A/N: Hello! :D So, when I wrote this in my notebook, I originally planned for it to be six pages long, but it ended up taking 10, so yay for me, because I've been trying to write more 3 I'm really proud of myself XD
"Allen…" Lenalee said through the bathroom door. "You've been in the shower forever. Kanda has to take one too, you know." she knocked again. "I hope you waste all the hot water, Kanda will wring your neck." The Chinese said, more to herself than Allen. She knocked once more. He probably fell asleep. Lenalee giggled at the thought. "Is that fucking Beansprout out yet?" Kanda said, coming up behind her and placing his hands around her small waist while resting his chin on her shoulder. "No. He probably fell asleep."
"Whatever." He turned and walked toward the kitchen.
Lenalee knocked again. "C'mon Allen. I'm coming in." She turned the knob and pushed the door open. "Allen?" she said, peeking around the door.
Blood. There was blood dripping onto the cold tile floor from a pale wrist that was hanging out of the tub. There was an empty pill bottle on the floor, a few diamond-shaped pills scattered around it, soaked with blood. Her pills.
"ALLEN!" she screamed, running forward and squeezing his still-bleeding wrist to try and stem the flow. "KANDA! HELP ME!" she screamed again, tears dripping down her face. The Japanese came running in, and stood, stunned in the doorway. "Help me pull him out!" she sobbed, collapsing to her knees in the pool of bloody water. "Move. I'll pull him out and you call an ambulance." Kanda ordered. Lenalee nodded numbly and stood, her bare feet nearly slipping out from under her on the slick tile.
Allen had cut three gaping wounds on each of his wrists and swallowed almost the whole bottle of pills. Pills that she had left on the counter. Pills that she hadn't realized were gone. It's al my fault. Lenalee thought, dialing the emergency services number with shaking fingers. "Hello. What's your emergency?" the woman on the other end said calmly. "My roommate just tried to kill himself. He took around 10 200 milligrams tablets of Lamotrigine and slit his wrists. He's 18, no history of drug use and he isn't allergic to anything. No family, either." Lenalee said with urgency, also stating their address. "We'll send help right away. Keep pressure on the wounds and stay calm. An ambulance will arrive in about 10 minutes."
_A while later_
Lenalee sobbed into Kanda's chest. "I-it's a-all my fault!" she stuttered. "No it's not. It isn't your fault at all." Kanda said. Lenalee broke away from him as her cell phone rang. She dug it out of her purse, hands shaking.
"Hello?" she asked, her voice shaking. "Yes, hello. Is Lenalee Lee there?"
"This is she."
"Ah, hello. I've called to inform you that your roommate is out of his coma. He's stable and has asked to see you."
"Thank you! We'll be over right away!" she said breathlessly, tapping the 'end call' button. A smile found away to her lips, despite the fact that she was standing next to her other near-dead roommate.
They rushed out of Allen's room and made their way out of the ward towards Lavi's.
"Where's Lenalee?" they heard, a groggy voice say inside Lavi's room. "And Allen, and Kanda?" Kanda scoffed. "He's still an idiot." He said under his breath. Lenalee elbowed him in the ribs before walking into Lavi's room.
"Lena!" Lavi yelled childishly, a bright smile on his face. "Hey Lavi! I'm glad you're finally awake! I missed you." What an understatement. She thought as she bent down to hug him and kiss his cheek, mindful of his most likely still-tender ribs. "Do you remember anything?" Lenalee asked, sitting in a chair next to the bed. "Not really. I remember following Allen to someone's house, and being really jealous for some reason. I don't know why. But that's it." Lavi's smile stayed in place, though his uncovered eye stared down at his blanket, where his hand was fiddling with a loose thread. Lenalee smiled back. "So, um… where's Allen?" he asked, his smile fading a bit more. Lenalee's blood seemed to freeze in her veins and she went white as a sheet. Eyes wide and palms sweating, she spoke almost in a whisper: "Allen… he… must've been really depressed. I guess he felt like it was his fault you were hurt and I think he may have broken up with a girlfriend or something. But… today he, um… took my antidepressants and tried to kill himself." She squeezed her eyes closed and clenched her fists, the last part coming out like one word.
