ok so i am trying to keep going with this story but i am just so busy with school and the holidays coming up and everything but i will try to update as much as i can....thanks for reading
A week after we got home I went back to work. The day I had been dreading. I didn't exactly leave on a good note. People didn't like me when I left and now that Luka is back at the hospital more rumors are going to start about us.
I just keep thinking about when Neela told me that everything will turn out ok, things are far from OK in my house. Luka and I are very distant, we don't even talk to each other anymore. I feel that Joe is picking up on the tension between us now and that scares me. I don't want him to suffer because his dad and I are going through a rough patch in our relationship.
Joe will try to get us in the same room at the same time and he will also start to scream the minute he hears one of us yell. I am not sure if our yelling scares him or he just wants to be the loudest one in the house as he is not crying, he just yells. Joe is also starting to misbehave more and more like breaking glass objects from our coffee table or pulling down all the blinds, things he never used to be interested in.
My first day at work, well was surprisingly welcoming. I guess with being gone for a month people had time to get over my past and forgive me. Except Sam, she still avoids me and wont take orders from me, I think part of it is because a couple of years ago she was with Luka and she said she "loved" him.
Luka told me that he could tell that she wasn't over him when he told her that I was pregnant. I mean that was ok at the time since it wasn't interfering with my patients but now it is becoming a problem. It is jealousy. I was totally jealous when I found out that Luka and Sam were dating. Then I would see Luka playing basketball with Sam's kid and think to myself, wow I wish that were me.
Now it is me, or at least I hope. Anyway back to the hospital. People were helping me get back in tune with working a 12 hour shift. Let me tell you those were some of the hardest hours of my life. I had to push myself to my limit and I don't do that often. It is amazing how much I was behind just from missing a month of work. The admit area was changed and the sign in chart was also changed. I have to get used to the way things work around here…again.