Disclaimer: I do not own Blood and Chocolate, nor any of the characters. This is strictly fan written.

Well enjoy.

-Jane

She threw her clothes into her bag, her eyes blurred and her lip quivering. She wouldn't cry, moon be damned, she refused to cry! She was going back to the little apartment that she used to share with her mother. She wasn't going to stay here, she would leave, be gone. Just like her mother...

She stopped cold. She didn't want to be like her mother. She couldn't abandon everything like that, forget to live and die before her body. She didn't want to be her mother. Her mother was a monster who drained her victims of the love and compassion they once had for her.

She clutched the shirt in her hand and felt her heart beat slow. No, she couldn't leave like that, she had to do Vivian's cake, she had to at least spend time with Rudy. She at least had to say good bye.

She covered her face and sat down on the bed, the soft plush of it devouring her and surrounding her like soft clouds. She was her mother, she was. She left her husband, she let down her family, she hurt them, and now she was running from them because she couldn't face her inner demons. She was her mother.

When the inn burned down, her mother made her go with her, leaving Rudy high and dry and with the questions that Bucky asked her. When they settled down she didn't do anything, refusing to work or even take care of herself. Ava had to get a job at the local bakery, which she had minimal experience, and make sure her mother ate that day. Ava knew she was going to die, it was obvious. That is why Ava left with her mother; she couldn't live with herself if her mother died alone like that. She ate Ava alive and after a while Ava wondered if she even lived.

"I hate her..." Ava whispered between her fingers and she almost retched when the smell from the vanity reached her nostrils. She didn't want to admit it, but she had always hated her mother.

She heard a knock at her door and her hands dropped from her face in surprise. She wasn't going to answer it, the knock was just to be polite. She was right because seconds later the door opened and Rudy popped his head in. "Are you hun- what are you doing?"

She kept staring at him, not saying anything. He shut the door behind him and walked over to the bed, looking at the mess of clothes. "What are you doing baby?"

Her lip trembled. She was an adult damn it, she was not going to cry to daddy about her problems. But she found it harder when he looked at her with sad eyes. She began to sob and covered her face, not even trying to contain the tears. "I am like mom."

Rudy sat next to his daughter and held her to him, patting her back and trying to comfort her. "No, Ava, you are nothing like her. Not at all."

She cried into his chest and clung to him. "Yes I am! I left Bucky like mom left you and I can't even tell him why I won't come home. I just left my family because I had no spine." Her words were broken up by her sobs and tears. Rudy's shirt was starting to get wet.

"No, no sweat heart. You left because you wanted to make your mother happy. You are as much as a victim as the rest of us." Her stroked her hair and sighed. "Ava, I loved your mother, very much, even after leaving with my baby. I know...I know that she is no longer with us but if she was alive and she came back, I would forgive her."

Ava sat up and looked at her father with wide eyes, her mouth open. "Why daddy, why would you do that?" She whispered. She didn't have a memory of her parents ever being in love or her mother ever telling her father that she loved him.

He smiled sadly and kissed her forehead, patting her shoulder and getting up, walking slowly towards the door. "The same reason that Bucky keeps chasing you." He put his hand on the door handle and looked at her. "I know you have some things to figure out and maybe a marriage is just not in the cards right now, but I know, for certain, you are in love and that is a good enough reason to stay home this time."

She watched him leave and felt the weight of his words pull her down into the bed. He loved her mother, just like Bucky loved her.

She had a lot of thinking to do.

Midnight was quiet, strangely enough. Even the soft music and the clanging of pans didn't seem to break the silence. The sticky heat was now just fading away and with the kitchen's screen door open and letting out the even hotter air. The flour and anything else that stuck to the skin made a strange paste on Ava's chest. She was starting not to sweat so much and she was happy that she had found a fan in one of the utility closets.

Cupcakes littered every space in the kitchen. It was a large, decked in chrome type, like what you'd see in a restaurant. It was nothing like what would be in a home, unless Martha Stewart and Rachel Ray got married and had a house. She was finishing with the frosting and making the tiny flowers, made out of fondant, and was about to put them on the cupcakes. She had one specially set out for Vivian. She would show her cousin that she could bake. That little punk.

Talking to her dad actually inspired Ava to quit her crying and deal with her life. While making cupcakes, she had thought over many things and actually came up with many solutions. Even the issue with Bucky. No one would be happy, but she had to do what was right for herself, not what everyone wanted.

"That is the most cupcakes I have seen in my life." She heard from the screen door. She turned to see Vivian standing there with wide eyes and a slight smile. "More than I asked for."

"I felt challenged." Ava mumbled and blew a hair out of her face. Her cousin smelt like the woods. "They will be done by morning and we will freeze them so they stay good. I am doing the cake tomorrow."

Vivian walked around looking at the cupcakes, her smile growing fond. "You really did it."

