1)Community : Happy Endings

Chapter 1 : Anthropology classroom, 11:20

"I still can't believe you got me to take this class."
"What can I say - I have that effect on people."
Annie said smugly to Jeff. Jeff snorted and drew the attention of
the teacher - the foreigner, Professor Duncan.
"Oi - Jeffrey Winger! What's so funny, up on that back row?" Jeff almost growled - he hated people calling him Jeffrey. It was so... Uncool.
"Oh, nothing. Jeff was just... Remembering something funny?" Annie pitched up at the end of the sentence, clearly lost for words.
"Yeah - his obscenely high ass crack."
"Hey!" Jeff flicked a bit of rubber at Britta, who turned and glared at him. The study group had claimed the back 2 rows on the right - minus Shirley, who was on leave with her child. The one that Abed delivered. In that very classroom.
"Yeah, blondie." Pierce retorted from the seat next to Annie - the rows were 3 seats long, and the benches tiered - somehow defending Jeff. "Nice jacket."
"Yeah well - nice glasses."
"Okay, students! Namely the Greendale 7, but in general! Let's not reduce Anthropology to what it was last year - drinking, pointless insults (or compliments in your case) and no work. I've been given a warning... After they discovered the CCTV camera in the corner up there."
"Get on with it."
"Gee, okay Jeffrey." Jeff could swear that he knew it drove him up the wall.
"Now - what did the Renaissance guys do that caused a revolution? Anybody?"

"Christ. Annie - why did you make me - sorry us - take that class? It's not even worth anything!"
"Oh Jeff. It'll be fine. It's because we've used the library for 3 years straight - they may start trying to claim it back. We need some way of keeping contact."
"Yeah whatever. In 1 year I'll be back in court. In the good way."
"This group is like the group in Friends. The sexual tension between the guy and the females is really tearing us apart."
"Abed!" Jeff, Britta and Annie chimed, all giving him a disapproving look.
"Yeah - We don't have any sexual tension. Look at us!"
"Oh..." Annie quietly did her Disney face to the floor. One day Jeff would realise. He knew, but not the extent of it. The 10 or so years age difference didn't matter to her.
"Guys. Seriously - there is something between you all. I'm not trying to be an Abed - no offense." Troy grinned at his neutrality.
"None taken."
"Okay- let's get back in business. We've got an Antropology test next week." This led to a collective groan as the group walked into the cafeteria. They all proceeded with the routine - tray, queue, food, sit, eat, argue, leave. Annie 'accidentally' bumped into Jeff as he bent down to pick up his car keys.
"Sorry." Annie gave him a smile - he could never stay mad at her. Even if she claimed she wasn't an overly obsessed teenage student at a community college.

Chapter 2 : Cafeteria, Greendale Car Park, 12:20-17:30

"...and that's why Jews don't deserve to eat near me."
"That was horrible, Pierce." Jeff added, trying to lighten the mood.
"What are you now? A GAY, Jewish sympathiser?"
"Pierce! Stop! Jeff is simply defending me and my... Okay, I have a confession."
"Go on, Jew bag."
"Pierce! I'm not going to take offence at that - as I'm not Jewish. My mum is, so I am by default. I'm... Agnostic."
"That wouldn't have anything to do with Jeff being agnostic?" Britta smirked at her remark, receiving a red faced glare back from Annie.
"No! I just- I believe that the agnostic way of life is better."
"That would explain the Christmas display." Annie switched her glare to Jeff, who glanced up from his blackberry instantly realising what he said. "Excuse me, I need to leave. I have an important meeting with... My car. She gets lonely." Jeff smirked at his group's disapproval and ran out the room. The group couldn't find out about him and Annie at Christmas. Especially after their reactions after finding out about Britta in paintball and Annie after the 'Tranny Dance'. This would get him hung, drawn and quartered - after being castrated and tied to his car bonnet, and paraded around campus like a trophy. Maybe he'd thought that through a LITTLE too much...

