Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto if I did wtf am I doing here and not making this the real thing? I mean really... why do I need a disclaimer saying this? Who even reads this? Who reads the disclaimers? Do they like just look to see this single word... just right there... disclaimer. There it exists in this chapter now. Don't flag me. Or remove my story... again. Also what if my disclaimer was in the middle of the chapter and they took it down because they didn't look? What can I do about that? Can I like sue for... I don't know um... never mind... unimportant... wait... will they take my story down because of this disclaimer?
P.S. Also sorry I haven't updated I haven't really been in the mood to write because during the summer I couldn't talk with my co-writer so we couldn't make any new chapters.
Chapter IV
The next day was a pretty big deal. Apparently intentional destruction of village property was a big offense. Luckily i was just a kid so they let me off this time. The next time they said i wouldn't be so lucky. To which i replied with an intimidating glare from one eye because the other was covered in bandages that the council was responsible for. Yeah, i wasn't to happy with them at the moment.
But i decided to move on. They knew the mistake they made when they saw that i wasn't phased by their torture techniques. So i decided they did what they thought they had to. And i respected that. So i went into the academy to find the most unique situation of my life. I saw Akane, Rue, Naruto, and Hinata, all standing on their desks doing the caramelldansen song like a bunch of idiots. How they got Naruto and Hinata to do it i have no idea. But stopping it would be simple. I was walking over to my desk and as i walked by Akane and Rue i kicked the desk out from underneath them while i kept walking acting like nothing happened, they fell to the ground with a large banging noise. The others stopped and sat down and Akane and Rue fixed their desks and sat down like nothing happened. I had a feeling the next few years we're going to be filled with a lot of this kind of thing. Sadly I was so completely right.
There was a little while of normalcy, or whatever you want to call what Akane and Rue do. Until the day of the massacre arrived. This was the day i would talk to Itachi and explain to him things he needed to know. And i had a feeling Akane would like to meet Tobi so i invited her. I had already met Itachi because i was friends with Sasuke. So he would recognize me from that. He would most likely try to kill me so i had to do something to keep myself safe. So i decided i would walk home with Sasuke that day. Akane would come to.
"Sasuke!'" i yelled out. "Wait up Akane and I would like to walk home with you today!"
"Why?" he responded.
"Well we just wanted to walk with you. There isn't really a reason. We just wanted to keep you company is all." I responded with a smile. I had gotten my bandages off the day after the whole desk kicking incident and to everyones amazement i was completely fine. I had shown them some off the wounds the second day of school but they were gone two days later.
"Well if that the case i suppose i can't say no." He replied. He was so much nicer before the massacre. Its too bad that would be today.
We all walked together Akane just sort of spaced out most of the time fangirling over the idea of meeting Tobi. Even though he wasn't going by that name yet. While Sasuke and i just talked about random things that came up as we walked. We eventually got to the Uchiha district where everything was just as planned. The Uchiha's were all being killed. And i could see Sasuke was very heart broken and angry when he saw the bodies of the first few clan members in the streets. It was dark because Sasuke had stayed after late while Akane and I decided we would meet him at school because we knew what day it was.
He ran fairly fast. But Akane and I were fast to. We were pretty strong ninja because of our family heritage and our training. So it was actually hard not to run faster than him. He needed to see Itachi first and vise versa. Otherwise Akane and I would die right then and there.
Eventually Sasuke got home and saw his parents while Akane and I stayed back a little. Thats when he appeared. Itachi showed up just as Sasuke walked out of the door. Thats when Akane and I ran to Sasuke's side.
"Who are these children Sasuke?" Itachi asked with his very stoic voice.
"What happened here big brother?" Sasuke asked in horror.
"I killed our clan to test my sk-"
"No you didn't."i cut him off.
"What?" he asked confused.
"Werent you ordered to do it by Danzo?" I asked deciding to play it cool.
"How do yo-" he began. "No, i was not ordered to kill my clan. I simply want-"
"No i'm pretty sure he is right. I could have sworn you were ordered to do it." Akane said interrupting him as well.
