The Jean Genie

Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½ or any other manga, anime, or other pre-existing setting that may crop up..

Warning: There will be some OOC. It is an AU though, so that can almost be expected.

I'm starting to worry about the kid. She's not recovering anymore. Everyone else is up and about. Well, mostly up and about. Still not fit to fight. But at least they can move under their own power. But Saturn is still unconscious. And when I check her chi flows I'm alarmed by what I find. If I can't figure this out, she might die. If only there was someone I could talk with. Someone who knew more about this whole 'goddess' thing.

At least Tokyo is being kept safe. I wonder what the city thinks of my current champions? Ryoga I know hasn't been back in a couple weeks. Must still be lost. Since Akane lacks the skill to defend against such monsters, I gifted her with armor capable of protecting her. Of course it doesn't exactly look like armor. More like a bikini. But hay, it's not like anyone will recognize Thong Maiden as Akane Tendo.

Thong maiden, that's funny. The media got one look at her armor, and that's what they dubbed her. Well, initially the camera man had called her 'hammer wielding bimbo'. He's in the hospital now. Coincidentally, the armor didn't fully protect her from the next attack by the bull dozier monster. Sure it protects her. But it's also for another reason. My fiance really needs to get over her 'pervert bashing' behavior.

I figure if the majority of her damage resistance vanishes after assaulting an innocent for unjust reasons, the girl will learn her lesson. Shampoo also needed some sort of protection. Skilled she might be, but the girl can't take a hit. Then there's that curse of hers. It's a major weakness in battle. Shampoo also needs a lesson in respecting men. So what better way to deal with all the issues then modifying her cursed form while serving as my champion?

So when the bracelet I granted her is activated she becomes a male werecat. But it can only be used to fight monsters. I had originally chosen Mousse as a champion too. But the blind duck ruined that choice. First time he tried facing a monster, he threw daggers at children instead. Not just once or twice either. But eight times. I don't care how blind you are. How do you confuse six year old children for a fifteen foot tall monster? It doesn't make any sense. I wont have a champion that reckless.

I'd sent in Kuno too. That was... not very effective. I'm not sure why the monsters always look female in that area. But bokken for brains had made his usual 'I will date you' speech and attacked. Then he started ranting about Mousse stealing away his 'yellow hued beauty'. At least he stopped claiming I'm a foul sorcerer. Now he's absolutely convinced Mousse is the one enslaving his 'loves'. It's kind of funny I guess. The idiot went from ranting about a 'foul sorcerer' to ranting about a 'fowl sorcerer'.

But my thoughts are wandering. There's only one person I know who might be able to help Saturn. The question is, can I trust her? I turn back towards the palace and start to walk. I'll need to contact the old mummy I guess. Up ahead I can feel a massive buildup of raw magic. Something major is about to happen, I can tell.

Nabiki

When the phone rings I'm cleaning the tables. Warrior Shampoo had just flipped the sign on the door to read 'closed'. With the last of today's customers gone, the shift is almost over. They wont train me, and have me sleep in an unused closet. But at least there's a roof over my head. That Tendo girl came by again today. I wish I could remember how I know her. Am I being punished? Maybe, but for what?

It seems unbelievable that I would do anything to harm my benefactors. The voice I'd heard sounded like mine. But why would I ever do anything like that? Since my thoughts are going around in endless circles, I try to leave them be. There's work to be done after all. It's not that I mind my place here. It's the only life I know after all. But sometimes I wonder; why is the blind duck-boy treated with more respect then me?

They express things ranging from disappointment to outright hatred of Mister Mousse. Yet he still receives more respect then I do. Is it related to something I can't remember? If so, what can I do about it? Nothing, that's what. I owe these people everything. Putting up with their disrespect is the least I can do. Elder is still talking on the phone when I finish my cleaning. Wonder who called? Oh well.

"I'll do my best great grandson," the Elder says to the other person. "Where are you?"

I hear a splash coming from the kitchen. When I look over from where I store the mop there's a really cute red haired girl carrying a child with violet hair. What really shocks me is where the two came from. They just stepped out of the dish water. I take in the red head's blue body suit and red robe. If I didn't know any better, I'd swear I know her. The girl looks tantalizingly familiar. But I can't quite place from where.

She looks me over and raises an eyebrow. "Hello Nabs, I heard you got in trouble with the old ghoul."