"So, Abed. Ready for Kickpuncher 4.5? The Return of Facesmasher?"
"Of course. I can see it ending like King Kong or a similar defeat of a giant, mainly for the effect of a cliche which adds comedic value."
"Sure, just don't be late."
"We share an apartment."
"Don't be late. The Dreamatorium can wait."
Abed waved at Troy as they left the library. Pierce had left early after a 'heart issue', leaving the other 5 (minus Shirley still) to entertain themselves. Britta left with Troy, most likely to explore their recently discovered chemistry. Abed went towards the streets, aiming for his apartment. Annie stole Jeff just as he put the key into his car door.
"Annie - I need to get home."
"No you don't. You do nothing at home. You just watch tv and work out."
"Annie... Have you been watching me?-"
"What I've been doing doesn't matter. It's what you do. Halloween is coming up in 2 weeks...again..."
"Oh dear. Any zombies, drugs or parties planned?"
"Stop joking Jeff. I'll get to the point - the Halloween event this year is one of the 5 yearly dances."
"Ah. You want me to look like a pedophile in front of the whole school while you satisfy your teenage lust for older men."
"Well..." Annie fiddled with her hair. "Yes."

Chapter 3 : Greendale Car Park, Jeff's Apartment, 17:45-18:15

"Annie... I need to get home."
"Why?"
"My... My mum is dying!"
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Can I-"
"I'm kidding. But seriously, I got to go." Jeff kissed Annie on the forehead before flinging open the driver side door of his Lexus. Annie staggered back in a slight daze. The Lexus revved as Jeff slammed the door, and then reel down the window.
"Does this mean you'll still go to the dance with me?"
"Only if you make it clear YOU wanted ME to go. Even if I do have feelings I can't have people thinking that." Jeff did the Winger Smile at her as he pulled out and watched her stand by the car. "Abed and Troy are having a Kickpuncher marathon tonight. Enjoy."
"No wait!"
The Lexus stopped and reversed back to the parking space.
"I want to move in with you."
"Woah! Annie! A little too fast? I'm sorry, but I'm gonna be a pedophile in 2 weeks anyway. I can't have this happen. Wait till summer?"
"No." Annie pulled open the passenger side door and sat down inside.
"Hey!... Mind the leather."

"2nd floor, 56. You go first. Can't have this looking like something." The Lexus pulled up outside Jeff's apartment block. Annie smiled as Jeff reluctantly passed her his apartment keys. "Don't break them. Or lock me out."
"I won't." Annie stepped out and skipped inside, through reception to the stairs. Jeff waited 2 minutes before moving.
"Hi Jeffrey." The receptionist greeted him as he walked past.
"Hello, George." Jeff didn't stop walking and went upstairs. His door was already open as the lighting was pouring out into the corridor.
"Annie?" Jeff poked his head around his own apartment door. Annie jumped out, holding a bottle of vodka and a pack of cards.
"Hi! I found your apartment."
"AND the alcohol? You're on a roll today."
"I've always wanted to play poker. I never learnt due to my strict parents. But as I'm now away from them and holding some vodka..."
"Annie. As long as you promise not to say to anyone that the vodka is mine. You're nearly still underage for that stuff."
"Shut up!" Annie slapped him playfully across his chest, with the pack of cards.
"Annie." She immediately Disney faced him, predicting his impending speech. "One game."
"It's fine. One game and I'll leave."

"Holy Jesus. My head..." Jeff sat up and took in his surroundings. 8:40.
He was on the floor, ontop of a blanket and under one - sorta like a sandwich. He tried to pull it off of him, but it pulled back.
"Oh dear." He turned to his right to see Annie asleep under the blanket.
"Oh crap crap crap!" He whispered more obscenities to himself while he threw some clothes on. He then saw the empty vodka bottles next to the 'bed' and he sunk even more.
"Shit."

He instinctively checked his Blackberry - no missed or sent calls and texts. Awesome. That just meant dealing with the almost-minor that was drunk and god knows what else on the floor of his apartment. Annie stirred, sending Jeff down onto the sofa.
"Jeff?" She sat up, rubbing her eyes. He then saw the pile of clothes next to the 'bed'... Topped by a beige bra with black lace around the rim.
"Annie... You seem more awake than me." He shifted down next to her. "What happened last night?"

