We all stared unbelieving as we saw Al's body getting fished out from the chasm and onto the floor of the Pit. 'Maybe there is something similar between me and my brother after all,' I thought to myself. While everyone else was crying and Tris had a breakdown, I stared coldly at the body. "He deserved it," was all I said, voice void of any emotion.
Everybody mourned Al, even Tris, in her own way. If anything, she remembered memories we shared together when we were all friends. When we had nothing to be afraid of. I shared those memories. Yet, I felt nothing towards the now dead boy. He had ruined all those memories by attempting to murder Tris.
The fear simulation. I already had enough trouble dealing with my fears one at a time. Now I had to go through all of them in one go, in front of the Dauntless leaders no less. At least I would have one comforting presence: Eric. No matter how much he annoyed me to no end, he was family after all.
Watching other initiates go through their fear simulation, I winced everytime the needle appeared. I still hadn't gotten over that fear. One by one, everybody passed their fear simulation. Then, it was me. I closed my eyes to avoid looking at the needle coming at me. I would have enough of those in my fear simulation. Going through the fear simulation, I realized that losing my family's love was no longer a fear. Eric had always been there for me. Failure was no longer a fear as well. The events I had experienced as an initiate had made sure of that. After all, if I had been first instead of Edward, or later first instead of Tris, I wouldn't even be alive.
"Congrats, sis. You've completed your evaluation," Eric says, clapping his hand on my shoulder. Glancing at a woman holding a case behind him, he said, "I'll give you your shot later. I think you've had enough needles for today." I nodded, grateful that I wouldn't have to face any more needles.
When rankings came out, I heaved a great sigh of relief. I made it. I was officially in Dauntless.