DONE
Voldemort was done. He was just done. Nope, nope, nope.
When he casted the killing curse at the boy in the cave he was beyond gleeful at the thought of him finally dead. Gone.
But no, he is Harry-bloody-Potter. Of course he won't die!
And that was when every vein in Voldemort's head just snapped.
He stormed outside of Hogwarts snapping his wand leaving a shocked and confused crowd and apparated in somewhere in America- unknown to him that is was Hollywood.
"Fuck it, fuck it all, fuck Potter, fuck him" He said glaring at every person he sees, not caring that he was in the muggle area.
The crowd around him were oblivious that the man having a tantrum on the street is none other than the ferocious and evil Dark Lord Voldemort. They just thought he's some kind of weird cosplayer- because its Hollywood, shit goes down there every day.
But no one even dared to approach him for 2 main reasons. One, they have no idea which fandom he is from and two, the man seems to snap and glare every person within 3 feet in his personal bubble so they just left him alone, casting awed glances at him.
"Fuck Britain, fuck the mug-" His mutterings came to a stop when he tripped on a stone, face flat.
When most people would often break their nose after a face-flat fall, Voldemort did not for he was special or just out-of-the-category, after all, how can you break something you don't have?.
Voldemort sighed in resignment. He dusted his robes and glared at the stone who tripped him, when out of nowhere a flyer slapped his face.
"Fucking flyer" He cursed and looked at the flyer.
It was a casting call for this movie called 'Thor'
Not feeling interested he simply skimmed the flyer down to the bottom until his eyes felt on a stop on a certain name called 'Loki'.
"Hmm.. interesting" Voldemort muttered, still completely ignoring the muggles who were now taking photos of him.
He read the character and description and grinned. Hates his father? Check! Likes the colour green? Check! Wants to rule the world? Check!
Voldemort laughed oblivious to startled reaction from the muggles around him. He heard some mutters like 'his make-up is so realistic' and 'what's he supposed to be?" also "he cackles better than wife"
It was 2 weeks later when he finally got the callback from the casting director after his audition for the movie 'Thor'.
"Hello? Is this Tom? The one who auditioned for Loki?" The casting direction said on the other end. Somehow, Tom felt slightly uncomfortable when he first heard the voice, the eerily familiar voice but he just ignored it feeling that if he kept guessing he might turn paranoid.
"Yes, it is I" Tom said in return, making his voice as silky as possible thinking he could charm the man like he did with his death eaters.
His death eaters, Tom wondered where they are now. Locked down in Azkaban? Persecuted? Escaped? Even he doesn't know anymore nor does he care anymore.
"Good job sonny, you just got it! Now listen here, I expect you to be in the area this Thursday, we will have some briefing to do and some rules to make, Understood?."
"Of course sir, Thank you" He said trying hard to mask the glee in his voice.
"Alright then, what was your last name again son?" The director asked.
Tom Riddle pursed his lips and glanced at the mirror in front of him. His black hair was in immaculate condition, waving in utmost elegance that only hair commercials could par with. He then looked at his dark eyes, the same eyes that once help contempt on a certain Potter.
The name Tom, it was common after all, he could use it but he could certainly not use Riddle since a certain brat already knows it. But Tom- what?
Voldemort's eyes narrowed when he remembered the stone the he tripped on. It's not like he has 1 hour to search for a surname, he kind of has around less then 10 seconds and right now all he has in his mind is the word stone and the name Tom. So improvise it is.
'stone…stone…. it sounds good but not enough' Tom thought
Tom Stone? no
Tom Riddleston?
sounds like a band, no
Tom Hiddleston- perfect
"Hiddleston. Tom Hiddleston" He concluded.
The line went silent for a few seconds and only a scribbling of a pen could be heard.
"Tom Hiddleston, am I correct?"
"Correct"
"Got it, now kid, when you get to the area tell the front desk you're looking for Mr. Potter, Harry Potter" And the line ended.
—-
Somewhere in the galaxy far far away
Luke.. I am your-" Darth Vader stopped when a scream of rage strained their ears. Both men cringed and tried to rid the sudden ringing in their ears.
Darth Vader shook his head and remembered that he still has an announcement to drop. He cleared his voice and spoke.
"Luke.. I am you father" He said but to his suprise Luke simply looked at him expectantly. Why did he not react? Was it not enough? What else did he want him to say? That he was also his mother?
"What?" Luke said but to Darth Vader bewilderment he heard nothing but the ringing of his ears.
"What? I can't hear you"
"What? Speak up! I cannot hear you"
"What?"
—
OMAKE:
Somewhere in the galaxy far far away
"Did you hear that?" Luke said, his forehead dripped with sweat from carrying the talking green frog on his back for hours.
"Ah, anguish, pain and suffering it is" Yoda cleared in a dream-like state.
"Should we locate the sound?"
"Why must we?"
"To help them, isn't that what Jedi's do? Help people?"
Yoda gave Luke an incredulous look that spoke 'stupid you are'
"Why am I here again?" Luke sighed
"Carry me you must"
"Beep beep" R2-D2 agreed.