"I will kill you where you stand!" He yelled about to launch a fireball at us. While Sasuke was in the background crying like a baby.
"NO I"M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!" I heard Akane yell. And in what probably should have been my last moments i decided to go out with a facepalm because of her stupidity. "You're supposed to be a pacifist! You aren't supposed to kill people!"
"Yup were screwed." I said simply with my palm still in my face.
"Bad weasel bad!" I heard her yell.
"Why is it taking so long for him to kill us?" I asked. I then looked up at Itachi to see that he wasn't actually going to kill us although he was very annoyed with Akane for her acting like an idiot. "So you aren't going to kill us?" i asked.
"No, i was only ordered t-"
"Called it!" Akane yelled sticking her fist in the air.
"This is not the time Akane." i stated simply without even looking at her. She put her head down and pouted.
"Like i was saying i was only ordered to kill the Uchiha's and to leave the village. It is not my job to kill any non Uchiha's other than Sasuke." he was finally able to say.
"Yes i know your mission. And i also knew about your plans for Sasuke. I also knew they weren't going to work. You would only make him turn on the village so he can become more powerful and then he would vow to kill the village that made you suffer. You know for a genius, you're pretty stupid." I ranted on like that about how he was doomed to fail and he could only stare in shock.
"How do you know all of this?" He finally asked me.
"Well i could explain it to you. But i doubt it would make any sense. I know its alot to ask, but could you just accept it as the truth. And please don't tell anyone i told you this. The council is already watching me closely for knowing about the nine tailed fox and the truth behind it."
"I have a feeling that I would not believe what ever reason it is that allows you to know these things." He replied. "But i still don't believe everything you say." He added.
"Thats fine. But please leave Sasuke to me. I too am an Uchiha. Him and i together will redeem our clan. Even if they hated me."
"You are an Uchiha?" He asked.
"Yes i am. I am the one who was kicked out of the compound for being half Senju."
"I see, it is true that the Uchiha have a grudge against the Senju."
"And vise versa." I added.
"Of course. But why are you telling me these things? Just out of curiosity." he asked. I could tell he was curious of me.
"Well, to tell you the truth. You are a hero to the leaf village. And this is my home. So i wanted to thank you myself. Although i wish you could have solved this problem some other way." i answered him.
"I see. I will have to take my leave now though." Sasuke had passed out a long time ago from shock. And Akane was busy thinking about Tobi and didn't hear us talking at all. I saw her poke Sasuke with a stick a few times and she immediately stopped when Itachi glared at her.
"If you could wait a moment i have a favor to ask of you."
"I see so you did want something of me." he replied as if he had guessed it all along.
"Well not me as much as her." I said pointing back to Akane.
"Huh? What?" She said quickly.
"Nothing go back to doing whatever it is idiots do."
"Yes sir!" She said trying to be serious.
"She wants to meet the other Uchiha who is helping you. He is going by the false name of Madara." i said.
"He is not the real Madara?" He asked as if it was actually a surprise.
"Like i said. For a genius. You are pretty stupid. Madara is dead and has been for a while. Well not that long but still pretty long. A few months? A couple years? Oh well all that matters is that he is not the re-"
"Who is what now?" i heard a voice call out.
"TOBI!" i heard Akane yell as she ran up to hug him.
As she ran up it took him by surprise so he stepped back, and she almost got to hug him, until she passed through him and hit her head on the wall behind him. "Owie my head!" she exclaimed rubbing her head with her hands. "Tobi's being mean!" she said to me.
"Who is Tobi?" He questioned. "Oh well it doesn't matter you're all about to die anyhow." he said and i could tell he wasn't joking around.
"I'm too young to die! Again..."
"Again?" he said confused.
"Hit me with your best shot! Fire away!" She began singing.
"As you wish." he said ready to attack. He began to run towards her. Then she ran in the opposite direction yelling rape. "Come back and fight me coward!" he said as if it would make her change her mind. Like i said. Idiots.
"If you're done i would love to talk to you now masked man." I said confidently. My confidence was met with two fireballs flying at my face. Which although i dodged managed to explode the ground beneath me. This was not a fight i wanted to be involved in. "Sorry!" i yelled out sincerely.
