It wasn't long before they were back at Nick's apartment and they had all of their materials spread out across Nick's table. They divided up the job into two parts, Nick would cut up the lavender and mint while Judy mixed the oils and added them as needed to the pseudo 'nip, until the absurdly fragrant mass was sticky enough to clump together easily. Eventually, their noses soon adjusted to the fact that Nick's apartment now smelled like what a scented candle commercial portrayed. The kind where an unconscionable amount of smoke and oils are concentrated in a small room to the point that the individual living in the room apparently begins to slowly suffocate and suffer from oxygen deprivation as they collapse into a nearby chair. At least, that is the impression that Nick always got from those commercials.
Judy had been attempting to clean the gunk from her hands periodically until, after a dozen trips to the sink and using very hot water, it became apparent that such was an utterly pointless affair. Noting her frustration Nick commented on the situation.
"Sticky huh?" Judy looked up at Nick who had his face down dicing leaves on the other end of the table.
"You knew this would happen didn't you?"
What? The person who seems to know exactly how to imitate the look and smell of street catnip also knows what the worst part of the job is and happened to assign it to someone else? Unthinkable!" The sarcasm in Nick's voice was thick enough that it would have been more accurate to describe it as a solid concentrated mass.
"Come on Nick, this stuff is really sticky."
"Uh huh, sounds like the same complaint that you had last weekend…"
"That was your fault and you know it!" Nick glanced up, forming a half smile.
"Carrots, you can't seriously expect me to be able to control something like that on the spur of the moment."
"What? Of course I can, besides you could have given a little head's up first!"
"I don't think that would have helped carrots."
"What do you mean?"
"There was maple syrup on the walls Judy…"
"Those pancakes were amazing! I couldn't help- "
"On the walls Judy! You could at least try using silverware next time…" Judy looked a little annoyed and also slightly embarrassed at this point having been brought up. She really didn't understand what it was about his pancakes that made them so incredible. It was all she could do to keep herself from eating the plate which they had been served on.
"I just don't get it; you must have put something in them!" Nick just looked down at his work, shaking his head.
"It was only carrots Judy."
Judy sighed and re-focused on the task at hand. Nick glanced up and noticed her looking intently at her work. Discretely, he looked back over at the counter and noted the position of a small wooden pepper grinder. However, Nick knew that instead of pepper it contained a bit of dried up night howler. Honestly, it had been an accident that Nick mixed up his pancakes with Judy's. He had started adding powdered night howler to his food after the fiasco at the museum. He figured that he would see if he could build up a resistance to the plant. Although, he had to admit; the results of seeing night howler added to Judy's pancakes was far more entertaining than he could have imagined.
After they finished mixing all of their herbs and oils, Nick grabbed a pile of canvas square and started putting half a cup of the mix into the center of each one of the squares followed by twisting and then tying them closed. This resulted in small fragrant bags that would give a very pungent scent when squeezed, if they had been full of catnip it also would have given the owner a nice dose of nepatalactone. Judy noted the speed and efficiency with which Nick worked with a small amount of concern. She knew that he had had many jobs in his life, she just hadn't considered that 'drug dealer' might have been one of them. Nick had of course assumed that Judy would be wondering about this point since he came up with their plan in front of Chief Bogo, and he was truly rather surprised that she hadn't said anything about it. He knew how she thought, so he figured that it was better to correct her thinking now than to let it fester in ignorance.
"So carrots, I bet you want to know how I got so good at this huh?" Judy's head and ears shot up in an instant.
"No! I mean yes! I mean maybe!" Judy always hated how Nick knew exactly what she was thinking sometimes. Then again, she really was curious about just how he had picked up on these skills.
"Well, let me start off by saying that I didn't deal in this stuff. Technically, I never knew that I was packaging catnip."
"You mean to say that you had plausible deniability right?"
"Right you are carrots, as usual I always stay on the right side of the law." The grin on Nick's face was now threatening to turn into a full on smile. He continued his reflection on his part time job from years past.
"As far as the law was concerned, I was being employed some spiritualists to make personal air fresheners to help 'balance chi.' Then again, I doubt that many spiritualists you know walk around with personal body guards and wear full three piece suits." Judy snickered a little at this, contemplating the image of their naturalist yak friend in a suit. For some reason, she also pictured all of the fly's surrounding him also wearing suits, the thought forcing a second bout of snickering from her.
"Why did you leave that job?" she said flicking a tear from her eye
"Figured I could make more on my own. Good thing too, their place was raided a week later."
"Oh…"
"Yeah, it was bound to happen eventually." Judy looked a little surprised, but nothing more than a passing second of realization. Nick had worked many jobs before and the fact of the matter was that he had avoided ending up in the ZPD database for all those years because he possessed an eye for when things would go south. It was that intellect and that ability to analyze the situation that made Nick such an awesome cop, though it also made him a bit of an insufferable jerk at times too.
