This time I won't do the reviews. I was about to do them but then my laptop crashed...so.
I only want to say that I can't update every Saturday because I'm just to busy with school and volleyball. I'll update when I can. This Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday my classes are only 40 min. long instead of 50. So I have more free time. Maybe I can update something then. I also want to say that I get help from my best friend (He doesn't have a account here) Because he knows more about this subject then I do. He used to cut himself to but he stopped.
I used (A site to translate things) To translate this chapter, so I don't know if the grammar is right. I was to lazy to translate it by myself.
This story won't be that long. Maybe it will be 7 or 8 chapters long (Or 6... Probably 7) . I already wrote the end and there won't be a sequel...
DISCLAIMER: I don't own MBAV. Otherwise there would be a season there and it won't be on Disney Channel Because I found out how much I hate it that I only can watch it on Disney Channel. I don't like Disney Channel because it only shows the ''good'' things in life. I do own the story line.
Chapter 5
I didn't know what I could do. The only thing I did was sitting on my bed and stare out for me. Maybe E... No, I don't want to call Ethan. I don't care how much I would like to call him I'm not going to do that now. That only makes it more complicated. I bet he wouldn't want to see me right now. But maybe he forgot it. Sure, the chance he would is zero comma nothing.
Maybe If I didn't said these things to him I wouldn't feel so bad right now. Maybe it was better if I him the truth. Then I might not sit here worrying over something that should have never happened. No, then I sat there ashamed to tell what I had done these past weeks. Why did both sides have something positive and negative? The positive of the choice I've made is that Ethan now won't ask anything about what happend. But maybe he'll ask more questions.
My eyes went to my phone and I saw that Ethan had already tried to call a few times . Fine, he probably wants to talk about it.
I can't avoid him forever. Maybe it is better to call him anyway.
Still with a two fight in my head I called him. Secretly I hoped that he wouldn't pick his phone up. Unfortunately it went the other way.
''Benny? '' I heard Ethan say. Apparently he didn't expect that I would call him. Then I was not the only one. '' Hey. '' I said softly. '' Why do you call me? In fact, why aren't you at school? '' I let out a sigh when he asked his questions. I already counted on this.
'' Listen, I just want to say sorry for everything that I have said to you. I didn't mean to say those things to you. I know it was not right of me to say it, it's just... '' '' The fatigue? '' He finished my fatigue . ''...Yes ... Yes that is it. '' This time it was Ethan's turn to sigh.
'' Do You really think that I let you down? '' He asked. It was quiet for a while. I did not quite know what to say. '' Uhm ...Well... '' I stuttered. '' Sometimes a little bit...But not not always ''
'' Why did you never said that before to me? I am not mad at you. We could've work this out much earlier. '' I felt a little bit better when he said that he was not mad at me. Maybe I was worrying about nothing.
'' You know what, I come to your House and then we can discuss this further. I'm sure we can come up with a solution. '' Even before I could say anything he hung up. I don't know if I should be happy that he came or nervous for what might happen.
'' Benny, Ethan is here. '' I heard Grandma calling. Hopefully this is going to be better then how it went earlier.
Not much later Ethan stepped in my room. '' do you any feel better? '' Was the first thing he said to me. I shrugged. ''There were days that I have felt better, but what can you do about it. '' Ethan nodded and came sitting next to me. With every second I became more nervous.
'' So ... can you tell me more about when you feel that I let you down? That way I can help you better. '' On Ethan's face was a friendly smiles a which made me a little more calmed down.
'' Uhm.. For example on Fridays. These were our evenings, but since Sarah comes to babysit it seems like you only think about her and you no longer concern yourself with the things you do with me. '' Ethan nodded in agreement. '' I get what you meant and I'm sorry. It's just that I have these feelings for Sarah that I never had before for someone else. '' '' Yes, yes I can see that. '' I said softly. '' Don't see it wrong I'm also happy for you if she has the same feelings for you. I'm just afraid of what would happen between us. '' Ethanholded my arm softly. ''There would never happen something between us. '' That's what he says now, but what does he says if this would really happen? '' This Was all you wanted to tell me? '' I nodded. '' Yes '' I lied.
Ethan's POV
'' Yes. '' Benny said nodding. I wanted to believe him so badly, but I heard something in his voice that made me ask myself if he was lying to me. This couldn't be everything that he wanted to tell had to be something else.
I looke at him one more time. His mouth corners were down, his eyes were dull and he looked paler . But this could all be because he didn't felt so well. Though it occurred to me that he wore sweaters and only lately that while the temperature started to go higher.
Asking him more questions now might not be such a good idea, but I need to keep this in my mind.
Thnx for reading Everybody XXX
Oh you tell me to hold on
Oh you tell me to hold on
But innocence is gone
And what was right is wrong