Battle of Love
Chapter 9
ELI
Right when everything seems good in my life, it is always torn away. I've accepted this fact over the years, but that doesn't make it any easier to cope when it happens in actuality. Clare said that she likes me. She likes me. I couldn't help but think about how many months I waited for her to say something remotely civil towards me. How many times did I rewrite Love Roulette in hopes of making it have this exact ending? Why does life decide to screw me over now?
I was holding the love of my life for what seemed to be the first time in forever. I had just about forgotten everybody and everything apart from the crying girl in my arms. We were comforting each other; she recently had a gun pressed against her head while I have a permanent ticking time bomb inside mine. Clare's touch (like my medication) desensitized the bomb for a while, therefore giving me the rationality to soothe her. I kissed the tears from her cheeks and rubbed her upper back, doing everything I could think of to ease her pain. She soon started to calm down, relaxing into my embrace.
"Aw, look. My two favorite couples. Care if I join your game?" Fitz's hoarse voice sounded very close.
Clare's petite body jolted up so fast that her head slammed into my chin, causing me to bite my tongue, hard. My mouth was immediately immersed in the taste of blood and I nearly gagged. That was the last of my worries, though. I whipped around to see Fitz standing at the open metal door holding a gun against a blond girl's head. Her expression reminded me of Clare's just a few moments ago; terrified and pleading. I panicked, not knowing that Fitz was going to bring someone else into this. Also, I didn't have time to tell Tori or Zig the second part to my plan. We'd just have to improvise. "Maya!" Tori yelled.
I spat out the blood in my mouth before murmuring to Clare. "You'll have to do it now honey."
She nodded and gave me a tiny sad smile before she faced Fitz. Oh, how I'm going to hate this. I thought.
"Oh please Fitz, Eli and I aren't together anymore. He's just a psycho who's always been obsessed with me." Clare laughed dryly. Even though I knew Clare didn't mean what she'd said, I still felt a huge lump in my throat at her words. I heard Tori gasp and I turned away from Fitz slightly to mouth to her a quick "play along". She whispered something to Zig and he nodded and grinned at me. Satisfied with our silent agreement, I faced Fitz and Clare's back as she inched towards him. Fitz eyed her hungrily and licked his lips. I gagged again, but not from the taste in my mouth. What a sick fuck.
"You two looked pretty cozy a few seconds ago, candy pants." he observed suspiciously.
"So? I'm allowed to have fun with whoever I want. And that includes you." Clare was now right in front of him, and she placed a finger on his chest on her last word. Fitz looked like he was already under Clare's spell. His gun dropped from the blond girl's head and she ran in my direction. I lifted an eyebrow, but she ran past me towards Tori and Zig. I looked back momentarily and the three of them were in a group hug, the blond girl sobbing and apologizing for some reason I couldn't fathom. I'm the one to blame for this chaos.
I turned back around when I heard a soft whimper. I almost flipped my shit right then and there. Fitz had Clare pressed up against the wall and his hands were groping her dress-clad body. Clare was doing so well, and I knew that instead of going ballistic, I needed to fulfill my side of the plan as well.
"Fitz get the fuck off her!" I yelled.
Fitz slowly, creepily, turned his head in my direction and grinned at me. I glared right back.
"Why, are you jealous emo boy?" he chortled. I looked at Clare behind him who appeared frantic. She was trying to accomplish a key element in our plan; getting Fitz's gun. I soon noticed that Fitz had his gun slung across his shoulder on a strap, making it extra difficult for Clare to get it off in a hurry. My eyes widened and I spoke before thinking.
"Of course not. If anything, you're the jealous one."
Fitz's scoffed and said, "Even though the bitch wants me and not a crazy piece of shit like you."
"Crazy? I'm not the one who created this fucked up prank."
"Yeah, but I heard about your little disorder. And how you crashed your hearse for Clare just because she stood you up for the dance. You are messed, emo boy. Even Saint Clare here thinks so." he grinned and reached back to pat Clare's head. She flinched at the unexpected touch. I was getting seriously enraged, but tried to contain myself for Clare's sake. She was my first priority, and if taking Fitz's harsh words would buy her more time, then I would do it in a heartbeat.
"I might be fucked up but I would never kill another human being." I said quietly. Fitz barked out one short, disbelieving laugh.
"Is that right?" he started to laugh again, harder, and doubled over. I could see over his shoulder that Clare was attempting to use her small fingers to unlatch his gun strap without him feeling it. It must have been very tough, because her face scrunched up in concentration.