"Donde esta la biblioteca?"
"Oh Christ! Don't start that again!" Britta slammed her notepad into the table. "Its bad enough Jeff isn't here to control us - where's Annie?"
"Oh. She went home with Jeff in his Lexus. I saw on my way home."
"What?!" Britta stood up and glared at the empty seats.
"Hey, Britta. Relax. I'm sure nothing happened... Or is happening."
"That isn't helping."
"Hello, Greendale 7! Dean Pelton here... In case you forgot me overnight. As you may know- OH MY GOD! Where's Jeffrey?!"
"Jeff is at home. With Annie." Pierce snorted at Troy.
"Hah! Call that underage?! Once I-"
"No!" A collective yell came from everyone in the room.
"It's not the same without Jeffrey... Anyway, the Halloween dance is coming up in 2 weeks. I hope to see you there!" The Dean walked out, surprisingly less springy than usual.
"Wow, he's so gay." Pierce laughed at himself before he saw the rest of the group's faces. "What?!"

"I don't remember? I have my pen in my bag..."
"What use is your pen?"
"It's a microphone. My parents made me have one throughout my younger years at school. It kinda stuck."
"Okay..." Jeff breathed deeply, preparing to be thrown into a 8 foot deep pool of shit. Annie fiddled with some buttons - still holding the blanket up over her body - and a small burst of static showed the start of last night.
""Hey, Jeff. Look! My hands look funny!""
""That's the vodka, milady."" A loud bang followed before joint laughter.
""Haha! I win! You have to take off your shirt!""
""Fine. You're next!""

Jeff nearly choked. "Oh dear."
"I... Remember a bit now..." Annie went quiet for a bit before continuing the recording.

""Hah! I win 3 in a row! And you only have 2 bits of clothing left! You can just, uh, pour vodka on yourself! As well as that!""
""Jeff... You're a perv!"" Joint laughter again and the sound of liquid dripping to the floor. Both their speech was slurring now.
""How about some fun..."" Annie slammed her bottle on the table.
""Heh. I could do with a drink.""
""Jeffrey Winger! You are naughty!""

"I've heard enough."
"Really? I kinda like it..."
"Annie. As we've just proven - last night never happened, okay? As I found out last time, we can't hide it. Either we come out or keep quiet forever."
"Okay..."
"Oh, I'd get some clothes on. We can still get there in time for Anthropology."

"Wow... What are Jeff and Annie doing?"
"Playing paintball... If you know what I mean."
"Pierce! That was a mistake."
"You say otherwise."
"Shut up. It happened, okay? No need to dwell on it!"
"You're right." Britta started to smile. "We've got new material soon."
"Pierce! That's horrible!" The sound of an opening door ended Pierce's retort.
"Sorry, We-I'm late. I was busty-BUSY! I said busy." Jeff staggered in through the door and collapsed on his chair. Annie followed suit an fell into her chair.
"Well, you two missed Dean confess his concern for Jeff... And there's a Halloween dance coming up."
"I know." Jeff and Annie chimed. "We know."
"We spent last night... Practising."
"I'm sorry Annie, but Jeff doesn't spend a night with a girl for anything besides-"
"Relax, Britta. Nothing happened in that nature."
"Yep." Annie sat back and her bag squished against the chair back, setting off the pen from the recording's last location.
""Oh, Jeffrey Winger. You are naughty.""

Chapter 4 : Greendale Library/Car Park/Jeff's Apartment Block, 11:30-12:30

Annie and Jeff bolted from the room, with Annie mistakenly leaving her bag on her chair. They ran to the Lexus and drove away, paying no attention to onlookers or Britta's yells.

"That's a little too much." Troy tried to convince Pierce to stop the recording. He had grabbed the bag once they left.
"No! It's funny listening to it!"
"Pierce! Put the bag down!" Britta and Abed joined in, once the vodka had run out.
"No!" Pierce pulled away and rummaged around for the pen. He seized it and threw the bag away. "Haha! It's mine now, losers!" He ran out the library, his pen seemingly moaning at innocent bystanders.
"Oh Jesus. For Jeff's sake - we need that pen." Britta stood up and grabbed Troy and Abed. "We've got a horny pensioner to catch."

