Author's note:I sadly only own Taka in this story, whose clothing and occupation is still taken from Kishimoto-sensei's manga, Naruto. All other cool characters, like Gaara, belong to the original authors, Kishimoto-sensei and Kubo-sensei. What if I owned Gaara? The world would probably end... or I would quit writing and hog Gaara all to myself. ;P
It's up pretty quick this time, I know. I was in a writing mood, and thus... TA-DA!
Please review! I love those things!
Taka suddenly rushed in, out of breath from running. His general Konoha ninja attire was a bit damp with his sweat. "Lady Hokage! I was walking down the street when I happened to notice that the unruly group I captured earlier was escaping by the window and--" He turned to see no Hokage or the squad she was assigning the mission to, only that unruly group. He quickly turned to give a suspicious glare at the leader. "Hey Orange Head! What did you do to Lady Hokage and Team Kakashi? he asked in the bitterest tone.
A vain popped in Ichigo's head. That man just made fun of my hair again, he thought, but he knew better in the current situation (for once in his life) than to go and yell at him for it. He realized he and the other soul reapers would have been accused of taking that Hokage lady and the other ninjas. "I honestly don't know. While you were gone, Hanataro here popped in here magically," he pointed to Hanataro, hoping that a new person present would make it believable, "and he had some sort of tracker and walkie talkie, and our friend talked to us on the walkie talkie and was telling us how to get back home. He said jump out the window when he counted to ten, and then we just fell and were still in your town. We climbed back up the stairs, and those friends of yours were no longer there."
Jumping out the window to get back home? Taka thought. Either he's telling the truth, or he came up with a really ridiculous lie. He does seem kind of stupid enough to make up such a dumb story; let me test him a bit. "Jumping out the window? Do you think I am that dumb? That has to be the worst lie ever. Prepare to die!" Taka reached into his back pocket and pulled out a sharp kunai knife. He started to charge at the carrot top head on until the sound of a blade being pulled out of a sheath and striking his kunai stopped him.
"All right, I know that story sounded pretty bogus," said a violet-eyed girl, holding up her zanpaktou against Taka's kunai, staying strong, "especially coming from Ichigo," another vein popped in the background. "But it was the truth. If you knew our friend, Mr. Kisuke Urahara, you would know most of his inventions and ideas are pretty abnormal. Jumping out of a window was one of the…" she paused, looking for the right words, "less harmful ones. Please, leave us be, and we will help find your Hokage and the other ninjas. "
Looking deep into those violet eyes, Taka could see nothing but the truth. He had to believe her, so that carrot head was telling the truth. Plus, by looking into the eyes of every other person in that room, he could easily tell that if he laid one finger on this girl, all hell would break loose. She was obviously cared for very deeply. "All right, I believe you," he said, letting his kunai down and putting it back in his pocket. "But now, you must stick to your promise. Would you please wait here while I get someone of a higher rank to handle this situation?"
"Of course," said the violet eyes.
"All right, please excuse me." Taka went and made a few hand signs, and he vanished into a puff of smoke.
"Thanks, Rukia, we owe you one!" shouted Renji. "Especially you, Ichigo."
"I don't owe her anything," Ichigo folded his arms across his chest and turned his head to avoid direct eye contact. "I could've taken that guy out."
"I would've liked to see you try," said Rukia.
"Oh yeah? Well—"
"No fighting, you three. If that guy comes back and sees a bloody mess, I believe it will be hard to convince whomever he brings that we are innocent," ordered Toushirou. Byakuya nodded his head in agreement. This made two of the three to follow the order, and since the last one had no one to fight against, he gave in as well.
The group of ninjas fell out of the teleporter's doorway. A shocked man wearing a hat looked up at the one wearing orange in the group. "Ichigo? Is that you?"
"If it is, he has a worse fashion taste than he did before," snickered Jinta.
The group that just fell in moaned and groaned, feeling the pain of falling on top of each other.
"Get off me, you pervert!" screamed a pink-haired girl. She pushed the poorly dressed Ichigo off of her. Her facial expression matched the rage that was in her voice.
"S—sorry, S—Sakura." His hand landed on the area between her neck and stomach. Luckily, she pushed him off before he squeezed anything.
"Hello, Ichigo?" again asked the hat man.
The boy he was referring to looked up to the man and said "No, I'm Naruto Uzumaki, and one day, I'm gonna become Hokage!" Some how, he was always able to say it with the same amount of enthusiasm as he did the first time, and the second time, and the—
"Do you have to say that every time you give your name?" asked the dark-haired one of the group.
Sasuke, I know you. You're looking for a way to look cool in front of all these new people. Well, I'll show you, the knucklehead thought. "Well Sasuke, I'm getting a title for myself when I get older, known all over thanks to my introductions, and you will be a nobody." He grinned. Got him now.
"Right. That's why every time I go with you somewhere, every one already knows who you are. They say 'An Uchiha! The last one, Sasuke! The Sharingan! It sees all! The Number One Rookie!' and that's why everyone challenges me looking for a good fight instead of you," the fire-style user said sarcastically.
Naruto, already losing after such a good lead, replied, "Well…. They don't know you here! HA!"
"Sasuke Uchiha? The number one rookie with the all-seeing eye? The Sharingan? Why didn't you tell us? Take a seat over here!" offered the man wearing that hat. He started to pull Sasuke away from the group towards a comfy chair, the only one in the basement. Sasuke turned and smirked at Naruto.
