A/N: I was sitting here working on the next chapter of "Where do we go from here?" and suddenly it hit me that I hadn't written a Christmas fic yet so I cranked this out in a few hours. It takes place shortly after "Joy to the World." I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

It was a very cold and dark outside when Lisa Cuddy finally arrived home on Christmas Eve. She was completely exhausted and ready to begin her vacation. She'd spent the last few days wrapping up hospital business so she could enjoy the week off between Christmas and the New Year but then the baby had come along and changed everything. Her schedule had been full not only with work but preparing for the arrival of her new foster child. She hung her coat inside the door and threw her keys and purse on the coffee table. She trudged down the hall to her bedroom, kicked off her heels and stripped down completely, grabbing her favorite plush robe and heading to the bathroom. Suddenly she heard a very loud and familiar tapping on her front door.

"Oh God," she groaned, hanging her head. "Not tonight." Cuddy contemplated not answering the door. Of all nights, this was not the night she wanted to be insulted and berated by the misanthropic diagnostician. The tapping continued and she sighed as she slipped the robe over her naked body, tied it loosely and padded towards the front door. She took a deep breath and opened the door. The cold air hit her like an arctic blast and her skin was chilled to the core underneath her robe.

"House, what do you want?" She asked, staring into his eyes. She was taken aback by the color and clarity. They were bluer than she'd seen them in a long time and they seemed clearer and focused than they had in days.

"Can I come in?" He asked.

"I was just getting ready to jump in the shower," she said holding her robe tightly to her.

"Guess I arrived at the right time eh?" He asked with a lecherous grin as he looked her up and down.

Cuddy started to close the door when he blocked it with his cane.

"Cuddy, wait. I'm sorry."

Cuddy was taken by surprise at his sudden apology. "What?"

"I know it's been a hard past few days for you, I'm not here to piss you off or anything."

"Well then why are you here?"

"First, let me in, it's cold out here."

Cuddy moved aside as House limped in. She noticed his limp was more pronounced and knowing how harsh the cold was on his leg, she wanted him to be comfortable.

"Go ahead and take your coat off. Do you want something to drink?"

"Coffee?"

"Really? No booze?"

"Not tonight," he said. "Listen why don't you go take a shower? I'll make us a pot."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, the coffee's in the-"

"I know where it is."

"You do?" She rolled her eyes. "Oh I forgot how many times you've broken into my house. Have at it," she said walking down the hall. He watched her walk away in the robe, wondering what she had on under it if anything.

Cuddy stood in the shower, letting the hot water flow over her sore muscles. She washed her hair and then lathered herself up in her favorite body wash. She smiled, taking in the scents of the strawberry and vanilla which made her feel a bit more awake and invigorated. She was just about to lose herself in the shower when she remembered the man in her kitchen, making a pot of coffee. A chill ran up her spine thinking about him. Why is he here? She wondered. The last they'd spoken was at the hospital the day before when they stood together looking at the baby in the NICU and she'd informed him she applied to be a foster parent and wanted to adopt the baby. He'd wished her a Merry Christmas and then left. She had missed his presence too, which had happened more often over the last few months. There was something between them but neither could admit it. Then they had kissed and things became awkward. It was fine to be friends, if that's what they could call it, but anything more jeopardized everything—their working relationship and any friendship they had. She had a feeling any chance they had for something was gone forever with her decision to adopt the baby. With a heavy sigh, she rinsed off and then stepped out of the shower, wrapping herself in a thick towel. She wondered how much snooping he'd managed to do in her house and smiled to herself that it didn't even bother her if he snooped. She didn't mind House knowing everything about her. If that's true, she thought to herself, why can't I just tell him how I feel? She stood in front of her bathroom mirror towel drying her hair, thinking of the scruffy blue-eyed man in the other room.

While Cuddy was in the shower, House puttered around her kitchen, grinding beans and making a pot of coffee. He knew how overwhelmed she'd been lately and as tired as she looked, he figured she hadn't been eating right. Wanting to do something nice for her, he searched through her freezer for any leftovers he could reheat but there were none. He picked up his phone and dialed a number he knew by heart, the best New York Style Chinese take-out in the city. He knew Cuddy loved Chinese food and ordered the combo he knew was her favorite and followed it with something for himself. After giving them his credit card number, he hung up with a satisfied smirk.