Ava turned and grabbed the one she set aside for Vivian. It was completely finished and ready to eat. "Well, try it first." She raised her eyebrows. "They might taste like shit you know."

Vivian took it and examined it, like it was a science project. Finally she peeled away the cupcake wrapper and bit into it, receiving a mouth full of spongy and heavy cake. Ava watched carefully as her cousin chewed and then leaned back on one leg. "Moon...I owe you one, seriously."

Ava smiled and shrugged. "I actually think that by making you those cupcakes, I can start reversing my wrong that I did toward my family."

Vivian kept on with the cupcake, watching Ava with thoughtful eyes. "You didn't hurt me, you hurt my mom, dad, and uncle." She looked down and sighed. "I just...I am getting scared and that doesn't happen often, so don't think me weak." She sent a quick glare at Ava, who shrugged and rolled her eyes.

"Why are you scared? Wedding jitters?" Ava bent over again to continue placing flowers on the cupcakes.

"I don't want to be like your mom...or like you and Bucky."

Ava stopped and turned towards her cousin, her face pinched. "Me and Bucky?" She set down her tool and placed her hands on her hips. "What do you mean like me and Bucky?"

Vivian sighed and sat down in one of the chairs placed by the wall. "You were so in love with him and then, poof, it changed. I don't want to wake up one morning and not love Gabriel any more. I can't even imagine doing that."

Ava crossed her arms. "You don't think I love Bucky?"

"You don't act like you do. You left divorce papers on the table with your ring and a note saying you didn't feel the same any more." Vivian scoffed and shook her head and closed her eyes. "He actually ran out of the house and went looking for you."

Ava looked away and bit her lip. She did do that, but she couldn't let her past drag her back like that. "I love him. I love him so much it made me stupid." She dropped her arms. "You are not like me and my mom...you are the complete opposite of what she was. Don't let that stop you. You are you, I am me. Our lives are not going to be the same. Get married and quit bitching about cupcakes."

Vivian frowned and tilted her head. "You know...fuck you, but that actually helped."

Ava shrugged and looked away. "I do what I can."

They remained silent after a while. Her cousin barely moved and any movement she did make was with her face, like she was arguing with herself and losing...Ava wanted to ask if she was going to be ok, but then Vivian got up and began to help her with placing flowers on the cupcakes, studying the ones that Ava did and copying them. Ava wanted to tell her to go sit down and leave it to her, but then again...it was nice to have silent company.

It took a couple of hours for them to finish, but finally, with sighs of relief, they were done. Vivian smiled and looked content with herself. "That was fun, but tedious."

"I still have a cake to do." Ava started taking treys to the freezers. "And then your mother wants me to go dress shopping and blah blah blah. You need to stop getting married, its making me break out."

"I'll work on that." Vivian rolled her eyes.

She didn't want to admit it, but watching her former mate run towards the inn with out a shirt and no pants, excited her. He was smeared with sweat, dirt, and leave were planted firmly in his hair. She stayed near the porch as he passed by, not saying one word to her, to retrieve his clothes. She felt guilty, making him like that, but she knew he probably didn't want to talk. She had yet to change from her flour covered clothes and wash off the mess on her skin.

"You smell awful." She heard him say and she nodded in agreement.

"Sure do." She looked at her hands. Even her nails were completely caked.

He had found his jeans and had his shirt in his hands. "Baking again? I thought you were gonna wait to do that." He buttoned his jeans and shook his head, trying to release the leaves that were stuck.

"I needed to think." She shrugged and looked away from him.

He copied her and shrugged, pulling on his shirt and turned to walk towards the surrounding buildings. She felt sad that was all he say to her. She deserved it though, it was what she asked for.

"I heard you have a house?" Ava asked, before he was out of reach. It worked, because he turned around, looking at her with surprise.

"Yup." He nodded, sticking his hands into his pockets. "Why?"

She looked back at the door and then at him. "Can I see it?"

He was thinking hard about it. Really hard. Ava wondered if he just hated her now or if he was just acting this way so she would think he was hurt again. Maybe he finally realized that chasing after her would be pointless. He stroked his chin and his brows knitted close together. "I suppose." He didn't sound so sure.

She walked up next to him and he started to walk back the direction he was heading. His shoulders were slumped and he walked quickly. Ava had to walk swiftly to keep up with him.

His house was the biggest one in the small group of houses. It had a wrap around porch, just like the inn and it was painted a light cream color. She remembered driving around in Maryland and every time he'd see a colored house he'd shake his head and ask if people really thought it looked good. She wanted a blue house, but he would have never gone for it.

It was very modern, despite the other buildings around them. When he opened the door she could smell the dust and oak. He wasn't messy, he just didn't know how to clean. He would fold his clothes, put them away, if some one else washed them for him. He always ended up bleaching things he wasn't supposed to.

