Dedicated in loving memory to Mako
"Fractured Tales of the Rose Bride"
Because I have nothing better to do.
Chapter Seven: Beautiful Beasts
Once upon a time, in a land far away, there lived a prince who was very beautiful but very selfish, and his heart was cruel. One stormy day, he received a visitor, dressed in filthy rags and covered with mud. The prince couldn't bear such a hideous thing to defile his palace, so he banished the creature back into the storm. Though the little hag promised him great riches for but a few single hours of shelter, still the prince refused, shoving it outside in the rain. The storm, however, was very strong, and soon the wind and the water lashed at his uninvited visitor, tearing off the rags and washing away the mud to reveal a beautiful enchantress! Startled, the prince begged for mercy, but the enchantress had seen his heart, and decided to punish him for his misdeeds.
"You have the heart of a beast, and now a body to match it!" As she proclaimed, a great light blinded the prince. When he awoke, he was horrified to discover that his body, once a proud and striking figure, was disfigured and grotesque. In his madness he wailed, and stole away into the dark emptiness of his palace, where he stayed there until this very day…
…When a meteor smashed into the palace and destroyed it! Cool!
……
"Meteors," Juri sighed as she closed the book. "Why is it always meteors?"
"You were expecting Godzilla?" Shiori asked her. The older woman shrugged.
"I don't know. If they're going to kill him off, they could at least make it more dramatic."
"Like what?"
"Like…oh, I don't know. Maybe he could be moments away from finding true love, but at the last second, he sees his beloved perish in the snow, and his heart gives in from the agony. That would be a death befitting a tragic hero."
"That's such a cruel fate!" Shiori hissed. "Why on earth does he need to be killed, anyway? Can't this story have a happy ending like all the others?"
"I think I covered that base pretty well earlier on," Juri replied crisply. "But since we're talking about disguised enchantresses turning men into monsters, we may as well go the whole distance and just throw every incredible idea around. Why not have a happy ending? It's an impossible world, so it needs an impossible ending."
"You don't believe they could find any happiness?" Shiori's eyes grew large and watery, her best use of Puppy-Dog weaponry. Juri snorted.
"Of course they could, but it's just as Tolstoy said: 'There is no happiness in life, only occasional flares of it. You must learn to live on them.' Whatever pleasures they may find will be weak and meager, and they will pick up any shreds and sew them together for as long as it takes."
"I have a different question," Shiori said, covering Juri's hand with their own. Their eyes met, and the shoujo-ai quota was met for the day. "In the story, it says that the prince had the heart of a beast, and later a body to match. Now ideally, the princess would cure him of his ugliness and restore his humanity, thusly inferring he had a good side all along. My question is this: do you think there still exists a portion of that beastly demeanor in him, or was the purge complete?"
"Well, complete should not be used so frivolously," Juri muttered, using her free hand to caress her chin. "You're suggesting that before, he was 'all' beastly, and with the arrival of the princess, he later became 'all' princely, a true prince. Naturally, the use of the word all is, at best, a terrible mistake, and criminal at worst. Surely he had a shred of decency before the transformation. No matter how bad a person is, you can't be 'pure' evil, because there's always going to be some goodness in there."
"Or a goodness that's been spoiled," Shiori added. "But you didn't answer my question. What about after?"
"The same, in reverse: he can't be completely good either, because then there'd be no point in keeping the princess, or the palace, or anything. A man who still needs to eat is not perfect, just as a man who still pauses to consider his actions is not wicked. I'm sure there'd still be some remnant of the beast left over, just a small amount." Shiori smiled; that answer seemed to satisfy her. Fearing this nonsense was driving hardcore Utena fans away, she pounced on Juri and started to unbutton her dualist uniform, one little bead and ribbon at a time.
"What do you suppose made him so beastly to begin with?" she whispered, hot breath mingling. "Was it merely turning one person away? Perhaps the prince had been doing very good deeds up until that moment, and the sorceress caught him at a bad time. Or maybe he had been isolated as well all his life, cast out of the warm light that so many others enjoyed. He would then believe his actions against the magical woman were justified: he was refused, and so he too refused, having known nothing else."
