Katniss POV
[An: please review to let me know if I should continue this story! I will post the next chapter when I get 10 reviews]
[disclaimer: I do not own the hunger games characters I simply own the plot]
I am at Finn's house with all of my friends except for Peeta. We are having a movie night and Peeta said he couldn't come because he has homework to finish. Everyone's phones go off at the same time. I look at my and see that Peeta updated his Facebook status. I clicked on the notification and gasped. It said I can't keep pretending I am okay. I just can't do this anymore. Goodbye world. I quickly put my shoes on and grabbing my coat on the way out. Please don't. Please don't. I keep repeating to myself as I ran across the street to Peeta's house. I didn't bother knocking on the door instead I just forced it open running straight to Peetas room. I guess we weren't the only one to see his post because when I arrived at Peetas room with everyone behind me his brothers were already there banging on the door begging to open the door.
I just stood there with my heart beating out of my chest, worrying for the boy I loves life. Finn finally got tires of Rye and Graham's attempt to get Peeta to open the door. He pushed them out of the way a kicked the door down. I rushed into the room to see Peeta on the floor in a puddle of his own blood. Tears start to fall out of my eyes. I crouch down next to him begging him not to leave me. He can't leave I will feel like part of me is missing. I grabbed his hand and don't let go until the paramedics arrive and I am forced to leave him. They put him on a stretcher and lift him into the ambulance. I get in the passenger seat of Finns car while Jo and Annie get in the back. Finn drives to the hospital in silence leaving me to drown in my own thoughts automatically thinking the worst.
We finally arrive and we all get out rushing to the waiting room where Peetas family is already waiting. I look at all of them to see everyone crying but Mrs. Mellark. They tell us that they are waiting for news and to sit down. I sit in the corner away from everyone staring blankly at the wall wondering if Peeta is going to be okay.
"Family and Friends of Peeta Mellark?" A gray haired Doctor asked.
Everyone all stood up and walked to the doctor. Peetas father asked the doc how he is.
"He is fine. He will just be in a lot of pain when he gets up. We had put him in a coma but he should wake up either today or to tomorrow. You may go see him now. I just have to check a couple of things." The doc replied before leading us to his room and opening the door motioning for us to go first and then he stepped in checking all of the machines.
"Why would he do this?" I asked no one in particular. But the doctor answered anyway, "studies say that people who commit suicide has been being bullied." No one answered him so he left.
I walked over to Peeta and sat next to his bed grabbing his hand. I don't plan on letting go anytime soon. I watch as Rye digs in his pocket and unfolds a couple pieces of paper. He tells everyone that he found it on Peetas bed. Everyone makes him read it out loud in a shaky voice he starts to read,
"Dear Everyone,
I had to do this. I did it for all of you and i did it for me. I am bothersome and worthless. Don't even try to deny it, I get reminded every hour of everyday."
"Mom, I forgive you for all the beatings you gave me and all the cruel words you sent my way. I deserved it. I know you wanted to have a baby girl, but you ended up with me. I know I am a disappointment to you, but I just want to tell you that, I love you and I am sorry that you got stuck with me for so long. I know deep down you might have grown to love me and I know you aren't good at showing emotion. But that's okay, I don't deserve your love. I don't deserve anyone's love. Now nobody has to deal with useless old me."
His mom looks over at Peeta with tears in her eyes before saying "I love you too, Peeta, I am so sorry for what I put you through." I watched as she hugged herself and sobbed remembering all of the horrible things she has done to her youngest boy. Rye continued to read the letter,
"Rye and Graham, I am sorry for being such an embarrassment to you. I tried so hard to stay away from you guys in public because I know you don't want to be seen with me because all I am is an embarrassing klutz. Well that's what all your guys friends tell me anyway. I didn't want to bother you with my problems, but your friends bully me. They jump me almost everyday but i got used to it. I deserved it. Don't think that it's all their faults because it wasn't just them. Mostly, the Sophomore and Seniors take part in bullying me but some juniors do too. So i kept it to myself because no one cares. I forgive you guys for watching mom hit me it wasn't your fault though. It was fine."