She followed him inside and even in the dark she could see how empty it was. He flipped on the light and went straight to the kitchen, retrieving himself a beer. She stayed in what was supposed to be the entry/ living room, but there was only a t.v. on the floor and a lawn chair. Simple man. The walls inside were nothing like the outside of the house. It was colorful and tasteful. They were pale colors so it wasn't over baring.

"I am building the furniture. I have to finish making bed frames for the inn and then I will be able to work on it more." He walked by her and sat in the lawn chair, taking a chug of beer. He looked at her and pointed behind him. "If you want to see it the rest is back there."

She made a face and bit the inside of her cheek. Maybe he was to tired to care. It was close to dawn. Soon, she would have to succumb to her body's needs. She turned from him and walked on the plush carpet toward the hallway, passing a dinning room. This place defiantly smelled of him.

She passed a bathroom, that was still missing tile, but she could see the small, neat pile of the rest, patiently waiting by the tub, which was also impressive. It was like what was in the inn, only, a little more modern. She moved on to find a spare bedroom, filled with meaningless things. Across from that room, was Bucky's. It had a large, unmade bed and a dresser that was just as intimidating and made of very dark and polished wood. The sheets on the bed, she knew were not cheap and she like that he wasn't a stereotypical guy and didn't go for black. The dark blue was very fitting.

She suddenly felt the urge to clean. She had yet to be worn out and she doubted that Bucky would get all huffy and puffy about her touching his things. She once shared them.

She made the bed, gathered the laundry, and moved his nasty work boots out by the door. She found an old sock and some Windex. There was nothing to dust with so she made due with the sock and Windex. After his room, she moved on to the bathroom, and after that, she went out to the living room and picked up dishes that were laying around. He finally looked away from his t.v. to see what she was doing. "Avie, what the hell are you doing woman?"

"Cleaning this beautiful house. It smells like nasty man in here." She kicked a pair of boxers down the hallway. Men had no shame when it came to their personal space.

"Baby, I am a nasty man. Now stop it, you are going to starve my pet mice." He sighed and watched her pick up garbage.

"I don't remember you being this gross." She muttered and walked into the kitchen. She turned on the water hot and pulled the drain. Okay, maybe he was a little bit dirty, but, she gave him props for not having rotten food every where. The water also helped wash off the mess on her arms.

After a while, she began to feel tired and after the last dish was washes, she almost couldn't stand. Maybe she didn't know she was that tired. She stretched and yawned, walking slowly to the door.

"You don't have to go. I'm not sleeping, you can have the bed." He said to her as she reached the door.

She shook her head and rubbed her eyes. "My dad will look for me." She mumbled. She felt like a little kid who was past her bed time.

"You are 21 for moon's sake, he won't be looking for you." He set down his beer and left his 'comfortable' chair. He stood in front of her and tilted his head. "Unless you are scared you'll wake up in the morning with my hand down your pants."

She rolled her burning eyes and shook her head. "Oh, yes, I am terrified that you will ruin my purity." She stumbled slightly and caught herself. Bed, bed.

He couldn't stand it any more and finally bent down and picked her up. She squealed and wrapped her arms around his neck. She hated being picked up and he knew it. He chuckled and walked back towards the bedroom, ignoring her slurred protests. When he sat her down on the bed, she went silent. It was extremely comfortable, he made sure that he had the best bed he could find.

He slipped off her shoes and pulled back the blankets, laughing when she dove into a spot and nuzzled his pillow. "Hey Bucky..." She asked quietly.

He pulled the blankets over her and sat down on the bed, setting his hand on the small of her back. "What?"

She frowned. What was she going to say? What did she want at that moment? What was she going to achieve? "I really, really, really do love you. More than you know."

He was silent, not sure how to respond to her. She loved him. Yeah, he knew. He loved her and she knew that too. Then why did she want so badly to be rid of him? "Then stay home. Stay with me and don't go any where every again."

She clutched the pillow and clenched her eyes close together. Vivian said she was scared and she was still getting married. Her dad still loved her mom. "Not yet."

He looked away and she felt her heart go into her stomach. It made her sick to see him like this. "When?"

She thought for a moment and stared off into the darkness. She didn't know and she didn't know if she ever would. She touched his hand and felt over the calloused knuckles. "When I howl at the full moon again. I am here now, isn't that enough?"

"You don't want to spend time with me unless you feel you need to." He didn't look at her. "Why should I be happy about that?"

She retracted her hand and clutched at the pillow again. "That I am laying in you bed, talking to you, still in love with you."

He looked at her, like she had never seen before. She was a different person, some one he did not know and she felt sorry for him that he had to endure her. He kept staring at her, until he knew she was asleep. He stroked her hair and then ran his thumb over her lips. He missed those lips.

He held his head in his hands and sat there till the sun began to peak through the curtains. "What am I doing?"

I feel that maybe this story is a little dull, but I wasn't really going for another rambunctious love story, I wanted something softer, not sure if I am succeeding...