Sorry I am a day late… life! Ugh… so much going on!

The final chapter :O Well, the non Destiel version… You don't have to read this if you are reading the Destiel version, they are the same apart from the ending…

Enjoy and please leave feedback!

Breaking Benjamin – Until the End

Why give up, why give in?

It's not enough, it never is.

So I will go on until the end.

We've become desolate.

It's not enough, it never is.

But I will go on until the end.

Surround me, it's easy,

To fall apart completely.

I feel you creeping up again.

It's over, no longer,

I feel it growing colder.

I knew this day would come to end,

So let this life begin.

I've lost my way.

I've lost my way, but I will go on until the end.

Balthazar and Gabriel returned to their room when Cas had fallen asleep rested against Gabriel's side. They had booked the room next to the Winchester's in case anything went wrong or if Cas needed them. Now that they were back, both brothers were determined not to let Castiel down again.

Neither had slept much all night, both plagued by images of Cas being tortured and locked up, and in Gabriel's case flashbacks of Cas' bruised and battered body.

"Gabe, you awake?"

"Yeah."

"What are we going to do?"

"I don't know, I don't know what we can do. I feel dreadful."

"Me too." There didn't seem to be anything left to say so Balthazar rolled over and hugged his feather pillow closer, waking up an hour later with a start after dreaming about Lucifer looming over Cas with a knife.

They had arranged to meet Cas and the Winchesters at breakfast the next morning and plastered on false smiles when they joined them at a table.

"Morning everyone." Gabe grinned and sat down at the table but was immediately uneasy when he saw that Cas was not with them. Balthazar didn't take a seat, staring around for his brother; hands clenched into fists, what else could possible go wrong?

"Where's Castiel?"

"Don't worry, he's on his way. Said something about praying so we left him to it." Balthazar nodded and finally took a seat next to Gabriel, who was next to Sam. This left the seat between Dean and Balthazar free for Cas.

"So. Boys. Now what? We stare at each other for the rest of eternity?" Gabriel's attempt at humor fell rather flat and he stared somewhat awkwardly down at his hands, waiting for someone to break the silence.

"So, um, how come you moved to England?" Balthazar's expression revealed that Sam's question had not gone down well, but the eldest brother calmly explained about the job offer he had received and how Gabriel had wanted to get away for a while, his relationship with their father hadn't been the best.

"What, so you just upped and left Cas with Lucifer?"

"I-I didn't know Lucifer could ever do anything like that. I mean he is-was my brother too. I loved him and I thought he loved the family to. He was always Dad's favorite." There was a hint of jealousy in Gabriel's tone, but it failed to cover up the fact that Gabriel was taken aback by Dean's arrogance and aggression. The dick didn't have a clue about his family life. People always saw him as the joker, the runt of the family who ran off to study sociology and psychology. The human mind fascinated him and he felt a great love for his species, just because he wasn't the most successful businessman ever did not mean that he was worthless.

"Shut your cake-hole. You don't know anything about my family. I loved my father, and my brothers. Loved them! But I was so fed up with the arguing, I needed to escape. I couldn't bear it! Okay? So I left. If I'd have known what that big bag of dicks was going to do to my brother I would never have moved!" Dean could hear the sincerity in Gabriel's voice and found himself feeling slightly guilty, who was he to judge when it came to bad decisions about family.

"Sorry man, just a bit tired. It's been a stressful few weeks."

"Sure, I'm sorry to. I guess you did find Cas, if you hadn't I hate to think what would have happened!" Gabriel and Balthazar shuddered at the thought, the eldest remaining silent. He had listened to Gabriel's tirade and felt awful, he should have done more to keep their family together.

Everyone at the table let out a small sigh of relief when Castiel entered the breakfast room albeit walking with a slight limp due to the pain in his side.

"Hey Cas." Everyone smiled as if nothing had happened when Castiel sat down, offering him cups of tea, coffee and juice, all of which he politely refused, instead settling for a glass of water.

"You alright little brother?" Balthazar looked concerned, the Cas he remembered had always had a love for sweet food, drinking hot-chocolates with extra sweetener or tea with four sugars.

"I'm fine." The look that Gabriel shot Cas made him open up within an instant, he could always get through to Cas when they were younger and it seemed as if some things never change.

"I just feel a little bit queasy, the painkillers don't agree with me much."