That voice, I know it. I know I know it. Worry starts to overcome me when the Elder falls off her staff. She never falls. Yet Elder Cologne seems shocked about something. The new girl also seems surprised by something. She bows respectfully to Elder. This too appears to be a shock. But what really catches my attention is the child in her arms. Something about this child scares me badly.

"I need your help, priestess. Something is preventing Saturn from healing, and my powers can't help her."

Elder nearly falls over a second time before answering. "Not for three centuries, great grandson. But how did you know I was once Hera's priestess?"

The red haired girl carefully laid her charge on a table. "Of course I know. I can see the connection to your patron. From what I can sense, I think she's disappointed in you. But you are ignoring the issue at hand. Can you help Saturn?"

Elder seems to finally notice me. Since she shoos me out of the room, it's clear this is not something I am allowed to see. Why doesn't Elder Cologne trust me? I do everything she tells me to. I'm loyal, so why the distrust?

Sailor Moon

I wanna go home, I whine. Being in the palace was exciting at first. Well, okay it wasn't really. But after a few days it was kinda fun. But I miss mom and dad. And I don't understand why the others are still hurt. Ranko says everyone should be better in a week. But I wanna go home now. Being here makes me remember things. Painful things. I don't want to remember them, it hurts too much.

My friends are starting to feel the same way. Mina-chan has a haunted look these days. Whenever she looks at me, Mina-chan starts to cry. I'm afraid if I stay here much longer, I'll remember why she does that. This place has ghosts. Maybe not soup or natural ghosts, but still real ones When I put on one of my past self's dresses, I can almost feel myself dancing with someone.

Even Setsuna seems haunted by the past. Why, just the other day I saw her crying. She never does that. Get drunk maybe, but never cry. When we talked, Setsuna told me the time gate never showed the monster that nearly killed us. Or anything that happened since that day. It's almost like the monster had just appeared out of nowhere. When I jokingly asked if anyone had wished for more challenges, Hakura looked a little pale.

Still haven't gotten a chance to ask her about that.

Jeanie

My current task is proving really hard. Probably the hardest one ever given to me. I'm suppose to heal the ecosystems of entire solar system. Yet to do that, I have to know what's wrong with them. The various moons as I recall never supported life on their own. Which means I have to learn how it was allowed, and what happened. Some of what I need to know can be found in the palace on the moon. But not everything.

I'm also unsure if Master knows what the consequences of her wish will be. Since man's technology is the source of environmental damage on earth, her wish will involve it's removal. People are going to die, lots of people. From my history classes I know the world had descended into total chaos shortly before the ice came. What isn't clear is why the ice came when it did.

Since I'm still researching the other planets, I decide to start with earth. While it's within my power to completely rewrite the laws of physics, that's not what I'm after. Changing things enough to stop technology from working is easy enough. The hard part will be making sure no one dies when that happens. But how? Hmm, petroleum is an easy part. Alter it's properties a little, and it no longer burns. This alone will prevent much of the air pollution. But not all of it.

Changing fissionable materials on the planet into inert matter is trickier. A single misstep and they could go off. Or who knows what else might happen. I also have to be careful not to release any radiation during the conversion. Coal I intend to mostly leave alone. Just make sure it burns cleaner. Another hurdle is how fast to change things. I can't alter the entire world at once. Even I'm not that powerful. But an ever expanding energy wall, that I can do.

As I begin the incantation I hope nothing goes wrong. Runes form in the air. As they take shape I can feel the buildup of magic on earth. With the final rune almost completed, I start to sweat. This is the hardest part of ritual magic. They always take hours, and a lot of concentration. So by the end of a spell it's easy to slip up. Just as the last thread of power is settling into place something knocks me over.

I really hope the spell finished before I got distracted.

To be continued

Not as long as previous chapters, I know. I have another chapter or two planned for this at minimum. Next chapter will probably be rather serious too. Then I should hopefully get back to the funny.

Response to the recent comments about what Jeanie is attempting: Remember that Jeanie is not from the 20th century. When she was born there was no nuclear power. And her knowledge of natural sciences isn't really complete. Nor is her knowledge of modern technology. So yes, there will be problems as a direct result of her action. Not entirely her fault either. A careless wish without thought on the full ramifications is also to blame.