen looking through the mail.
ROGER Oh! Stan! We haaave to go to BeerCon this year!
STAN This again! For the last time Roger, tickets to that are like $500 a person! If you want to go you have to get the money yourself.
ROGER Oh, come on! You're in the CIA!
Cant you just intimidate them into giving us free VIP passes?
STAN Yes, but why would I want to do that? You're the only one in the house that drinks.
ROGER Not true! Francine does too! Watch,
Francine! Wanna go to BeerCon?
Francine immediately comes in, completely dressed in BeerCon apparel.
FRANCINE Did someone say BeerCon?
STAN Fine! We can go. When is it?
ROGER Lets see... In about 10 minutes
FRANCINE Lets Go!