"You should eat something." Dean stood and led Cas to the continental breakfast table, watching as Cas loaded a bowl with fresh fruit. He'd have done anything to escape that table!

"Uh, I meant something with a few calories. You need to eat a burger or something, get some meat on your bones." Cas tilted his head, wondering why Dean would care about his 'meat,' unless Dean was a vampire, but then he realized that Dean was being ironic. It seemed like years of hardship and time spent away from Gabriel had taken its toll on Cas' sense of humor.

When they both returned to the table, Cas having compromised with two slices of plain toast, Sam grunted in disgust at Dean's plate. Well, plates. He had managed to cram a stack of pancakes the size of his head on one plate, had waffles on another and to top it all off he was balancing pot of full-fat yoghurt on one of his wrists.

"What is up with you and your food choices? It's 8 in the morning!"

"You can talk salad boy…ugh that salad cream gloop you eat!" A look of disgust crossed Dean's features. "It's like eating self righteousness or something. Anyway, what's wrong with my food?"

"It's not food anymore, Dean! It's Darwinism."

"Shut up bitch, I like it!"

"Unhealthy jerk."

"Ouch that hurt Sammy." Dean mocked looking offended before cramming a forkful or syrup loaded pancakes into his mouth and groaning in satisfaction. "Ugh God you got to taste this." Sam looked amused but realized that the others at the table seemed less impressed.

"You haven't said Grace." It was Balthazar who spoke up first, offering a hand to Gabriel and Castiel.

"Grace?"

"We need to thank God for bringing us back together, for providing us with food and love at a time when we need it most."

"Uh, yeah, of course." Dean grimaced internally when he realized how chick flick this looked but did not comment, instead linking hands with the others at the table. He noted Cas glance at Balthazar, who gave him an encouraging nod before Cas opened his mouth to speak

"Thank you, Lord, for this food which is set before us. May we use it to nourish our bodies, and thee to nourish our souls. Make us ever more mindful of the needs of others, and the needs of our planet. Please forgive me my sins, O Lord; forgive me the sins of my youth and the sins of mine age, the sins of my soul and the sins of my body, my secret and my whispering sins, the sins I have done to please myself and the sins I have done to please others. Forgive those sins which I know, and the sins which I know not; forgive them, O Lord, forgive them all of Thy great goodness. Through Christ Our Lord, Amen."

Dean was surprised when he found himself saying Amen at the end of the prayer, along with everyone else at the table. Usually Dean would have laughed or scoff, but something about the prayer seemed poetic and though he would never admit it aloud, it was beautiful coming from Cas' lips.

After that everyone made idle small-talk, smiling more than necessary in Cas' direction hoping that he would not notice the worry in their eyes. It was as if they expected him to vanish or puff into a cloud of smoke.

The only real break in tension was when 'My Heart Will Go On' began to play from the speakers, which were meant to be playing calming atmospheric music that wasn't disagreeable. Within two bars of the song Balthazar stood up and excused himself stating that he needed the bathroom and would be back in a minute, but everyone heard him mumble something along the lines of "that god-awful Celine Dion song made me want to smite myself!"

As soon as he left Gabriel sprung into action, spooning some chili flakes into Balthazar's coffee and stirring it in until they had dissolved. If the hotel staff were kind enough to put chili flakes on the breakfast table, who was he to refuse them and their hospitality? The flakes were certainly going to good use.

"That was slightly harsh." Sam didn't know whether to be amused or to stand up for Balthazar, he quite liked the guy.

"Nah, this is nothing, you should have seen the Nair in the shampoo, Balthy didn't talk to me for a week!"

"No way, you didn't?!" Dean was now grinning for ear to ear, but Sam looked less amused, filling Cas and Gabe in.

"We were having a bit of a prank war and Dean thought it would be funny to do that to me as well…some people 'ey Cas, cant take 'em anywhere!" Cas smiled weakly, waiting for Balthazar to return, it would certainly be amusing.

When the eldest brother came back, thankfully when Celine Dion had stopped wailing, everyone forced a neutral expression, Cas biting his lower lip.

"You guys miss me?"

"Oh so much. It was like getting feathers plucked or something, not that I've ever been plucked or have feathers, but I guess for a bird it would be painful. Anyway, you get the gist."

"Whatever Gabe." Balthazar slumped back into his seat and grabbed his coffee, god knows he needed it after last night! Everyone watched with baited breath as he took the first sip, and then the second, and then…

"GABRIEL!" The familiar shout echoed through the breakfast room and reverberated around the corridor of the motel, but Gabriel had already disappeared somewhere. He knew to quit whilst he was ahead.

