a/n: part four, the end of the road

Your solitude is welcome, welcome.

A week later, Jet found Faye in the control room, staring blankly out of the large, round windows. She was clad in pajamas pants that he'd purchased for her a while back, pink with purple hearts, a fashion statement for sure. She was also wearing a black tank and was slumped over so lackadaisically. Her chin rested on her hand, which rested on her knee and the air around her swirled with a bit of sadness.

Knowing she could see him in the reflection if she wanted to, Jet neared her and took a seat by her side. He knew it had been a rough week for her. The morning after she'd returned, he'd woken to find her sitting in the kitchen with her hands wrapped around a mug of coffee. She'd offered him a cup when she'd noticed him and he took it with a small nod of remorse.

He'd asked her when she got back and if she'd talked to Spike. She'd told him what she'd said without any prompting, which had taken Jet off guard. But what had unnerved him was what she'd said. Or what she'd said to Spike, at least. Jet had never known how deep things ran in the girl, but he was finding out now. Suddenly, he was all too thankful that he was a softie, at least where she was concerned.

Looking over at her now, the lights of Tharsis twinkling faintly over her face, he was so very tempted to pull her into a hug. But he wasn't sure if that was overstepping boundaries. There were no real clear-cut boundaries between the two, but he knew when to keep his hands to his self.

"Do you think he'll come back?" Faye asked in barely a whisper.

Sighing, Jet began to think that he could actually get around this question. Six days ago, Spike had left. He packed his meager belongs and presumably stuffed them into the Swordfish. He had climbed into the cockpit, probably lit a cigarette, and he had left them. Again. Jet figured it was because of what had happened between him and Faye. He was actually a little shocked that he was the one who had left. After all, cut and run was more a Faye specialty.

Looking at her again, Jet was no longer so shocked that Spike had run.

Your attitude is welcome, welcome.

"I dunno. He might not," he answered her as best he could, as truthful as he could.

"I didn't want him to leave."

Her voice was quiet and far away. She spoke truth as well. She hadn't meant for him to leave. All she wanted was for this to stop. All of the meaningless lies and pointless touches and all the pain. She didn't want to hurt him and she was tired of him hurting her. But she didn't want him to leave. Would it have been so hard to simply coexist? They could have continued to bicker and fight and do all of those things, they just had to cut the sex…

Yeah…they couldn't simply coexist.

"Spike's…well…shit, I don't know. I don't think I ever did," Jet started. "Do you really want him to come back?"

Jet settled on tossing a question back her way. Sometimes, it was the best that he could do.

"I didn't want him to leave," she reiterated.

Seeing the tears steadily streaming down Jet did pull her to him, then. She didn't stiffen or retract, she simply leaned into him. She could do with more honest hugs. She could do with more warmth and caring. She leaned into him even more, then, and shifted slightly to avoid the where metal met flesh.

Faye chuckled uneasily, then, at the silly thoughts running through her head. She needed more silly thoughts, as well.

"What's got you cracking up," Jet asked her, his voice wafting down to her ear from over her head.

She felt the words rumble through his chest and into the sided of her face and she was comforted by the feeling.

"I was thinking how the two men in my life are made of spare parts. You and your arm; Spike and his eye. This world really is something, isn't it?"

Jet didn't quite get it, but he laughed anyway. Hearing her laugh was better than hearing her cry.

"Do you think if we had Spike's heart replaced with a mechanical one, that he'd actual care? Even for just a second?"

Kissing the top of her head in a tender gesture he was unaware that he was capable of, Jet pulled her in closer into him.

"I don't think there's a machine around that can fix his real problem. It's his brain that needs fixin' and they ain't got a model good enough for the job."

You're solitude is welcome, welcome.

They laughed for a few minutes more. It was a happy sound, for real. It'd been at least a week since a happy sound had come from Faye. It was then, no thanks to Murphy's Law, that they simultaneously heard the sound of the hangar opening. Jet watched as the smile fell from Faye's face. It was almost instantaneous.

She was on her feet quickly, then, and Jet was behind her, albeit a bit more slowly. He had expected her to dash away to her room, but was surprised when she veered towards the sound of a landing ship. Jet wondered briefly if she had her gun on her. If she did, then he wasn't sure if she'd miss this time.

