The Adventure's of L, Light'n, Larry: The Death Before Christmas

Disclaimer: We do not own death note but we do own a bucket of melted cheese.

It was one week before Christmas… or maybe it was one month…After last night's party I don't know what is what anymore.

There was a silhouette of a tall man on someone's lawn. He kept saying "Jaaam!" with pulses in the "aaa" part. It was around two in the morning. He scoped the house for a while, touching the walls… and himself. It was dark, I couldn't tell.

He eventually found a door in the front of the house. Slowly, he opened it and crept inside. When he stepped inside of the house, he screamed…"Ding-Dong DIDDY!" I'm not completely sure what happened next, but I heard an old woman screaming. Then I saw him coming outside with a full trash bag, I ran back home. And here I am now!

That whole story was told by Light. L, Light'n, Larry were all in Light's room having a sleepover. They were getting ready to play Super Mario Brothers on Light's NES. They had a big bowl of cheese blocks, carefully assorted by L (WOO HOO! CHEESE!).

"How the hell are we supposed to play a one player game when we have three peeps?" L asked.

" " Larry answered.

"Oh that's right! You are damn smart Larry!"

"!" Larry exclaimed. The door to their room bust open. Light's father came in wearing nothing but underwear made of cookies

"Hey wassup homeyos!" Soichiro asked.

"Daddy put some friggin clothes on!" Light ordered.

"Sorry, I ate the tuna and the turkey is still cooking!" Soichiro stated as he pointed to a bag of chips on Light's desk

"Chips Ahoy!" Soichiro said grabbing the bag of chips and leaving.

"So, Light, what are your parents getting you for Christmas?" L asked.

"I dunno probably an ice tray… Or a carrot costume." Light answered. "What about you, L?"

"I don't have parents." L said happily. "You, Larry?" L asked.

"" Larry stated.

"Damn, you don't even deserve all that!" Light said. "Who are your parents anyways?" He asked.

""Larry reminded.

"Oh yeah, WE are! That was a craaaazy day!" Light said. He pointed his finger at the NES, and it became a Wii

"What the hell is THAT?" L asked.

"It's from the footure!" Light exclaimed like an idiot.

"What games does we get?" L asked.

"SUPER PAPER MARIO!" Light yelled in a squecky, high pitched voice. They played for a few hours, singing the Weird Al Show Theme the whole time.

"" Larry suggested.

"Yeah, we should go dumpster diving! This is boring!" L said.

They threw the Wii at the wall and walked outside.

"It's a camel!" A mother said as the future Matsuda came out of her tummy. "Or it might be a boy." She added.
"Oh yeah, the camera loves you, come on, take off that small shirt!" A camera man said to the famous child porn star, Misa.
The three heroes… or was it criminals… oh well… they went back to the dumpster behind Reasols, they started digging through all the garbage.

"I found an axe! A bloody axe!" Light said, holding a bloody can of axe spray. Light pushed the button to spray. A fat hoe walked by the dumpster, sexually moaning.

"I found… The Bill of Rights!" L exclaimed "And it says I can get a tax deductible… just by slowly taking off my pants! I'll be right back." L added

"But you're a kid! You don't gotta pay no taxes!" Light said.

"I ain't no kid! My DIC… tionary says otherwise!" L yelled. L opened his dictionary.

Kid- a young goat (n) (subject) (bitch). After closing the book and sticking out his tongue, he started squeezing it.

"I love squeezing my DIC… tionary!" L added.

"!" Larry screamed.

"Stop lying." L said.

"No, L, there really is a fat old lady corpse here!" Light exclaimed. L and Light opened the dumpster doors and started jumping on the corpse.

"BOUNCY!" They yelled. A little baby came out of a fat roll of the corpse.

"Goo goo gahgee!" (Translation: that's why you're number one Light!) It said. Light gave a thumbs up to the camera as it closed in on him.

"Let's go play toss the Dynamite!" L said.

"What about the corpse?" Light asked.

"LA-TER!" L answered.

The three went to a nearby park with their dynamite in hand. They hit the ON button, and the timer was set to ten minutes.

"Catch, L!" Light shouted, throwing the bomb, L caught it and tossed it to Larry.

"Catch it Larry!" He shouted. The dynamite landed on the grass.

1 minute later…

"It's okay, Larry, take your time." L said, calmly.

Will Larry EVER throw the dynamite? To be continued…
Wolflink93: This is our Christmas special The Death before Christmas Part 1 (Just for those people who didn't read the title) There will probably be maybe a total of 3 or 4 parts to this story so stay tuned.

Renodin: AND PLEASE REVIEW I BEG OF YOU... I HAVE TO PEE!