A/N: OMG. The last 'S'. You all ready?? -crowd cheers-
-The last chapter of Infiltrating Neji Hyuuga.-
Thank you all for the overwhelming support I got for a fic I didn't expect to get more than 10 reviews. It feels so good to finish a project.
But I've just opened a new humor story called "The Marriage Counselor" to fill the void. I think if you liked this fiction you'll like that one too, so go check it out!
NOTE: I strongly advise that all readers re-read, or at least skim over chapter 2. A few references will be made, and I don't want anyone to be confused!
Thank you Anise for helping me out with this story! LYLAS!!! --Jaz
-Enjoy-
-JayleeJ
Disclaimer: Naruto. Plus me. Equals…nothingness! –cries in Sasuke's Emo corner-
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This was it. No more tries left. Her only shot were these clothes, this makeup Ino gave her and all the courage in the world.
Tenten could do this! After today it'll all be over and she can finally rest her mind.
So far these three 'S's had been nothing more than humiliation and ridiculous effort. Being caught going though Neji's binder. Being caught going though Neji's closet. It was sort of embarrassing now that she looked back on it. She sighed. Tenten was tired of the failed scheming, tired of the overwhelming curiosity and just plain…tired.
But there would be no giving up now, not after all of the determined attempts she's made. No matter what, that Valentine would be hers.
Either way…this epic will end very soon, with the final 'S' – Seduce.
Tenten applied the 'Ravishing Red (num. 04)' lipstick and slipped on the outfit the busty blonde custom brought for her. Oh joy.
She took one look at herself and cringed.
This was 'gonna be a long morning.
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Tenten sighed in frustration. Her mid---no, upper-thigh mini-skirt was riding up again.
How Ino did this everyday was a wonder in it's self.
Final 'S' - Seduce
Time: - 7:00 am.
Location: - Village Shopping Centre – East Konoha district.
Time remaining: - Until Neji goes back home…which could be anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours from now.
It was surprising so many people were out this early. She knew from experience Neji was a morning person and often came here looking around for new weapons, hair products, etc…He shouldn't be too hard to find.
Whatever. Tenten just wanted to complete this mission before anyone she knew saw her looking like…this. Her stomach grumbled annoyingly from lack of breakfast.
Outer Tenten: You'd know what would be perfect right now…
Inner Tenten: A neon-colored piano being played by a lotion bottle?
Outer Tenten: …Uh, no. A salad…a certain kind of salad…
Inner Tenten: Oh no. Hell no. We are NOT eating that…concoction.
Outer Tenten: It's an acquired taste, I'll admit but----Holy crap.
Inner Tenten: Hmm? What is it n----Oh snap.
Tenten stopped in front the busiest stand in the whole centre.
'Hiashi's Salad Supreme!'
-Now Open for Business!-
"Next!"
A girl with blonde hair stepped up.
"Uh, yeah, can I get the fruit/yogurt/egg and cheese salad combo please?" The bored-looking cashier yawned widely and rung up the meal.
"You want salt with that?" She thought it over in her head. Salt? On Salad? Well if she was going to have yogurt and everything else in it, you might as well go all the way…
"…Sure, why not?!"
"That'll be four dollars and fifty-nine cents ma'am."
The blonde pulled out the necessary cash and put the meal in her lunchbox. The next customer ordered while Tenten gawked at the stand, wondering how in the blood hell her Salad ™ surfaced to the public. Inner Tenten laughed lightly.
Inner Tenten: You fool. This is entirely your fault. You left that bowl of repulsive slime on the table last night where anyone could have found it. Unfortunately for you, someone took advantage of the opportunity. Ah well…that's life kid. Why don't we go home and create something of equal nauseating level, like a chocolate-hot sauce-pop tart-sandwich perhaps?
Outer Tenten: Screw you! Don't I have owners' rights to my salad?! A Hyuuga is going to court tonight!
Inner Tenten: Oh and how will that case go? How will you prove the salad is really of you invention?