She was quick when she wanted to be, and she definitely wanted to be. He watched her as she dashed into the hangar, figuring whatever Spike got; Spike deserved. Standing in the doorway, he watched her slow to a steady march and keep that stride as she walked up to him. She slapped him first, on the left side. Then again on the right. She manned up next, and punched him again on the left. And Spike took it.

She punched him in the stomach then turned around and messily elbowed him in the ribs. With one more blow, she kicked him hard in the shin and felt him go down with a small grunt of pain. She turned around then and she saw the flinch over his fake eye.

Spike was sure he was going to get a knee to the face, at the very least. He was puzzled when he saw her kneel. He was surprised when she put soft, cool hands on his cheeks, soothing the stings. He almost fell out of his skin when her lips pressed against his. He heard a collective gasp coming from all three adults in the room, but mainly from Jet since his lips were unoccupied.

Faye had gone crazy and there was really no way around that. It had to be the only explanation for this sudden change in behavior. And Spike was very unsure as to what he should do. He figured the best idea was to push her away, but she had initiated it. If he pushed her away, he could be in for that knee to the face. He then thought that maybe he should pull her to him and continue what she had started. But then again, that could also result in knee-to-face related injuries. So he did the only thing that seemed most logical: he did nothing.

But he didn't deny that he liked it, the gentle feel of her lips against his. It was desperately simple and painfully sweet. When he saw her striding towards him, he knew she'd hit him, but he never expected this. His eyes slid to Jet's for a moment, questions pouring out of them but the older man merely shrugged, confused as well. Pulling his eyes back to the woman in front of him, he let his eyes slip close and just…enjoy this. He was sure it'd be the last time.

When she finally pulled away from him seconds later, she scooted back and stood up, eyes on him the whole time. She watched as he reluctantly stood and noticed the hand marks and bruise already forming on his face. A small part of her now near regretted hitting him. She had wanted to stop all of this pain, after all. But beyond that, she had almost wished she'd hit him again. But the time for that had passed now. Shaking her head and pushing stray purple strands out of the way, Faye gave Spike a small smile.

"You weren't supposed to leave," she sighed. She sounded so tired. She was so tired. Turning around and walking back to Jet, she sighed again. "You're right, there's no technology capable yet."

Your attitude is welcome.

Later that night, or early next morning actually, Faye had gotten the sudden urge for a cup of hot chocolate. Knowing that a search of the kitchen would turn up no cocoa mix whatsoever, she did the next best thing. Melting half a chocolate bar in a mug then pouring warm milk over it was the best she could do. It was a delicious effort.

Venturing outside of the ship, Faye sat on the hull of the ship and stared out over the water. The subtle rocking of the boat was a soothing feeling and almost put her to sleep. It was when a body sat down next to her that she perked up again. By the smell alone, she knew it was Spike. That smell of cigarettes and spice and regret would always be instantly recognizable. She didn't have to look at him to know he was staring at her. She could feel it, almost as if he was touching her.

"I know why you hit me," he started softly, a slight chuckle to his voice, "And you hit me good, too. But why…kiss me?"

He left the question simple. He knew that an extra word, one way or another, could spiral this situation out of control.

"You sound surprised, Spike. I'm not being hypocritical," she assured him. She had a feeling she knew what he was thinking.

"I never said you were."

"In my own, twisted way, I was letting you go. I 'set you free'. And I took it all back: you have no power over me. Not anymore. And I sealed it…with a kiss. Fitting, no?"

Spike looked away from her then and processed what she'd said. He felt like he almost understood what she meant, but many of the words still rang of Latin.

"I never had any power over you, Faye," he told her, still trying to sort thing sort in his head.

"But that's were you're wrong, Spike…you definitely did. I wanted you to want me. I wanted that so much. That's how you got it…that's how you got to me."

Nodding in the dark, he understood her a bit better, now. He knew what it was like to sacrifice yourself just to get a piece of something unattainable. He wasn't sure how he hadn't recognized it in Faye. It's probably because he hadn't wanted to recognize it.

"Sorry," he told her, honestly meaning the word. "I know how that blows…I didn't mean to put you through that."

Sipping at her cocoa, which was thankfully still warm, Faye let his words roll through her mind. It sounded sincere, and she hoped that it was. She wanted it to be, so she believed it to be true. Venturing a glance at him, she found he was looking at her. He offered her a light smile and she took it, giving him one as well.

