Chapter Three
Mimi sat alone in the Ten-Minute Break room, flipping through GQ magazine, and sighing as she stared at all the gorgeous men. All her other friends were in fanfics at the moment(yes, Angel and Collins FINALLY got a fanfic!)and she was extremely bored, and in need of male companionship.
As if on cue, the door came flying open, and Mark came running in, looking as if he had just received a slap across the face. His eyes were wide, his jaw dropped, and he looked utterly horrified.
"Hey Mark...what's up?"Mimi asked casually. "Shouldn't you be in that Mark/Roger fic?"Mark opened and closed his mouth several times before answering.
"...I got killed off!"he finally cried out. "I got killed off!"
"Aw, that sucks,"Mimi shrugged. Mark was shocked.
"No, you don't understand, Mimi...I got killed off! ME! I'm Mark! I never get killed off! I'M 'THE ONE OF US TO SURVIVE', GOD DAMMIT!"Mimi ran to Mark's side, patting his shoulder and hushing him.
"Shh...Mark, relax. It's okay. We all get killed off sooner or later!"she assured him calmly.
"Not me! Everyone loves me! HOW COULD I GET KILLED OFF!"Mark shrieked frantically.
"How did you die?"Mimi wondered.
"Roger gave me AIDS, and I died! He's supposed to die! Not me!"Mark slumped into a chair, holding his head in his hands and breathing deeply. "Oh God...I think I'm having an attack!"Mimi sat down beside him, rubbing his back and helping him breath.
"It's okay Marky...baby..."Mimi said, letting her hands run lower, as an idea struck her. "Roger is just a great big jerk anyways! You need someone nicer...someone prettier...someone like, say...me! Mark/Mimi's are pretty hot, you know..."
Then Angel and Collins walked in, back from their one-shot, and Mimi immediately jumped away from Mark, who wasn't paying attention to her anyways.
"Well that was short-lived,"Collins sighed.
"Just be glad we got something, hun,"Angel replied. Then they spotted Mark, who was still brething heavily.
"What's going on?"Collins asked.
"He got killed off,"Mimi replied.
"Me! I got killed off, Collins!"Mark began again, leaping up. "How could they DO that to me?"
"Relax Mark, we've all been killed off at some point,"Collins assured him.
"Some more than others..."Angel added bitterly.
"But I'm MARK!"Mark cried. He sighed, sitting down again. "I need a smoke..."
"Sorry buddy. After that last fic, I'm gonna need ALL the pot I can get!"Collins said.
"Why? What was so bad about it?"Mimi asked.
"We got a puppy. A FUCKING PUPPY, MIMI!"Collins hollered. Angel patted his shoulder.
"Deep breaths, Collins. It was only a one-shot,"she reminded him.
"Yeah, but now it's gonna inspire little girls to write MORE puppy stories!"Collins groaned, also sitting down. Angel placed herself on his lap, leaning back and playing with his hat.
"Just keep reminding yourself of that last time no one wrote any fanfics..."she said. Collins grinned, recalling their one venture into the M section.
"Heh heh...now THAT offered some good inspiration to older writers!"he giggled. Then the door opened and Maureen and Joanne came walking out. Maureen looked annoyed.
"Well that story sucked!"she announced. "I didn't even get any tongue!"
"Honeybear, it was rated K,"Joanne reminded her.
"Still! You'd think middle schoolers could go a little further than hugging!"Maureen whined. Then they spotted the hyperventilating Mark. Maureen frowned.
"What happened to-"
"Don't get him started..."Collins warned.
Then the annoying, droning voice came over the speakers:
"TEN-MINUTE BREAK FOR THE FOLLOWING FANFICS: WICKED, CATS, SWEENEY TODD, JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR, THE PRODUCERSAND RENT."
Collins frowned.
"The Producers?"he repeated. "Since when are they in this room?"
"Since Sound of Music was kicked out last week. Didn't you get the memo?"Mimi asked.
Roger suddenly came dashing through the door frantically. He looked around, then spotted Mark, and went bolting across the room.
"Mark!"he cried. Mark looked up...and scowled.
"You bastard! You gave me AIDS!"he shouted.
"Ooh! Drama in the RENT corner everybody!"Jesus called. Before they knew it, every other musical in the room was gathered around Mark and Roger.
"Five dollars to come see Mark and Roger fight!"Benny called, jumping up onto a chair.
"Benny! We are NOT selling tickets to this!"Angel scolded.
"Not for five dollars! Are you kidding? This is worth at least ten,"Collins snorted. Angel glowered at him. "Er, I mean...no fight! Nothing going on! Move along everybody!"The crowd dispersed, grumbling as they returned to their corners.
"Mark, I'm really sorry,"Roger insisted. "Everything was horrible after you were killed off anyways! The author got tons of flames, and the story's been dropped!"Mark looked at Roger...and grinned.
"Well, in that case...I forgive you!"And he and Roger shared a hug, causing all the other musicals to let out sighs of 'Aw!'
"No one ever flames when I get killed off..."Mimi grumbled.
"Amen to that,"Angel sighed.
"Hey Joanne! You were in a story the other day!"Collins announced suddenly.
"No way! Pookie, you didn't tell me that!"Maureen squealed. Joanne grinned proudly.
"And you know what the best part is? It got reviewed!"she proclaimed. Everyone cheered.
"Yay, congratulations Joanne!"Angel cheered.
"Yeah, congratulations,"Benny snapped mockingly.
"What's your problem?"Maureen demanded.