Judy and Nick spent the next few hours finishing up their task and put all of the canvas balls into their large black backpack. As the sun set outside his kitchen window Nick grabbed a glass of water and set himself down on a sofa to get comfortable. As he sat down and turned on the television though his view was blocked by Judy who was now wearing the shorts and tank top that Nick had suggested previously. Nick continued to stare straight ahead, attempting to ignore the obvious obstruction.
"Hopps…" Judy tapped one of her feet whilst trying to stare Nick down, a technique that had yet to bear any fruit.
"Shouldn't we get going?" Nick casually glanced upward at Judy and then back to where the television ought to have been.
"Judy, you understand that it's a night club right?"
"Right, and it's currently night." Judy stood there motioning towards the kitchen window. Nick let the silence hold in the air as he gave himself a long sigh.
"Carrots, have you ever been to a night club?"
"No… But it sounds self-explanatory…" Nick rolled his eyes and motioned for Judy to sit down next to him on the sofa.
"Sit down carrots, we're not leaving until ten. Until then, why don't you pick what we watch, then fall asleep in an hour and drool on my arm."
Judy sat down next to Nick and got comfortable, deciding not to mention the fact that she had only drooled on him once. Although, she decided that tonight might be the second time that it happened.
Several hours and a damp shoulder later, Nick figured that it was about the right time to get going to the night club. Shaking Judy awake he went over to the kitchen and grabbed some coffee which he had set on a timer. He thrusted the coffee towards Judy who seemed to be slowly coming to realization that they were heading out to the club now. Taking a sip of the coffee and rubbing her eyes she tried to figure out what time it was.
"What time is it?"
"1am." Judy looked a little shocked.
"Everyone has probably gone home Nick! Why'd you let me oversleep!?" Nick simply shook his head as he adjusted the backpack.
"Look carrots. First of all, this is a night club, which means that the place probably didn't start to pick up until after ten. Second, this is a night club that is frequented by felines and they love the night. Which means, we're going to be right on time." Judy shook her head and looked up in time to see that Nick was already part of the way out of the door. Grabbing a few things, she rushed out to follow him.
Nick watched carefully as Judy drove the car down the largely empty city streets, trying to pick up how she was driving stick. He had never learned how to drive stick himself, but he figured that if carrots could do it he probably could too. Judy noticed that he was attempting to observe how she was driving and so decided to give him a little show. Letting her country instincts get the better of her she let the pedal drop when they were close to the club and did a burnout from the light followed by a trick downshift as they rounded the last corner. Nick, who had been watching attentively was pushed back into his seat, his ears laid flat against his head.
"I guess that's one way to make an entrance." Judy smiled back at him.
"Don't worry, if we have some time with this car after the case I'll show you how to drive stick." Nick allowed himself a little smile.
Judy's little stunt though had turned a few heads, including the bouncer that they were walking up to. Nick walked up to the bouncer with a slight swagger, an attempt which the bouncer seemed unimpressed with. The bouncer was a massive elk who stood in front of the club wearing a neat polo and a dark pair of sunglasses, as Nick tried to pass him into the club he shifted to stand in front of him.
"Where do you think you're going eh?" The huge elk spoke with a thick northern woods accent; he clearly wasn't from around town. Nick tried to play it cool, pretending not to even notice that he had just been denied entry into the club.
"I'm just meeting up with a few friends inside, they told me that it wouldn't be a party without me." The bouncer looked unimpressed.
"Yeah sure, I tell you what. Why don't you wait out here and I'll tell you when you get in huh?" Judy, who had been standing behind Nick, poked her head out from his side and glanced up at the bouncer. Noticing her the bouncer relaxed a little and lowered his glasses to get a better look at her.
"That your car?"
"Uh… Yes."
"What do you have under that hood eh?" Judy brightened up a bit, although she hadn't spent that much time with the car she had at least read all the important information on her phone while Nick was watching TV, before she began her drooling slumber of course
"Supercharged V8, it puts out over 500 horsepower and has around 550 foot pounds of torque at peak power."
"Nice…" With that the elk slowly nodded and moved the velvet rope aside motioning for Judy to enter the club. Nick looked on, astounded as ever by the fact that Judy was always seemed to be able to go anywhere that she wanted. Apparently as an afterthought Judy looked over her shoulder and nodded towards Nick.
"He's with me by the way." The elk shook his big head a little, the movement of the antlers making it seem like the whole thing was in slow motion.
"Whatever, you just don't cause any trouble eh?" Nick brightened slightly and walked past the bouncer, giving him a little salute as he walked past.