"So…where'd you go?"

"I went to…think"

You are welcome…

"Think, eh? You couldn't do that here?"

"Nah…I needed a fresh place to clear my head."

"And where, prey tell, was this magical land?"

"I went to the cemetery."

"…Oh…well, that's…whatever works, I guess." Faye really would never understand him.

"It's quiet," he offered her. "And it's usually empty."

"So, you were at a cemetery for six days?"

"You were keeping count?" He asked her, a smirk quite evident in his voice.

"I said you didn't have power over me, I didn't say I was forgetting about you in general."

"If you say so," he continued to smirk.

You are welcome…

"That phrase sounds familiar, the power thing."

"Does it?" Faye asked, knowing well that she had plagiarized that line.

"What's it from?"

"Are you saying that I can't think things up all on my own?"

"Well, I know you're not stupid, but no one could claim that you have a way with words."

"Screw you, Spiegel," she smirked back to him.

"I rest my case."

A minute of two of silence stretched between the two of them then. It wasn't a tense silence, though. It was oddly…pleasant. The tension that always surrounded them was no longer as crushing. It was comforting, almost, the thought that maybe, just maybe, the two of them could coexist, simply, became more of a possibility. Faye smiled to herself, then.

"It's from The Labyrinth. I loved that movie. And David Bowie wasn't so bad to look at, either," Faye told him finally.

"The what? David who?"

"I swear, kids today..." Faye laughed aloud.

Spike laughed too. It was a good feeling.

You are welcome.

"You were right about what you said," Spike finally told her. "I knew what I was doing and I honestly wish I hadn't. Jet was also right…you…you didn't deserve that."

Looking at him again, Faye gasped lightly. Maybe thinking in a cemetery was a way to clear your head. She didn't really think he'd thought much on what she said, and she really hadn't expected an apology. Another apology.

"You're a good girl, Faye. You've got one hell of an attitude problem, but a good person nonetheless. I took advantage of that. But I won't anymore. Not like that. I don't want to hurt you anymore.

"And I don't hate you. I could pretend to, hell, I did, but I…I don't hate you. And I'm not disgusted with you, either. If I ever made you feel that way, and I know I did, it was only me putting how I felt about me onto you. I didn't want to hate myself, so I tried to hate you instead. That was a real asshole thing for me to do."

"You shouldn't have to pick up my pieces and you shouldn't feel like you have to keep me happy. You can't live for me just like I can't live for you. Things got really fucked up for a while, Faye, but…but maybe we can try and keep things from getting back like that again."

Processing his words, Faye found she was very grateful for what he said. So much so that it almost brought her to tears. He was really good at that, causing her to cry and all. But she kept it in. He had no hold over her anymore, right?

"Thank you," she said tentatively. "I didn't really think you thought too much about it, but I guess you did. I…just…thanks."

He glanced at her again and noticed her hand outstretched. He cocked an eyebrow at her and with the sparse lighting from the city in the darkness he knew she noticed the look on his face.

"Let's shake on it," she told him. "You know, let bygones be bygones and all that. Let's just put this behind us and let it go, 'kay?"

Spike nodded at her. It sounded like a good idea. He was glad she suggested it. If he had have done it, it wouldn't have worked, but she said it, so it was okay to move on from it. But instead of grasping her hand, he bypassed that and settled his lips on hers.

You are welcome…

Her eyes went wide and she wasn't sure if she should push him off. But he wasn't insistent in the kiss and he wasn't forceful or brash. It was nothing more than a simple kiss, a simple conformation. She let it happen and neither were looking for something out of it. He pulled away from her seconds later and smiled at her again. No smirks this time.

"A handshake wouldn't do?" She breathily asked him. Then she almost cursed herself for sound breathy to begin with.

"Let's just say we're sealing this with a kiss." Now he was smirking at her.

"You such an ass, you know that, right?" She asked him with laughter in her voice.

"There's that eloquence again."

Laughing aloud now, Faye simply shook her head. Getting to her feet, she held out her hand again in an attempt to help him up.

"No need to seal anything this time," she said as he eyed her.

He grasped her hand and hauled himself up. Letting go, he gestured and she walked in front of him. They both entered into the Bebop and headed towards their rooms. Neither said anything on the way, there really wasn't anything left to say right then. Bygones and all.

