Chapter 13

They're in France again the second time they meet Gabriel. It's in no way intentional. One moment they're walking into a restaurant to get crepes, and the next Gabriel is waving them over to his already fully covered table – which Sam is pretty sure contains more types of sweets than this restaurant actually serves. There's no great way out of this so they join him at his table.

"I've been trying to contact you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I've kept them vague, but I've been sending you loads of messages."

"Oh! Sorry, but I've got no idea how to listen to those."

Sam has just figured out what Gabriel means. And yeah, "Angel Radio" is another on that list of angelic skills he never picked up. With a multi-sided civil war going on among the angels a way of communicating open to all listeners was pretty useless. By the time Sam got out of the pit no one was talking on "Angel Radio" anymore.

Gabriel is staring at him now, his expression a mix between shocked, confused, and blank.

"You didn't hear my messages? Forget trying to guess which of my siblings you are, now I'm just trying to figure out what's wrong with you."

The sit in an awkward silence for a while after that, Gabriel studying him intensely, and Sam feeling uncomfortable with the scrutiny.

"Well, I've decided. I'll be training you."

Sam considers this for a moment. On the one hand it will give Gabriel many opportunities to study him, but on the other he'll be getting training from an archangel, someone actually on the same power level as him. And when he thinks of the benefits – thinks of being able to heal so that Dean never gets hurt too bad again – well, there's no question what his answer is.

"Alright"

Gabriel pulls a phone from thin air and holds out his other hand for Sam's. Sam hesitates to hand his own over, already imagining all the ridiculous text messages Gabriel is sure to send him, but in the absence of "Angel Radio" this seems the most logical way to stay in contact.

The issue of Sam apparently taken care of in his eyes, Gabriel turns to look at Dean, and promptly chokes.

The other not-trickster, Sam's brother, is staring at him.

He's wheezing now that he's stopped choking, and he's staring at Dean like Dean's a leprechaun or something equally ridiculous, something that even the people who believe in supernatural beasties think is nuts to believe exists.

It's pissing Dean off. First he'd acted like there was something wrong about Sam – and Dean is firmly ignoring the number of times he himself has thought so – and now he's staring at Dean like there's something off about him too. And who the hell is he to judge? He's some annoying family member of Sam's that Sam hadn't wanted to see, and he's been insulting Sam, and he ordered Sam around, and Sam had obeyed him! It stuck in Dean's craw and he wasn't about to just let it go.

"And when is he going to have the time to train with you? We'll be healed up and hunting again soon."

"Easy. We'll have plenty of time when you're sleeping, it's not like the two of us need to."

And now Dean's staring at the non-trickster like he's the one who's crazy.

"Sam sleeps. I've seen him."

And the non-trickster is back to focusing on Sam, and he seems completely incredulous.

"Dude. You sleep?"

And Sam … Sam looks embarrassed. Sam's getting embarrassed over needing to sleep, and Dean's struck again with overwhelming curiosity about what Sam is. What kind of creature can conjure things from thin air, and teleport around the world in the blink of an eye, and doesn't need to sleep? Seriously.

The conversation has stopped, and they sit in uncomfortable silence as Sam's brother continues to look from one to the other as if they're a puzzle that if he just looks long enough will start to make sense.

It's Sam who cracks first. He stands up abruptly and pulls Dean with him out of the restaurant. He doesn't say anything as they walk down the street, and Dean figures it's up to him to start the conversation.

"I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't have told him that you sleep, huh?"

"Nah, you couldn't have known. It's just … this has been nice, but it's been kind of like a dream you know? Like we'll heal up and start hunting again, and none of this will have happened."

And Dean knows exactly what he means. He's had the feeling too. He's almost afraid for it to end, afraid they'll go back to how they were, friends, hunting partners, and nothing more. Dean doesn't want that. Cause Dean? Dean's found he really likes kissing Sam. Sam's tall, and strong, and his alpha, and it turns out that really turns Dean on, in a way he never would have expected. Dean's actually had sex before – as long as he picks up women the only way for them to tell his type is his attitude – but he's never craved it like he does with Sam, which Dean thinks is pretty messed up since he hasn't actually had sex with Sam yet.

And that's another reason he's worked up enough that he told off Sam's brother. He's frustrated. He's Sam's, Sam's his, they have been for a while now, and as soon as Dean realized just how far his own feelings went he's seen no real reason to hold back anymore … but Sam refuses to have sex with him. It's not outright refusal – he's not stopping and pushing Dean away – but Dean knows it's no coincidence that they never manage to get all the way no matter how much Dean wants them to. It's frustrating, and it worries Dean – not that he'll ever admit it. And it ratchets up his fear of losing all this once they start hunting again. He's not sure he can stand to lose what he has, when he's never even gotten all he wants.

But hunting is about saving lives, and no matter how Dean dreads going back, the victims are more important than any insecurities he may have.

Published: June 9, 2013