Hello my darlings!

Here's another chapter for you, and another tip of the veil lifted :D It's a mostly transitional/filler chapter, and after my exams are finished, I'll be quick to work on the next one.

Thank you to JustSmileBFF and DancingDoula for beta'ing this for me and listening to my rants about OUAT, Captain Swan and life in general.

R&R, darlings! It feeds the musie-she's a greedy little bitch ;)

Love, Annaelle

PS Thank you to all those who have read, faved, followed, reviewed and loved already! I love all of you!

Chapter Three—Blackbird

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to be free

Blackbird fly, blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night

—Blackbird, The Beatles

The Enchanted Forest—several years into the future

"Where's Mama?"

Ruby pastes a smile onto her lips and kneels down before the precious six-year-old, gently playing with Leia's wild curls as she contemplates how to answer the girl's inquiry.

She can't tell Leia that her mother is holed up in her bedroom, refusing to eat and drink and come out to see anyone—Leia is a precocious, smart little girl, who is far more observant than anyone gives her credit for, and she is always worried when she sees Emma sad.

And unfortunately, Emma being sad and desolate is no rare occurrence these days. Ruby can hardly remember the last time she'd seen Emma truly smile—then again… None of them have had much occasion to feel joyous for a while.

She too still feels the sharp pain of losing her best friend and her grandmother as though it had happened only yesterday, despite the nearly seven years that have passed. She sighs heavily before offering Leia a small smile as she explains that Emma isn't feeling very well today, so Leia will have to play with Ruby for the day.

Leia frowns a little, her forehead wrinkling adorably as she thinks deeply before nodding and smiling radiantly. "Okay," she grins, "Can we go outside?"

Ruby smiles—yes, Leia really is her parents' daughter.

Leia has hated the castle walls from the moment she was old enough to realize that there was an entire world out there. Ruby remembers the first time she took Leia to the village—she'd almost needed a leash to make sure she would not lose Leia at least half a dozen times. She'd loved the market and the people and the food—she adored the docks and the ships.

Whenever Ruby would stay with Leia for a day—or a few days—she would take Leia out of the castle, into the village and to the docks.

Sometimes, Ruby wishes she would have known Killian better; wishes she would have more stories to tell Leia about her father… Unfortunately, only Emma truly knew Killian, and she is barely capable of speaking his name without reverting to a near catatonic state.

And while Leia is smart and astute for her age, she cannot truly understand why her mother is almost constantly sad—even though Leia does know that her father passed away and that her mother misses him very much, just like her grandfather misses her grandmother very much.

Ruby considers herself quite lucky—she may not have found her True Love, but at least she has not lost him either.

She has seen the devastating effects of losing one's True Love with both Emma and David, and she can only pray that she will never have to face that kind of pain—she's not sure any amount of time shared with her True Love would be worth the amount of pain and suffering she'd feel if she were to ever lose him.

"Go get your cloak and good boots," Ruby orders softly, once again pushing a stray dark curl from Leia's forehead, "And bring a ribbon so I may braid your hair before we leave."

She grins as Leia squeals excitedly before taking off towards her chambers, skipping the entire way.

She loves that Leia is so exuberant, so full of life—like her parents had been, before the Snow Queen had put an abrupt end to their happiness.

When Leia returns, hopping on one leg to put on her boot, her cloak hanging off her shoulder haphazardly and her curls flying about wildly, Ruby laughs, shaking her head as she moves to help the little girl get dressed properly.

Her fingers linger on the silver necklace that is now around Leia's neck, far too long for her—it nearly reaches her waist—a necklace that is hauntingly familiar. "Where'd you get this, sweetie?" She asks quietly, playing with the skull and cross curiously.

"Mama gives it to me," Leia says with a small smile, and Ruby doesn't bother correcting her small grammar mistake—Leia speaks almost flawlessly, unless she's really excited or emotional, which is when she sometimes messes up her sentences. It's adorable though, so no one bothers to correct her when she does it.

"It is Papa's," Leia announces proudly, "Mama says I should have it."

Ruby swallows thickly and smiles at Leia, tying up her unruly curls into a quick ponytail instead of the braid she'd intended earlier and getting to her feet—she doesn't want Leia to start asking too many questions about Killian…

She won't know how to answer them truthfully, and she doesn't want to disappoint the girl.

"Come, sweetheart," she smiles, "Let's go down to the market place before all the good things are gone—and then we can get sweet rolls and watch the ships."

She giggles at Leia's excited squeal and watches as the girl sprints down the hallways to the large front doors faster than a speeding bullet—she has no idea where that girl gets her energy, but she hopes she'll have burned most it off by noon.