"Truly, there is no border between good and evil," Juri muttered, feeling Shiori's hands wander. They not only crossed the outer terrain; a few nimble touches found their way within. "The sorceress had no real right to say that his heart was completely wicked. Perhaps he did grow up knowing nothing but villainy, as you've suggested. A man who spends all his life looking at red will not understand blue. He'll shun it and hate it. He can't be punished if beastly actions were the only thing he knew."
"But the story clearly indicates that he's a prince, and we have to consider that." Shiori had Juri's shirt unbuttoned by now, and was playing with the straps of her brassiere as if they were strings of a harp. "If the prince had a beastly heart, we may be able to assume that, all his life, he had been spoiled and brought up with a superior outlook on life. Even the most noble man finds it hard to be humble if he's in a position of great power, and princes hold entire regions in their hands. This man's mind was set on the grander objectives of life, and so why should he allow a wandering stranger inside?"
"You're jumping around too much!" Juri laughed. Shiori sat up and removed her clothes, making sure the goddess kept her eyes open. Naked truth prevailed.
"You wanted to look at this scientifically, or that was my impression." Shiori brought Juri up and embraced her, struggling lazily to make the woman shed her fears. "Scientists must look at every angle and ask every question, even if it contradicts an earlier question. We've already discussed several possibilities of why the prince turned the woman away; I'm just posing probable solutions."
"You know what really caught my attention?" Juri asked, running her fingernails up and down the uncovered layer of skin, scratching Shiori's surface. "The prince was a beast in every aspect until the princess came to his side, or the damsel: the woman, let's say in general. And after a few days of her, he changed back and became better. There's a whole world of discussion there."
"Such as?"
"Man cannot find order on his own, for one. Nor can he find peace. Solitude brings disaster, and further distance from your fellow man, or woman, may turn your beast into a stronger monster. We once said he turned the woman away because he too was turned away; this isolation now had a more tangible face to it, and it continued to haunt and torture him, even after the metamorphosis. Perhaps then, one can say that the enchantress never really turned him into a beast, and that it was his mere loneliness that caused all this trouble."
"What do you mean?"
"It's plausible all this was a direct cause of his ostracized feelings. A lonely man becomes embittered and turns vile, even to the point where he casts away potential friends. The enchantress may have merely accelerated this emotion, and magnified it into a grandiose façade. Thusly, the man's own inner demons caused his primal nature, and the arrival of the woman, of companionship, helped quell this maelstrom and bring sense into his world."
"But it has a very politically incorrect overtone to it, from a man's point of view," Shiori added. She finally removed Juri's shirt and pinned her to the ground, clawing and biting at will. "It basically states that man cannot find real 'redemption' from his beast without the help of woman. Man is practically powerless in that sense. Without woman, he continues to be the beast, but with her, he can become the prince again. Woman is the light in the darkness; she is the order in a world of terrors. I sense Oedipal overtones."
"That's your response to everything." Shiori laughed.
"A boy's best friend is his mother. But why does it never tell the story of a woman turning into a beast, and a man rescuing her from her own inner demons?"
"The same political incorrectness you infer, perhaps?" Shiori shrugged.
"Perhaps. Woman is always perceived as a comforter; man is either the provider or the one in need of comforting. And woman apparently has no power unless she has someone or something to comfort. Her true strength is never revealed until her arms fold over some pathetic life."
"So by that rationale, perhaps woman is the beast until she finds a beast to cure."
"I don't follow."
"Woman's world is chaotic without the pathetic life, if what you believe is true. In a sense, whatever she puts her arms around will become her rock, a steadfast place in a storm. The wind blows at her without mercy until she finds something to hang onto, but once she does, things become peaceful again. So the woman needs man just as much: she battles his inner demons, and he fights her outer struggles."
"Juri," Shiori smiled, leaning close to her face, "it's not like you to be so optimistic. And you said there was no such thing as a happy ending."
"But you also said I was looking at this scientifically. This is all just a theory of mine." Shiori grinned sweetly, and finally closed the gap between them.
"Of course it is."
Meanwhile…
"I don't get it," Touga muttered, indignant. "I simply don't understand. Why in the world are those two just laying there talking about nothing?"
"Maybe they finally ran out of steamy innuendo and moved into the 'boring couple' phase," Miki suggested.
"Or they could be stalling for something," Nanami suggested, "but whatever it is, you'd think it would've happened by now. Those two are just wasting a lot of time!"
