Chapter 5:

Memories

She was surrounded by boxes. Boxes and boxes, filled with odds and ends of memory, with pictures and clothes and other things that she had completely forgotten about.

There were actually only five or six boxes, containing everything that she still owned from her life before. Each was rather large, the top flaps folded over one another to keep them closed. At least one of them at sustained water damage at some point, the cardboard wrinkled and smashed in. Genma had told her that it had been because of broken piping; the lower floors of his apartment complex had been flooded, and her stuff had ended up getting wet.

Well, she reasoned, if she had been able to live without it for eight years, it was probably all right if it got wet.

Raidou had been as good as his word, and had helped her to get an apartment, on the third floor, above and a bit to the left his own. The building was in a good spot; it was close enough to the Anbu headquarters to get there quickly if she needed to, while the hospital was only a few blocks away. It was a bit more of a walk to the building that housed Tsunade's office, but Shizune was fine with that.

And so she'd ended up with a nice little apartment that smelled faintly of smoke and cats. The metallic smell of blood clung to the walls and floor—there were dark stains, half scrubbed away from the wood floor, and unless there had been some murder or some accident, she guessed that the previous occupant of the apartment had been a ninja who had been particularly adverse to getting to the hospital.

Like other certain men I know, she had thought, and she had almost laughed, even though it wasn't that funny. A certain long-haired Anbu member bleeding all over her carpet was certainly not an amusing thought, or a wanted memory.

Raidou and Genma had helped her retrieve all the boxes, then gone off to attend to their respective duties. After three days of rest and a couple more healing sessions, they were both back to work, running around the village and the country.

She supposed that she should be glad she was stuck in an office for most of the day, rather than being sent on one mission after another. Oh, she was sure she'd end up on one soon enough; there was still an absolutely horrible shortage of capable ninja for the number of missions, and Shizune had seen the lists of missions. She completely understood why Tsunade had taken to pinning mission request sheets to the wall and throwing kunai at them; not that understanding stopped her from telling the Hokage that she really-didn't-have-time-to-do-that-because-these-papers-really-need-to-be-signed-and-Tsunade-sama-put-that-sake-down-right-now!

Shizune had found enough time between sorting papers and monitoring Tsunade to find furnishings for her new home. Near everything that she bought was second hand, used in some way or another, and the only thing she spent a particularly long time picking out was the mattress for her bed, because she was not going to sleep on some lumpy sack of hay or whatever else might be trying to pass as a mattress. And with hospital duties—because there was a horrible lack of medics and a general all around lack of quality among the medics they did have, though she was probably more biased from having been taught by Tsunade and having worked with several very talented medical ninjas over the years—she could not afford to get a horrible night's sleep.

But the boxes—the boxes!--had to be unpacked, sorted through, stashed away, or the contents placed somewhere.

There were clothes in the first, neatly folded clothes, half bearing either the remains of blood stains, mended tears, or both. Her old flak jacket was in there, and she pulled it out, holding it up before her.

Well, it would probably fit her better than the one she had borrowed for that last mission.

Unsnapping the clasps, Shizune discovered an old scroll, the edges yellowing and tattered, that contained the names of medicinal herbs—along with those of several rather deadly ones—and several seal sequences. There was also an unopened package of throwing needles, and this she set to the side, to make sure that she knew where it was.

There were also—and she was a little surprised to find these, because she hadn't remember that she still had them at all—the clothes that she had worn some time in her early teenage years, probably shortly after her Chuunin exam. No—no, they were the clothes she had worn at her Chuunin exam, if she remembered correctly.

She placed them back in the box.

There was a whole box of scrolls and weapons, and Shizune frowned to herself as she saw how haphazardly they had ended up. If she didn't know any better, she would have thought that someone had gone through the boxes. But perhaps she had just been hurried when she had packed everything up.

She found the package of tiny kunai that her Uncle Dan had given her, and several small senbon. And there was her forehead protector, the metal slightly tarnished, the material that held it worn and threadbare. There were scrolls and books and loose papers with random marks scrawled across them.

And there were pictures, too, stashed neatly in the bottom of one of the boxes. Books of pictures, and several smaller boxes that looked to be stuffed with them. Shizune picked up one of the albums, opening it and smiling at the first picture she saw.