"Hiashi, I know you stole that salad I made last night when I broke an entry to your house!"
…Uh no sweetie.
Outer Tenten: …But…but…
Inner Tenten: I know. It hurts. But you have to let go. Your salad is in better hands now; people all across Konoha can enjoy it…even though it's disgusting…
Onter Tenten: Thanks…I guess. I bet your right. More people can be exposed to something new and different. …Let's just finish this mission.
She took one last look at the stand trying to feel an ounce of happiness, but couldn't bring herself to it. Tenten just wanted credit where credit was due. All of a sudden, she didn't feel hungry anymore. Aww. Tissue anyone?
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A large commotion was forming at the head of the Centre. Wooden seats were filled with spectators in front of a large stage, but many who couldn't find a place to sit, stood in the aisle or off in the back. What exactly was going on? She headed toward the rear, hoping Neji would be somewhere close, since half of the shoppers seemed to be in this area right now. Off to the side, she heard two men talking with pink hair and clipboards.
"Dude, we totally gotta get this show rolling. We're 15 minutes behind! What's the final line up?"
"Ok. The talent show opens up with the comedian boy, and then the Hyuuga. After that, it's the kid with his dog and then, like, a few other acts …wait…dude, look over there!" The other male turn around wildly.
"What?"
"Dude."
"What!"
"…Dude!"
"…What?! Spit it out! What're you so stoked about?"
"Did you just like, see that Hyuuga walk past? He had a flamingo on his back! The plan I and your sister Rikka did worked!"
"No way dude!"
"Yeah way! I just like, totally saw it with my own two eyes man!"
"SHWEET!!"
"Yeah I know. Totally gnarly Haruno clan pwnage."
---
Oh geez.
Ignoring the retarded prank played, did they just say, Hyuuga? As unlikely as it seemed, Neji could be in the talent show…
She took her seat, ready to see if the Hyuuga would really be in this thing…The lights around the stage dimmed.
"Hi dudes and dudettes! Welcome to the 44th annual Valentines Talent Show! I'm your host of unparallel awesomeness, Mikey! You ready to see the first act?"
The crowd cheered for a few seconds and he picked up the micro phone again.
"Alllllright! Give it up for our first act, Gaara of the Sand! The SAND UP comedian!!!"
-crickets-
….
-more crickets-
-ahem- "Err…well enjoy the show!" The crowd clapped hesitantly.
Garra walked on the stage with an emotionless mask on his face. He glared at the crowd and snatched the microphone from the stand.
"Err. Hi. …Um. What do massage therapists eat for dinner?"
Silence.
"Well they eat Spaghetti. You know like, SPA-ghetti."
More Silence. Gaara's sand surrounded him menacingly.
"Start laughing or I'll kill you all."
"…"
Slowly nervous chuckles emitted from the crowd. He looked pleased and was about to start another joke until the host interrupted him.
"Uhh…I think that's all the time you have Gaara." said Mikey. He nodded and exited stage left.
"Right…! Give it up one more time for Gaara!!!" The crowd forced an over-exaggerated cheer.
"Okay! Next is a new and upcoming lyricist, 'Madame Hyuuga'!" The crowd cheered again, but this time their lives weren't at stake. A shy-looking girl took the stage.
So it was Hinata in the show, not Neji. That sucks. Who knows where Neji could be by now… Not wanting to waste anymore time, Tenten started to leave.
Until Hinata, well, 'Madame Hyuuga' took the mic.
"U-um, h-hi everyone, thanks, for u-um, coming and e-enjoy!" She put her hat on backward and the beat started.
…Ay…
…Yo…
…Sup…
…Check it.
My name is 'Madame Hyuuga,'
And I stay mega sweet.
Imma' Hyuuga Heiress,
So gravel at my feet.
Let me tell 'bout myself,
Before we begin.
I may not look confident,
But imma beast within.
If you're lookin' for a warrior,
Put your search to rest.
If you need someone reliable,
Simply I'm the best.