As he waited for the food to arrive, the coffee to brew and Cuddy to make her appearance again, he wandered around her living room. He was already very familiar with her house but he never got tired of looking around at her things. Her home was furnished comfortably in warm earth tones and she had the most amazing collection of books. He perused some of them, running his fingers over the spines. He pulled a few out and flipped through them, smiling as he thought of Cuddy, sitting on her couch, a glass of wine on the table next to her, reading in front of a roaring fire on a cold winter night. She spent so much time at the hospital he couldn't even imagine she found time to read. And now she's adopting a kid, he thought. She's never gonna have time to read, or do anything else. Suddenly he felt a little sad. As he put the book back on the shelf he thought about the fact that between the hospital and the baby she probably wouldn't have time for him anymore. He'd never tell her this but the only reason he didn't want her to adopt was because he didn't want to lose his place in her life. They spent a fair amount of time around each other and now that would change. He hated change especially one that would take her away from him. Wait a minute, she's not mine to begin with but damnit I love it when she's around, even when she's nagging me and being a pain in the ass. House would never tell Cuddy but he always felt less miserable and even somewhat happy when she was near him. He'd perfected the art of disguising his desire to be near her by causing trouble and needing her to sign off on procedures. Most of the things he went to her about were ridiculous, but he'd get to see her and that's all that mattered.

Cuddy padded into the living room wearing comfy socks, a pair of sweatpants and a v-neck sweater. Her hair was pulled back into a loose ponytail. She wasn't prepared for the sight that lay before her. The lights were down low, the smell of coffee and the new Burberry candle she'd picked up at the store recently. A warm and cozy fire lit up the room nicely. She smiled wide at the thought that House had done all this for her. She looked around but there was no sign of him and she frowned thinking he'd left. Her eyes caught sight of his jacket lying over the back of the couch and her heart skipped a beat knowing he was still there. She heard him in the kitchen and as she made her way there, she heard the doorbell.

"Hey Cuddy, can you get that? I'm kinda busy." He yelled.

Cuddy answered the door and the delivery boy from the local Chinese Restaurant handed her two bags. Knowing House always expected others to pay for his food, she asked the delivery boy to wait while she got her wallet.

"No ma'am, the order's already been paid."

"Well let me get your tip."

"No, really, that's been paid too. Merry Christmas," he said turning around and walking through he light snow back to his car.

"Merry Christmas," she called back to him before closing the door.

At that moment, House entered the room. Noting she was looking at the bags curiously, he said, "I thought you might be hungry, you haven't eaten much lately have you?"

She nodded her head. "I am starving and you're right, I've just been so busy."

"Shall we?" He motioned to the couch. "I take it you never eat in here but I think we can make an exception just one night." Without a word, she walked towards the couch and took a seat on it, spreading the food out on the coffee table. She patted the seat next to her and House sat down.

As Cuddy pulled the food out of the bags she smiled and shook her head. "You don't miss a trick do you?"

"I know what you like."

"You sure do," she said opening the bag of spring rolls. "Thanks for dinner."

"You're welcome."

They ate quietly for a few minutes, each comfortable in their respective silence. It was as if they did that routine every evening. Finally Cuddy's curiosity got the best of her. She set down her fork and looked at him.

"House, this is really nice."

"You needed to relax."

Taken back by his consideration of her she asked, "So why are you here?"

"What? I can't do something nice for you?"

She rolled her eyes at him.

"Okay, out of character for me but…you've been so busy lately and it's Christmas Eve and…nobody should be alone."

"I don't even celebrate Christmas."

"Oh yeah, I forgot."

"You don't forget anything. " She tilted her head and pursed her lips together. "Are you okay?"

"Fine."

"How's your leg?"

"Hurts a little more with the cold but its okay."

"I worry about you."

"Why's that?"

She sighed. "I know this time of year…you're always alone, it's cold and your leg hurts and I hate seeing you take more pills."

"I like being alone and I'm not taking more pills."

"Nobody likes being alone," she said. Realizing what he said about the pills, she responded. "You're really not taking more pills?"

"Trying not to."

"I know it's hard."

"You have no idea."

"I do. Listen, House—"

"Cuddy, why do you care so much?"

"I just do."

"Is it because I'm your best doctor?"

"Maybe."

"Liar."

"Okay fine, I care about what happens to you, as if you didn't already know."

He smiled smugly.

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Do you…care… about me?"

House blushed a little and sat back in the couch. "You know me; I'm a heartless bastard who doesn't give a damn about anyone."