Sometimes, she feels oddly like Leia is partly her own daughter as much as she is Emma's daughter, and every time she sees Emma and Leia together, she feels guilty for loving Leia the way she does, because Ruby knows how much Leia means to Emma, even if Emma isn't all that good at showing it anymore—and Leia adores her mother more than anything else in the world.

Though Henry might be running as a close second as Leia's favourite person in the world.

Ruby sighs sadly and once again wishes Snow and Killian would still be with them—wishes that she would have some kind of guidance in how to deal with Leia.

How to be careful in not replacing Emma as Leia's mother.

It's not going to be easy—but Ruby loves Emma and Leia and Henry and David and little Graham—so she's going to try.

Emma is doing the best she can for Leia—and it is enough.

Leia loves Emma.

It is as it should be.

Ruby nods to herself to assure herself she has made the right decision, before she chases after Leia, smiling—despite her somewhat conflicted feelings—at the prospect of spending the entire day with little Leia.

.

.

.

Storybrooke, Maine—present time

She awakes to a strange beep. It resounds through the empty space in her head and echoes through her entire body. Something is wrong—that much she can tell. She isn't sure where she is, or how she got here in the first place—she remembers Killian and their night at Granny's and fighting with Regina and then Anna turning up and going to find Elsa and then….

Nothing.

She takes a deep breath again, desperately attempting to remember anything beyond kissing Killian goodbye before she and Anna left to find Elsa.

The mere thought of Killian proves to be all too distracting though.

She's not sure why he can evoke such powerful emotions within her; but it seems that, as soon as she recalls his hauntingly beautiful blue eyes, all she can think about is how he is always able to anticipate what she needs before she knows she needs it—how he's always able to make her smile, even in the worst of circumstances.

The resounding and awfully irritating beep interrupts her thoughts once again, and she wants to frown. She would have frowned, if her body would cooperate. But her limbs are heavy, and she feels like something is pressing down on her chest, making breathing a lot harder.

What on earth is going on?

Slowly, she tries to open her eyes. It hurts—almost feeling as though her eyes have been glued shut before she tries to open them again—but she manages in the end. Her surroundings are unfamiliar and dark, lines blurring as she furiously blinks, trying to blink away the sleep in her eyes.

Slowly, her eyes adjust to the darkness around her. She can safely say she is not in her bedroom, nor in Killian's room at Granny's, as she'd briefly hoped she would be. She studies the room she's in and comes to the startling conclusion that she's in a hospital—the annoying beep that had woken her up is a heart monitor.

She fumbles around, feebly moving her hand back and forth over the sheets, looking for the buzzer to call a nurse. Her body aches all over, and she isn't sure how that happened. She didn't go drinking with her pirate, right? And besides, alcohol poisoning doesn't make you feel like you've been in an accident, does it? Finally, her fingers bump against the cold plastic of the buzzer, and after a bit of fumbling, she manages to curl her fingers around the device.

She pushes the button quickly, wishing desperately for a nurse or even Whale to just show up and tell her what the hell had happened.

Before she really gets the chance to contemplate the overall weirdness of the situation, the door to her room opens and a tall, fair-skinned woman in a nurse's outfit walks in, sporting a concerned expression.

Emma exhales in relief and opens her mouth to ask what is going on, but the woman speaks before she gets the chance.

"Oh, Sheriff," she sighs in relief, a friendly smile plastered on her face as she hurries to Emma's side, "Don't try to talk just yet. We had to intubate you, and your throat will still be a little raw from that. You need to drink some water first. You gave everyone quite the scare, Sheriff—your Captain refused to leave your side the entire time. That is until you father made him leave to shower and eat. I expect he'll be back soon."

Emma frowns slightly at the sudden influx of information, but allows the woman to lift the cup to her lips, letting the delicious cold liquid slide down her throat. She drinks more eagerly, chokes slightly and winces when a bolt of pain shoots through her body.

Her ribs ache after coughing and she wants to know what is going on.

"Wh—what happened?" She manages to ask, though it does hurt a lot, like the nurse had warned her. The woman smiles uneasily and shakes her head. "Try to rest some more, Sheriff, I'll call your family to let them know you finally woke up." With that terribly confusing statement, the nurse leaves the room, leaving Emma to think about the things she has learned up until now.

To be honest, it isn't a lot.

She is now positive she doesn't just have a killer hangover after going out with Killian—things just aren't adding up. She'd been intubated, her entire body feels like it's been steamrolled and the way the nurse had spoken, it sounds like she had been out for more than just a few hours.