"He's just pissed because the most reviews he ever got was from the time he was baked into a pie in the Sweeney Todd fic,"Mark snorted.
"Hey. Less talking, more tongue."
"Sorry Roger..."
"Aw Benny, I'm sorry no one likes you,"Angel said sympathetically. Benny sighed.
"Maybe I should just move into Sweeney Todd for good,"he grumbled.
"Sounds good to me,"Collins shrugged. Angel slapped him.
"No Benny! If you go, who will Mimi screw around with behind Roger's back?"she reasoned.
"Mark,"Benny offered.
"Mark? Why?"Maureen asked.
"Because everybody screws around with Mark,"Benny pointed out. The others all nodded.
"He's got a point there,"Collins stated.
"Mark, you whore!"Maureen called.
"Okay Benny, go join Sweeney Todd. We don't need you,"Angel decided.
"Cool. It was nice working with you guys!"And Benny walked off.
"So...now we're down a character,"Joanne stated.
"I guess this means April will become more popular,"Mimi said.
"April..."Angel growled angrily. Collins hushed her. The others frowned.
"What's her problem?"Maureen asked.
"She has this thing against April, because she's been in more stories and she's dead when the play starts,"Collins explained.
"I'M ALIVE FOR 3/4 OF THE FRIGGING PLAY! SHE'S NOT EVEN IN THE PLAY! IT'S NOT FAIR!"Angel screamed furiously.
"Jeez, is today National Flip-Out Day or something?"Maureen grumbled, as Collins slammed his hand over Angel's mouth.
"Damn, Jesus is looking fine..."Mimi commented, completely ignoring everyone else.
"Mimi!"Joanne cried.
"Hey, it's like, okay to say that now!"Mimi defended. "You know, 'cause of the DaVinci Code and all that shit."
"Just because people have said it doesn't make it okay,"Joanne pointed out.
"Good enough for me,"Mimi shrugged. "It's not like any of those Producer guys are anything great."
"True,"Collins agreed.
"Now that blonde chick on the other hand..."Maureen said, gazing over at the Producers corner.
"Forget it, honey. It's not like we'll ever have a crossover,"Angel remarked.
Suddenly Sweeney Todd and Mrs. Lovett came storming over, tossing Benny down before them.
"Keep your annoying landlords in your OWN stories!"Sweeney snapped.
"Aw, you don't want him either?"Angel asked.
"No!"Sweeney and Mrs. Lovett yelled. And they stormed off.
"Well, we can rule them out for possible crossovers,"Collins stated.
"They're snobby anyways. They think just because they've been revived they're better than the rest of us!"Maureen huffed.
"I hear they're all insane anyways,"Mimi said.
Suddenly the room was filled with the annoying voice again:
"ATTENTION ALL FANFIC CHARACTERS! TEN-MINUTE BREAK IS UP! PLEASE LISTEN CAREFULLY TO THE FOLLOWING LISTING OF STORIES AND CHARACTERS NEEDED..."Collins and Angel immediately crossed their fingers.
"Please don't let there be any RENT stories!"they pleaded.
"RENT..."
"Dammit!"
"PRODUCERS CROSSOVER..."
"SCORE!"Maureen cried, leaping up, and running to the door excitedly.
"CHARACTERS NEEDED: ROGER, ANGEL, COLLINS, JOANNE, MAUREEN..."
"HECK YES!"And Maureen went bolting out the door.
"MAUREEN!"Joanne cried, running after her quickly.
Roger grudgingly pulled himself off of Mark.
"We are SO not finished yet,"he insisted, as he stormed off.
"Collins...we're in a story that's not a one-shot!"Angel cried.
"And there are no puppies!"Collins added excitedly. The two skipped out the door giggling hysterically, as the Producers characters followed them, looking concerned.
"Get used to it,"Mimi warned them as they cautiously walked through the door behind the RENT crew. Mimi and Mark sat there, alone in the Ten-Minute Break room.
"Well, here we are again,"Mark remarked. "We're hardly ever together, huh?"
"Yeah, tell me about it,"Mimi agreed. Suddenly she realized that Roger wasn't around. She smiled, placing her hand on Mark's leg. "Hey Marky...have I ever told you I think you're pretty cute?"She edged her seat closer to Mark...
"ATTENTION! THERE IS A CORRECTION! IT WAS MARK, NOT MAUREEN WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE RENT FIC! THANK YOU."
Mark leapt up.
"I'm coming Roger!"he called happily as he skipped off out the door.
"God dammit!"Mimi grumbled, crossing her arms. Maureen came storming through the door.
"I was so close to getting down that girl's shirt, too!"she whined. She scowled. "Fuck Mark..."
"I tried,"Mimi sighed. Maureen let out a deep breath, sitting next to her. The two eyed each other for a moment.
"You up for making out?"Maureen asked.
"Heck yes,"Mimi replied. And the two went at it.
Benny suddenly popped up behind them, frowning.
"Hello? I'm still here too!...nobody ever wants ME!"
A/N: If you don't know the Sweeney Todd revival that joke about them being insane wouldn't make sense, but I wanted to put it in just in case we have any Sweeney fans! Okay, so my brain is fried. This week we started rehearsals for our summer musical at the theater I go to. We're doing Chicago and it's BRUTAL dancing, so I have just been an exhausted mess these last few days. I apologize for any typos or errors. But anyways, I can't say if this is the last chapter or not. Whenever I think I'm done, more ideas pop into my head. Send me your thoughts/comments/complaints.
Pools-of-sorrow, all the Benny stuff is dedicated to our musical! Hahaha