Cuddy frowned. So much for a straight answer. "We're not at the hospital; I'm not Wilson or your team or anyone else. This is me; I've known you since my freshman year in college. If you can't trust me—"

"It's not that I don't trust you."

"Then what?"

"It's that I do."

"You do?"

He leaned forward, head in his hands, rubbing his scruff. "Cuddy, it's because I care that I can't talk to you."

"So you can do nice things for me? Like this?" she motioned around the room to the food and the fire. "Like my desk? But you can't just talk to me?"

He looked up at her. "You noticed?"

"How could I not?"

"But you never said anything."

"For crissakes, it seems like every time I think we're in sync, I'm wrong. I went to your office to thank you and…" she trailed off not wanting to relive the embarrassing moment when she caught the trashy blonde in his office flirting with him.

"And what?"

"It's nothing."

"No, tell me. What is it?"

"I went to your office to thank you and I found you in there with that…that…girl."

House looked as if he'd had an epiphany. "Oh shit, you mean Dee Dee?"

"Oh, Dee Dee?" She asked mocking him.

"I hired her—"

"No, don't wanna hear it," she said putting her hands up in the air.

"You're going to hear it because I hired her to play a trick on Taub and Kutner. They'd opened a website and doing diagnoses under my name. I just wanted to teach them a lesson and hired her as a patient they'd inaccurately diagnosed."

"On the level?"

He crossed his heart. "Scout's honor."

She smiled wide. "Thanks for the desk."

He smiled back. "You're welcome."

They both picked up their dinners and began eating again.

"So, when do you bring the kid home?" He asked trying to act uninterested.

"In a few days."

"You sure you're up to this?"

She stopped eating for a moment. "If you're going to sit there and berate my mothering abilities you can leave—"

"No, I'm not. I just know how busy you are with the hospital and…everything."

"I've thought a lot about it. You of all people…know I've wanted a baby."

"I thought you'd given up…before the last time that is."

"I did. But this…her mother's dead, her father is sixteen, her grandparents don't want her. She'll wind up in God knows what kind of home."

"I understand that, but why you?"

"Why not me?"

"Don't answer a question with a question. Why you?"

"I'm lonely."

"It's not a reason to have a child."

"Isn't it?"

"You think a kid's going to fill the void?"

"I don't even know if we should be having this conversation House. You just don't understand."

"You want unconditional love."

"Yeah, I do. But I want to give it as much as receive it."

"Unconditional love doesn't exist."

"What makes you say that?"

"People say they love you and when things go wrong they run away."

Cuddy didn't respond but she had a feeling he was referring to Stacy.

"Well, it's true," he said, interrupting her thoughts.

She put her hand on his arm and he looked down at it. He wasn't used to people touching him but she was the only person he'd let do it.

"House, some people do run but not everyone. I mean, a lot of people stick around, it's the tough times that test their resolve and bring them closer together." She looked into his eyes, trying to convey her message to him, hoping he'd get it.

He looked at her. In her eyes he saw softness, compassion, love. Love. That scared him. Suddenly he said, "I gotta pee," and he got up quickly and limped down the hall.

Cuddy sighed sadly and shook her head. While he was gone she continued eating the rest of her vegetable combo, but she realized she was no longer hungry. She thought they were getting somewhere and then he clammed up. She wasn't ready to give up, not yet. She was trying to tell him something and damnit he was going to get the message or else. She was lost in her thoughts when he sat back down again next to her, a little closer than before.

"Stacy said she loved me and she left," he said quietly.

"It didn't help that you pushed her away."

"Things weren't that great before the infarction, she would have left anyway."

"She just didn't know how to handle everything. It was a rough time for both of you."

"I pushed you away too and yet you came back. Why? I mean I treated you like shit after the surgery, I've harassed you and berated you and I'm the biggest pain in the ass at that hospital. All that and you never gave up on me."

"What does that tell you, House?" She looked up at him, silently pleading for him to see the sincerity in her eyes and hear it in her voice. "He I know we don't always see eye to eye but I'd like to think I know you…better than most…even Wilson. I see things in you others don't see. Even when you don't believe in yourself…I do."

That got House's attention. "But why?"

Cuddy was clearly frustrated. "Why do you have to analyze everything? Why can't you just accept it? It's not something I can explain, it's just something I feel." She added. "I've always felt it."

House felt his face flush at her words. "I should go," he said as started to get up and leave.

She put her hand on his knee and held it firmly. "Please…don't go," she said in a near whisper.

"I'm better off alone."

