Santana was chewing her bottom lip, flinching when she felt her teeth break the skin. She lifted her hand to the spot, mentally cursing herself as she saw the blood on her fingertips.

"Please say something," she muttered, unwilling to meet Sebastian's eyes. She glared at her hands as folded and unfolded them in her lap.

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know. I just want you to speak to me. I hate fighting with you."

Sebastian frowned. "Could've fooled me."

"I was an idiot, I panicked and I overreacted. Sebastian, I never wanted to hurt you. That's the last thing I ever want to do you. You mean so much to me."

"I love you, I really do." He met her watery gaze. "More than you know, I just don't know if I can keep doing this. Our entire relationship is fighting and making up, lies and secrets. It's exhausting, Santana. It shouldn't be like this."

"Please don't. You don't mean it, Sebastian, please."

He closed his eyes tightly, shaking his head. "If I said everything was forgiven I'd just be doing it for the sake of our baby. I'd end up resenting you and you'd know I didn't mean it. Santana, I really think this is the end. You can't have relationship without trust and it's pretty clear at this point that we don't trust each other."

The tears that had been building up overwhelmed her eyes, falling down her cheeks in thick cascades. "Please."

He reached across the table, pulling her hand into his own. "I love you, I love you so much and I'm going to be there for you and our baby. I just can't be your boyfriend. Not right now. You understand, right?"

Santana could feel herself shaking. It felt like the onset of a panic attack. She couldn't breathe. Her lips ghosted words that she couldn't form. A silent beg as she felt Sebastian slipping away from her. Permanently this time. "One more chance. One last chance, I'm begging, Sebastian. Please. Please don't do this."

He shook his head, eyes closing tightly again. "Santana, don't make this harder."

"If it's so hard don't do it. Can't you see what this is doing to me? How much I love you. I left Brittany so we could be together, I broke her heart. I want to be with you, Sebastian. Just you. There's no one else. You can't do this to me."

His young face looked suddenly old beyond his years and so tired. "This isn't healthy, our entire relationship started based on a lie. It's thrived on deception and arguments. I think we need to take some time, grow up and see if fate brings us back together. I'm prepared to work with you and Blaine, oh and Rachel, to get to the bottom of the whole photo fiasco, after that," he took a deep breath, squeezing her hand tighter with what seemed to be an unconscious desperation, almost as if his body was rejecting his words and trying to fight back. "We go our separate ways. For a while at least. Just to figure out what we want. Who we want. And who we want to be. I'm committed to supporting you and our baby, I just can't be your boyfriend right now."

Santana nodded, feeling the steel walls she'd built up beginning to make a box around her heart. If he was going to do this to her, he was going to have to accept the consequences. "Here are my conditions. You get to visit the baby on my terms, we tell our parents when I'm ready. You don't get to make decisions during this pregnancy, about anything. From now on you're just the guy who knocked me up. For all my parents are going to know you were a drunken one night stand gone wrong."

Santana was taken aback by her own harsh words. Part of her was desperate to throw herself into Sebastian's arms and cause enough of a scene that he would give up and agree to take her back. A bigger part of her wanted to hurt Sebastian the way he had hurt her. As always, Santana allowed the Snixx side to take control whilst she tried to fight off her emotions. She would be stronger than Sebastian. "You will have to visit on their birthday and Christmas. Other holidays are up to you. I get to decide when we tell them the truth."

"This doesn't seem like a fair arrangement, Santana."

She shook her head. "That's because it's not. For either of us."

"Do I get a say in the name?"

Santana narrowed her eyes. "No. If it's a girl, her name is Annie. If it's a boy; Michael. Smooth criminal is always going to be important to me. This baby is part of us and Smooth Criminal will always be our song. You don't get to change that."

She left the Lima Bean without another look in Sebastian's direction.

xXxXxXx

Santana hadn't left her room for almost three days. She'd begged her mom to let her take time off school. She couldn't bear the idea of facing everyone in glee; especially Puck and Artie. It would take all of her non-existent self-control to keep from clawing their faces off.

There was a sharp tap at her door.

"Go away!"

"Santana, you do not speak to me like that and you know it. You're not two years old anymore. Let me in."

Santana did as she was told, not wanting another argument. "Come in, Mom."

Her mom did so, sitting on the edge of the bed as Santana climbed back under the duvet. "What's wrong, mi pequeña niña?"

Santana shook her head. "Nothing's wrong, Mom." Even as she said it she knew her mother didn't believe her. She'd never found it easy to lie to her parents. Even her dad, though not the most observant, usually due to taking on the night shift, could usually see through her lies.

Her mom raised an eyebrow. "Santana. I'm your mother, I know when something's on your mind. I haven't seen you this upset since you came out."

Santana flinched. "I screwed up, Mamá. I'm so sorry."

"What have you done?"

"I'm pregnant. I'm so sorry, Mamá."

"Excuse me? Santana, is this a joke?"

She shook her head. "I thought this guy loved me. I was an idiot."

"Have you told Brittany?"

Santana sighed. "We're not together any more, Mom. We broke up. She's with Artie now. I was dating the guy who knocked me up but he dumped me. He just dumped me as if I was nothing to him."

"Santana, what are you going to do?"

Santana could feel the tears welling in her eyes again. She suddenly felt terrible for the way she had treated Quinn when she'd found out about her and Puck. "I'm keeping it. I'm going to graduate, have this baby and follow my dreams. It's just a hiccup, a lifelong hiccup, but I'm not going to let this ruin what I'd planned. What we'd planned for me."

"Oh, Baby. This is a big decision. Are you sure. I want to support you, but are you sure you're ready to take on such a big responsibility?"

"No."

xXxXxXx

A/N This is so rubbish. I'm so sorry. The next one will be better. Here's a playlist to listen to when reading this story. If you have any other suggestions for it…LET ME KNOW! playlist?list=PLtWXDp86V2u9TO7q1aVuguZp6w36Ec4C_