Up in heaven, Raph was sitting on a park bench, watching Leo and Don sleeping. I miss Leo, Raph thought for the billionth time. I'd give anythin' ta be with him again and our son. Anythin'. Raph thought back to the day he'd lost his life and blinked back tears. It's not that I regret givin' my life so Leo could live. I'd do it again in a nanosecond. I just wish I'd lived ta see Ty hatch and hold him. Even once. Me and Leo had plans and in just a few seconds, everythin' was gone. Hot tears streamed down Raphael's face as he thought about the events of that day.

EIGHT YEARS EARLIER

Leo and Raph had been scoping out the sewers at two a.m., searching for a drug ring that were rumoured to be using it as a hideaway, when they spotted one of the gang members. Chasing after him, they found themselves in the subway. "Go back, Leo," Raph told his mate. "Now."
"I'm not leaving, Raph. Let's go. He's just across the tracks."Leo jumped down onto the tracks and was almost across it when he tripped and fell, landing hard on his carapace. "Leo!" Raph yelled, rushing to his mate and helping him to his feet. "Ya okay?"
"I am now. Thanks, Raphie."
"Ya stupid bastard. What if…."

Raph's words were cut off by the sound of an approaching train. Acting instinctively, Raph shoved his mate to the side and said, "Get ta safety, Leo. I'm comin'."
"Hurry, Raphie," Leo said, doing as he was told.
Raph made to follow his mate, but found his foot was caught in the tracks. Trying desperately to get free, he heard the train speed up and could only watch in abject horror as it headed towards him. "I love ya, Leo," Raph said, trying to be brave. "Remember that. I love ya and Ty, and I'll watch over ya."
"Raph!" Leo screamed. "I'm coming."
"No. Don't," Raph said, waving his hands frantically, hoping the train driver saw him.

The train driver didn't see Raph and a second later, the train slammed into him, sending him flying high into the air and landing hard on his carapace several yards away. Leo scooped up his broken and battered mate and set him down gently on the ground. "Raphie, can you hear me?" Leo asked, sobbing. "Raphie." His mate had multiple bruises and cuts and his body was twisted in a way that Leo knew wasn't good. He yanked out his T-phone and said, trying not to break down, "Don, get to the subway by fifth and main. Raph's been hit by a train. Please come now. It's not looking good." Leo took Raph's hand and said, "Raphie, please. Open your eyes. I'm here."
Raph opened his eyes and said weakly, "Leo?"
"I'm here," Leo said, blinking back tears. "Hold on Raphie. Don and Mikey are on their way."
"I'm not gonna make it, Leo," Raph said, grimacing as pain coursed through his body. He coughed, spitting up blood. "Tell our son I love him, will ya? And I want ya ta find another mate when yer ready. Don. He'd be perfect for ya."
"Raph, don't say that. You're going to be fine."
"Ya and I both know that ain't gonna happen, Leo. I love ya and I'll always love ya. Remember me and tell our son 'bout me. Tell him ta be strong, but ta always have compassion and ta follow his heart. Tell him that I'm watchin' over him. Tell Don and Mikey that I love them. Love ya, Leo," Raph said, his eyes growing glassy.
"No, Raph, don't leave me."
Raph's breathing started getting laboured and with his very last breath, he whispered, "Ya were my world, Leo. I love ya so, so much and I'll always be by yer side even if it's just in spirit." His body shuddered as it went into the death throes and his golden eyes slid closed, never to open again.

"RAPH!" Leo screamed, flinging himself over his mate's body. "Raph, come back to me. Raphie, don't leave me. Raphie! This wasn't supposed to happen. How can you be gone? Raph!"

Leo heard approaching footsteps and looked up to see Don and Mikey, who immediately sensed that Raph had passed. They gathered Leo into their arms and hugged him fiercely. Leo sobbed bitterly and said, "I can't believe he's gone. I... It all happened so fast and now…"
"It's going to be okay, Leo," Don said, rubbing his shell. "It's going to be okay."

