Wow guys, your reviews are absolutely amazing. Thank you so much!
I'm sorry that this is making you cry, but glad to hear it's helping you with some of the pain.
Onward!
Disclaimer: You know the drill.
"It's you that I'm forgetting, isn't it?"
Day 38:
I honestly can't tell you how long it was before I said anything, because I threw my arms around him and started sobbing. Loud sobs, shaking me violently to the core. He was crying too. I could feel his body tremble against mine, his arms holding me tighter against him.
When we finally cried all that we could, he held my face in his hands and said three words, still not the ones I had been waiting for, but different ones that gave me hope.
"Help me remember."
Day 39:
Now that Leo knows about his amnesia, he wants me to tell him everything. It's hard to determine exactly where his amnesia starts, because he's missing some people, some years, some details. Honestly, it's all over the place. And it's frustrating and it's hard, because I can't create a timeline for this.
It's even more frustrating that I can't fix him. I'm a scientist. I fix things. This I can't. He has to fix himself. I can only try to help.
Day 40:
I'm telling him as many stories as I can remember about us. Any story, big or small. Some he'll start to remember halfway through me telling them, others he can't remember at all. I'm telling him stories from our Academy days. Thought I'd start out with the lighter stuff before talking about the changes the BUS put us through. Before the virus, before the Hydra, before Ward. Don't want to throw too many emotions at him all at once. But he looks happy. Happier than I've seen him in a long time.
Day 41:
Today he looked at me the way he looked in the pod. Like he was confessing his feelings. But he didn't say anything. I'm not sure if he even realized. His mind might not remember, but his body does.
Day 42:
He still isn't remembering much. Just a few things here and there. For the most part, he's enjoying listening to our Academy stories. And they make him laugh. His laugh is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. He's still just as obsessed with monkey's as ever. I am in love with such a brilliantly goofy man.
Day 43:
Leo is getting frustrated. He's doing everything he can to help himself, but he hasn't stirred up any new memories. I'm getting worried that he may never get them back.
Day 44:
I see Leo and Tripp talking in the living room, so quietly that I can't make out what they're saying. Tripp has his hand on Leo's shoulder, as if he's comforting him. Tripp is shaking his head, and Leo has his head in his hands. I don't know what's going on.
Day 45:
I asked Leo what he was talking to Tripp about yesterday. "Nothing" he said. Well bullocks, I know him better than that. But I don't push.
Day 46:
I asked Tripp what they had been talking about. He seemed hesitant to answer me, said it wasn't his place. But after me insisting, he said they were talking about me.
Apparently Leo thought it was a good idea to film himself while sleeping, to see if there was any sort of change. He's now aware that he mutters my name in his sleep, so he decided to talk to Tripp about it. Leo asked him if we were romantically involved, because he mutters my name. Tripp didn't know what to say, which is fair, because I wouldn't know what to say. No technically we were not involved, but if he were normal right now, we would be.
I hope Leo doesn't start ignoring me.
Day 47:
Leo watched me all day long. I pretended like I didn't notice, because I didn't want to embarrass him. But he watched me work all day, intensely. At one point he came up behind me like he used to, and asked what I was working on. When I told him, he finished half my sentence for me, then looked deep into my eyes.
I wanted to kiss him so badly.
Day 48:
Leo caught me crying today. I didn't mean for him to. I was in my bunk, crying like I do every day, and he walked in without knocking. He sat next to me and held me close, letting me cry onto his shoulder.
"This is about me, isn't it?" He asked.
When I nodded into the crook of his neck, he only held me tighter.
Day 49:
Today I showed Leo all sorts of pictures of us from our Academy days. We looked so happy in all those pictures. I don't recognize the people in the pictures anymore. I don't recognize myself.
Day 50:
I feel my heart becoming colder every day. As much as Leo is trying, it pains me so badly to have him so close, but not remember. I need him to remember. I feel like I'm dying bit by bit every day.
Day 51:
Today Coulson called us FitzSimmons again for the first time. Leo's head shot towards him and grinned. He seemed to remember something, but wouldn't say what.
Day 52:
"I remember the prank we pulled on the Operations Cadets," he said, while smiling his lovely smile. "I remember you there."
This warms a section of my heart that had frozen over.
Day 53:
He seems able to remember stories more than feelings. He can remember a few individual stories, but not the feelings that accompany them. He can't remember his feeling for me.
Day 54:
I woke in the middle of the night to get some water and heard muffled sobs coming from Leo's bunk. I pressed my ear to his door and heard him crying. "I want to remember you Jemma, I do. I'm trying so hard."
I didn't sleep the rest of the night.
Day 55:
Today we were all in the dining room, eating, when Skye brought up the Chitauri. Apparently there was some debris from The Battle of New York that was found, that someone had been hiding. Coulson got really angry and started muttering things about not wanting to have another alien virus on our hands, and Leo dropped his coffee cup and it shattered into little pieces all over the floor.
Everyone started panicking, asking if he was alright, but he wasn't responding. He was staring a hole in the table, when he finally scrunched his eyes together as if he were in pain. Then he slowly turned his head towards me and bore his eyes into mine.
"You jumped off this plane. You almost died."
I dropped my cup too.
What does it mean?!
Next chapter coming soon!
Please review!