Later that night it was Balthazar who broached a subject that everyone had been avoiding all day.

"Um Cas, the thing is that me and Gabe need to head back to England in a couple of days. We are both settled there, houses, mortgages, jobs, girlfriends. What I'm trying to say is, come with us. You need a fresh start, to get away from everything."

A fresh start. Cas thought about that choice of phrasing for a while. He knew this had been coming and thought he had made a decision. He would leave with his brothers, his family, where he belonged, it was the obvious option. But did he really belong with them? Were they his real family? He loved his brothers and would do anything for them, but they hadn't seen each other for years. Something just didn't seem right. However, when Cas looked at Sam and Dean he realized that they were his true family. They had saved him, pulled him from a pit of despair and they were the ones who he really trusted with his life.

"I think, I think that I should stay here." Cas tilted his head towards Sam and Dean who looked bemused, but gave him a slight nod to let him know that they were ok with whatever Cas chose to do. It didn't cross either of their minds that they hunted monsters for a living, I mean, how were they going to break that one to Cas.

Oh, yeah, we forgot to mention the fact that we are hunters. Well, hunters is a bit of a loose term, we technically go out and kill evil sons of bitches, it's the family business. You know everything you ever thought went bump in the night when you were a kid, chances are that they do…yeah werewolves, vampires too, and there are also some monsters you wouldn't be able to dream up. Fancy meeting a Wendigo?

"Cas? Are you sure man, we could start again. Be a proper family." Gabriel looked at his brother, tears prickling in the back of his eyes. Castiel had never seen Gabriel cry and the sight almost tore through his resolve, but he was tougher now. What hadn't killed him made him stronger and he was certain that the place he belonged was by Dean and Sam's side.

"I'm sure. I love you, but I belong here with Sam and Dean, I am happy here."

"I understand Cas and you know I will stand by you no matter what, we are brothers, but this is a huge decision. Are you sure this is what you want?" Balthazar smiled mournfully down at his little brother, knowing that along the way part of their relationship had been lost.

They just weren't the same people any more. Cas wasn't a vulnerable child who needed protection from his older brothers. He was hardened like a soldier; he had seen and witnessed things that very few could even imagine. Yes, he was still young and yes he was in a fragile state of mind, but he was by no means defenseless. His stand-off with Lucifer proved that. Cas could defend himself and make his own decisions, and it looked as if his mind was made up.

"Yes. I'm sorry Balthazar, Gabriel."

"You have nothing to be sorry for." Sam and Dean both left the room when the three brothers enveloped each other in their arms, it was a private scene and neither Winchester was particularly well adapted to surviving chick flick moments.

Cas stood tall with his feet standing slightly apart wearing both his beige trench coat, which thankfully had been dry cleaned, and a slight frown. He had tilted his head to the side in order to watch his two elder brothers walk through the automatic doors at the airport. They were really leaving. For a moment Cas wondered whether he had made the right decision, and he contemplated leaving America behind, considered flying, soaring high in the skies with his brothers.

But he didn't follow them.

Instead, Cas turned his back on his family, rebelling against what society would expect of him, and he didn't care. If anything, the thing he was most worried about was the fact that he didn't care about the fact that he didn't care. Surely he should be feeling something, grief at his family walking away from him again, but he didn't. Instead, he felt free. It was almost as if the world had opened up to him, he could do whatever he wanted now, had the ability to use his free will however he wished. He could follow the American dream, find a nice cottage and live an apple-pie-life. But he didn't want that. Now that he had a choice, he wanted to stay with the Winchesters, who were waiting in the Impala for him. With a sad smile Cas turned and made his way towards his new brothers.

When Cas climbed into the back seat Dean turned and grinned at him.

"So, where are we heading?"

"Wherever you want to go Cas, it's up to you."

"Something to eat sounds good; I could kill a burger right now!"

"That was like music to my ears, PROPPER MUSIC, Sammy. Anyway, a crappy diner it is then."

"Jerk!" Sam attempted to toss a candy at his brother's head, but Dean simply caught it, pulled off the wrapper and threw the sweet into his mouth, all the while with a cocky grin. Them with a flourish he chucked the wrapper at Sam, laughing when it got caught in his floppy hair.