I'm fresher than a biscuit...
Tenten laughed at Hinata's forwardness and resisted to stay for her entire act. Obedient to the mission however, she got up and resumed her search for Neji.
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Tenten's feet ended up carrying her to a large sandbox with a playground. She climbed on top of the monkey bars, trying to think. Perhaps she should ask some of the kids if they've seen Neji around…
There was a girl with black hair and red highlights playing on the slide. She might know…
"Um, excuse me, but have you seen a rich kid with black hair nearby?" The girl took a sip of her soda and another swing of pop rocks.
"Huh? Yeah I have!!!"
"Where?"
"I tricked you! No I haven't!!!"
"Oh…well thanks anyways I guess…"
"But wait! I HAVE!!!"
"OKAY…then where?"
"Follow meeeeee!!!"
The girl skipped to the other side of the playground with Tenten trailing behind her.
Note-2-self: NEVER eat soda and Pop-rocks at the same time…
They ended up in front of Sasuke, creating an elaborate sandcastle.
"You meant him right? Right? Right?!!!"
"Uh…sure. Thanks for your help." Maybe she should have been a little more specific…
"Yay!!!" She did a little dance that would have been innocent…
Until she stepped on a part of Sasuke's castle. The look on his face made Tenten smirk.
Inner Tenten: HAHA Emo!! That's what you get for snitching on us in Chapter 1!!!
He looked at the girl, Sharingan fully activated.
"You've just stepped on the west wing of my Elizabethan-aged sand-model. Explain yourself female." His crimson eyes scared her so bad she started to cry.
"I-im sorry, it w-was an a-a-accident!"
Tenten could feel his chakra building up.
"If I were you, I'd run…" she said. The girl did. Once she was long gone, Tenten frowned.
"Sasuke you sick sadist, why'd you have to terrify that poor girl with your Sharingan?...Anyways, have you seen Neji?"
Sasuke didn't answer her. Suddenly the sand started to stir and she heard chirping birds. Thousands of them. She looked down and saw a blue light reflecting upon Sasuke's face.
"Calm down! It was just a silly sand----" The chirping sound grew louder.
Inner Tenten: I think we should leave…
Outer Tenten: Yeah, I think so too.
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After narrowly escaping Sasuke's Emo-sand wrath, Tenten ended up in a park. She sat down on the nearest bench, trying to think of a new strategy.
Inner Tenten: …Well this is fun.
Outer Tenten: I'm thinking okay!
Inner Tenten: Whatever. Tell me when you stop sucking at life.
Outer Tenten: Will do…
Hey! Wait a minute!
Inner Tenten: Idiot.
Sigh. What to do, what to do. If she were a long-haired-prodigy-in-need-to-give-someone-a-Valentine, where would she go?
Who knows what the enigma that is Neji's mind might do? She dangled her heels over the bench edge trying to come up with a solution. A bee from some nearby flowers buzzed around her head.
Outer Tenten: Stupid bee…
Inner Tenten: It's annoying me. Kill it unmercifully.
As soon as it landed on the sidewalk near her feet, she stomped on it. It took one last breath and died. It was rather…sad.
But not really, cause no one cares about bees.
Except one person…
"Maggie!" yelled Shino, running down the parks' path. He stopped in front of Tenten and knelt down on the ground next to his lost friend.
"Maggie! Liveeeee!!!!" Tears leaked from under his shades. "What will Ebert do without you?" He continued to sob on the floor near the bee.
"I-i didn't m-mean to Shino... I just thought it was a regular, annoying bee. Not one of your battle bugs."
He looked up from the ground to our bun-haired friend, killing intent radiating off his chakra.
"You killed her because you thought she was just 'some annoying bee'?"
"Yeah, pretty much…so no hard feelings right?" She cracked a warm smile.
"No hard feelings? What if I think you just some annoying human? Should I kill you?" Tenten gulped. This nutcase was being totally serious.
"N-no."
"But I think I should. What do you think Ebert?"