Jeff was over. He had publicly lost all respect, been branded (or soon to be) pedophile and now he was trapped in his apartment with Annie.
"Look, Annie. You're a good kid, and I like you-"
"You said more than that last night."
"Look. I've lost everything. All because a young girl and a desperate old man got together last night and got drunk."
"Well... Now you have nothing to lose." Annie smiled at Jeff, working every power she had over him.
"Annie. We've ruined you and your innocence."
"I don't care!" She stood up, leaning forward on the table. "I don't! I love you Jeff, and last night just reinforced that! I never had sex with Vaughn and last night-"
"Wait- how do you remember last night?"
"I may- MAY have kinda swapped my vodka for... Water."
"You cunning... sexy Annie. That explains the lack of alcohol smell lingering around you considering you basically bathed in it. You know what- fuck it." Jeff stood up and dragged her into his bedroom, giggling, slamming the door shut behind him.

Pierce was bound and gagged in the corner of the library, after Abed used an Indiana Jones trap to catch him. Britta pocketed the pen and sat down with Troy and Abed.
"We've got to get Jeff back!"
"So, we won't worry about Annie?"
"Troy, they are in the same place. We get two for one. It's two pears with one apple."
"Er, Britta. It's usually two birds with one stone."
"I know, but that is unethical and I don't believe it's right."
"Whatever. Let's go get these lovebirds."
"Mhmmmuhnfnshndf!" Pierce complained from the corner.
"What do we do with him?"
"Smuggle him into my car, past reception. Anthropology can go jump off a cliff. We'll drive to Jeff's."

"Wow." Jeff relaxed a little bit more, lying back in his bed. It was a lot more comfortable than a hangover on the floor under blankets. Annie was lying on his chest - as Abed would say in a ridiculously cliched way. "You're amazing."
"I can't judge you. I'm- WAS a virgin. I think. The thing when I was on the pills didn't happen."
"Oh Jesus!" Jeff sat up, knocking Annie off him. "I forgot that I unknowingly deflowered a pretty, bright student while she tricked me into bed."
"Yeah, well. It worked." Annie shoved him back down and lay back on his chest.
"You planned this last year. I remember. You saw the window of opportunity last night and took it. That, is genius." Knocking from the apartment door stopped conversation.
The couple looked at each other and stared.
"What do we do?" Annie whispered, avoiding any sound getting out of the room.
"We... Own up."
"No!"
"We've got no choice. Unless we get dressed and tidy up in 2 minutes and open the door."
"Done."

"Annie? Jeff? We're here! Outside..."
"Troy, that won't work. Here : Oi! Lovebirds! Open the door! We don't care what's happened and/or happening!" Britta smiled and turned back to Troy. "We do actually care - they own up and we rip Jeff to pieces."
"That's horrible, and won't work." Troy smiled.

Jeff scrambled to his jeans and shirt, with Annie diving for her equivalent. Jeff picked up his Blackberry.
"Okay. We pretend that nothing happened. I'll get the door on my phone. You... Do something."
Jeff waited for the next yell from outside before opening the door.
"Hi." Jeff continued to pointlessly tap at his Blackberry.
"Jeff! Wassssuppp!"
"Is that a reference?"
"Nope." Britta walked straight past and into the middle of the room. Annie was folding 2 blankets and smiled at seeing Britta.
"Britta! Hi!"
"Annie..." Britta stepped close enough to whisper. "What happened last night?"
"You! You are all as bad as Britta! You just want to snoop around and hear about my sex life- shit."
"Aha! Jeff Winger - come with us."
"No. You don't understand." Jeff cleared his throat, preparing for a speech. "Annie here was alone and desperate last night. She wanted to learn how to play poker -"
"Oh, we heard."
"-And she exploited me and my carelessness. I took her in - sheltered her, fed her. Entertained her. Her only crime is having strict parents and loving me."
"Awww." Troy tried to do it as manly as possible.
"Enough!" Britta stepped forward. "You and Annie are 11 years apart! How can you do that!"
"Ask her." Jeff waved his Blackberry at Annie. He winked at her when he had lost the attention of Britta.
"Well?"
"Jeff and I - we played poker. Things got out of hand-"
"Like paintball!"
"Okay. Screw this. This isn't working - me and Annie had sex last night. And this morning after her pen went off. Big deal." Jeff pushed past Britta and threw himself onto the couch.
"Okay then. We should probably go free Pierce now."