Entering the club their ears were assaulted …by the quietest electronic music that they had ever heard. It was a very dim rhythm that seemed to smear out across the entire sound spectrum, with the highs and lows almost falling out of their respective ranges of hearing. The melody seemed to float and drift in its long easy loop creating a trance like atmosphere that the various large felines seemed hypnotized by.
Approaching a table near the dance floor Nick and Judy noticed a Tiger and a Leopard sitting across from each other, each one following the swirling patterns of light cast by the various spot lights and filters. Sitting near them they decided to see if they could get some information on who they were getting their catnip from. Nick decided to try his luck first with the tiger who hadn't really noticed them yet. Grabbing the seat next to him he tried to strike up a conversation with the big male.
"He there-" The huge tiger turned to him in less than a second, letting one of his claws reach from the tip of Nick's nose to his chin.
"Shh… Don't be so loud…" Nick managed a slight squeak as his ears retreated from their upright position to lie flat against his head.
"Uh… Okay… So me and my friend here –" The tiger turned towards the leopard and then looked towards Judy.
"Hey… These two are friends…" The leopard looked down and to her left towards Judy.
"Really? Wow, that's awfully open minded of you…" At this point Nick had moved from being scared of the massive felines to being slightly impatient.
"Right, so we were wondering if you guys would like some free catnip." They both turned towards Nick as if a laser pointer had landed on his head.
"Free?" Nick suddenly felt a pang of fear returning.
"Yes… All you need to do is tell us who you normally buy your catnip from." The leopard seemed to still be processing the offer.
"You said free right?"
"Right."
"Like… No money right?"
"Yes…"
"Whoa…" Shaking his head, Nick tried to get the conversation back on track.
"Anyway, who do you two normally buy from?" They both looked towards each other and just shrugged a little.
"You guys seem alright… We usually buy from the deer over there, but you can't just go up to them though, you need to get the DJ to introduce you." The tiger motioned in the general direction of the DJ who was working the synthesizer.
"Thanks, anyway here's the catnip we promised."
Both of their eyes went wide as Nick took out two little bags of the fake catnip and handed it to the two of them. Inhaling deeply, Nick looked on nervously, he hoped that these two were addled enough that they wouldn't notice that he had handed them what were basically very sketchy looking air fresheners. The leopard spoke up after taking a long sniff on the bag.
"Mmmmm…. That smells good…" Judy looked up and started to scooch away from the leopard, hoping to get away before she noticed that the bag didn't contain any catnip.
"Well, we better go talk to that DJ now – " Before she could withdraw any further a large paw had reached around her shoulder and had dragged her closer to the big cat.
"Wait just a second their honey, you two gave us some free catnip, and we really want to thank you for it." Judy started to breathe a little faster as she gave a panicked look to Nick.
"That really won't be necessary-" Nick was now being pressed into the side of the tiger next to him as well. The only thought running through both of their minds was that they hoped these two hadn't figured out they had been tricked. Almost in unison, the two big cats bent down towards their respective captives and opened their jaws ever so slightly. Nearing their captives, they stuck out their tongues and began to languidly groom the two of them.
Nick and Judy merely stared at each other, at first in abject terror, and then abject confusion, followed by an increasingly awkward silence as the sound of their hair being groomed and the quiet techno music filled the air. Unable to move they sat quietly as the seconds turned into some of the longest minutes of their respective lives. It wasn't until they had been thoroughly groomed that their captors allowed them to leave. Watching their awkward exit, the two large felines went back to taking long sniffs of their small canvas balls with one hand, and giving them small, slow waves with the other. Judy, fearing that saying anything would attract attention in a nightclub filled with felines, motioned towards the DJ. Nick nodded in confirmation as he furiously attempted to fix his hair which had been whipped into a strange kind of Mohawk by the tiger's grooming.
They neared the DJ who was wearing dark sunglasses and a sweatshirt, his head carefully bobbing up and down in time with the rhythm that his synthesizer was pumping out. Standing near him it became apparent that his headphones were leaking sound that was slightly louder than the speakers that were surrounding him. Judy tried to get the DJ's attention, jumping up and waving in front of him. All she got back from him though was a muttered "no requests," as his face stayed buried in the synth. Nick nudged Judy to one side and took out his wallet at the same time. He took out a few sizable bills and then laid them down on the synth for the DJ to see.
"I told you I…" His bobbing stopped as he picked up the bills and carefully examined them before putting them in his pocket. Apparently, Nick had caught his attention as he removed his headphones, quickly turning down the volume so as not to upset the clientele. In a rather ironic scene, the deer bent over and huddled with the other two, whispering to them in a nightclub so as not to be heard.
"Alright, what do you guys want to hear?" Judy smiled a bit.
"DJ Flop-ze, Hoe Down Hustle!" The DJ nodded, a note of appreciation his face.