It was...it was them, years earlier. Genma, Aoba, their sensei, herself. The first picture of them as a team, and they all looked so small, and Sensei looked so thoroughly annoyed with them. He'd always looked annoyed, always acted like he didn't want to be teaching them. Well, almost always, and after awhile she had assumed that it was half an act.

Genma was the tallest of the three kids then, with longer, lankier limbs and hair that was in a perpetual tangle. Aoba was to the side of him, looking just like the merchant's son that he was. And she was there, her hair long and wild around her face, with this uncertain smile on her lips. Sensei had his hand on her shoulder—his good hand, his good arm. The other—he was half turned in the picture, so that his left side was closer to the camera, but she could still see the bandages on his right arm, the ones that weren't there for any purpose other than because--

Damn it, if she could just go back--

She turned the page quickly, turned one, than two pages, and then just stopped. There, in the middle of the page, was a small picture, taken at an angle, as though the user of the camera didn't quite know what to do. It was a little blurry, but the two figures in the picture were clear.

Herself...and Hayate.

Her heart jumped in her chest, and she shut the entire album as fast as she could, placing it back in the bottom of the box. She couldn't deal with that now. She wouldn't deal with that now.

Memories. Stupid, painful, lingering memories. Sometimes she wished that she didn't have them at all.

Of course, whenever that particular thought struck, it was quickly followed by the one that told her that lacking memories would mean not remembering all of the wonderful, happy times, and all the little moments and bits of laughter.

There were plates and bowls, wrapped carefully in old newspaper, and a set of silverware that had belonged to her mother. More senbon, jammed in odd places, a wad of unused exploding tags and a bundle of trip wires. And then, underneath everything--

"Oh."

Her voice came out softly, quietly, and her fingers trembled ever so slightly as she lifted the item out of the box. This...this was...oh.

It was a chain, plain, nondescript dog tags dangling from the end. There were few markings on them, and what was there was only...well, it looked like a long number, etched into one side, and on the other tag a simple design was etched in.

Oh.

It was old, but it hadn't rusted. Old, and it wasn't hers. Old, and there was still blood caked into the metal links of the chain, blood that she'd never bothered to wash away.

Blood slicked hands pressed something in to her own and she looked down, her stomach jumping so violently that she felt as though she were about to vomit.

"I'm sorry." Genma's voice was barely audible, and he coughed violently, blood bubbling at his lips. "I-I couldn't do—Shizune, I—"

She stumbled back, clutching at the dog tags—at their sensei's dog tags—unable to do anything at all.

They hadn't even brought his body back.

She stared at the metal object for a moment longer, breathing as normally as she could. And then a knock at the door made her jump, and she flipped the long chain over her head, tucking the dog tags under her clothing, not daring to leave them in plain sight.

"Coming," she called out as the knocking sounded again, and she stumbled over boxes and clothes and china as she made her way to the door. And she opened that door to find Namida standing there.

"Hello!" Namida said brightly—rather too brightly, in Shizune's opinion, but she wasn't about to put that opinion into words. "I got off from a mission early, so I though I'd stop by."

Shizune stared at her for a moment, blinked. "Um...would you like to come in? I--it's a bit of a mess, but..." Her voice trailed off as Namida swept past her into the apartment.

"Wow." Namida glanced around the room, and Shizune could see her eyes flicker from object to object. "It really is a mess, even though you've got practically nothing here. And it smells like smoke. Do you smoke now?"

Shizune let out a small breath that was half a laugh and half a sound of irritation. "No, I don't. And the mess—I wasn't expecting any company--"

"Oh, don't worry about it. It's not that messy. I mean, compared to what Raidou's place looks like sometimes, this is absolutely spotless." She slide onto the couch that was placed carelessly near the wall. "This smells like smoke, too. Are you sure--"

"Yes." This time her voice sounded annoyed, even to her own ears. Namida looked at her through her glasses with a slightly offended expression.

"Am I annoying you?" she asked, as though the very idea was outrageous. Shizune took several deep breaths and felt the dog tags move against her skin.

"I—no. No, I'm just not...I just...I'm tired and I'm not thinking clearly." It wasn't exactly a lie; she was tired from the work at the hospital, and she wasn't thinking clearly, though part of that was because she was entirely too conscious of the blood streaked metal that was quickly warming against the skin of her chest. And Namida was being being so exuberant in her words that...well, Shizune didn't feel like bantering, and she didn't really feel like putting up with sarcasm.