Fitz recovered enough from his laughing fit to say, "Then how would you explain the three dead kids down the tunnel? Or if you want to blame those ones on me, go ahead. But what about Julia?"
My stomach dropped and my entire body covered itself in a cold sweat. That was a low blow, even for Fitz.
"Shut. The. Fuck. Up." I growled.
He looked me dead in the eyes for a second and just when I thought he'd decided to heed my suggestion, he snorted. "So you did kill her! Man, that's priceless. I bet you just feel so guilty, don't you?"
I gave him a death glare and breathed heavily through my nose.
When I didn't respond he continued, "You do, I can just tell. I bet you see her lying dead on the pavement, cold and lifeless, when you close your eyes to go to sleep. I bet you imagine yourself behind the wheel of the car that crashed-"
"MARK SHUT UP!" Tori screamed for me, cutting Fitz off. I mentally rolled my eyes. Just about fucking time. Fitz's eyes darted to where Tori sat behind me and I took this distraction as another chance to look at Clare. Her face lit up when I saw that she had gotten the strap undone. She held it carefully on Fitz's shoulder and looked at me to tell her what to do. I gave her a small nod, telling her without speaking to get it over with. She yanked on the strap roughly and the gun went flying to the ground. Fitz barely had time to realize what was going on -for he and Tori were still going back and forth- before Clare grabbed the gun and skirted around him to sprint directly to me. Fitz stood his ground, appearing very shocked. I grinned at him and wrapped my arm around Clare's shoulder, pulling her in to give her a kiss on the lips. We both laughed giddily into the kiss, tasting sweet victory. I pulled away and laughed at Fitz's dumbfounded expression.
"Not so high and mighty anymore, are you Fitzy?" I asked. He switched glares between Clare and I. Clare pointed her gun at his face and said, "How do you like it?" Again, I was impressed by her audacity. Fitz seemed frozen in place for a moment, but then put his fingers to his mouth and blew. The loudest, most annoying whistle came from his lips, and I was surprised Clare's finger didn't flinch from the noise and accidentally pull the trigger. I can't say that I wasn't a little disappointed.
"What the hell was that?" I demanded.
Fitz only grinned and looked behind him. When I saw what he was looking at, I gasped in horror. Emerging from the metal door in a cloud of smoke was a crowd of silhouettes carrying guns. They were the kids we came in the game with. No wonder we hadn't seen them before; they were with Fitz the whole time. Clare's ex, KC Guthrie, was at the front with Fitz and he tossed him another gun. Clare tugged on my t-shirt and whispered, "Eli, I think we should run." I narrowed my eyes at the group but nodded nonetheless and turned on my heels to run towards a tunnel at the back of the cavern. Tori, Zig, and the blond girl must have hauled ass awhile ago, because they were nowhere in sight.
"Run emo boy! Take your little whore too!" Fitz yelled and his and KC's laughter faded away as we ran down the musty tunnel. It smelled disgusting in there. I suddenly slowed as the realization hit and Clare looked back at me, confused.
"This is the tunnel where...you know..." I trailed off, because she knew exactly what I was referring to. This was the tunnel in which Fiona, Declan, and Imogen's bodies were. I shuddered at the thought of Clare going near such morbidity.
"We kind of don't have a choice Eli." she said hurriedly, sensing my distress. I sighed and started to run again, not bothering to see if she was following behind. All I could think about was getting past the bodies. Getting past my friends, that I loved-no love dearly. Imogen, the only girl aside from Clare that truly understood me, is dead. Of all of the times it could have happened, of course the crushing grief would hit me right now, in the cannon's mouth. I slowed again until I stopped in the middle of the tunnel. I sank to my knees, feeling the familiar tightness in my chest that made it hard to breathe. I gasped for air and ripped off my t-shirt, trying to find some way to alleviate the crushing sensation. My heart was hammering in my ears, and I began to cry. I seriously couldn't believe that I was having a full blown anxiety attack right in front of Clare. The fact made me even more panicky. I put my head between my knees and tried in vain to remember what my therapist told me to do in this type of situation.
"Eli are you alright?" Clare asked softly.
Through my hyperventilation and sobbing, I was able to give her a small laugh and say, "Just...a small...panic attack...I'll live."
I felt Clare sit next to me and wrap her arm around my bare shoulders. Already, I knew I was going to be alright.