"Hehehe."
""Oh, Jeff!""
Pierce stopped the recording as he saw Britta come out the front of the building. "Shit!"
He put his tape back on his mouth and sat back, dropping the pen on the floor of Britta's eco friendly Hyundai.
"Pierce..."
"Mhmmmafummn."
"You can come out now."
"Oh good!" Pierce peeled the tape off. "Can I keep the pen?"
"No!"
"Damn you, you blonde hippy!"

Chapter 5 : Greendale Library, 10:00

The study group sat in silence. The awkwardness couldn't be broken-
"Goooood morning! Dean Pelton- Jeffrey! You're back! And so's Annie..."
"Get on with it, Dean."
"Okay, Jeffrey. Sheesh. As you know it's less than one week till Halloween. Just thought I'd remind you. Jeffrey." The Dean touched Jeff on his way out, not helping the situation.
"I CAN'T TAKE IT!" Troy slammed his anthropology textbook on the table. "Annie. Jeff. Do something. I can't go on like this!"
"Okay... As I said before. Nothing should stop us looking at each other as sexual partners-"
"Besides a 11 year age gap."
"-but as we've discovered, this didn't work. Let's just accept that we all, even Abed, have sexual relations. Annie and I are just... Good friends."
"Jeff! Come on. We've got to be more than that."
"Okay." Jeff stood up. "Troy and Britta. You get together. That way me and Annie won't seem as awkward."
"What about me?"
"Pierce... Here's 200$."
"You know me too well." Pierce reached over to Jeff's hand. "Bye losers! I'm off to get laid!"
"Well, we've got lunch now." Britta collected her bag from her chair and left, trailed by Troy.
"Milady."
"Milord."
Abed watched the couples leave, and stayed seated.
"Happy endings never happen..."

"Jeff! Go easy!"
"Sorry. Just say if anything is too much."
"Don't stop!"
"I really like your hair down."
"I like you. A lot."
Jeff rolled off of Annie to his side of the bed. The apartment was as it was in the past morning - hidden vodka and blankets in every corner. Annie giggled, attracting a look from Jeff.
"What?"
"I can't believe this is happening. I used to like Troy... Then I found out he was a bit of a dick. Then... You. And this." Annie reached up to his head and kissed him.
"You had this planned from the start."
"Indeed I did." Annie kissed him again.
"What's happening for the dance then?"
"We dance. Depending on the music."
"I hope Slater isn't there. That WILL get me publicly branded as a pedophile - oh wait. You're gonna say you asked ME. Which you did."
"Wow. Your social status means so much to you."
"Just cos you don't have one."
"Shut up. I do now."
"Annie." Jeff sat up. "We've known each other for 3 years. We've debated, fought, kissed in public and won a court case. We've gone against everything and pulled through. If anything is allowed to be called magic - that is." Jeff patted her head. "One day. One day I'll-"
"Shhh." Annie put her finger to his mouth.
"One day I'll settle down."

Annie and Jeff walked from Jeff's apartment to Greendale, in full Halloween garb. Jeff was a cowboy, again, and Annie was wearing her paintball game outfit - also cowboy-esque. The pair held hands and shared jokes on their way there. Britta and Troy were already there, getting along like awkward new couples do. Pierce was avoiding any LSD today, desperate not to rely on Jeff to survive it. Annie and Jeff walked straight into the library, not trying to conceal their love. The Dean announced a slow dance contest - the 2 pairs instantly rising to the challenge. Abed - aka Batman -watched from outside, from behind closed doors.
"I guess happy endings really do exist..."

"Why are we in such a rush to leave the tide pool? When the only things waiting for us onshore are the sands of time, and the hungry seagulls of slowly growing apart..."