It's Comin' on Christmas
A/N - Thanks for reading! Only one chapter left.
Chapter 3
Chloe's eyes widened almost comically as she stepped further into Aubrey's luxurious apartment.
"I don't think the doorman wanted to let me in." she said, dumbstruck as she glanced around her surroundings. "I think he thought I'm a burglar. Aubrey…this place is gorgeous. I'm a little afraid to touch anything."
"Oh don't worry." Aubrey replied with a dismissive wave. "The property has already been settled. Feel free to break anything you like."
Chloe still timidly surveyed her surroundings after the blonde had taken her coat. "You live here? I bet my whole apartment could fit in your guest bathroom."
"Probably." Aubrey replied with a slight smirk.
Chloe rolled her eyes and chuckled. She took an offered glass of wine after following Aubrey to the spacious kitchen, complete with granite countertops and high end appliances. Whatever the blonde was cooking them for dinner smelled delicious.
"So…should we trash the place? Does James still have stuff here that we can cut up throw out the window?"
Aubrey shrugged. "James hasn't even stepped foot in here for nearly a year. Everything here is mine. I got this place, along with a $750,000 cash settlement, and he got the penthouse across town that he's been living in with the new woman. You're still welcome to trash the place if you like though. In fact, you'll make Silas the doorman's day if you prove him right about you. I think he gets bored."
Chloe chuckled at the blonde's smirk. The sight of Aubrey relaxed and joking was enough for the redhead to let any disparaging comment about James die on her lips. She glanced around again until her gaze settled on a calendar on the refrigerator. She smiled and bit her bottom lip at the sight of the days crossed off in red.
"Counting down to Christmas…or to your vacation?"
Aubrey startled and snapped her eyes to the refrigerator. She exhaled a shaky breath, hopefully without the redhead's notice. "Something like that. So when are you heading home for Christmas?"
If Chloe realized the obvious shift in topic she didn't mention it. Instead, a sad look flashed over her face and she took another sip of her wine. "Oh I'm not. I haven't been working long enough to really save up and flights to Florida are crazy expensive. So I'm just going to go home in a few months and spend Christmas here. My first Christmas in the city! Ashley and I are going to have a sort of beggars Christmas, it'll be great!"
"Chloe," Aubrey replied softly, "I could buy you a plane ticket home…I'd be happy to."
The redhead smiled and stepped closer to where Aubrey was checking the dinner on the stove, attempting to appear nonchalant. "That's really sweet of you." She replied, still smiling tenderly. "But I'm ok staying here. Some of the kids will be here through the holidays and like I said, Ashley can't go home either. Plus…you're here until Christmas Eve night so…this is where I want to be."
Aubrey clenched her jaw and refused to meet Chloe's gaze. "Well, if you change your mind."
"Bree," Chloe said patiently, smiling wider when the blonde finally glanced up in surprise at hearing her old nickname, "I'm not going to change my mind. I meant what I said…now that I've found you, I'm not about to let you get away again. I promised to behave, but I can still make my intentions clear."
The blonde grimaced and once again dropped her gaze. "You say that now…but a lot has changed…I've changed! I'm not a good person Chloe, you don't know what I've done."
"Then tell me." Chloe replied, unfazed. "You don't scare me Aubrey Posen Phillips. You're a good person. And I plan to keep reminding you of it."
The blonde clenched her jaw and squared her shoulders as she stood to her full height, finally turning to face Chloe. She wasn't certain whether she wanted to intimidate the redhead or simply appear strong in her own right. But she eyed the other woman almost coldly just the same.
"I helped negotiate a settlement in favor of a pharmaceutical company that knew of the risks and side effects of a certain drug that would make billions of dollars for them. They had to pay out a fraction of a percentage of their profits but the victims were irreparably harmed and no amount of money could ever come close to making them whole again. And I helped a company acquire a building for practically nothing that used to be a retirement community. The people living there were forced out with no place to go. I did that. And not because of my father. I did it because I could, because it proved I was a good attorney. And that's just the beginning Chloe. I'm a damn good attorney and people, good people, have suffered because of it."
Chloe had paled slightly but she too stood her ground. "Are you sorry for it? Do you regret it?"