"I'm so, sorry, bro," Mikey said, wiping tears from his eyes. "I am. I'm going to miss Raphie too."
Leo pulled away and said, "We have to get home and think about burial. I don't want to even think about that, but…"

"It's best it's soon," Don said. "Casey's farm upstate that you and Raph loved, Leo. We'll head there tomorrow morning."
"Raph would like that," Leo said, sniffing. "I can't believe he's gone, Don. I just can't. It feels so surreal. One minute he's shoving me out of the way of the oncoming train and the next he's flying through the air and…"Leo started to weep again and Don threw an arm around him.
"Shh, Leo. It's going to be okay. Let's get you home and I'll make you some tea."
"Fuck tea!" Leo roared. "It's not going to bring Raph back. He's gone and things will NEVER be the same again."
"You're right, Leo. I was just trying to help."
"You want to help, then try and bring him back, Don. Find something that'll bring him back."
"I can't, Leo. There's nothing I can do."
"Then you're no help. Mikey, help me carry Raph."

Leo and Mikey carried Raph home, took him into the infirmary and placed him on a gurney. "He looks so peaceful," Leo said miserably. "Like he's asleep." Leo removed Raph's bandanna and kissed his beak. "How can he be gone? It's not fair. Raph, was so excited about the baby and now he's never going to meet him. Fucking unfair!" Leo said, clenching his fists.
"Raphie died a hero, bro," Mikey said, placing a hand on Leo's shoulder. "He died protecting you. You can tell the baby that and how courageous and selfless his daddy always was. Raphie had a temper, but his heart was pure and he loved us so much. He'd do anything for his loved ones, even giving his life and he did that for you, Leo. You should be proud of him."

"Mikey's right, Leo," Don said. "Raph's a hero and he'd understand we need to grieve. We'll do that, but then he'd want us to celebrate his life and we can do that by living each day to the fullest, like he did, being true to oneself and being there for his son. We can also have a room dedicated to Raph."
"Like a shrine?"
"Yes. With photos and whatever we want to commemorate our courageous brother."
"I like that and I think Raphie would too."
"And Leo, know that Mikey and I are here for you and the baby. Always."
"Thanks, Don. I'm sorry I was pissed at you. This is so overwhelming. Losing Raphie. I can't believe he's gone and I'm never going to hold him or love him again."
"You don't need to apologize, Leo. I'd be the same way if I lost the love of my life."

"Group hug," Mikey said. "I think we all need it." The brothers gathered into a group hug, shedding tears and thinking of their fallen brother.

PRESENT DAY, OCTOBER 16

"Hello, Raphael," Gabriel, one of the Arch Angels said, as he approached the turtle. "How are you today?"
"Fine, I guess. Ya?"
"All good. I see you're watching your mate again."
"Yeah. I miss him and my son I never got ta meet so much." Raph sighed wistfully.
"Well, I want to talk to you about him."
"My son ain't gonna cross over, is he or Leo?" Raph demanded.
"Oh, no."
"Whew," Raph said, sighing in relief. "Then why do ya want ta speak ta me?"
"You love your mate, don't you?"
"Always have and always will."
"Would you go back in any shape or form even if you could just be close to him?"
"Of course. Why do ya ask?" Raph asked, narrowing his eyes.
"Leonardo's laid two eggs. One is quite large and the other's smaller."
"So? I know that. I saw that earlier."
"Well, the large egg is going to be called Leo…"
"Yeah, and they're namin' the smaller one after me. I know," Raph said irritably. "Stop talkin' in riddles, Gabe, and tell me straight up."
Gabriel chuckled, used to Raph's bluntness after eight years, and said, "The bigger egg will be fine and healthy, but the smaller baby won't be. He'll be mentally and physically challenged. Would you be prepared to go back as him, knowing what you know, just so you can be close to Leonardo and your son?"
"YES. As long as I can be near them, I can handle anythin'."
"You'll be born in December and you'll look like your old self, but have the challenges as I said."
"So I'm Don and Leo's son?"
"You're not their son. You're yourself and no relation to them."
"But they'll question my looks. They don't look like me."
"Raphael, I'll sort it out. I have to go. Speak soon."

Raph watched his sleeping mate and thought, I don't understand why I'm suddenly gonna be reincarnated and as a mentally and physically challenged baby, but I ain't gonna question it. All that matters is that I'm gonna be near my Leo and my son. I'll deal with whatever happens. I love ya, guys, and I can't wait ta be with ya.