-buzz buzz-
"Oh yes, death by stinging is exactly what I had in mind."
Inner Tenten: Run girl! You have no weapons!
Outer Tenten: Ha. Once again, you underestimate me. What's a weapon mistress without weapons? We fight!
Inner Tenten: You have weapons on you? Where?
Outer Tenten: …I'd rather not say…
She pulled out needles and kunai from…well use your imagination. Tenten got into a fighting stance.
-insert Final Fantasy battle music here-
-…or Matrix Reloaded music, which ever you prefer-
"Bring your worst bug boy." said Tenten over-dramatically.
"Come with your best weapon wielder."
Bugs by the 10's started to secrete from his skin.
Then by the 100's.
And the 1000's.
"Oh fu---!"
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Tenten woke up at the foot of a tree, swollen bee stings scattered all over her arms and legs. She groaned.
Where am I?
Slowly details form her fight trickled back in. Right. Shino and his crazy bugs did quite a number on her. How long had she been out?
"Neji…where are you…"
Unwilling tears leaked from under her eyelids. With sand in her hair and atrocious-looking sting marks all over her body, even if she found Neji, there'd be no way he'd be seduced into anything any time soon. A deep voice interrupted her thoughts.
"Tenten."
She looked up and saw the very boy she was crying about with a light frown painting his face.
"Are you crying? What's wrong? …And why the hell are you dressed like that?" She hiccupped as more tears slid out.
"So…Neji…who's it for?" Tenten decided on the spot to initiate another 'S'.
'S' – Straight up ask him.
"What do you mean?"
"Don't play stupid! I saw you make a Valentine in class yesterday! Who's it for?" Neji's frown deepened.
"What in the world are you talking about? You know, these last 2 days you've been acting very, err, weird. I never made a Valentine yesterday…" Tenten started to get angry. Why was he playing with her emotions like this?
"But I saw it! It had hearts and everything!" Neji sighed and pulled an envelope from his knapsack.
"You mean this?" She peered on its surface.
Happy 40th Birthday Mom!
I (heart) You!
Love, Neji.
(heart) (heart) (star) (smiley face)
"That card was for your mother?"
"Well yeah. Who'd you think it was for?"
"Uhh..no one!"
As the details started to sink in, her dim-witted mind set began present it's self. God she's been stupid. So very, very stupid. The whole mission was such a freakin' waste of time, Neji didn't even have a---
"Umm…Tenten?"
"Hmm?"
He pulled a heart-shaped box of chocolates from behind his back, a light blush tainting his skin.
"Happy Valentines Day."
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This. Was. Ridiculous.
How could he! Sakura gave him the best six months of her life and this is how he repays her. Sasuke goes and buys jewelry for other girls!
That sniveling Emo bastard.
She knew she should have listened to her mom and went out with Kiba instead…but nooo, she had to be Miss, 'But mother! We're in love!"
How foolish she was.
If he was gonna cheat on her, there was only one thing left to do…
Assassinate Sasuke Uchiha.
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Mission: Infiltrate Neji Hyuuga
The Three 'S' Method.
Sneak.
Sleep.
Seduce.
The fail-proof way to get what a female wanted.
Mission Complete.
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A/N: All finished! I really hope you've enjoyed this story, and thank you soo much for reading. It means the world to me.
I've set myself up for a sequel, I'm still wishy-washy on whether I'll do it or not, It depends on how anticipated it is, and how much time I have.
OMG I love you people so much!
Just had to get that out again.
ANYWAYS. Check out my new humor story called 'The Marriage Counselor' If you have the time. I think you'll like it! –wink-
Bye-Bye for now!
-JayleeJ
BTW: This chapter is dedicated to two people who should be mad at me, Shins Lighter (for not updating when I said I would. Arrghh!) and lyr.black (because her OC was barely mentioned) (I really did try to include her cause I liked her character, I was gonna have her mess up Kiba's act in the talent show, but I just couldn't get her dialogue to sound natural.)