"Why do you think that?" She implored.

"Because it's true!" He insisted loudly.

"You deserve happiness just like everyone else."

"You don't know that."

"I do," she insisted. "I knew you before you were like this. I remember when you were carefree and knew how to have fun. I miss the old days and I wish you could get at least some of that back."

"That was a long time ago."

"It was. A lot's changed. You take your pain and anger out on everyone. You think if you push them away they'll be better off and so will you." Turning to face him, her hand never leaving his leg she said, "I wish you'd realize it doesn't have to be this way. I know your leg hurts you all the time but even with that pain, you can find some happiness, you can find love."

"Love?" He laughed out loud.

"Yeah."

"Love is overrated."

"No, it's not."

He gave her a slight grin. "Cuddy," he said softly. "It's one of the things I like about you. You always see the good in everything…and everyone."

"I try." She smiled back. "So, how about we get that coffee," she said getting up from the couch.

House picked up the empty food cartons and followed her into the kitchen. He watched her as she prepared the coffee, smirking to himself that she remembered exactly how he liked it. At that moment, he realized that being here, with her, it just felt right. There were only two occasions when his leg didn't hurt as much, the first was when he was in the middle of his puzzles and the second was when he was with her. Without thinking, he moved towards her as she stirred her coffee. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed him staring at her.

"What?" She asked turning to him.

"Just admiring that wide load there," he said sarcastically.

"I should have guessed," she shot back with a chuckle. She walked over to him and handed him his coffee. He took it from her and set it on the counter. He stepped forward into her personal space and put his hands on her arms. He was scared but couldn't stop himself, nor did he want to.

"House—"she said.

"Shh," he said. "I've wanted to do this since the last time." He took her face in his hands and caressed her cheeks with his thumbs. Then he leaned down and gently touched his lips to hers. It was warm and soft and gentle. Cuddy's arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him to her. Their tongues caressed one another passionately. The kiss was slower and deeper than the last one they experienced. They pulled away for air and just stared at each other.

"Cuddy…" he said, his voice trailed off, not knowing exactly what to say next.

"House, please…don't…" She begged him.

"I'm sorry—"

"No, I mean please…don't leave this time."

He buried his nose in her dark curls, taking in the scent of the strawberry shampoo. "Cuddy, you're about to adopt a kid, I'm no father figure, you know that."

"You can be anything you want to be," she pleaded with him.

"I don't know how to be the man you need," he insisted. "I don't know how to change."

She pulled back and looked him in the eyes. "You already are the man I need and as far as change, I just want you to be you. Together, we can work everything else out."

House ran his fingers through her hair. "If we go there…and it doesn't work…I don't want to lose you."

Cuddy reached up and took her his hands in hers. "You'll never lose me. We've waited nearly twenty years for this. I don't think there's anyone else out there who would put up with us like we put up with each other." She chuckled and he smiled at her.

"It's not going to be easy."

"I don't expect it to be."

"I'm going to be a pain in the ass."

"I expect nothing less."

"Kids scare the shit out of me," he admitted.

"Me too," she replied.

He pulled her to him again. "Damnit Cuddy, I don't know how you do it, but you make me want to be a better man."

Cuddy melted into him hearing those words. "I think we do that to each other."

"You want to be a better man too?" He mused.

"No, you ass." She slapped his arm. "You know what I mean."

After a few moments, House heard a sniffle and pulled back a moment and saw the tears. He reached up and gently wiped them from her face. "I'm sorry I made you cry."

"I'm not crying because I'm upset you idiot," she chuckled. "I'm actually happy."

"Do you always cry when you're happy?" He asked, amused.

"No, but then again, I haven't been happy in a long time."

"You deserve to be happy," he said, pulling her close again and kissing the top of her head.

"So do you," she replied, nestling into his chest.

The house was eerily quiet as they stood there in the kitchen holding one another. Finally House spoke out of the blue.

"Coffee's getting cold."

"So it is," she replied quietly.

"Hey Cuddy?"

"Yeah?"

"I really do trust you. It's just...hard to talk sometimes. I'll work on that okay? It'll just take time."

"I know, House, believe me, I know," she replied with all sincerity. She knew it would take time but if they worked together they could do it.

House ran his hands up and down her back, warming her and making her heart flutter.

"Merry Christmas, Cuddy," House said softly as he leaned down to kiss her again.

"Merry Christmas, House." She smiled at him as their lips connected in total bliss.

Hope you enjoyed. Please review!