DAMN YOU, SASUKE! Naruto put a scowl on his face that probably won't come off in awhile.
What they didn't know is that the hat man only overheard what Sasuke said and repeated it. Luckily, the "next Hokage" didn't come up with that reason, so he could have his fun.
"Ha, Naruto. See? Sasuke is so much more popular than you will ever be," said Saukra. "You have nothing on him."
"Now Sakura, don't push it—" Kakashi said.
"AGHH! SASUKE! GET OVER HERE NOW AND FIGHT ME!"
"Now, now, you knucklehead. We can't have Sasuke fighting you. He is much too important to go and waste his time and efforts on you" said Hat man. Another grin from Sasuke. He liked this guy.
"Boss, can I speak to you for a moment?" asked a big man with tiny glasses set upon his face.
"I know what you're thinking, but this is so much fun!" he whispered to his employee. 'He's just like Ichigo! Maybe worse! But, I suppose I better get to business now." With a sigh, he went and asked Sasuke "Where are you from, again? I know you are a great, almighty Uchiha, but the village's name you come from escapes me." He looked at the ninja's headband. "Something with leaf, I think?"
He sure made good assumptions, that hat guy. "The Village Hidden in the Leaves—Konoha," the number one rookie replied.
"Oh right! How could I forget?" he sure was a good actor as well. "Do you mind introducing me to thee others you were traveling with?"
Sasuke grunted. He didn't mind talking when it was about himself, but when it was about others, he could care less. A waste of words. "Kakashi, Sakura, Hokage, Gaara, and the runt, Naruto." He pointed to each person as he said their names.
"Thank you, Sasuke-sama. How did you get here?"
"Well, some guys in black kimono things were trying to get home and they jumped out the window on the northwest side because the tracker told them to. Oh, and they jumped when it was the count of ten. But, I think they just fell out the window, and we were sucked into the portal instead. We were sitting in the same room as them, but we moved to another area of it, out of the way. I suggested we leave the room entirely, but the Hokage and Kakashi agreed that it was best we watched them."
"Very knowledgeable. I could expect nothing less from one of the Uchiha clan." How did I screw up this time? Northwest window… ten seconds count... press button 17 and 34, pull lever 6, and force open gate. That should have brought them home even if they were in another plant or dimension. Obviously Hanataro, wanting to heal Rukia and Ichigo, got to them safely…The tracker was white and the cube on the teleporter was green, connecting Konoha to this place. "Would you excuse me? I need to talk with my employees over there," he pointed to them. Sasuke thought it was a strange place, to employ two kids and a tall guy like that, but he just shrugged it off and gave him permission. Maybe I ought to see if the tracker's communication port still works… then I can get Ichigo's view of the story.
"Boss, I can't get any strange readings. Everything should have worked fine. I'm not sure why it brought these people back instead," Tessai, the big man with the glasses told him.
"I know… I can't figure it out…. WAIT!" Hat man ran back to Sasuke, who went back to sit with Naruto and the others.
"Which way was the sun facing at the time?" he asked.
"It was morning, still, so rising in the east," replied Kakashi.
"Oh, I see, thank you." Damn it! I didn't prepare for time differences. If it was still rising, it should have been northeast! And they must have been sitting around the northeast area— "Tell me, were you sitting more northeast while waiting for them to leave?"
"Yes, I believe so, right Lady Hokage? The couch you had in the office was on the northeastern side of the room?" replied Kakashi.
"What? Oh, yeah. Northeast." Lady Hokage was out of it. She wanted that mission to be assigned and the trouble with Naruto over, but now she had a feeling she would be stuck with him for awhile. She sighed.
"Oh, I see, thank you. Come with me upstairs to a more comfortable area and I'll explain your current situation for you, and see if I can do anything about it."
"Upstairs?" asked Gaara quietly in as few words as possible to get his question across. He never does speak much, but that is his character. He looked around. It looked more like outside than inside.
"Oh, right, this is my basement. It's supposed to be like an old training ground I had. But please, follow me. I'm sure you would like some tea and have some questions for me. I'm Kisuke Urahara, by the way."
The group of ninjas followed the man named Urahara, who Naruto decided to call him Hat Man, since Urahara was kind of a mouthful to day. They were in for a long story, now, weren't they?
Author's Note Part 2: Gaara needs more lines! But it's so hard to get him to talk while still being Gaara, you know? This story is mainly comedy, and poor Gaara just thrown in for the ride. But I'm happy he's part of it. I love him. ;)
Naruto is supposed to be like Ichigo, in the fact that he comes up with a nickname for Urahara, similar to Ichigo's nickname for him, Mr. Hat-and-Clogs. ;) Although, Hat Man is like Batman. Ha. I suppose I'll have to bring that up.
Current Results of the 'Whose Worse Than' competiton, as the author tries and keeps up with it herself:
(I say this with an announcer voice, like a horse race)
-Naruto started it off just by being Naruto.
-Ichigo became worse than Naruto because of Aizen obsession.
-Renji beat Ichigo out by being stupid and saying they were too north and not enough west.
-But Naruto reclaimed the title by trying to argue with Sasuke over coolness.
Current Title Holder: Naruto Uzumaki
Apparently, the "Whose Worse Than" competition is who can be called the dumbest by the end of this fan fiction. So, "Who is Worse in the Head Than the Previous Title Holder" would be the best way to put it. ;)
Is this competiton pointless? I'm having fun with it, though. Please comment in your review. PLEASE? I'll share Gaara with you then when I own him. ;)