On the other hand, she didn't like being rude to people, especially old friends, and even more so to old friends who had gone out of their way to visit her.

"What brings you over here, by the way?" she asked, aiming to keep her voice light, too keep any of that lingering irritation out of it. As she said this, Shizune settled down beside the boxes again, lifting out more of the paper-wrapped china and setting it carefully to the side. "I didn't think your complex was around here."

Namida shrugged, leaning forward to watch Shizune's actions. "It isn't. I actually came around to see how Raidou was doing, since he was supposed to still be off duty, but it turns out that he's fine and he's been sent out on another mission." She sighed, resting her head in her hands, hunched forward in her seat.

Shizune glanced over at her, pausing as she unwrapped a plate that would need washing before she could use it. "Do the two of you still work together?" she asked, mildly curious.

Namida shrugged again, her shoulders rising and falling abruptly. "Sometimes. Well...not really. You know how our team more or less split of way back when. I worked with him for awhile, when we were both in Anbu, but now I'm pretty much out of that all together, and he still manages to get himself sucked back in each time he gains so much as an inch. Mark my words, they'll have him back on one of their highly classified missions as soon as he's completely recovered—yes, I know that he isn't completely recovered, Shizune. Don't give me that look."

Shizune dropped her eyes, resuming her methodical stacking of the plates. They were her mother's—had been her mother's, and one of the few things she had left, seeing as most everything had been destroyed when the Kyuubi attacked—and she didn't want to break or chip them. It wasn't as though they were the most expensive plates and bowls, just simple white with a simple flower motif scrawled around the edges.

"But, I guess you know how that is." Namida rolled back onto the couch, stretching her feet out before her, relaxing back into the cushions. "Last time I checked, that had a horrible shortage of medical ninja. You'll probably get caught up in all that mess again."

Shizune let out a short laugh. "With what time? I can understand them wanting me back, but there's a shortage of medic-nin everywhere around here. Do they even teach basic medical care in the academy anymore?"

There was a nervous laugh from Namida, who raked a hand through her wavy hair. "That...no. Not really. They've got a short class, and they cover bandage wrapping and disinfection and a couple other things—bone setting maybe, or something like that—but I don't think it's anything big. All the biggest advocates of medical jutsu kind of disappeared with you and Tsunade."

"Ah."

"Well, Rin taught for a bit," Namida continued, and Shizune looked up sharply, remembering what she'd heard earlier about the woman. "For about half a year. I only know because I had started looking into teaching. I was never all that close with her, and you know that I've never really understood all that medical jargon and everything, so I didn't have all that much to talk to her about. Never mind that she was five or six years my junior."

"Hm." She glanced down, running her thumb over the rim of one of the plates, a thin layer of dust coming off. "So the class is gone. I should speak to Tsunade-sama about reimplementing it."

"And who would teach it? You?"

"Perhaps." Shizune lifted the plates from the floor and walked into the kitchen.

"You'll burn yourself out," Namida called, loud enough for Shizune to hear her. She smiled to herself as she stacked the plates in the cupboard. Yes, teaching a class would be hard, and probably unwise of her, but she found it odd that the class wasn't there anymore. She would have thought, with the country more or less out of war—at least, not in a war as it had been when she was younger—there would have been more time to devote to things like training medics.

"Do they at least have some concepts covered in the regular classes?" she asked, returning to the front room. There were old, crumpled sheets of newspaper spread around the floor now, and she stooped, picking them up and setting them back into the box.

"I told you, Shizune. They get a very, very basic class, and it doesn't cover all that much. We—oh, we do teach them some other things that could be applied to medical techniques. There's a whole unit on the chakra system, if I'm not mistaken, but there's nothing like...like converting regular chakra to medical chakra, and I know that's one of the things you medics have to do." Namida then swiveled her upper body, looking out the window. "Wonderful. It looks like it's going to rain."

"Hmm?" Shizune glanced over, seeing the sky dark with clouds. "Ah, I suppose so. But it's getting closer to winter, so we'll probably start getting a lot more rainstorms."