"Help! Help! He's trying to eat me!" Yelled Akane. I swear it's like she wants to die.
My apology apparently meant nothing to Obito because another two fireballs were coming in my direction.
"Spammer!" I heard Akane yell. But i was a bit busy not dying so i decided not to respond.
"What does that even mean?!" Yelled Obito who i could tell was getting very aggravated by Akane.
"It means stop using the same move fricken spammer." i said out loud. And again a couple of fireballs coming my way. "Why aren't you shooting at her?!" i yelled out.
"Because Tobi's a good boy!" She yelled and then there came the fire balls at her. Itachi who finally stopped being an idiot decided to join the fight and saved her before she decided to do something like i don't know... Hug the fireballs.
"Are you two suicidal?!" yelled out Itachi in frustration.
"Lil bit!" i yelled. While at the same time Akane said maybe.
"Well let me grant your wish for death!" i heard Obito yell and at least he stopped using fire balls. It's too bad that now instead he was sending a bunch of Phoenix Flowers at me. And there were a lot more than two. I was still preoccupied with not dying.
"Can i get fries with that?!" Akane yelled.
"You know you're going to get everybody's attention this way right?!" i yelled to Obito.
"Oh yeah." he said as if he had forgotten.
I looked around and saw that almost everything was on fire. And i saw that Sasuke was running away like a little bitch. Wow, he was supposed to be a prodigy? Fuck that, i would rather be dead than live like him. Wow this is just pathet- oh crap another fireball.
"Spammer!" Akane yelled.
"NO he used a different move in between! That means the-" Crap another one. "God damn it stop spamming!"
"I have no idea what that means i am simply using what i know to win." he replied.
"Learn something new then!" Akane yelled.
"Stay out of this!" Obito yelled at her.
"Make me! You're not the bo-" and then a fireball came her way and Itachi who was still holding her at his side had to dodge the attack.
"Could you please stop making us a target?" He asked nicely.
"NO! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity" She replied.
"Yes well it is about to be the last of your life time's opportunities!" Obito yelled.
"Hey did you forget about me- oh crap stop shooting fire balls at me!" I yelled dodging from another one. How has nobody noticed this yet?! i yelled in my head.
"No i didn't forget i simply don't care about you. You are not a threat to me. I could squash you like a bug you ins-" this comment was met with a lightning bolt to the face which explode and left a small cloud of dust.
"Ha take that yo- fuck how did that not do anything?" i say as i see the dust clear and he is unscathed. "you must have let it faze through you!" i said out loud.
"No the attack was simply to weak to harm me in any way." He replied.
"Yeah thats what you want us to believe!" yelled out Akane who was now being scolded by Itachi.
"Hey what about Sas-" i heard her say and then a large yelp when he dropped her and ran off to go make sure he was okay. "I shouldn't have said anything. Now nobody is here to protect me." i heard her say to herself. Just before Obito realised it too and began to launch a couple of fireballs at her.
"Spammer!" I heard her yell before weaving a bunch of hand signs and yelling out "Lightning style! False Darkness!"
"Not in the village you idiot!" i yelled but it was too late.
"What?!" i heard Obito exclaim.
"Oh crap!" i heard her say just before a blast of lightning came from her area and blew through the fire balls. But sadly it missed Obito who made it faze through him just in time. It may have missed Obito. But it definitely didn't miss the thirty or so houses on the way out of the Uchiha compound. "Sorry I didnt mean it!" I heard her yell.
"What was that?!" i heard Obito yell as if he saw something he couldn't believe. Which he probably couldn't because... well he's stupid.
"What the?! Who was that?!" I heard Itachi from across the compound. Seriously how has nobody heard any of this?!
"You just blew up my compound!" i said to Akane.
"Whoops..." She replied.
"Whatever you're helping me fix this." i said to her.
"Good luck with that.: She whispered.
"What?!" i yelled out.
"Nothing!" She replied.
"Thats what i thought!"
"Don't ever divide your attention from a battle with me!" I heard Obito shout.