Aubrey wanted to deny it. She wanted to say that she didn't regret a single thing that she had done but she knew there was no way on earth that she could possibly even pretend that she was living with no regrets. It seemed regrets were all she had left. Her family had finally, officially disowned her once they learned of her split from James. Chloe had gone. Her marriage had failed. She had done terrible things in the course of the duties of her career that weren't necessary. All she had left were regrets. That was why she had made the decision that she had. On Christmas Eve night, she would jump from the bridge that crossed the river in the park near her apartment. It was one of her favorite spots. It was where she wanted to die and finally be at peace.
She felt her bottom lip quivering as she tried to convince Chloe that she in fact had no regrets. But even if she had voiced it, the redhead wouldn't have believed her. She knew her too well. She was the only one who did. And so, Aubrey nodded.
Chloe's lips curved into a sympathetic smile. She stepped closer and took Aubrey's hands in her own. "Then you volunteer. You donate that crazy smart brain of yours to help people. We can even do it together if you want. You're not past saving Aubrey. No one is but especially not you."
They stood, their gazes locked. Aubrey didn't second guess herself, didn't give herself time to reconsider. She simply closed the distance between them and dipped her head to press her lips to Chloe's. She snaked an arm around the redhead's slight frame and pulled her flush against her own body.
Chloe moaned into the kiss and clutched at Aubrey's back, desperate to get closer to the taller woman. She fisted the blonde's shirt in her hands and pressed herself as close to Aubrey as she could get. But when the blonde stepped back and began to steer her out of the kitchen she didn't protest.
Aubrey took her hand and pulled the shorter woman behind her until they came to a stop in her bedroom. The open windows held a view of the vast city skyline. But Chloe barely spared it a second glance as she once again stared up into the gray green eyes that were gazing back at her with unwavering intensity.
"Chloe…"
"Shhh." The redhead replied in a hushed voice.
She pressed her fingers to Aubrey's lips, silencing her. As she slid her fingers down from the blonde's mouth, she let them trail over her chin and lightly scratched at the taller woman's neck before fisting the collar of her shirt and once again pulling the other woman closer.
With one fist still clenching Aubrey's shirt and the other snaking up her neck to cup the blonde's jaw, Chloe tilted Aubrey's face downward to meet her own. "I love you." She whispered, just as their lips ghosted against each other in the dark.
Aubrey wrapped her arms around Chloe's waist once again, never breaking the kiss. "I love you too. I always will…Please don't ever forget that, no matter what happens."
She felt Chloe smile against her lips as the shorter woman gently pulled her back toward the huge bed.
xxxx
Aubrey blinked her eyes open and sighed. The arm flung across her waist flexed and pulled her tighter against the body spooned behind her. Aubrey bit her bottom lip and let her mind wander back to the previous night.
Their breathy moans and pants had faded away until the only sound that remained was the soft rhythm of their heartbeats. Aubrey had laid awake long after Chloe's breathing had evened out into that of sound sleep. She had blinked away tears and clutched the redhead tighter as the night wore on until she too finally drifted off.
Aubrey had told herself she wouldn't let anything happen with Chloe. She knew it wasn't fair to the other woman to allow her to get close only to disappear again, this time for good. But Aubrey hadn't been able to resist herself. As selfish as it was, she was desperate for one brief bit of happiness before her life ended. And she did know that it was selfish.
The blonde shifted, rolling onto her back. Chloe mumbled in her sleep but didn't wake. Instead, she draped herself over Aubrey, wrapping her arms around her tightly.
Aubrey too draped her arm across Chloe's bare shoulders and lightly ran her fingers through long red locks. A short time later, Chloe sighed and squeezed Aubrey, her head resting just under the blonde's chin.
"Good morning." She said in a sleepy whisper.
Aubrey smiled somewhat sadly and gently scratched at Chloe's scalp. "Good morning."
The redhead turned her face to glance up at the woman in her arms. "Did you sleep ok?"
"I did." Aubrey responded quietly, still lightly toying with Chloe's hair. "You?"
Chloe nodded with a smile and once again dropped her head to Aubrey's chest, the soft thump of her heartbeat sounding in her ear. "Better than I have in years…I'm so glad that I found you again."