"So…you're gonna stay this time, right?" Faye asked as her room came into view. "I mean, as long as you normally hang around, that is."

"Can't let you run me out, now can I?" He smirked again. "People we talk if that happens."

Rolling her eyes, Faye opened her door and went in. It'd been a long week and she was dog tired.

"Goodnight, Spike," she said quietly.

"Sleep well, Faye."

You are welcome.

"Oh, and Faye?"

"I just couldn't get away that easily, huh?"

"Now where would the fun in that be?"

Turning back to him and give her full, undivided attention (right), she cocked an eyebrow at him, crossed her arms, and waited for whatever he'd have to say.

"I wasn't always trying to pretend it wasn't you."

And with that, he disappeared into the darkness of the ship. He did that a lot. He had it down to a science by now. Rushing to the doorway, she could barely make out his retreating form, but she called out to him still.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She whispered loudly at him. It was a mix of confusion and more confusion that held in her voice.

"Well…what's it sound like?" His voice floated through the dark to her.

"I'm not her, Spike. I don't want to be."

"I know you're not. I don't want you to be, either. Now go to sleep, Faye."

She heard his door close but she continued to linger for a few moments longer. She pulled back into her room then and closed her door as well. Faye wasn't sure if she should be mad, sad, or what, exactly at what he had said. It was like he'd break out in hives if he ever gave her a straight answer. But that was a part of the constant dance they did and it wasn't going to change anytime soon.

By the time she'd crawled into bed and settled into a position ripe for sleeping, she settled on an emotion. She was content. That's the best she could ever hope for as long as Spike was involved. She would never be happy with him, there was just too great a distance for them to breach. But he was okay with who she was. At least that's what she got from what he had said. Even though she would have liked to believe that his opinion of her didn't matter, it had just been a week. No one healed that fast.

His thoughts of her still mattered. He­ still mattered. And she figured he always would so long as she allowed it. As long as things never went back to how they were before, she figured she could permit the behavior a little longer.

Welcome. Welcome.

It was nearly noon when Faye woke up. She contemplated going back to sleep, but reluctantly pulled herself up anyway. Jet had promised to go to the mall with her and Ed and since it was a rare, icy cold day in Hell when Jet ever agreed to go to the mall of all places, she refused to miss the opportunity. So she tugged her lazy bones up and dressed herself before slinking to the bathroom.

She noticed a note on her door as she exited and easily concluded that it was from Spike. He had terrible handwriting. Reaching up and grabbing it, she opened it and scanned it. She couldn't help but smile.

'I'd never be your slave, Faye, just as you'd never fear me or love me or do as I say. But that's okay; I think we've already come to our compromise. By the way, no, I wasn't at the cemetery for six days straight. I'm crazy, not stupid (no laughing). Maybe one day I'll tell you where I was…then again, maybe I won't. Bygones, right? I don't think I said it last night, so just in case: thanks.

Oh, and see? I'm not all dumb. I told you I'd heard that line before.'

Faye crumpled the note and tossed it in her room. Still smiling, she headed for the kitchen. That lunkhead would forever continue to surprise her. Rounding into the kitchen, she saw him sitting there as if expecting her. A mug of coffee was waiting for her and she accepted it with that feeling of content. They were going to be friends, as much as they could be.

"I got it," she said after a few sips, knowing he'd understand. "And you're welcome."

Smirking at her, he stood and headed out of the kitchen.

"And…same to you…thanks and all…again," she told him after another sip.

"Heh, yeah…anytime time, Faye."

"Oh, and you're no Goblin King," she smirked back at him.

"Well I should certainly hope not," he said in a garish faux-Brit accent. "I could never pull off the tights."

She laughed at him as he faded away from view, the thought of Spike in tights emblazoned in her mind.

'Welcome, indeed,' she thought and she took another sip of her coffee.

WELCOME, WELCOME,
SPACE COWBOY…

and that's it. did you like it? i hope so. oh, and the labyrinth references...i'd apologize, but i like them there too much. kinda cheesy, i know, but i couldn't help it. so let me say that i also don't own the labyrinth. i hope you enjoyed and i'm glad you stuck around and read this. thanks for stopping by and you stay classy!