Prompt: Pandora's box

There was a curious state between fact and rumor where most high school myths lay. They were too widespread to be mere gossip, but based on too flimsy evidence to be proven true.

One such belief, held by everyone who was not named Emiya Shirou, was that Ryudo Issei was the gayest person in the entire high school.

Another such belief, held by everyone who was not a woman or named Emiya Shirou, was that Matou Shinji was a bastard - all the faults and evils of the human race wrapped up in one unassuming package. (Rumors at Fuyuki High School tended to be a bit exaggerated.)

Naturally, these two came to a head.

Ryudo Issei and Matou Shinji stared each other down as the remaining students filed out past them.

"Is there something you'd like to say, Matou?" Issei asked calmly.

"Stop monopolizing Emiya's time," Shinji answered bluntly. "He should be doing his duties for the archery club, not working for you."

"Really? I was under the impression that he was no longer part of the archery club, not since you drove him out. Isn't it his business what he chooses to do with his time?" the student council president replied.

Shinji smiled thinly. "But he's not a student council member either, is he? So why would he spend all his time with you?"

Issei shrugged. "You would have to ask him. Perhaps he prefers fixing appliances to routine cleaning, or perhaps he just would prefer not to see you."

The archery club's vice-captain's eyes narrowed. "Oh? You're saying he prefers your company to mine, oh Hermit of Fuyuki High?"

"If you were going to pick one of the insulting nicknames for me, that was probably the least effective one you could have chosen," Issei advised him. "And it's possible. Clinginess tends to drive away some people, after all."

Shinji's smile disappeared completely. "Cl-clinginess!?"

"If it were any other member of the archery club who left, would you demand that they stay, or would you not care at all?" Issei wondered aloud. "You treat Emiya like dirt, yet you refuse to let him leave you. He's the only man who genuinely likes you, and the more he likes you the worse you are on him. Really, Matou. Relationships like that are unhealthy-"

"How dare you!?" Shinji raged. "You're one to talk! At least I'm not following Emiya around like a lovesick-"

"I am not lovesick," Issei snapped, taking a step closer to Shinji.

Shinji didn't notice. "So you haven't been pining over him for years? And he doesn't even know you feel that way about him, how sad."

"Be quiet," Issei said, advancing another few steps. "Be quiet-"

"It must kill you to know that he'll never feel the same way," Shinji continued. "And even if you ever did work up the nerve to confess, he'd probably-"

Normally, one would expect that the student council president could not pin the vice-captain of the archery club against the wall.

However, this would not be taking into account the vice-captain's fairly poor physical strength, and the fact that the student council president's adoptive elder brother had not only trained him in basic self-defense, but also had possibly foreseen that he would need to pin someone against the wall and kiss them just to shut them up. (A lot of people were under the impression that said adoptive elder brother had foreseen everything in the next twenty years.)

Shinji had expected none of this. He also had not expected Issei to bite down on his lower lip hard enough to draw blood, or to suddenly break apart from him like he'd been burned, or to storm off angrily.

That… had gone badly.