"She's not half bad in my opinion, though I am not the biggest fan of the synth country fusion genre." Judy smiled a little at this, apparently this was a topic that she had a bit of an interest in. Nick stood off to the side, surprised that Judy apparently had an interest in club music first of all, and second that she seemed to have totally forgotten the reason that they were at this club in the first place.
"She's from my hometown actually, I was in school with her!"
"Really that's pretty cool eh? Hey, do you think she might do a show in town sometime? I wouldn't mind cutting a couple of collaborative projects." Nick decided to interject at this point, having the sinking feeling that these two were about to go on a long tangent.
"Carrots here will let her friend know, but first we could use your help." Looking up from Judy the deer looked over Nick.
"Oh, and what might that be eh?" Nick lowered his shades slightly and pulled out one of the little canvas balls that he was carrying around with him.
"We heard that you happen to know the guys that sell this stuff. We happen to be in the market as well and just wanted to figure out where we can and cannot sell." The deer's demeanor changed in an instant. One second he had been looking care free and relaxed but now he was all business.
"What are you playing at eh? If you want talk about that kind of thing you are going have to talk to my brother over there." He pointed his antlers towards the back corner of the club, where several large deer were standing around.
"Well, we heard that you would have to introduce us first." The deer seemed to understand what he was getting at now.
"Oh yeah sure, I see what you mean now. Yeah, that's just so we don't have to worry about cops don't you know? But seeing as your friend here seems to know a thing or two about DJ's I think it's safe to assume that you aren't cops." Nick looked slightly confused.
"I don't get it, how does that –"
"Cause they all listen to either music that is thirty years old or that Gazelle crap. Anyway, how about I introduce you to my brother eh? Oh, and I'll be sure to put on DJ Flop-ze next, but probably not that song, doesn't really fit the mood don't you know?"
Nick readjusted his sunglasses and tried not to look towards Judy who was surely giving him her characteristic smug look. He just didn't understand how she always seemed to get on everyone's good side. Then again, he supposed it was for the best. Judy was the one who knew how to schmooze and Nick was the one that knew how to hustle. Then again, maybe it all came down to the fact that she was a bunny and therefore 'cute.'
After the DJ had set the next few tracks on some sort of trance like loop he led them over to the group of deer that were standing around at the other side of the club with a few large duffle bags slung over their shoulders. Each of them were pretty large, and they were all dressed in a manner that very clearly stated that they weren't from the city. The most obvious feature being the copious amounts of plaid. Plaid usually being an indication that the individual in question was either from the north woods, or a web developer trying too hard to look 'authentic.' Other features that were difficult to ignore were the oversized hats and the massive belt buckles that looked like they ought to drag their pants down more than hold them up. The DJ nodded towards his brother to introduce Nick and Judy.
"Hey, these two are hoping to talk business, said they're looking to sell." The brother nodded and then got on one knee to get a good look at the two of them.
"So you two are looking to sell eh? I saw you talking to one of our clients over there, you're going to give us a cut of that eh?" Nick looked at the large deer and swallowed hard, he had seen situations like this before, growing up and he had a bad feeling about where this was going. Trying not to look nervous he decided to explain that he and Judy were hoping to sell to him.
"Well, you see, actually we were hoping to sell to you and uh… Well we kind of gave those two free samples but I'm guessing zero dollars isn't what you had in mind huh?"
"Oh aren't you a clever one eh? Well that's right we just kind of figured that you would be giving us whatever money you happen to have on you. As well as the rest of your product don't you know?"
Nick instinctively grabbed for the backpack, but before he knew it he and the pack were being carried into the air by on the deer that had moved to flank he as he was talking to the apparent boss. Unable to do much the other deer grabbed him and pulled him away from the pack and held him in front of the boss. The boss had stood up at this point and was now moving in close to Nick, close enough that Nick could tell that he chewed tobacco. At this point Nick's only thought was where Judy had gotten off to, he had to make sure that she was okay. The big deer though promptly cut off this train of thought before it could get very far.
"Alright you hoser, here's how this is going to work. You are never going to come back here and you are never going to try and sell any of your nip in this part of town eh. If you do, we might not be so friendly eh?" The boss nodded to the deer that was holding Nick in the air who promptly tossed him away from the group. As Nick sailed through the air he was able to catch a glimpse of Judy who was busily stuffing herself inside of one of the large duffle bags that they were using to transport the catnip. In one fluid motion she had opened the bag, hopped in and sealed it back shut. Really, it wasn't very difficult considering how much bigger the bag was than her.
Hitting the ground Nick looked over at the deer who all now had their arms crossed and were giving him a hard stare. Taking a mental note of the bag that Judy had jumped into he got up and started to walk away. Once again, despite his best laid plans, Carrots just had to go on and add her own. Hopefully, this time the end result wasn't going to be him being flushed down a toilet. Again.