Oh, also, Kristina saw Sam shoot Diego, so she was sick.
Chapter Three
Alexis was exhausted. When she walked into the lakehouse, Viola brought her straight back to Kristina's bedroom. Alexis walked in to see her daughter reading three Dr. Seuss books to the sleepy Molly all at once. She was so completely animated and happy. Alexis looked in awe to Viola.
"What happened?"
"I was just talking to her...saying that Molly missed her...the books, the stories, and um...well, I told her that you needed her right now."
"You what?" Alexis wasn't angry, but she didn't want Kristina to think the worst.
"I just said that since you were still sick, you'd need her to make you smile more...I left to answer the phone...oh, by the way, call Jax..."
Alexis nodded.
"Anyway, so I came back, and this is what I walked in on. I haven't interrupted them yet." Viola was extremely proud of her girls.
Alexis smiled to thank Viola then turned her attention to Kristina, "Krissy?"
Kristina turned to see Alexis for the first time and ran in for their hug. Alexis bent down because she knew that she was much too weak to pick her up. Viola scooped Molly up in her arms and stopped to allow Alexis and Kristina to kiss her goodnight. Alexis remained on the floor with Kristina.
"Mom, Molly said 'Fish'!!"
"Really?"
"Yeah, and 'Green', well, it kind-a came out as 'Gween', but, I understood her...oh, and 'Mama' of course, I made her say 'Krissy', but that came out as 'Kwissy'. I think she has a problem with her 'r's." she nodded, walking over to pick up the books.
"Sweetie?" Alexis asked as she stood.
Kristina stopped picking up and gave her full attention to her mother.
"Come sit with me." Alexis led Kristina out onto the porch and they sat looking out at the lake. Kristina snuggled in close to Alexis and didn't take her eyes off of her.
Kristina smiled up to her mother, "Are you feeling better?"
"Oh, yes honey, much better. Every time I see you and Molly, I feel better."
"What about Sam?"
"Sam, too."
"And Daddy Ric."
"Mmmhmm..."
"And Daddy."
"Yep. Everyone, baby." Alexis pulled Kristina onto her lap, with Kristina's eyes still locked on her face, "But especially my girls. So, are you okay?"
Kristina looked away for the first time to the lake. Alexis was frightened that she would stop talking or responding in any way again, but Kristina's words relaxed her.
"I was scared. Every time I saw her, I saw that boy dead, and her shooting him. I know that it's not real now, but Momma, it was real then right? He died?"
Alexis wanted to lie. She wanted to say that it was all a dream and that her child didn't see her other child kill someone, but she couldn't. She had to be honest. "Yes, baby. He died."
"Sam killed him."
"You shouldn't have seen that darlin'." Alexis wanted to cry.
"She shouldn't have done it," Kristina was crying. Alexis pulled the small girl closer and rocked her back and forth.
"Things happen, baby, horrible things, things that change our lives forever, and even we try, we can't stop them from happening. Sam made a mistake, a huge mistake, and she's going to have to live with that for the rest of her life, but Krissy," Alexis pulled her back to look at her tear stained face, "You don't have to worry about that. Okay? You don't have to worry about Sam, or your Daddy, or Daddy Ric, or me."
"But you're sick, and they aren't here."
"I'm going to be okay. You're right honey, I am sick, but like I said, when I see you and Molly, I feel better."
"I'm sorry I've been bad."
"You haven't been bad darlin'! What do you mean?"
"I didn't talk to you. I didn't play ..."
"Sweetheart ..." Alexis pulled her even closer, "You were perfect. Everything you do is just perfect, okay? You just being alive makes mommy happy." The two sat together for a while, until interrupted by Viola, who had the phone in her hand.
"Jax." She mouthed to her boss.
Alexis looked down to Kristina and smiled when she realized that she had fallen asleep ... with a smile on her face. Viola traded Alexis ... the phone for Kristina, and took her back to her bedroom. Alexis took a deep breath.
"Yes my favorite ex-husband?"
"Hello, my love," Jax greeted happily.
"Hi."
"How are you feeling?"
"Much better. Kristina's doing better."
"And how are you doing?"
"I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow before the chemo ... we'll find out then."
"Okay. Um ... do you feel up to having dinner with your ex-husband tonight?"
Alexis looked into the house ... her girls were asleep, "Sure ... it's kind-of late though."
"It's okay ... you want me to come pick you up?"
"No, I can get there ... your apartment?"
"Yep."
"Give me an hour?"
"Yep. Love you."
"Love you, too."
Jax hung up the phone and turned his attention to Ric, "All right man, don't make me regret this."
Ric smiled, "I promise, you won't."
Jax nodded, still wary about lying to Alexis about which particular ex-husband she'd be dining with tonight, but Ric assured him that they'd only talk.
"She'll be here in an hour. I'll be back in three hours."
"Okay. Thank you, Jax."
"Ric?"
"Yeah ..." Ric looked up from fixing the flowers on the table.
"You make her cry ... just one little tear … and you're dead."
Ric took in the seriousness of the threat. He knew that Sonny or Jason could kill him for many reasons, but he was treading on very thin ice with the tall blond in front of him and he cared more about this threat than all of the others. Jax was only out for Alexis' best interest. Ric would prove to him that he was too.
Jax left ... Ric was alone ... two candles ... a small meal for two spread out before him ... flowers ... a knock at the door. Ric's heart beat faster.
Alexis didn't dress up. She almost even thought about changing into her pajamas and driving over, but went the other way. She opened the door to the muffled, "Come in" she heard behind the door and sucked in an angry breath before slamming the door.
"What the hell?!"
"Calm down."
She shot him a death glare.
"Okay, don't calm down, but come in ... come here." Ric walked closer to her and she gave him her hand. He led her to the couch were they sat, him smiling at her for not running out, her looking to him for answers ... annoyed.