"And that will make working conditions just so perfect that I'll be wanting to work every single day!" Namida her voice was heavy with sarcasm. Then she turned to Shizune, her back to the window. "Have you had dinner yet?"

"Eh..." It took her a moment to realize that she hadn't. "No."

"Do you actually have anything to eat here?" Namida asked, and then gave an exasperated sigh when Shizune shook her head. "You're just as hopeless as ever--"

"I haven't had time to buy anything!"

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Well, no matter. Come on, let's go out before it starts raining. There are some all right restaurants around here." She jumped up from her seat, grabbing Shizune by the arm. "You've got to eat, you know."

"But I—I still have things to--"

"They can wait. Besides, what'll happen if you forget to eat?"

Shizune sighed, allowing Namida to drag her along. It was familiar, and even though it was annoying, there was a sense of normalcy to it. Namida had always used to drag her around when they were off duty, to one place or another, and Shizune normally never protested too much. Namida was the sort of person who, once they had their mind made up, wouldn't back down easily.

Besides...dinner did sound rather good.

She did manage to loose her arm from Namida's grip after a few moments, and the two descended the steps of the building together. It did really look like it would rain, if not tonight then most definitely by the morning. It's didn't bother her too much; Shizune rather liked the rain, although she knew that it made for horrible conditions if one was, say, running through the trees, because the moss on the limbs would become terribly slippery...

"So," Namida said after several moments of silence. "How are things going? I mean, in general. Other than the running around and doing stuff for Tsunade."

"Everything is all right," Shizune said with little hesitation as they walked out into the street.

"Mhm. I heard about there being some trouble with Aoba--"

Shizune groaned inwardly. "Ah, yes."

"In the hospital?" Namida had this mischievous little grin on her face. "I heard it all from Raidou, but did he really get all upset with you for being gone?"

She sighed, her shoulders dropping slightly. "Yes, I suppose he did. But...Namida, may I ask you a question?"

"Sure." Namida caught a piece of her long hair that had strayed into her face, tucking it behind her hair. Then she glanced over at Shizune. "What?"

Shizune looked down at her feet for a moment, and only a moment, and then she looked up at Namida. "If...if Raidou...if Raidou disappeared for years without telling you where he went, and never had any contact with you, what would you feel like when he came back?"

Namida stared at her for a moment, then rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on, Shizune. Just ask if I think Aoba's actions were justifiable." Shizune just continued to watch her. "All right, fine. I'll answer your question. I'd be angry. Of course I'd be angry. He's my oldest friend, after all. But...I guess that now, after so many years, I'd just have to get over whatever anger I felt, because that would probably mess everything up between the two of us. Besides, I've nearly lost him so many times that...well, I'd prefer to lose him to something that's completely out of my control than to be the cause." She frowned thoughtfully. "You know, when I actually think about it, it seems like he should be more upset with you than Aoba is."

Shizune's eyebrows rose and she shook her head. "No, no. You don't know Aoba. He always...reacts more violently than others."

"Well, I never did get to know him that well. He had that whole spoiled rich kid thing going on when we were younger, so I never really bothered with him." She smiled like it was something amusing, even though they both knew full well that Namida had been from a wealthy family as well, and that in terms of class, her family had been about the same as Aoba's. It was Shizune who had come from the low class, Genma from the long line of shinobi, and Raidou from who knew where. A lovely little mismatched group. "Really, though--"

"I expected them all to be mad," Shizune said quickly, cutting her off. "I just thought Aoba would have used a bit more common sense as to when he was going to yell and everything."

"He'll get over it," and she sounded so confident that Shizune believed her. "Anyway, this is the place I was thinking of. Come on."

It was a little restaurant, with tables and chairs crowded inside. The room was about half filled, and the two women slipped into one of the booths closer to the windows and the door. The lighting was yellow, the sort that made the eyes hurt ever so slightly and made the outlines of objects harder to see, and there were the lingering traces of cigarette smoke in the air. Most of the people sitting at the tables and the booths looked to be civilians, though Shizune could see one or two unfamiliar people who wore forehead protectors, their flak jackets either still on or throw across the back of a chair.

"I hope this isn't expensive," Shizune said as they sat down, and Namida shook her head.

"No, no. I mean, it's good food and all, but it's nothing too great. It's close to my apartment, though."