"Huh what was that- oh crap!" i yelled and jumped out of the way from a bunch of flaming Phoenix Flowers coming at me. They blew up the house i was on.
"Why should we?!" i heard Akane yell. What an idiot she is out of chakra. She really does want to die.
"Shut up!" i yelled at her.
"What did i just say-" he began.
"You to i am busy scolding this stupid ninja. Wait your turn."
"How dare you!" he yelled. Yeah i think i pissed him off. "You are only a child! How dare you act better than me!"
"Oh yeah thats right, i'm still only seven. Whoops guess i forgot about that." I said.
"You forgot?!" He yelled. Yup definitely pissed.
"I came back when i heard the exp- what the heck happened here?!' Itachi yelled looking at the massive gash in the ground where she used false darkness.
"Seriously though, how has nobody heard any of this?!" i yelled out as loud as i could. Right then a bunch of anbu finally show up. "What now you decide to show up? Seriously she blows a giant gash into the Uchiha compound and you shrug it off. I yell and you just happened to come? You are the most efficient group EVER!? i ranted on.
"We did hear it all but... We were ordered to stay away." one of them answered me.
"Fuck you. Go away. We don't need your inefficient help. You'll probably just get killed because you didn't fucking notice a giant fire ball flying at your face. Oh hey where did that come from? Well i don't know maybe the fucking enemy?!" I kept on ranting.
"Are you done sir?" He asked.
"Yeah for now." I said as if nothing happened.
"Well in that car-" He said right before he exploded from a giant fire ball to the face.
"Yup... totally called it. HEy you dumb asses you want to blow up to?" i asked.
"No sir." They answered in unison.
"Then stop talking and start dodging!' I yelled pointing to their left where another fire ball was coming from.
Yeah... they didn't make it. They blew up in a giant explosion. I didn't think they deserved to be considered hero's who gave their lives. Considering they all died in like less than five seconds.
"NO FRED!" Akane yelled out.
"Shut up none of those losers deserve the name fred!" i yelled back.
"Don't speak of your comrades like that." Itachi tried to scold me.
"How about you don't leave seven year olds to fight a fire spitting mask wearing psychopath just to see if your wimpy little brother got away." I saw him lower his head a little. Yeah don't you scold me bitch i am in no mood.
Just then a few more fireballs came in from both sides. I just let them hit me and explode. I was seriously in no mood. This village was just not working the way it should be. First my compound got destroyed. Then these weak anbu who ignored us died almost immediately after getting to the battlefield. And then someone who abandoned children to fight a psychopath just to see if his little brother was okay tried to scold me! Oh Obito you should have just teleported yourself away when you had the chance beca- "Stop shooting fire balls at me while i am ranting in my head!" I yelled to Obito.
'Make me!" he yelled back as he shot a few more.
"You run out of insults and started stealing them from kids or something?!' I yelled back.
"You stole my line!" Akane yelled out.
"You know what i think i am actually going to atta-" and just as i was about to finally release my anger on him he disappeared because the third hokage showed up.
"What is with all of this noise?!" he yelled. "The villagers are very worried and cannot see-" He noticed the giant gash in the compound. He looked over at me and i shrugged. He looked over at Akane who has the stupidest "I'm innocent" smile on her face. "Both of you are to fix this compound. And you are both going to be in charge of cleaning this village every day until you become genin!"
"But i didn't even get to blow up anything!" i yelled out.
"Well to bad you were both here when i arr-" He looked over at Itachi and realised what was going on. "I would like for you two to leave." He said immediately.
"Okay let the grown ups talk then." I said to Akane and grabbed her hand and led her out of this stupid compound. I was going to get back at her because i didn't get to blow up anything but i was still being punished.
We got out of the compound and i turned to her and yelled at her because she was an idiot and forgot she wasnt supposed to use that jutsu in the village because. Well we know why now.
"I regret nothing!" She declared.
"Yeah because you won't do any of the work and i will have to do it all you lazy bum." i said back. And then i decided to lay down on the ground and i slept. For like i don't know three, maybe four days? Whatever, it was a while. But the good news is i didn't have to go to the academy and deal with those idiots!