When Aubrey didn't respond, Chloe fought to keep the frown from her face. She had hoped this would be a new beginning for the pair. But she couldn't help but feel that instead of bringing them closer together, their night had only served to push them further apart.
"Aubrey?"
"Yeah?" The blonde replied, swallowing against the lump in her throat.
Chloe once again squeezed the woman in her arms, afraid to lift her head to meet her gaze. "Are you ok? The divorce couldn't have been easy on you and I just came rushing in…I didn't mean to pressure you or…you know how I am, boundaries and all that. But I would never want to push you into something. I just thought…I just assumed that you felt the same way I do. If you don't…I get it. And I'll stop pressuring. I really do just want you to be ok and happy, even if I'm not the one who can make you happy."
"Chloe…you've pretty much been the only person who could ever make me happy." Aubrey replied. "You were the first person to ever make me feel loved. And you stuck with me even when I was…a mess. The only time I've ever felt loved was with you."
Chloe lifted her head then and turned to gaze at the blonde beneath her, her own brow furrowed. Aubrey continued before the shorter woman could utter a sound.
"That's…too much pressure on you, it wasn't fair."
"Aubrey…you make it sound like you were a burden to me or something. But the truth is…I didn't know what it was to love until I met you. You were there for me too. I like to think we were a perfect complement to each other, neither of us complete without the other. That's what love is supposed to be really. Just two flawed people, choosing to love each other, flaws and all."
Tears stung Aubrey's eyes as she glanced anywhere but at the redhead eyeing her lovingly. She finally forced a watery smile to her face. "I want to show you something…will you go somewhere with me?"
"Of course I will." Chloe replied softly. "Anywhere."
xxxx
Aubrey squeezed Chloe's hand that was clutched in her own. She came to a stop on the stone bridge that crossed the river in the park near her apartment. It was her favorite spot. She often walked here alone, never bringing anyone with her, never feeling she had anyone to share it with.
She leaned and braced herself on the stone railing and gazed down into the river below them. "This is my favorite place in the city."
Chloe moved to stand next to her and mirrored her position, rested her arms on the waist high stone railing. She gazed out at the area, smiling softly at her peaceful surroundings. "It's beautiful."
Aubrey's lips quirked into a smile and she nodded, still gazing out across the river. "I wanted you to see it, because I love it." She turned and stared deeply into Chloe's clear blue eyes. "If something were to ever happen…this place is here and I love it. And I just wanted you to see it."
Chloe quirked a brow, knowing the blonde was trying to tell her something but unsure of what. So she simply smiled sweetly and stepped closer to the woman she loved. "Thank you for sharing this place with me. Will you come someplace with me now?"
Aubrey felt her heart clench painfully at the love so plainly reflected back at her from Chloe's mesmerizing blue eyes. She nodded, finding herself unable to deny the redhead anything, much like their previous days together back at Barden. The blonde would have done anything to see a smile grace the shorter woman's beautiful features, even relinquish control of the Bellas to a certain petite brunette, even if it had taken some extreme measures including an all out brawl in the practice space. She only wished she'd had the nerve to trust in their love and not buckle to her father's never ending pressure.
Aubrey nodded and took Chloe's hand in her own. "Sure. Where to?"
Chloe's smile simply widened and Aubrey felt her insides turn to mush.
xxxx
Aubrey couldn't keep the grin from her face as the handful of grade school children singing off key bellowed from their positions where Chloe was directing them in practicing their Christmas program songs.
The kids were watching Chloe's every move and direction, eager to please the redhead. Aubrey let her gaze settle on Chloe, a sudden rush of warmth spreading throughout her body as she watched the other woman smiling as she mouthed the words along with the kids with exaggerated hand motions to encourage them.
Thoughts of a life that could be flashed in Aubrey's mind. Decorating Christmas trees together, limbs tangled in sheets, panting to catch their breath, a blonde or redhead child being tucked into bed with a toothless grin. A white picket fence.
"I don't think I've seen Chloe this happy since your senior year at Barden." Ashley said softly, dropping into the plastic chair next to Aubrey with a soft smile. "I'm really glad you two ran into each other."