Going over the list of clues she had gotten in her head, she tries to remember what had happened before she blacked out. She'd been talking—or casually trying to pump more information—with Anna when they'd stumbled upon an ice trail leading into the woods… Anna had convinced her to text either Killian or her dad where they were going… And then… Nothing.

She can't remember…

She lets out a frustrated sigh. Why can't she remember? What the hell happened? How long has she been out? Why won't the nurse tell her anything?

With those questions burning in her mind, she falls into a light, restless sleep once again.

.

.

.

Her life was no longer of value. The moment she had seen Killian walk into her hospital room, his smile wide and relieved as he saw her, but his eyes slightly bloodshot and red-rimmed, she had known. She had simply known that she did not want to know what had happened.

She had felt tears burn in her eyes before Killian had even spoken the words—words that made her feel sick with guilt, despite Killian's constant assurances that what happened had not in any way been her fault—she'd been unconscious for four days.

Four whole days.

"I'm so sorry," Killian had whispered, tears gathering in his eyes, "I am so sorry, love—there was nothing we could do. Regina saved those she could but…" He trails off, his voice breaking slightly, and Emma had been reminded that he had lost one of the few friends he had in Storybrooke.

"Unfortunately," Killian had continued, "Regina was too late to aid Miss Lucas. She passed before Regina managed to get inside the Diner." Emma felt as though the ground had been ripped from underneath her, and the world had stopped spinning.

At first, she hadn't been capable of feeling anything—it was almost as though she was simply empty.

Ruby couldn't be gone.

She was far too young, too vibrant, too full of life to be gone.

She. Can't. Be. Dead.

But as the minutes ticked by—after she had asked Killian to go, to go check on her mother and father, to tell them she is awake—memories had started trickling into her mind.

Painful, heart wrenching, terrifying memories—memories of how she and Anna found Elsa, of Elsa being startled and then erecting an icy cage around her, trapping her inside for hours… Of intense cold, of freezing to death and being so scared of dying, because she hadn't even really lived yet, of hope surging when Killian found her—memories of those hopes shattering when the ice surrounding her didn't, of realizing she loves him, realizing that she'll never get to tell him how loved he is…

And then the memory of giving into the darkness because she was too weak to hold on any longer.

And now… Now she is simply numb.

Nothing matters anymore—and how can it anyway?

Ruby is dead because of her—she's the Savior, and she had been lying in a hospital, completely useless while an evil Snow Queen attacked her town, tried to kill her mother and baby brother.

Obviously, this is how the future Anna is from started—Ruby is simply the first casualty in a war Anna says will claim many of her friends and family. Some Savior she is—she's messing up so badly, someone had to come back from the future to make sure it didn't happen…

And even that doesn't seem to be working.

"Mom?"

She looks up in confusion, frowning as she sees Henry lingering in the doorway of her room, his eyes as red-rimmed and bloodshot as Killian's had been—as her own undoubtedly are, by now—and she chokes out a sob she didn't even know she was holding back as Henry rushes in to hug her.

She breathes him in, wrapping him tightly in her arms—she almost lost him.

He almost lost her.

She can't let that happen—she's got to fight; she has to start fighting to make her own future instead of blindly following Anna.

Her resolve strengthens when Henry whispers, "I was so scared, mom."

She's done letting the villains come at them.

This time, she's going to take the fucking fight to them.

.

.

.

The Charming loft, Storybrooke, Maine—at that same moment

Killian offers Snow what he hopes is a comforting smile as he rocks the little princeling in his arms—he is all too well aware of the kind of agony she is facing right now, and he would never have wished it upon anyone.

He is very worried for his Swan, but he knows she needs time and space—she needs to process and she needs to do it alone.

He does not, however, have any intention of allowing her to go through the loss of Ruby Lucas on her own—with that in mind, knowing she would oppose his own presence at that moment, he had sent the lad over, knowing that Emma needed to see Henry as much as the lad needed to see her.

And perhaps Emma had been right—it does seem like the Royal couple needs his help more than she does at this time. After all, from what he understood, Ruby had been a close friend to both David and Snow, and watching her friend die in her stead had shocked the young Queen in such a manner that she had yet to say a word other than Ruby's name—she cannot even bring herself to hold the little princeling for very long because she is still shaking so hard.

He has not seen Anna since the news of Ruby's passing had reached them, and he finds himself slightly worried for the girl—he had seen the flash of crippling grief in her eyes before she had schooled her features into a cool mask of indifference that was so startlingly similar to Emma's, it confirmed most of his suspicions.