"Don't want to walk home in the rain?" Shizune asked, a smile growing on her face. "Hydrophobic? I'm sure there's some therapy or something of that sort I could come up with--"

"Oh, be quiet." Namida's voice was somewhat amused, but there was a very raw edge to it that made Shizune wonder. "That's why I don't like medics. Always trying to come up with cures and explanations for everything. I just don't like the rain." She reached to the center of the table, picking up one of the menus. "Besides, I left notes for Raidou and Genma, telling them where we were."

Shizune frowned, picking up her own menu. "Was that your whole intent when you came to my apartment, then?"

"Of course." The smile on Namida's face was very genuine now, the raw, darker edge of emotion having left entirely. "We all try to do this whenever we can; get out and go do something normal, if you understand what I mean. Something away from all the fighting and missions. Of course," she added with a scowl that managed to look more lighthearted than anything else, "that doesn't stop Genma and Raidou from discussion battle tactics and weapons maintenance and whatever else they decide to talk about. It can get really annoying sometimes." She shrugged, turned her menu over, eyes skimming over the contents. "Although, it's not like we're going to wait around all night for them to show up. I've got not idea what sort of missions they're on, and it's possible they won't even be back today."

"Most of the missions that are coming in are menial ones," Shizune said, setting her menu down before her. "There have been a few that are...well, there have been several that require more skilled ninja, but most are simple tasks that can be taken care of in less than a day."

"Yeah? Oh, I forgot. You get to see all of that, since you're working with the Godaime, right?" Shizune nodded, and then Namida gave a soft laugh. "Though, I should probably know all about what sort of missions have been give out, shouldn't I?"

"If you're perceptive at all." She smiled, though, and there was no spiteful barb attached to her words.

They ordered, eventually, and then sat and ate, words interspersed between mouthfuls of food. It was a bit later, during tea and chatter, that Namida turned to the window, looked out, and gave a soft sigh.

"It's raining," she said, and Shizune turned to look as well, a hot cup of tea clasp lightly in her hands.

"It is." She sipped at her tea, her mouth tugged upwards just a little at the edges. It wasn't simply raining, it was pouring, the water already creating puddles on the street, cascading down rooftops and into gutters, turning dust into mud. Despite the horrible working conditions it would create that Namida had mentioned earlier, this was the sort of rain that Shizune loved. The heavy rain, the rain that soaked through clothes within a few moments. The rain that would drench everything and leave things fresh and clean in the morning. "It hasn't rained like this in awhile."

"Wish it would stop raining," Namida muttered into her cup of tea. Her eyes rose from the liquid, darted to the window, darted to the door, to Shizune's face, back to the window. There was a tightness around her eyes that hadn't been there before. "Do you know what sort of mission they were sent on?" she asked suddenly, still looking out the window into the rain soaked street.

"Ah...no. I spent most of my time at the hospital today." Shizune breathed lightly upon her tea, the steam curling up around her face. "I didn't get a chance to look at the mission logs. Why?"

Namida shrugged. "I just wanted to know if he'd get back today." Her hands swirled the tea in her cup, but it almost seemed as though she didn't realize she was doing it. "Wish the rain—ah, never mind."

"Mm." The tea burned her mouth a little, and she swallowed too quickly. Coughing just a bit, Shizune turned to watch the rain as well, seeing as Namida had become much less talkative.

Maybe, if the rain had quit by the morning, she'd go out to one training grounds, maybe work on bringing her speed up to par. Work on regaining the stamina she had once had. She still remembered her little slip in the trees, several days back, and she was rather embarrassed about it. Really, there had been no real reason why she should have slipped—she'd jumped around through trees for most of her life, it seemed, and she just hated that she had lost her balance, if only for a moment. Yes, she'd go train.

Unless, of course, Tsunade roped her into doing the reports and filling out the paperwork again.

Across from her, Namida's tea was growing cold in her hands.

She must have not been paying attention, or perhaps they had simply come from a different direction, but a few minutes later the door to the little restaurant opened, and Namida straightened in her seat, a smile spreading rapidly over her face. She raised her hand, waved it around in the air a bit before her, her eyes focused on something behind Shizune.

She turned, looked over her shoulder, just as Namida spoke.

"Raidou! Genma! Over here!"