"Just breathe. Breathe." Clare whispered, gingerly rubbing her palms over my shoulder blades. The first thing to go were the tears from my eyes, so I lifted my head to look at Clare. Her beauty took my breath away, if such a thing was possible in my state. She smiled and hugged me from the side. This caused my hyperventilation to slowly dissipate as well. I could still feel the pain in my chest, but it was dull, subdued.
"Thank you." I murmured, hiding my face in her soft hair. She pulled back and her cheeks were rosy pink. I had to admit, it was damn cute. "I love your blush." I blurted. She smiled again and leaned in slowly- obviously about to kiss me-when there was shouting down the tunnel. "I'll check down here!"
Clare and I jerked back, and she whispered, "That's KC. Come on." She got up and grabbed my hand. I ran with her down the tunnel, the stench of death getting worse and worse the farther we went. Finally, we came across the bodies of Imogen and Fiona. I averted my eyes and pinched my nose with my free hand, and Clare did the same. We stayed close to the wall as we passed. Soon, Imogen, Fiona, and Declan were all behind us and we were free from the horrors. Well, those horrors.
We ran hand in hand until I felt like my lungs were going to burst. I stopped abruptly and Clare's hand was ripped from mine.
"Clare, I can't-I'm sorry. Anxiety attacks take a lot out of you." I clutched my bare sides, which were on fire.
"It's fine. I really need a break right now too," she told me breathlessly. I nodded and led her back to a crevice in the wall. We settled into the tight space, our sides pressed up against each other. Clare giggled.
"What's funny?"
"Nothing. I think I'm going into shock." She laughed again. It was really cute in a weird way.
"Okay Blue Eyes, you do that. Just let me know if you need me to slap you," I joked lightly.
"Sure," she sighed and laid her head on my shoulder. I felt so content with Clare by my side that I really couldn't care less that we were in the stupid cave anymore.
"Hey Eli?" Clare said softly, turning to look up at me.
"Hm?"
"I just wanted to say...if we don't make it out of here our whatever...that I...I love you."
My heart just about jumped out of my chest when she said that. Did I hear her right?
"Uh what?" I asked, just to be sure. She frowned a little.
"I said that I love you...but if you don't feel the same way anymore then I would-" I silenced her rambling with a sweet, chaste kiss. I pulled back and stared into her beautiful blue eyes.
"Clare, I've always loved you. I don't think that I could ever stop." I assured her. I cradled her face in my hands and she smiled. "I'm glad."
We sat like that for an unmeasurable amount of time, until footsteps were heard outside in the tunnel. I peeked out and saw KC walking down the tunnel with his hand over his mouth, as if he were going to wretch.
"Clare? Eli?" he whisper-shouted. Obviously, we didn't answer so he called again. "Guys, if you can hear me just know that I didn't know Fitz is killing people. I'll be on your team. I just saw the three down the hall... oh god." he bent over and threw up. I looked at Clare and she wrinkled her nose in disgust. I winced in agreement upon listening to KC's noises.
"I think we can trust him." she whispered.
"You're serious?"
"Of course I am. I mean, he couldn't really fake vomit without shoving his fingers down his throat. So that means he was really disgusted with the...bodies. If he knew there were dead people in here, he probably wouldn't have come. We should trust him." she repeated. I was a little skeptical, but Clare's reasoning was hard to dispute.
"I'll talk to him." I concluded and she sighed shakily.
"Maybe I should Eli."
"No. I don't want you to get hurt." I almost pleaded with her. She caressed my cheek with her fingertips and sighed again. "Eli I can take care of myself. And this makes the most sense; KC has a soft spot for me since we dated."
I was getting slightly hysteric. I couldn't help it, this situation once again reminded me of that fateful night three years ago. I refused to let another person that I love die, even if that means me getting killed for them.
"Clare, please. I'm begging you here. I love you." She sat silently in response to my pleas, most likely having an internal battle. Finally, she spoke.
"Fine...we'll go together. And this time, we're getting out of here no matter what."
OKAY I LIED. There may be more than one chapter left. In fact, I know there is. Just hang in there, I love you readers! Did you enjoy the cute little eclare scene(s)? I did...and writing them is making me even more excited for July 16th! Woops getting off track here.
Reviews are immensely appreciated. Have a fantastic week, I'll be updating as soon as possible!
(p.s No, I would not like to see anyone cry because of me ))