He sighs quietly and smiles tightly when David sits next to him on the steps leading to Emma's bedroom, knowing there is nothing he can say that will ease David and Snow's pain. Instead, he offers his mate little Graham back, certain that holding his son will help ground David a little.

"Thanks," David says gruffly, cradling his youngest in his arms, "For everything. I know you'd rather be with Emma, but I appreciate you being here."

Killian is somewhat floored by David's words—he supposes it should not surprise him, these bloody Charmings always manage to catch him off guard—but nods and squeezes David's shoulder before he gets to his feet. "I'm sorry to leave now, mate," he explains when David looks confused, "but I wish to find our time-traveling friend… I fear she might be quite upset at this turn of events too. I have not seen her in two days."

The Prince nods in understanding and offers him a sad smile. "When you go see Emma later," the Prince says quite matter-of-factly, "tell her we love her, and that we will be there tomorrow to see her."

He simply nods and offers both Royals one more smile before he sweeps out the door, determined to find his little time-traveling friend (he dares not think of her in a different fashion just yet, because he is not yet certain, he is frightened of hoping his suspicions might be correct).

.

.

.

Storybrooke Beach, Storybrooke, Maine—Present time

"How long have you known?"

The way she poses the question—quietly, resignedly—unnerves him for a short moment before he moves to sit against the wall next to her, silently offering her his flask of rum. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he's aware how wrong giving her alcohol should feel to him, but he knows she needs it.

He's impressed when she downs the liquid without so much as flinching.

He leans his head back against the wall and sighs, accepting the flask from her when she holds it out to him. "I think I have known all along," he finally replies, turning to look at her. He remembers the moment it had to have hit him.

It was when she had attempted to convince David to just go save Emma from Elsa's icy temper, and she had looked so like his Swan, it had hit him—and it had been in that moment that he realized how alike they were. How similar their facial structure was, how they even moved and laughed in the same way.

He's not lying to Anna when he tells her he thinks he's known all along—he has, subconsciously—known all along that there was something about Anna that was too familiar, too real. But it hadn't been until that moment that he had actually realized it.

Anna snorts a little, wiping at her tears quietly as she stares blankly at the wall ahead of them. "She wasn't supposed to die," she whispers, clutching at the necklace around her neck in a move that reminds him all too much of Emma, "She was alive when I was born... She raised me when mom couldn't—she raised Graham when David couldn't. She's supposed to be alive, Killian—papa."

Her voice breaks, and he winces at the pure longing in her voice.

It's a longing he knows, a longing he's felt too, and a longing he once swore he would never make his children endure.

It's a pledge he feels truly shamed to have failed at.

He doesn't speak—he doesn't think there is anything he can say that will aid her with her plight—and simply draws her into his arms, allowing her to cry on his shoulder. "I've got you, lass," he whispers as he rocks her in his arms, "I've got you. It's alright."

It's not.

It is not even remotely alright—he had not known the wolf girl very well; had not often spoken to her, though he did consider her a friend—but she had been young and beautiful and her life had barely even begun before the Snow Queen had cruelly ended it.

And, knowing that the woman had been responsible for helping Anna—his daughter—grow into the beautiful, brave woman that is here with him right now, makes it hurt more. Makes him feel horrible for not having taken the time to get to know her, for not having had the opportunity to thank her for saving Snow's life—for saving Emma's.

"One time," Anna whispers, and she speaks so quietly Killian is not certain she means for him to hear her, "when I was six, she took me to this little hill overlooking the docks, to watch the ships…" She trails off, another tear slipping down her cheek, "And she fell asleep. I snuck away, to the actual docks, because I wanted to have an adventure—I wanted to sail away and see the whole world." She snorts a little, and he can tell she feels a little silly for her mischievousness as a child.

"I almost snuck onto a naval ship when she found me—chewed me out for running off unchaperoned… She didn't take me out to see the ships for months after that—I believe people in this world call it being grounded."

He smiles a little, hugging her to his side as he presses a kiss to her hair, but remains quiet otherwise, allowing her to reminisce about the woman who had helped his Swan raise his daughter when he was obviously not there to do it.

He does not linger on that—he knows what it means, and he does not wish to think too much about it.

He's well aware of how short life can be, and though the idea of his happiness being ended so soon after he has finally found it is more than a little disheartening, he refuses to let it guide his actions—he understands now why Anna had refused to tell them who lost their lives in the battle with the Snow Queen.

It can be quite dismaying.

"Pa—Killian?" Anna's voice is soft and he nearly misses it—but then she's looking up at him and all he can see is blue, blue eyes so much like his own and his brother's.

"Aye, love?"

"My name," she hesitates, "My name isn't Anna. It's Leia."