I guess it's been awhile since I've updated this. Here it is!
Disclaimer: It's a lifelong dream of mine, but at the moment...no. I don't own.
the perfect man
chapter 2 - unavoidable
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I sat on the third-to-the-bottom step in my house, the only light on in the house coming from the kitchen, the only sound was the murmurs and whispers of Renee and Phil.
It was late; after midnight. I folded and unfolded my copy of The List in my hands, absently thinking if The Perfect Man was even possible. No one could be perfect, could they?
"Well, it is very important to me. But I love you and I would stay here for you..." I blanched at Phil's overly romantic words, knowing he was talking about his minor-league baseball career. He belonged to a team in Florida, the only reason he even met Renee was because he was on a mini-vacation. He had to go back to Florida eventually.
I knew that he probably really wouldn't leave his precious to be with my mother, despite the pretty ring that sat on her finger now. Nope. She would move with him.
And the only thing that was worse than the dry, hot, humid climate of Arizona just happened to be Florida. I had been thinking more and more of Charlie, about the possiblity of moving in with him. Of course, I'd have to talk to Renee and Charlie and move to a different school.
But either way, I was going to move to another school. So the prospect of leaving Natalie behind wasn't that hard to think about. I had only one more year of high school anyways, and we'd probably be going to different colleges.
And what would be that bad about living with Charlie? No, I didn't know very well. I visited him every year (or tried to), and he wasn't a complete stranger. And that could be changed, easily. He was, after all, my own father. I probably shouldn't let a divorce that happened years ago keep me from knowing my own dad.
I leaned back a little, trying to listen to my mother's response. "Yes, I know, dear. But I can't just let you forget your dream just because of me. And Florida would be nice. It's just...what about Bella? It's the middle of the school year; she can't just leave." She sounded distressed and confused, very miserable. I definitely had to make a decision.
Stay with Renee and Phil, watch them be all lovey-dovey and disgusting, or be lonely with Charlie. Move to hot, sunny Florida, or dreary, rainy Washington. Bright and dull.
I was sure that I could find happiness in either place. But I had made my decision. Taking a deep breath, and stood from my perch on the step and walked into the dim light of the kitchen.
--
Renee was much more surprised about my idea (or my decision, rather) than Phil was, which didn't faze me much. Phil was probably happy that I had decided not to hold Renee back from him and wonderful Florida. At first she acted as if she didn't like the idea, like she didn't want me to go at all and that Charlie was an evil, vile person.
And with a little coaxing from both me and Phil, she slowly started to get used to the idea. She still didn't like the idea that her "one and only baby" was moving away from her so soon and so sudden.
I could've have told her that this marriage thing was "so soon and so sudden" also, but I just bit my tongue.
My mother then continued to tell me that if (IF) I live with Charlie, I would move before Renee and Phil, after the wedding. I didn't really care when I did move, just as long as it didn't affect my schoolwork in a big way. I still wanted to go to college, after all.
I just nodded and smiling, knowing that with the "absolute ridiculous" suggestion I had just made, arguing and fighting just really wouldn't help me at all.
And I as I bid them both tonight and listened to mother claim that she had to "sleep on it, and to think it through", I pulled The List out of my pocket, holding it gingerly in my hands. It felt strangely weighted, like it had some sort of special powers. I snorted at my own ridiculous thoughts and blamed it on the lack of sleep.
But, now that I had everything figured out, I could sleep now. Everything would be fine.
--
"So...you're leavingme?" Natalie hadn't freaked out, per se, just panicked a little. She was sitting on my porch swing right beside me, kicking the porch below her a little with her toe to make us rock back and forth.
I sighed for the fifth time, because it had been the fifth time she had said something like that, and the fifth time I would have to explain.
"Natalie, you know that no matter where I move that I'd still be leaving you. And I promise that I'll visit you. It's just that...I don't know, I wouldn't feel right living with Renee and Phil after they just got married." I stared out into the sun, vaguely wondering if you could really scramble an egg on the sidewalk because of the heat.
"I know. But we're going to be seniors next year! Think of all the parties and fun you're going to miss out on! I mean, that was going to be our year. We were going to rule the school...," Natalie continued to grumble unhappily under her breath.
And yes, I had heard that speech about a million times this year. Senior year was sacred and important, a time for "parties and fun", a time where we could relax until exams and say our last goodbyes before college. We would do "awesome" shopping for college together, before getting plastered and making tearful farewells while we were hungover...and then leaving for college forever and ever.
Natalie was a little dramatic.
And to to put it the most simplest forms I could, she was also a realist. She knew that it was quite possible we never saw each other after college, that we might lose touch, that our senior year might be the last time we could be together before our 10 Year Reunion, where everyone would have either given up their dreams to start families or given up their families to follow their dreams.
Either way, we both knew it would all end up in unhappiness and misery.
But in way, she was also a dreamer, always saying how things didn't have to be so tragic, that we didn't have to lose touch because it was easier not to contact each other while we were apart. I didn't know which part of Natalie was more frustrating; the realistic, cynical Natalie, or the dreamy, fantasy-loving Natalie. She was never in-between.
And the dreamy, fantasy-loving Natalie was showing right now, trying to force me to believe that me moving was the most horrible thing in the world, that she would absolutely die without me here with her, holding her hand and guiding her way through the world. And those were her exact words.
See? I told you she was dramatic.
I rolled my eyes, watching absently as two little kids rode by on their bicycles, laughing and talking the entire way. "I doubt senior year will be much different than this year, or last year. We might be older and wiser, but high school will always suck."
Natalie groaned, as if I were the impossible one. "That's not my point, and you know it, Bella. I know high school will never satisfy you," She rolled her eyes and I gave her an incredulous look, not exactly getting what she meant by that, "It's just that I was hoping I could spend my senior year with my best friend. It won't be as fun without you." She smiled at me hopefully, and I felt a little guilty, then.
"I'm sorry," I muttered quietly. "But it's inevitable, if you think about it. I would either be moving to Florida, or Washington. I don't really want to leave, and you know that."
Natalie gave a slight sigh of relief. "Yes, okay. I know."
There was a moment of silence between us, me watching the random groups of people that passed my house as the day drug on painfully, and Natalie watched her feet scape the porch as we swung.
"I'll miss you." She admitted quietly.
I smiled at her a little, even though she still wasn't looking at me.
"I'll miss you, too."
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Not sure if I liked it or not. Review, and tell me what you think.