Living in the Everglades is the most peaceful thing on this planet. Of course, that's my opinion. I guess that's what to expect when you're Florida. I'm Joshua Jones, but I like the name J.J better. Far more relaxed. I look a bit like America, with his hair, but I have gentle golden eyes like a honeysuckle. I have the kind complexion of a tanned surfer. It's a good body to have, even if there are no women to tame. Of course, no woman needs to be tamed, if she is feisty, let it be so. Right of the bat, I'm going to say that there's nothing more calming than floating along with Toothy, my American Alligator, and watching a Blue Heron. Did I mention I'm a nature buff?

Not to say that Florida's boring! Certainly not! I've got glorious cities, beautiful beaches, and don't even get me started on Disney World! It's a nice life being relaxed though. Sitting back, eating a cutie? Perfection in itself!

It was a nice day out, slightly humid, and the humidity had been making me drowsy. I hadn't had my morning cup of joe, since I was trying to quit caffeine, cold turkey. I curled up in my favorite arm chair, and fell asleep, underneath a blanket Alfred had gotten for me during a bad storm, to quiet a baby me down.

I blinked open my eyes to a blurry girl. "Ah! He's awake! Finally!" She squealed. I moved back into my chair, hoping it was a dream.

"Hello, Sunshine, the Sun says hello!" California proudly announced, striking an odd pose. I shifted a bit and yawned. Must be all that damn anime she watches.

"Wow, you must be tired. I've never seen you pass out like this! Anyways, happy birthday!" Michigan smiled, rubbing my head.

Damn them, waking me up like that! I was having a great dream! I looked over at the clock. 12:45. Hm. Not bad. Wait. Birthday?

I sleepily checked my phone's calendar. Sure enough, it was March 3rd. My birthday. Texas marched into my home, carrying what looked like trash cans. "Haley, what are those?" I asked, stretching to unwind my tight muscles from the long nap.

"Oh, nothing, Sunshine!" She batted her eyelashes in a mocking way.

I rolled my eyes, groaning slightly. "Tell me, Haley. I'm not in the mood to dance around less than sensitive subjects. I just woke up."

"They're some fireworks from back home. I thought since it's your 16th, you might want to throw a bigger party than you normally do!"

My parties are normally small family gatherings, and then taking some of my closer family members to Disney World with me. Not many bothered to show up to any of my previous birthdays, or even call to wish me a happy birthday. Most just skirted the topic all together. It was amazing to me that anyone would think of my birthday, and throw such a big party! With fireworks!

I could feel my heart thump one thump faster. I was very nearly going to thank Haley, when…

"THE HERO HAS ARRIVED!"

I sighed. "J.J! Happy birthday! How's it going? Got anything to report about? Haha, you know I'm just kidding!" His voice rambled on and on.

"I've been fine, chill!" I teasingly scolded.

"Wonderful! Where's the food? I'm starving! Is there cake?" Alfred fist bumped with me.

I was about to say that I had no idea that it was even my birthday, but then I caught Minnesota, carrying a cake. Alfred looked enticed.

"Looks like Mini's beat ya to it!" I laughed slightly, and moved to my favorite blue chair in the left corner of the room, where the heater was, making it cozier. I watched as my family marched into my tiny home. "How'd you handle the mud? And Toothy?" I asked, sleepy.

Ohio just patted my head. "Don't worry about it, and have a good time, Joshua. This looks like it'll be a nice party."

"I didn't know about this." I muttered, exhausted.

Ohio just chuckled, and patted my head. "You can thank your twin." He joked. "Speak of the devil…" He murmured. I opened up my eyes to their full roundness, and watched a sly Tex snake her way towards my

"J.J! Come here! It's your special surprise!" Tex called, yanking me from my chair, and into the sunset lit backyard. I looked out past my fencing (to keep Toothy away from unsuspecting mail men) and into the swampy marsh behind it. Flinging about fire, Cali stood knee-deep in mud. No. No, that wasn't her! She wouldn't dare risk her fakeness out in the swap.

Especially for me.

"There's something in it for her." Texas beamed.

Cali screamed bloody murder as red and blue fireworks exploded on the ground, hardly a few feet away from her, while at least fifteen orange and whites shot up in the sky with a boom as the colors drizzled down like melting candle wax. Cali kept screaming, but it was drowned out as the second round of fireworks exploded in the sky, spelling out,

Happy Birthday FL

At once, my honeysuckle eyes were teary, and I could see Tex staring at me. "Didn't you like it?" She asked, looking concerned.

"Yes. I did. This is the best birthday ever." I whispered, but Tex had already rolled her eyes, and returned to receiving praise from everyone for her kindness and smarts.

After that, the fireworks ended ("I ran out of fireworks!" Texas shouted in protest) and we all headed back inside for cake and drinks. Since I was only sixteen, we naturally had to go with Coke, but New York snuck me a Bud Light. I didn't want to admit it, but it tasted gross.

Cali was outside still, as the mosquitoes buzzed, wrestling with Toothy out in the muddy swamp. She screamed, but we were laughing so hard, no one could hear her.

Almost everyone brought up some embarrassing piece of my history, whether it be when I ran out in the middle of a tropical cyclone, or when I stuck my face in Toothy's mouth as a seven year old. I turned bright red, but I felt… Normal.

In a family of 50, a family so weird, this piece of normality was salvaged.

Most of my birthdays were hot messes.

Normal people had quiet birthdays, with maybe six friends, a small cake inscribed with Happy Birthday Junior, and some balloons, as well as presents.

I had a loud birthday, with 49 states and America, a huge ass cake lacking any message, fireworks, and my family hardly bothered to get me a single gift.

Still.

Pretty nice birthday.