"I hate to suggest it," Saionji muttered, "but perhaps they really are having an intellectual discussion. Their minds work on a level even we can't understand. They have known and treasured each other all their lives, and recovering from their falling-out has taken a significant toll on them. If this is a means to recovery, then perhaps we should just turn our heads aside and give them our blessings."
"You know," Juri said, raising her head up slightly, "we can hear you all. Oh, and hiding behind a nearby bush? Very stupid."
Saionji and Nanami both let out an impressive growl.
"IT WAS THEIR IDEA!!" they screamed, indicating each other. Touga and Miki sighed in defeat.
"But we went along with it. Now who's the fool?"
And so…
With their discussion concluded and their physical activities over, Juri and Shiori got dressed once more, stood to their typical proud height, and presented each other with a civil, fair smile. They definitely made progress today, and who knows what new grounds would be tread the next time they met?
"We certainly have come a long way," Juri stated. "It's been a pleasure talking with you again. I'm glad we can do some things with a semblance of peace."
"I agree," her better half countered, eyes glowing brilliantly. "I do hate mincing around like this, as if there were still glass on the floor of our relationship. I don't doubt there's still some cleaning, but at least part of the refuse has been swept away. And your intellect has grown."
"Well, I do know my way around a library," Juri managed humbly, her blush indistinguishable from the rest of her face. They came to a stop, turned, and examined the road they were leaving behind, hallmarked by their most recent handiwork. The four interlopers had been dealt with in a manner best befitting spies and eavesdroppers, though Shiori thought the method a bit too extreme.
"Do you think they'll be okay?" Juri turned around, her voice laced with the laughter of one strong enough to control great outbursts.
"I'm sure they'll manage. Being tied up and hung upside down from a flagpole isn't the worst obstacle they've faced. We'll see them soon enough."
"I hope so," Shiori exclaimed, her voice honest and proud. "Life seems so much more interesting with your friends around."
But in the meantime…
"I SAID I WAS SORRY! WON'T YOU CUT ME DOWN?! I THINK I'M GETTING NUMB!!"
"Be quiet, Nanami," Touga spat, though he was in no better a position. "We're all stuck up here. I don't suppose any of you remembered your penknives, did you?"
"Who do you think I am, Batman?" Miki challenged. "I don't carry everything around with me!"
"All right, I'm sorry. There's no need to snap."
"Touga?" The redhead faced Saionji.
"Yes, what is it?" The younger man was growing nervous.
"Just how long do you think they'll let us hang here?"
"…Umm…"
"Any time is too long!" Nanami proclaimed. "If those two had any maturity in them at all—"
"Just be patient, Nanami," her brother snapped. "I'm sure they'll come back for us any moment now, once they've realized we learned our lesson."
Two weeks later…
"YOU said they'd be back any moment! YOU said they'd hurry right along once they realized we learned our lesson! Boy, were you wrong! Big Brother…I thought I'd never say this again, but you are a fool!!!"
"For the forty-two-thousandth, sixth-hundredth, seventy-fifth time, Nanami, shut up!"
"What do you mean, Tenchi Masaki could beat Tuxedo Kamen? You're out of your mind!"
"Just think about it, Miki!" Saionji snapped. "He has the sword of Tenchi, the Light Hawk Wings, and his whole freaking harem with him! What does cape boy have except a flower and a bad monologue?"
"If you're including Tenchi's harem, you may as well include the Senshi, and last I checked, they outnumber Tenchi's meager assortment of concubines!"
"HA! That's where you're mistaken! You forget to take Washu's genius into account, not to mention Ayeka's ties with the royal family, Sasami's overwhelming adorability, Kiyone's experience as a Galaxy Police Officer, Mihoshi's dumb luck, and Ryoko… Oh, don't even get me started on Ryoko."
"Three words, Saionji: Death Reborn Revolution. Instant victory every time."
"Big Brother?" Nanami whimpered. "Do me a favor, will you? Kill me so I don't have to listen to their pointless dribble anymore."
"Trust me, Nanami," he swore. "If I could do that, I'd take myself with you."
The End
Stay tuned for my next installment.
It's got pie!
(Note to readers—Juri and Shiori lived happily ever after!)
"Hey! Weren't you listening to me?!"
"Juri, shut up."
"…Yes dear."