They lowered Phil's coffin into the ground. Dan could hear Phil's mum gently sobbing into her husbands shoulder.
When it was Dan's turn to throw some earth on Phil's coffin Dan had the urge to jump down there with him and lay there, dead, under the earth with Phil forevermore.
Eventually people started to peel away from the group and make their own ways to the wake. Dan's mum said that she'd leave him alone, and see him when he'd made his own way to the wake. Dan stayed knelt in front of Phil's freshly buried grave. Then he felt his body shake from the inside, tears were beginning to pour down his face. His hands gripped his hair and he dug his fingernails into his scalp. Then the scream, which had been building within him, finally ripped from him. He couldn't stop, he didn't want to stop; it was some sort of release that he craved. He knew it couldn't really make him feel better. Nothing could ever do that. He would never feel happiness or pleasure or joy again.