The Troll Investigation
Albus Dumbledore waited in the Entrance Hall for the arrival of his 9:30 appointment. It was frustrating for this to be happening again, but…
"Ah, Amelia," he said pleasantly as the main door opened.
"Good morning, Albus," Amelia Bones said, shaking his hand. "I believe you know Rufus Scrimgeour? He'll be taking over as Head of the Auror Office when I take over as Director of the DMLE in the New Year."
"Professor," Scrimgeour said, reaching out his hand for Dumbledore to take. "Amelia tells me that these matters can be a little delicate?"
Dumbledore sighed. "Yes, indeed," he said. "It's because of all the different enchantments here in Hogwarts, and of course the myriad inhabitants. Would you like to come up to my office?"
"Certainly," Bones agreed. As they walked, she kept talking to Scrimgeour. "You see, Hogwarts ends up being invaded by some mildly dangerous creature every few years. We, naturally, have to investigate. So far, every single one of these invasions has been traced to the poltergeist, except for the rabid flobberworm invasion two years ago, due to the Weasley twins, although no-one has worked out how they did it. And I believe there was a Niffler incident about twenty years ago due to James Potter and his friends."
"There was the Hebridean Black forty-five years ago," Dumbledore added. "That interesting. One of the Quidditch teams, Hufflepuff I believe, tried to capture a school mascot in the post-match euphoria of winning, but Professor Kettleburn dealt with it easily enough. And of course the disaster of the pantomime attempt sixty years ago."
"How is Professor Kettleburn?" Bones asked.
"I'm afraid he's reached the point of only teaching the theory," Dumbledore said sadly. "Hagrid has been helping with the practical aspects, but Kettleburn dearly wishes he could hand over to someone else and retire. Alas, his fate has scared off any potential applicants. Wilhemina Grubbly-Plank is willing to do short stints, but doesn't like to leave her husband and children for long periods at time."
They reached the gargoyle, which slid aside allowing them to ascend. They fell silent until they were safely ensconced in the office.
"So, where do you want to begin?" Dumbledore started.
"Let's quickly run through what happened, then see where that takes us," Bones said.
"Of course," Dumbledore nodded. "It was the Halloween Feast. Professor Quirrel burst in, screamed about a troll in the dungeons, and fainted. I sent the students back to their dorms, and led the teachers in search of the troll. Unfortunately, the troll had left the dungeon, entered one of the girls' bathrooms, and encountered a first year named Hermione Granger. However, her two friends Harry Potter and Ron Weasley managed to subdue it shortly before we arrived."
"Sounds fairly standard," Bones nodded. "Any idea how the troll got in?"
Dumbledore shook his head. "It came from the local clan of mountain trolls, and someone seems to have compelled it through one of the doors they'd left open. There were no noticeable residues, and Peeves hasn't taken credit yet, but he has been known to refuse to say so for some months."
"Why did you send the students back to the dorms?" Scrimgeour added. "Wouldn't the Great Hall have been more defensible?"
"It may seem so, but there was a nasty piece of enchantment placed over the Great Hall some five hundred years ago," Dumbledore sighed. "It allows any being, and even some beasts – including trolls – free entry into the Great Hall. The dorms have the best defences against forced entry."
"But the Slytherin and Hufflepuff dorms are in the dungeons," Scrimgeour protested.
"I sent Professors Sprout and Babbling with the Hufflepuffs, and Professors Vector and Sinistra with the Slytherins," Dumbledore answered. "In addition, most students of fourth year or above should be able to at least mount a defensive action to hold until help can arrive."
"What about Professor Snape?"
Dumbledore coughed. "Severus, as you know, has…quite some experience with the Dark Arts," he said apologetically. "I do not wish for him to be put in a position of being provoked into using them in front of the unfortunately impressionable students."
"Well, that all seems to be in order," Bones said. "The issue of the first year being in the bathroom, however…"
"She claims that she went hunting for the troll, but she was missing from her last class and the Feast," Dumbledore said morosely. "I am afraid she has had some difficulties adjusting. In future, however, we will check we know where every student is first."
"A reasonable precaution," Scrimgeour nodded.
"Then I believe we can say that this is wrapped up," Bones said, standing. "Thank you for your time, Albus."
"A pleasure, Amelia," Dumbledore said. "Allow me to escort you out."
AN: Everyone always treats the Troll Incident as a terrible example of Hogwarts' lax security. Here are a few more innocent ideas. Regarding Amelia Bones, we don't know when she became Director of the DMLE, but I wanted to have someone who knows the drill (bad things happen at Hogwarts all the time; it's not hard to deal with) and someone who's learning the ropes. The flobberworm incident, the niffler incident and the Hebridean Black incident are made up by me, and the pantomime incident is from The Tales of Beedle the Bard.