Lavi stared at her blankly. "I want to see him." The redhead started to swing his now-healed legs over the side of the bed. "No." Kanda said, stepping forward. "Kanda… just let him go." Lenalee said, giving him a pleading look. "Tch." He scoffed, turning to leave. "Come on Lavi. Can you stand alright?" she said, grabbing his hand. "Mhm." He hummed, giving her a reassuring smile. He stood, wobbling slightly, and wrapped an arm around her shoulder for support.
Once they had made their way through the halls and stood outside Allen's room, Lenalee asked: "Are you sure?" Lavi merely nodded, a determined look crossing his features. He let go of Lenalee and walked—unsteadily—into Allen's room.
Allen was pale. He had bandages wrapped from right below his hand to a little above his elbow, and Lavi could see the scarlet-red of his blood slowly leaking through. "Allen." Lavi breathed, rushing towards his bedside as fast as his still-painful legs would take him.
Allen was still asleep, so Lavi took one of his small hands in his own. Gently, the redhead turned his hand palm-up and stared at the blood coming from his wrist. Bringing the hand to his lips, Lavi pressed a kiss into Allen's palm and closed it. "Allen… I love you so much. Why would you do this to yourself? I love you and I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." Tears slipped from his eyes. "Lavi…" a soft voice whispered. The redhead's head snapped up, a single green eye staring into grey ones. "Allen I'm so sorry."
"It's not your fault."
"It is."
Allen shook his head and smiled. He took Lavi's hand and brought it to his lips, much like the redhead had done earlier. "I love you Lavi." He whispered, and pressed his lips to Lavi's knuckles. Allen smiled again. "I-I love you too." Lavi stuttered, smiling again.
_About 2 weeks later_
"Hey, Allen…" Lavi said, rolling over on his side to face the younger, who was lying next to him. "Mhm?" Allen hummed, turning his head and staring into Lavi's eye patch-less eye. "I…I think I'm going to move out soon. And I was wondering if… if you would want to come with me…?" Lavi trailed off, looking away. Allen smiled and pulled himself towards the redhead. He pressed a quick kiss to the older's mouth. "Yes. Of course I will." Lavi smiled and pulled into his chest, kissing the top of his head, "I love you Allen."
"I love you too Lavi." Allen's voice was muffled by Lavi's chest.
There was a knock at the door and the two quickly broke apart. "Allen! Wake up and get dressed. You have to eat your breakfast and get to counseling. And don't forget to take your pills!" Lenalee said, "Oh! And if Lavi's in there he needs to come take his pain meds too." She added, knocking once more. "Okay, Lena! I'll be out in a sec." Allen called, blushing slightly at almost being caught.
Lavi sat up and stretched his long arms upwards. He winced at the sudden pain in his ribs. Even after a couple weeks of rehab and pills, he still felt sore every morning. "You okay?" Allen asked from the closet. "Mhm." Lavi said with a smile. "But the question is, are you okay, Allen?" the latter had been rummaging around in the closet, humming to himself, but now he stood frozen, a shirt Lavi had given him hanging from his fingers. "Ah—Allen, I'm sorry. Don't listen to me, I didn't mean to say that out loud." Lavi got up from the bed and limped over to Allen.
"I'm not okay." Allen breathed. "Allen…" Lavi said, wrapping his arms around the smaller boy from behind. The redhead tightened his grip as he felt Allen flinch and begin to shake. Lavi spun Allen around in his arms so they faced each other. A single green eye stared into two steel-grey ones. "It's okay to not be okay, Allen. You can talk to me about anything." Lavi said, wiping a tear from Allen's cheek with his thumb. Allen nodded. Suddenly, he rushed forward and buried himself in the taller boy's chest. "I'm so sorry. I'm s-so, so, s-sorry." He sobbed. "Don't be sorry, Allen. It's all right. No one is angry with you." Lavi said soothingly, stroking Allen's hair and leading him back to the bed.
Allen fell asleep in Lavi's arms, tears drying on his cheeks. Lavi smiled sadly.
I'm sorry, Allen.
A/N: I'm s- whoops. I realized that I apologize way too much and I make the characters apologize a lot too. Well, as always, I hope you enjoyed and I encourage you to leave a review :] I apologize if anything is unrealistic.