I watch as Graham get up to hug his brother and together they cried. Mrs. Mellark noticed that Rye couldn't finish the letter so she got up and snatched the letter out of his hands and finished for him.
"Dad, i forgive you for watching mom beat me with a rolling pin, or whatever she can get her hands on. I know you love her and that you don't want anything to happen to her so you watch someone you love beat your stupid son. I know you didn't want the love of your life go to jail when I am to blame. I am always to blame for everything that goes wrong and for that I am sorry. But now you can live a happy life, without me. That's what's best for everyone."
Mr. Mellark silently got up and walked out of the room most likely to cry in private. Mrs. Mellark continued to read even though she probably wanted to be comforting her husband right now.
"Annie, Finn, and Jo, you guys are my bests friends and I am going to miss you all. I know you guys felt sorry for me and that's why we became friends but I am okay with that. Annie please don't be sad I am doing this because it is better for everyone. Finn be good to Annie. Don't hurt her because you have a keeper. Jo I know you are thinking I am stupid but I think I made the right decision. I and really going to miss you all. And Jo? Please try to not kill Katniss."
Jo sat in a chair in the corner with silent tears streaming down her face. I am surprised she never cries. Ever. I look over at Finn and Annie and see Finns head buried in Annie's hair and together they cried.
"Katniss, you really don't know the effect you can have on people. I really am going to miss you Katniss. Your beautiful face, you sparkling eyes, your stubborn attitude and your love for your family. I am going to miss the way you scowl when you get annoyed, and the way you are always determined to get your way, and the way you always have to be right even if you know you are wrong. I am going to miss your laugh, your gorgeous smile, and the way you blush and look down at your feet when your embarrassed. But most importantly I am going to miss you. Please don't be upset. I do my deserve you I never will. Don't blame yourself it is not your fault. Katniss, I love you, always"
I start sobbing and I can't stop. I love him so much it hurts. Mrs. Mellark looks at me with sad eyes but doesn't stop reading the letter and everyone else doesn't stop crying.
"To the bullies, you guys won. You got what you wanted. If you tell me to kill myself enough times I will actually believe you and I do. No one should be seen with ugly me. So I did what I had to do to make that happen. Just know that this is all your fault. Everyone single one of you that bullied me you guys made me do this. When you call me all those names I believe every single word. I am just a worthless person that deserves to die because no one likes me. I just take up space and know I won't because right after I finish writing this letter I am going to end my life because of you.
Goodbye,
Peeta."
I look at Peeta and see tears streaming down his face. Is he waking up? I feel him squeeze my hand I know he is defiantly waking up. Staring at his face I watch as he slowly opens his eyes and them shut them groaning in pain. He opens his eyes again and I watch as he looks at everyone before saying "Hi." I start crying happy tears and I know I must look crazy but I don't care because Peeta is awake!
I finally say "I thought I lost you, Peeta, I love you." He just looks at me in shock before asking, "your not just saying that because you feel bad?" I shake my head before leaning up and capturing his lips in a kiss. I missed his lips so much. He pulled away a couple minutes later looking at everyone in the room. He didn't say anything instead he just burst into tears. I got up and hugged him while everyone else sat there shocked. He finally stopped crying but didn't stop shaking.
"I am sorry." He said softly. No one answered they just sat their quietly. I sat there studying Peeta when I noticed his left arm. I am sitting on his right side so I didn't notice his left arm has cuts all over.
"What is this?" I asked Peeta while pointing at his arm. He just stared at me with this frightened look. He didn't answer instead he just startedcrying again and j did everything I could to calm him done but nothing did. He finally said "I am sorry." Again. He cried himself out and fell asleep and I did soon after.