I am horrible. I haven't updated in forever. But guys, please be aware, these are hard to write. I'm not good with writing torture scenes, which haven't come up yet, but its hard killing my favorite characters (or torturing them) I try to make these good, and it's a little hard, but I hope you enjoy.

Please remember to review, and I'll try to get the next chapter out soon! Thanks guys, it means a lot!

Conversion. What would that mean? He came over and yanked me off the floor, hurting my arm. I heard Johanna call out a goodbye but before I could reply the heavy metal door clanked shut. I was shoved harshly as we walked, my hand held tightly behind my back. They shove me into a room, and after a moment, Portia is shoved in.

"Portia!" I cry as I hug her. She hugs me back and starts sobbing. I hush her, and she looks up at me with sad eyes. She shakes her head, but then sits me down and gets to work.

I was still too thin, being I hadn't eaten much in the last week. She trimmed my hair a little and put make up on my face to hide the shadows. She put drops in my eyes to make them look healthier. When I removed my shirt she almost cried seeing they back. It was red, some parts a little purple from where the nerves had died. The small thing that sent the sharp pulses to my back had cauterized it. She called an attendant to get a doctor to look at it, but none came.

She dressed me, being overly careful of my back even though I couldn't really feel it. The shirt was dark along with everything else. Black pants, shoes, and jacket with a dark crimson shirt. I looked at Portia and saw she was dressed overly well too. A dress that had a color resembling blood and thick black makeup around her eyes. Her hair was dyed black, streaks of red in it as well. Her black glasses were tinted a little more.

"Portia what's going on today?" I ask but she shakes her head. I don't push it. The door is thrown open and 3 large Peacekeepers come in, one taking Portia and the other two grabbing me. We were forced into an elevator, which was cramped with two people in it. My shoulders hit against things and it pinched the shocker sent small zaps through me. I can tell the Guards are unaffected by the sharp pains, and I guess they purposely didn't give me rubber shoes.

We are shoved from the room carefully, and into a large circle of people. Someone pushes an ear piece into my ear, and I try to not growl at the small clicking sound that goes off every couple seconds. They cheer and cry out when they see me. I put my arm lightly over Portia's shoulders as I fake a smile and wave to everyone. They cheer a little louder as they see me reacting to them.

We're lead over to seats, and I notice that tons of guards and Peacekeepers are on the stage. Along with Snow.

"Welcome everyone! I'm glad you could all attend," Do I imagine his eyes piercing into mine as he says that? Maybe. "As many of you know, there has been rebellion forming around us. It's horrible when our District's don't see all we do for them," Snow shakes his head sadly. "But now!" His voice booms around us making me wince. "It has spread to out lovely Capitol! To the place of beauty and safety!" What is he going on about…? "We have come here to punish the Rebels that lie in this once pure city! Bring them out!" Snow's voice cracked. I glanced up to see that would be brought out and I froze.

Tentic, Gem, and Kem all stood bound and hurt.

"NO!" I shouted, standing from my spot. Portia pulled me harshly back into my seat, but I still stared wide eyed.

Tentic was brought up first, forced to his knees. His eyes found mine instantly, and I tried to show how sorry I was. And I saw him give me a small smile.

Bang!

He falls limp to the ground. I can't help the tears fall down my face. In my ear, a blip of static. Words burst in and I fight the urge to rip the damn thing out.

"It was Katniss that did this," I want to yell again, but I know it would be no use, so I sit and morn to myself. Portia cries into my shoulder lightly, but it's quiet. Kem and Gem are both forced down at once, Tentic's body between them. Gem gives me a sad glance, a small, 'don't feel bad,' raised in her eyes.

Bang!

Kem let a scream rise in her throat, tearing through my heart. Her eyes met mine and I saw pure hatred rest there. I was the cause of this. I was the reason her sister, and soon her as well, were dead.

My fault.

Bang!

She fell too. The last thing in her eyes was hatred towards me. I couldn't stop the tears falling down my cheeks as Portia cried into my shoulder. The Capitol clapped.

Those monsters clapped for their death. I couldn't believe it. Snow nodded his head at someone, who I don't know. But he points to Portia.

No.

She stands, removing her black jacket and glasses, handing them to me. Her eyes tell me so many things, things she can't say, and things she wants to say.

I'm sorry. Be safe. Live life. Survive. Escape. Find help. Remember me. I love you. Take care. I'll miss you. Don't cry. My children, they are safe. Find her.

Bang.

The shot. She falls. I hadn't seen her move, locked in her all telling gaze. But now she was gone. The sobs wrack at me, but I keep them in. I have my hand clenching her jacket and glasses.

I will keep them, I decide with a small nod. For her. She won't be forgotten, not by me. People cheer, cry out with joy.