Aubrey finally wrenched her gaze away from Chloe and the kids to glance at the brunette next to her. She had always liked Ashley, even if the other woman had never been very outgoing. But she had her to thank for bringing Chloe back into her life, if even only briefly. She smiled at the other woman next to her.
"I've never loved anyone but her." Not even myself.
Ashely grinned and nodded. "We all kind of had a hunch back then…I mean, she did get the best solo in Eternal Flame."
Aubrey choked a broken laugh and dropped her head. "It was that obvious?"
"Of course."
The blonde laughed, hoping to conceal the quiver to her bottom lip. "You two are close yeah?" At the other woman's nod, Aubrey clenched her jaw and pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and also nodded. "Good. Look out for her…make sure she's ok. Just in case I can't for some reason I mean. I just…I'm just glad she has you."
Ashley narrowed her gaze and stared intently at the older woman.
"Ok, great job you guys!" Chloe exclaimed, drawing both Aubrey and Ashley's attention back to the front of the room.
Ashley let her comments drop at the sight of the kids scattering from the stage to flank Chloe with hugs before moving on to her as well. When she glanced up from the hug one of the kids had thrown on her, she caught Aubrey and Chloe staring at each other, soft smiles on their faces. Any previous concerns quickly faded away at the love she saw so plainly reflecting from both of them.
xxxx
Aubrey's eyes fluttered open the following morning and a moan immediately slipped from her lips as Chloe kissed a slow and steady trail down the column of her neck. She gasped when the redhead nipped at her collarbone playfully.
"Good morning." Chloe hummed, lips still pressed to the taller woman's skin.
Aubrey smiled in spite of herself. Chloe's bare skin pressed against her own with the redhead holding her tightly and peppering kisses along her neck and shoulders were enough to force any morose thoughts from her mind momentarily.
"Good morning." She replied, burying one hand in Chloe's tousled curls.
She felt Chloe smile against her skin. "I could get used to waking up like this." The redhead mumbled.
Aubrey smiled again. "This is pretty nice, I have to admit. I'd forgotten how warm you keep my feet. You're like my very own heater!"
Chloe giggled and poked the thin woman in the side before lifting her head to gaze back at the blonde. "Merry Christmas Eve."
"It is Christmas Eve isn't it?" Aubrey asked softly, her smile slipping. "I'm leaving tonight."
"I know." The redhead replied with a pout. "Do you really have to go? We could cuddle all night and drink eggnog and then…keep each other awake while we wait for Santa…"
Aubrey's heart clenched at the devilish smirk on Chloe's lips. The redhead eyed her curiously at her lack of response. Chloe couldn't help but feel like she was missing something, that something just wasn't quite right.
"Where are you going anyway?" she asked.
"Oh um…" the blonde sputtered, realizing she clearly hadn't put enough thought into what she would tell Chloe. She chided herself mentally for getting so caught up in Chloe that she let that detail slip. She was growing careless. But she did have to admit that the plan to kill herself had not been as present on her mind now that the redhead had reappeared in her life. "I just have to get away…"
Chloe quirked a brow and eyed her as if she was trying to determine if she was telling the truth. "Aubrey…are you ok? I mean, I know it's been a rough few years and you should definitely take some time for yourself but…seriously, are you ok?"
And suddenly, Aubrey wanted to tell Chloe everything. About how she had decided not to leave a suicide note because no one would be there to read it. About how if she were honest with herself, she had to admit that she had actually given up on life years ago. About how she was certain that no one would miss her…no one but Chloe that is. But also about how for the past few days she was having second thoughts. But for some reason she couldn't. She had made her plans and Posens stuck to their plans.
"I'm ok." Is all that came out instead.
Chloe narrowed her gaze at the taller woman and sighed. In all her years of knowing Aubrey, she knew it was best to let the blonde open up when she was ready. They had been apart for so long, Chloe could understand it would take time to get back to where they were and she would simply have to be patient and wait for Aubrey to be comfortable enough to open up to her.
She nodded and once again dropped her head to Aubrey's shoulder. "Well…I just want you to know that I'll be right here waiting for you…so I hope you don't keep me waiting too long."