"And that is yet another reason why you should get a haircut!"

"Bitch!"

"Winchesters!" All three men looked at each other before bursting into laughter, they weren't quite sure where this road was going to take them, but for the time being stuffing their faces with unhealthy crap, or marginally healthy crap in Sam's case, seemed like a good idea.

Having suitably stuffed themselves to bursting point, Sam, Dean and Cas returned to their motel room and put on some old black and white western movie, which they barely paid attention to. They had mainly spent the venting chatting so all Cas had picked up was a guy riding a horse shooting another guy on a horse, then at some point some American Indians had popped up and then a load more people were dead and in the end the main guy kissed some pretty girl and saved the day. Boring.

After a couple of beers and a round of poker with Dean and Sam, Dean winning each time, Cas smiled contentedly and made his way to the bathroom to wash before bed.

Sam and Dean soon followed, all slumping into bed and preparing for sleep. Sam rolled onto his side and shuffled so that his overly-long legs were not in danger of falling from the bed, Dean placed his favorite knife under his pillow in case of emergencies and Cas said a silent prayer..

"Dear Lord Jesus, I know that I am a sinner, and I ask for Your forgiveness, both for me and my brother. I turn from my sins and invite You to come into my heart and life. Please Lord, accept Lucifer into your safe-keeping and on the great day of judgment, raise him up with all the saints to inherit your eternal kingdom. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen."

With that Cas rolled onto his good side and allowed his good arm to wrap protectively around his abdomen. He glanced over at Sam and Dean and smiled as he watched them fight over the spare pillow. This is where I belong.

Soon Cas was listening to the two brothers snoring softly in their sleep and smiled when Dean began mumbling something about a girl being his "cherry pie…my sweet surprise." Then, as the brothers fell into a deeper sleep and Cas dozed off the room fell into silence. A silence which was broken when one of Dean's many mobile phones began to ring, the sound ricocheting around the room and piercing the silence like a bomb set into motion.

Dean groaned wearily as the incessant bleeps continued, his hands scrambling in a draw until he pulled out the offending device.

"Hello?" Dean held the mobile to his ear with his shoulder and groaned, rubbing a hand over his eyes in an attempt to wake himself up.

"Hey Dean."

"This had better be good Bobby, it's fricken four in the morning!"

"I've found you boys a hunt, are you up for it?"

"Yeah, sure. Who's the son of a bitch that's giving you grief?"

"Poltergeist. It's gone native, full on revengeful spirit crap."

"Sure thing Bobby, we'll be round first thing tomorrow to drop Cas round with you."

"What? You still hanging around with the boy? I didn't think you were the type to take in strays."

"Bobby! Yes, we are still hanging with him, the kid has nowhere else to go."

"But his brothers…"

"Are halfway over the ocean by now, on the way back to England. Cas didn't want to go with them. Anyway, will you look after Cas for us while we are hunting?"

"Yeah, he can stay with me, but I ain't babysitting or anything."

"Thanks Bobby."

"See ya boys then. Stay out of trouble and don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"That's probably the worst piece of advice ever given out."

"Shut it ya Idjit."

"Seya tomorrow."

Dean hung up before turning to wake Sam up, who was already awake and sitting up.

"Hunt?"

"Yeah, Bobby's found us a poltergeist."

"Great, I take it we're going then."

"Yep, god knows we owe Bobby a favor after dealing with the last motel and Lucifer's body."

"What if Cas finds out what's up, I mean Bobby's place is hardly subtle?"

"Good point."

Sam and Dean exchanged looks at the young boy who was fast asleep in the bed next to them. He had been through so much for someone so young and there was far too much pain in his eyes. It had only been a matter of weeks since Sam and Dean had managed to bust him out from the cottage, and even less time since they had managed to break down his internal walls and make Cas come out of his shell a little.

The last thing he needed was to be told that there were yet more monsters out there that would hurt him as soon as look at him. No, the Winchesters had to protect Cas from that, he was just a child. They would not let him suffer any more, not under their watch…

The End…for now and unless you are reading the alternative Destiel ending for this chapter. If you are not, then this is your last chance to review, so go on! You know you want to!

Feedback truly means a lot and will help inspire me for the sequel, first chapter of which should be up next Monday (25th) maybe sooner if I get a chance to sit down and write!

I am still open for votes as to whether it should be Desitel or not. Anyway, thanks for sticking with me! Until next time, please review…over and out ;) x