The Capitol has rid itself of rebels. They are safe. They have it all perfectly fine.

But little did they know, the biggest threat still stood. On that stage. With more control than anyone else.

~*`*'*~

The cell was clean when I reentered it. No one was in it. The chip was still in my ear, and they cuff my hands above my head, forcing me to the ground so I couldn't stand up. I struggled for a little but, it was an odd and uncomfortable, the cuffs digging harshly into my wrists.

Johanna wasn't here. I looked around the room, but there was no sign of her. The grey room had light spilling in from the windows high over my head, but bars covered them. The door they closed had bars too, but it was too far away to bring any light to my side of the cell.

I fidgeted for a while, trying to get comfortable, but I realized that would be like trying to escape. I sighed, my head pounding. Portia's jacket was in my lap, along with her glasses.

It was the only thing I had left from my old life. The jacket she used to always wear, which now I think was Cinna's being it was too big for her, and the glasses that I never saw her without.

I closed my eyes, trying to fall asleep and soon it takes me.

Tentic, Gem, and Kem stood over me, rubbing my face with horrible chemicals. I could hear the snipping of scissors as they cut my hair. They aimless chatter went around me, and I was able to smile at their words.

I start chattering with them, about the stupidest things. Music chip malfunctions. Fresh sea food. New medicines.

"Portia!" I hear them all chime. I sit up glancing over. Her face breaks into a smile so bright I feel my heart falter. She's ok, she's happy.

"Peeta, how are you?" She asks. I get up and hug her, rapping her in my arms. She giggles as I spin her around. I laugh too, happy to have her smile again.

I place my hands on her shoulders, pushing her back so I can look at her. Her hair is platinum blonde, her natural color I believe. Her skin was pale, but freckles covered her cheeks and nose. Her eyes were a bright green behind her black glasses. She was happy.

I turned to face my team and notice something is wrong. There smiles still rest on their features, but its changed. Its gruesome.

They have a dark fog surrounding them. It covers there brightness that I had seen only moments before. Their eyes were pale white, glossed over.

Dead.

Lost.

Gone.

I push Portia behind me, and I see a tall form coming from behind them. It's a familiar person, there brown hair a little too long and their clothes to tattered. His face is bleak but when he extends his hand, Portia bursts past me, into his arms.

When she turns, I see she looks the same as the others.

"No," I stumble back. I try to go as fast as I can to get away from them. But I can't take my eyes off of them. They enthrall me, and lock me with their horrible predatory gaze.

I hear a click. It's a strange sound; I don't know where it came from. Behind me. I glance back, just as an arrow pierces Tentic's temple. He falls.

Jem goes down next, the arrow in her chest. Kem with the arrow in her throat. I stare with fear as the arrow enters Portia's chest. Then Cinna's.

"No!" I screamed. I turned to see the assassin. I heard words being whispered in my ears as I looked her over.

"Her fault. She killed them. Her fault. She will kill you too," Over and over. The words tore at me. The face was familiar in to many ways. How it smiled. How it cried. Shock. Fear. Anger.

I had seen every emotion on that face. And now it was pure death. Her eyes locked with mine, the bow raised, and the arrow whorled from the string, pinpointed at my heart.

"PEETA!" The voice pulled me from my trance. I looked up my head dizzy my heart pounding. Johanna was leaning over me, eyes wide with fear. Her hair was short, almost a guy's cut, and she seemed to have some sorta of insanity as she collapsed over me.

"Jo, it's ok," I croak out.

"No! Peeta! You weren't moving! I thought you were dead!" She cried.

"Jo, I wouldn't die," I tell her.

"You can't control if you live or die. They do!" She sobs.

"I won't let them kill me," I inform her with a strong voice.

"Ok," She whispers, curling up next to me. I move my arms a little but there still locked above my head. Portia's stuff still rests in my lap. The chip was still in my ear.

"Jo?" I ask.

"Yeah?" She sits up.

"Pull that thing out of my ear will you?" I ask. She sits up and sees what I mean. Lightly she tugs it out. "Thanks."

"No problem," She smiles a little. Laying back down, she closes her eyes and goes stiff. I lean back, not able to fall back asleep. I look around the room, for something anything.

I pull memories forward, trying to escape every piece of darkness in the cell.

Katniss singing. Katniss smiling. Laughing. Crying. Hugging me. How she felt those, now, short nights.

I must sit and think like this for hours. The door opens. I glance up and gasp. Jo sits up next to me. She gives a sad look and I can't help but mouth 'I'm Sorry.' As she's shoved in. She just stands there, then runs over, collapsing next to us. Johanna comes over, holding her head on her lap, stroking her long brown hair.

"Shh, shh, It's ok Annie, it's ok,"