They were drenched, having just come in from the rain, and a few stray drops of water hit Shizune's skin as Genma slipped into the booth beside her. Water collected at the tips of his hair, falling onto soaked garments. He offered her a quick smile, one hand removing the bandanna that confined his hair, then tousled that hair, as though that would make it dry faster.

"Sorry it took us so long to get here," he said, peeling off his flak jacket and draping it over the back of his seat, the shirt underneath only slightly drier than the rest of him.

"Oh, doesn't matter." Namida was smiling now, the tension near gone from her face and her body. "We've already eaten, by the way, but of course you're both welcome to order something."

"Are you paying?" Raidou was just as soaked as Genma, dripping water everywhere.

Namida laughed. "Of course not! Why would I pay for you?"

"Because you're nice like that?"

There were paper napkins on the table, and Genma reached for a stack of them, drying off his face and hands. "It's pretty awful out there," he said conversationally to Shizune, his voice slightly impeded until he removed the senbon from his mouth, setting it beside the pile of napkins on the tabletop.

"Ah, yes." It was an awkward response, and Shizune took a moment before she said anything else, flicking a few drops of water off her face. "How did you mission go?"

"It went well," he said, leaning back in his seat, looking rather relaxed—albeit still very wet. "Nothing too hard, since we're still recovering from that last mission. Just message delivery."

"Message delivery?"

"Special message delivery." He smirked a bit at that, picking up the senbon and twirling it idly between his fingers. When his arm rose, the cuff of his shirt pulled back, just enough for her to see the white of bandages twisted around his forearm. Shizune's arm shot out, her fingers closing around his wrist, halting the motion of his hand and the needle.

"What did you do, Genma?" she asked, almost exasperatedly.

"Eh..."

Sighing, she pushed the damp sleeve up around his elbow, exposing the bandages. With deft fingers, she undid the knot that held them closed, unwinding the white cloth. "I hope this is the only injury you picked up?"

He nodded as she peeled away the layers of cloth, the bottommost coming away streaked with blood. There was a three-inch gash in his arm, shallow and not too jagged. Sighing once more, she collected chakra in the palm of her hand.

"I'm not going to ask you what happened," she said, her hand hovering above his skin, the soft glow of her chakra surrounding the injury. "Just...just be careful next time, all right? I trust I shouldn't really have to tell you that at all, but really! I don't want to have to patch you up all the time!" His skin closed, leaving a faded white scar, and Shizune reached down and plucked the bandages from where they lay, depositing them next to the pile of damp napkins.

"You know, I really don't try to get hurt." He ran his fingers over the healed skin. "And thanks, Shizune."

"Of course." The task done, she returned to her tea. It had grown a bit colder, not that she minded. A waitress, a slightly disgusted look on her face as she spied the bloodied bandages, came up to them, took down orders, and soon returned with hot tea and food for the two men. The rain continued to fall outside. Across the table from her, Namida laughed.

There was the rustling of paper and cloth as Genma pushed the unwanted objects away from him. "I hear that the Godaime--" he hesitated a bit with the word, used to so many years of Sandaime, or Sarutobi, that Godaime seemed foreign on his tongue, "--took a new apprentice."

"Ah, yes." Shizune jerked her attention away from the window and the rain and back to him. "Yes, she did. A girl named Haruno Sakura."

"She was in one of the first classes I taught," Namida interjected, cutting into their conversation. "She's a very bright girl—was the best of friends with Inoichi's daughter, Ino."

"They were up against each other in the primaries of the Chuunin exam. Hayate told me--" Genma's words broke off abruptly and he cast a glance towards Shizune, as though expecting some sort of reaction at the mention of his name.

There was none, other than Shizune's eye briefly dropping to her cup of tea. There was a moment of silence, in which the rain seemed so much louder.

"What?" she finally said, a smile that was just a little too big, a little too forced, on her face. "Go on, Genma. What did Hayate tell you?" There was a strained quality to her voice, a brittle tone, as though her words would break into many, many pieces, but she seemed too happy, and if one weren't listening, if one were simply looking in, her face and her posture and everything about her would have been just a little off, but she still would have seemed perfectly fine.

Genma's eyes caught hers for a moment, searching, and then they jumped away before he continued to speak. "Eh, he told me all about the fights. I only got to watch a couple of those genin later on, but this year seemed to have a lot of people with all the odd bloodline traits and inherited techniques. But, you know, that girl—Haruno, was it?--supposedly she broke out of that Yamanaka's mind switching thing."