"We need to talk, Alexis."
"Ya think?"
"I think."
"So where to begin? Do you want to start with when you ..."
"No. I want to start by seeing if you're hungry. I have dinner ..."
Alexis looked away to the table in Jax's living room, "I'm gonna kill him."
"Later ... now, let's eat."
"Fine. If I hadn't have skipped dinner, you'd be in so much trouble."
"Like I'm not in trouble anyway," Ric joked and helped her to the table, into her seat. He sat across from her and noticed her eyes following him. They ate in silence, she avoided his gaze and he couldn't take his eyes off of her.
"Dessert?"
"No," Alexis replied, standing up to move back to the couch. She looked back to him as he stood from the table to come join her, "Thank you for dinner."
He nodded and joined her, "I love you."
She didn't respond.
"I do. I love you. I've never loved anyone more."
She rolled her eyes, but kept her attention on him.
"Do you believe me?"
She shook her head in amazement, "Ric. Oh, my God, Ric? If that's true, you have an absurd way of showing it."
Ric looked down to his hands, "Do you want to finalize the divorce?"
She couldn't look away.
"After knowing that I still love you ... that I'll never love anyone else ... that I want to change completely ... that I want you back ... do you still want a divorce?"
Her breathing increased ... how dare he ..."How dare you." She stood, growing angrier by the second, "You CAN'T do this to me, Lansing! You can't put this on my head! YOU slept with my daughter! YOU did that ... not me ... you can't switch things around and say that you did it because you were LONELY ... for God's sake Ric ... I HAD NO IDEA that you were LONELY. I had no idea that you were so mistreated by me ... the horrible wife who for once, had the job that she'd always wanted. Poor you ... RIC ... poor, lonely, mistreated Ric who couldn't deal with the fact that his wife was a success. That his wife didn't need him for anything."
"There it is, Alexis ..."
"I'm talking now. You wanna talk, Ric? Listen first. Shut the hell up and listen to me first. This isn't about Sam. Do you get that? This isn't about Sonny ... or Jason ... or hell, even REESE. Do you remember her? Do you remember what you did to me then?"
"Yes." He looked down.
She was on a roll, walking around the apartment, yelling, screaming when she felt like it. It felt good to let this all out, "This is about us, Ric. This is about how we fell in love when we weren't looking for it. You were trying to get back at Sonny, I was trying to keep my daughter safe, and I fell in love with you. Do you remember? Do you ever think back to that time?"
"Yes."
"When did you first realize that you were in love with me?" Alexis asked boldly, standing strong in front of him.
He looked up into her eyes and stood to match her.
"Do you even know?"
He nodded and walked closer.
She grew more nervous and a little angrier as he stepped closer and closer, putting his hands on her arms.
"What are you doing?" She asked, her voice weaker.
"I just wanted to be closer to you."
She swallowed nervously and looked into his eyes.
"I know the exact moment that I fell in love with you. I also know the exact moment I realized it."
She kept looking, kicking herself now for putting the question out there.
"I realized that I was in love with you that night that you found out that I had known all along that Sonny was Kristina's father. You were on the couch. You were more angry and upset than I've ever seen you, and I realized that I loved you just as much as you loved me. You wouldn't have been so angry at me if you hadn't loved me. That night, and the nights after, I thought back to our short relationship and ... I had been in love with you the whole time I think. I think, no ... I know, that I fell in love with you when I was with you at the hospital for Kristina. I had never met anyone with as much love and strength that you had. I forgot about Sonny when I was with you. I forgot about everything but you when we were there. It scared me. I never knew anyone who could do that to me. You had no idea how much I fought it. There, at the hospital, I was just a friend ... no agenda's ... not then. The moment that I came through the hospital doors after the press conference shooting, and you ran into my arms ..." Ric released her arms and turned from her, looking to the floor, sitting on the couch ... looking up to her again, "… when you wrapped your arms around me then, my heart was yours."
Alexis' body shivered at the memories slightly. Her heart was hurting. Her eyes were fixed on his and she joined him on the couch, not sitting too close.
"You say you love me," she started, closing her eyes to block back the tears, "Ric, you say that you loved me and you still do ... then you know me." Eyes opened to meet his, "You know that I don't just give my heart away to anyone. You know how badly I've been hurt in the past ... with Helena, Stavros, my mother, my sister, Ned, Sonny, and yet, you hurt me more than ..." she looked around the room, "you hurt me more than any of them ever did."
Ric let the tears fall. He had no problem with her seeing his emotion. She was breaking his heart.
"I can't do this." She wiped her own tears and stood, walking to the door, surprised when he beat her to it.
"Alexis, wait ... please," he begged, not thinking twice about kneeling down in front of her. She stood watching him, "Please ... please, don't shut me out ... I'll do anything. Alexis, please, you're it for me. I screwed up. I know. I did the unthinkable ... something that can never be forgotten ... or maybe even forgiven, but please, give me a chance to ..."
"To what?" Alexis interrupted, exhausted, "To explain? To tell me that it didn't mean anything? To tell me that you didn't want it?"
"I didn't. I never wanted her ... I never once wanted her."
"You're a liar."
"I'm not."
"Stop doing this to me ... STOP DOING THIS TO ME!!" She screamed and pushed around him, leaving him alone on the floor looking after her.
She walked in the elevator, not even caring to press the button, and sank to the floor, running her hands over her face, over her scarf on her head, pulling it off and down onto her lap. The doors weren't closing. She reached up to press the lobby button and the doors slowly closed, but not before he could run between them. She looked up to him as he looked down to her. He looked over her face, her hair, what was left of it, and he'd never been more in love.
"This isn't over," he ordered, firm in his belief that he would somehow get her to listen.