Chapter 8: Who are the Sirens?
Author's Note: I have no excuse. None. Forgive me.
Disclaimer: I tried to get Batman to get me FMA 'cause Batman can do ANYTHING, but he said it was against his moral code. Bastard.
Ed's POV
To say I was upset would be an understatement. I had just been tied up and DOODLED on by three girls 'cause their outfits were... immodest. Yeah, that's the word I was thinking.
"ALPHONSE!" I shouted as I walked into the hotel room we were staying at, "I'M HO-OME!" Al walked out, his armor clanking. It made me sad every time I had to hear that damn sound.
"Welcome home big-" Al stopped. Then he stared. "Ed?" He asked cautiously.
"Yes Al?" He seemed really shocked for some reason.
"Um, I know you're a teenager, and hold the position of a responsible adult, and are of legal age- but, uh, do you mind not flaunting evidence of your, um, misdeeds? It's kinda disturbing." I looked at him blankly. I could have sworn I heard a blush in his voice.
"What are you talking about Al?" I asked, wondering if my little bro was feeling okay.
"We-ell," Why was Al so nervous anyways? "I don't really want to know when you've been to the red light district, though I really hope your being safe-"
"Wait." Did my brother just say what I thought he said? DID MY BROTHER JUST SAY WHAT I THOUGHT HE SAID?! "NO- oh god Al, WHY WOULD YOU EVEN THINK THAT?!" I think My head is gonna explode from blushing. I'm pretty sure I've got smoke billowing out of my ears. Al looked relieved,
"So you are being safe, knowing you I can never really tell and I REALLY don't want details but at least I know you're safe-"
"NO!" I screamed, mortified that my little brother was having THAT conversation with me- how the hell did he even know what a red light district is? I paused- I was gonna kill Colonel Bastard. Al looked uncertain,
"So you're not being safe?" My face got redder. I was pretty sure that was impossible by that point, but hey, we Elrics are always doing the impossible.
"I'm not, I haven't, I'm not doing that." Now Al looked confused.
"But, big brother, your shirt is missing, you have writing on your chest, you look disheveled and there's a lipstick smear on your cheek."
"THERE'S A WHAT?!" I ran to the mirror to find that there was a bright red kiss mark in the dead center of my left cheek. "HOW THE HELL DID THAT GET THERE?" I shrieked. Al shrugged, looking doubtful.
"Brother-" He hesitated, "If you weren't in the red light district, then what happened? And who are the Sirens?" Sitting down to explain my night to him, I sighed. That's what I wanted to know.
(Line break~ It stole Niki's tools so it's gonna die soon~ Enjoy it while it lasts!)
Roy Mustang (AKA Colonel Bastard)'s POV
I stared at Fullmetal. Had he finally lost it?
"Who the hell," I started, and even I cold hear the skepticism in my tone, though I tried to conceal it, "Are the Sirens?" Fullmetal looked like he was going to explode. Through gritted teeth he answered the question.
"The Sirens, Bastard, are a group of what appear to be thieves and arsons. I witnessed one of their heists and gave chase, but they managed to get the drop on me. I recommend we chase them down immediately." I raised an eyebrow,
"And this sudden urge to capture house burglars has nothing to do with the kiss mark on your cheek?" I had to fight the urge to laugh, especially when Fullmetal turned dark red.
"Tha- That has nothing to with this! They BLEW UP A HOUSE! I didn't even KNOW THAT WAS THERE! AND it's some kind of weird chemical 'cause it won't come off!" As if to demonstrate his point, Fullmetal rubbed furiously at his cheek but the kiss mark didn't even smear. I raised an eyebrow- if these burglars could wast funding and resources on something as trivial as make-up, perhaps we should look into it.
Brann POV
"I AM GOING TO KILL YOU NIKI!" She had given me permanent lipstick! And it wouldn't COME OFF! I had work in a few hours and I could NOT go into the factory wearing LIPSTICK! It would send the wrong message and in a place like that, reputation is very important! Why would Niki even waste recourses on something as trivial as make-up? As a prank, duh, my mind supplied. So now I was stuck with very BOLD dark red lipstick that could be seen by a blind man. Great. Niki poked her head out from behind a corner.
"You called?" She asked sarcastically. I glowered at her.
"How. Do. I. Get. It. Off." She was starting to look nervous. Good.
"Er, um- that is, just drink some milk?" I raised an eyebrow. She sighed, "We-ell, in theory milk should get rid of it based on the chemical signature. The fats and sugars in milk should neutralize the hydrogen-based chemical compound, but, uh- Ihaven'tactuallytesteditoutyet."
"Repeat that last bit. Slowly." Milk didn't sound too bad, at least it wasn't Ed with the lipstick... that was an interesting mental image.
"I, uh, haven't exactly tested it out yet." I could feel something snap. Huh, there goes my temper. And common sense. Buh Bye~.
"YOU WHAT?!" Huh, maybe I should yell louder. I'm sure some people back in our home dimension weren't deafened by me. "Niki, what have we said about using untested experiments on Danni, yourself or me?" I asked, trying to get my temper back under control. She looked sheepishly down at her feet, scrunching her toes. Don't melt from the cute 'I'm sorry' look- don't melt from the cute 'I'm sorry' look-
"Ta not to." I give up. Glomping her, I ruffled Niki's hair the way that always annoyed her while wearing a big grin.
"Just don't do it again!" I tried to sound serious, but don't think I succeeded.
"Fine" Niki pouted, before looking contemplative, "Can I test them on Envy?" I shrugged. Why not? And there was peace again- at least until tomorrows paper came out. And in bold on the front page, the question that all of Amestris was asking now-
WHO ARE THE SIRENS?