"Interesting." And it really was, because from everything she knew about the Yamanaka's techniques, they were incredibly hard to break out of. "Well, she seems to be serious about learning medical ninjutsu. And Tsunade-sama says that she is excellent at chakra manipulation already. I haven't seen her much, since I've been at the hospital so much..."

"She was very good, even as a child," Namida said, tapping her nails against the side of her teacup. "But she never had much physical strength, and last time I taught her, her taijutsu was a mess. But that was over a year ago, so she might have improved a bit."

"Ah. Well, I guess we'll see. Eventually."

It was a little odd, Tsunade taking on a new apprentice. As far as she knew, Shizune had been the first and, until now, the last. It was almost unsettling, this new arrangement.

But then, everything was new. It was all new, tinged with memories of familiarity and phantasms of the past. Everything. Even sitting here, now, with three old friends, it wasn't the same. Yes, there was Genma and Raidou and Namida and they were all the same, except they weren't. Namida had her smile and her laughter and her glasses, but she tensed every time she glanced out to see the rain, and there were scars running across Raidou's face and pulling at the skin around his eye and the corner of his mouth, and Genma was Genma, except he seemed to much older, so much sadder, and it was almost as though the little boy she had known so long ago was completely gone. They were all talking about things she didn't understand, laughing over things she didn't know, and there was this horrible gap between them and herself, and in some of the moments, where she sat silently beside them as they talked, it was almost as though there was no bridge across that gap, no way to get over to where they were, that the world had torn itself apart and there was no way, no way to get the gap, the dark, deep chasm to close.

And then Namida would tease Raidou about something, and he would spit back some remark that sounded so scathing and horrible, and yet his eyes would be sparkling with humor, and Genma would turn to her and smile at her, and everything was so wonderfully all right that the gap closed right up and she could almost jump across, could almost leap forward, could almost forget that so much of the unknown lay between all of them now.

Almost.

They sat and talked and ate and laughed for almost an hour, maybe a little less, maybe more. It was raining heavily by that time, the sky dark and heavy with clouds. The restaurant was near empty, but the four of them still sat at their table, not minding that it was growing late.

Eventually, Namida slipped past Raidou and out of the booth, saying she needed to use the bathroom and would be back in a moment. As soon as she was out of sight, Raidou leaned forward, speaking a bit quieter than before, and all of the laughter and humor had completely left his voice.

"Shizune," he asked, and at once she was listening. "Before we got here, was Namida...was she all right?"

"Hm?" It seemed a bit of an odd question, because there hadn't been anything particularly off about Namida and the way she acted, except that... "She...I think so. Until...well, she seemed a bit tense, about the time it started raining, but--"

"Shit." He ran a hand through his still damp hair, clearly agitated. He glanced towards where Namida had disappeared, then sighed. "I'll just take her home; make sure she's all right."

"That's probably a good idea," Genma said, and Shizune felt as though she had missed something entirely. She could hear the conversation, hear all of their words, and yet there was that 'why' of it all that she couldn't quite figure out. "Besides, we should all probably be going. Knowing our luck, we'll end up with some huge mission tomorrow."

"Don't we always?"

When Namida returned to the table, there was a brief—very brief—argument over who would pay for the food and the drinks, although in the end it was decided that they would all pay for whatever they had eaten. Then Genma slipped his flak jacket on and tied his forehead protector around his head, and the four of them left the restaurant.

"It was wonderful talking with you, Shizune," Namida said with a smile as they stood under the overhang outside. "We'll all have to do thing again sometime."

"Of course." It had been nice, it had been fun, just like it had been those few nights ago when they all were at Raidou's apartment. And she did want to spend time with them again, even if Namida could be gratingly annoying at times. "I'll see you all later, then?"

There was a smile and a nod, and then goodbyes all around. Namida playfully slipped her arm through Raidou's, there was a wave of her hand, and then the two of them disappeared out into the rain.

Shizune found herself, almost quite by accident, walking with Genma, who said that he lived in the same direction as her, though quite a ways past her apartment.

The rain was cold, she discovered soon after stepping outside, and even while walking as close to the buildings as possible, as far under overhangs and roofs as possible, she still couldn't keep from getting wet. Eventually she just gave up on trying to stay dry, instead walking out under the rain, her head angled up slightly to catch the drops on her face.

And then Genma laughed, and she was very sure that he was laughing at her.

"Still like the rain?"

"Of course!" She smiled at him, and it felt like a wider, more real smile than any she had given all night. There was this urge to laugh, this bubbling feeling in her stomach, because the rain was falling on her now, and for some reason it just made her feel so wonderful, even though she would be soaked in a few minutes.

Genma glanced up at the sky, long hair beginning to plaster about his face. "Eh, stupid rain."

"It's not stupid!" And then she laughed.

Eventually, though, she sobered enough to ask Genma about the thing she had been wondering about for the latter part of the night.

"Ah, Genma?"

"Yes?"

She pushed rain soaked hair out of her face and looked over at him. "Are Namida and Raidou...seeing each other?"

He glanced at her for a moment, then laughed lightly. "Not that I know of. They always act like that, though, if they gave that impression."

"I see." She didn't ask anything else about it, though she knew that there was a lot more to it. Raidou had seemed so concerned—and almost upset—when he had asked her about Namida. Of course, it could always be that they were just very close as teammates, or as former teammates. Perhaps that was it; Shizune knew, even after so long, that she would worry about Genma and Raidou—and Aoba, even if he had been rather horrible to her the other day. No, it wasn't just that she knew she would worry, but that she already had. She'd felt that awful clenching of the stomach, the horrible rush of worry and fright when she saw them lying on the ground—when she'd felt Genma's heartbeat ebb away--

Perhaps that was all it was. She was most likely over thinking everything to do with Raidou and Namida.

"Are you all right?" Genma asked her, and she was brought out of her thoughts abruptly.

"What? Yes. Yes, I'm fine." The look her gave her was dubious, at best. "What?"

He frowned. "You just...It's only been a few days since you found out about Hayate, and--"

"I'm fine," she said, her words rushing out. She wasn't thinking about that now, wasn't going to think about that right now, and dammit Genma, shut up. "Really, I am." She smiled, which, in hindsight, probably wasn't the best way to assure him that she was all right.

But he didn't say any more about the matter, just gave her this look that she tried her best to ignore.

"Well, this is my place," she said then, because it was, and it was a good way to turn the conversation away from things that she didn't want to talk about. "It was really fun tonight, Genma. I had a wonderful time."

He nodded. "So did I." And then his frown returned for a moment, and he reached out, a finger brushing the side of her neck. "You have blood on you."

"Oh!" She reached up, knocking his hand away. She ran her own fingers over her skin, and they came back tinged a very light pink. "Oh, don't worry. Whatever it is, I'll take care of it. Thank you for walking with me, Genma. I'll...I'll see you tomorrow, or sometime, then."

She smiled, and nearly missed his goodbye as she darted up the stairs, her footsteps light and just a little too quick.

Once inside, she went into the bathroom, staring into the mirror. Around the back and sides of her neck was a line of red tinged water, smeared red against her skin. She frowned, because there was no injury, and then her mouth opened slightly in a silent 'oh' as she saw the chain that she had forgotten about. From the combination of body heat, and then the rain, some of the dried blood had rubbed onto her skin.

She stared for a moment longer, then she pulled the chain and the dog tags out from under her clothing, pulled it over her head. She wiped on her sleeve, attempting to dry it, and then she strode out into the room, opened one of the boxes that held all the pictures from her past, and dropped it inside. Then, in a swift motion, she picked up all the little boxes of pictures, and the albums, and walked to her bedroom, savagely shoving them all under her bed, so hard that she heard them hit the wall on the other side. And then all the memories were out of sight.

A/N: Well, would you look at that. It only took one month for me to update. I'd say that's the shortest update time for this story so far. Probably has something to do with me having interesting Naruto again, as well as the fact that I've been making it a point to write SOMETHING everyday, whether on this story or just a random drabble about something else.

I reread the whole story, did some minor editing (of all the typos and spelling errors, although I'm sure some are still there), and I decided that I really like writing Namida, which is why she ended up being a major part of this chapter.

Anyway, thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed this story. I do hope that you are all enjoying it.

And I'll try to make the next update come within a month, though there are no promises on that.

Raven