And the Fun Just Keeps Coming
"Good Morning Kevin," Josephine said as she sat at the kitchen table nursing a cup of tea. "Actually, it's 'Good Afternoon' seeing that it's a little before one."
"Oh my head," Darling groaned as he stumbled into the kitchen. "What a night! The Ghost Thwacking Twins nearly beat me to death thinking I was a monster. Then they almost finished the job trying to wash and nurse me back to health! I will never look at a scrub brush the same way again!"
"Oh come now Captain. I had a magnificent night," George grinned as he sat and ate brunch.
"Really?" Darling twitched and took a seat. "Tell me what you did Lieutenant."
"Oh well, you know that Doris gave me an absolutely wonderful massage," George explained munching on some toast. "Did the shoulders, back, legs, etc. Her hands must have worked over just about every inch of me."
"I see," Darling gritted his teeth and started toying with a knife.
"Yes. However, I was so relaxed I fell asleep while she was kneading my neck," George said happily. "Had a spiffingly enjoyable dream too. Lots of bunnies everywhere eating a big strawberry shortcake with cream and custard."
"Oh joy," Darling drawled and helped himself to some food. "And was Doris with you when you woke up?"
"No, of course not sir," George scoffed. "Since I slept in her bed she went and slept in mine."
"Thank goodness," Darling muttered under his breath.
"She's out shopping or something right now," George said finishing off his toast. "Said she was looking forward to listening to more war stories when she got back."
"How nice," Darling grunted sarcastically. "I'm sure I'll be able to entertain her quite well thank you."
"Hey Squibby!" Pierre entered the room and slapped Darling on the back. "About time you got up. Come on, Baldrick and I have a whole day full of fun planned in the back yard!"
"I can hardly restrain myself," Darling mocked taking a sip of tea. "As much as I'd like to indulge myself in such stimulating mental activities I'd rather just sit here and wallow in my everlasting woe."
"Oh come on Squibby!" Pierre got on his knees and hugged Darling's legs. "Please, please, please! I've been so looking forward to playing with you while you're here! I've missed playing with you so much! No one else ever plays with me! Well no one who's still alive anyway."
"Oh geeze," Darling groaned.
"Please, please, please!" Pierre wailed holding Darling tightly. "I wanna play! I wanna play! Wahhhhhh!"
"Stop that at once!" Josephine shouted at Pierre's display of affection. "You're acting like a spoiled child! Don't worry. Kevin is more than happy to play with you today. That's why he came."
"Auntie, please. Don't make me," Darling protested.
"Kevin!" Josephine glared at him dangerously.
"Uh, yes ma'am," Darling gulped and took a last bite of food. "Alright Pierre, I'll play with you."
"You will? Yay!" Pierre jumped up and did a happy dance.
"Come on. Let's get this over with," Darling grumbled getting up.
"So long chaps! Don't worry about a thing. I'll make sure to greet Doris when she comes back," George called out after them.
"On second thought, come with us Lieutenant," Darling did and about face and grabbed George's arm. "We'd love to have you join us. Some of Pierre's games need four people to play."
"Really? Well slap me with a saddle and put a bridle on my head. Let's go!" George cheered as he and Darling followed Pierre to the back yard.
"Ah, kids," Josephine sighed and sipped her tea. "So innocent and full of energy."
"FOR THE LOVE OF MIKE NO!" Darling was heard screaming in the distance. "PIERRE I AM NOT PLAYING BEAN BAGS WITH YOU AGAIN! THE LAST TIME WE PLAYED I ENDED UP IN THE HOSPITAL WITH A BROKEN ARM AND A RUPTURED SPLEEN!"
CRASH!
"PRIVATE! STOP WAVING THAT LACROSSE STICK EVERYWHERE! NO THAT'S NOT WHERE THE NET PART GOES! AND DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT USING IT TO PICK UP THAT!"
"I'm back!" Doris skipped into the kitchen with a large basket under one arm. "Where is everyone?"
"Oh the boys are out playing in the back yard," Josephine explained. "Let them be. It's good for them. Have a little male bonding time."
"GET AWAY FROM ME PRIVATE!" Darling shouted. "I AM NOT GIVING YOU A PIGGY-BACK RIDE! AND YOU'D BETTER NOT TRY AND GIVE ME ONE EITHER!"
"Pity," Doris sighed slipping into a chair. "I was so looking forward to spending some time with Lieutenant George."
"Yes, he seems like a nice, intelligent young man," Josephine said.
"SPIT THAT OUT LIEUTENTANT! IT IS NOT A SCONE!" Darling shrieked. "OW! OW! PIERRE STOP THROWING THEM AT ME! OW! OW! OW!"
"Pierre seems a little lonely," Doris noted. "It is awfully nice of Kevin to come here and be with him."
"I know. They've always gotten along well together," Josephine smiled. "And Kevin is very understanding."
"NO WE ARE NOT HAVING ANY WHEELBARROW RACES!" Darling yelled. "I DON'T CARE IF YOU JUST GAVE THEM A TUNE UP! WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING? PUT ME DOWN! PUT ME DOWN!"
"You think it would be alright if I went out there and watched?" Doris asked.
"No. You know boys. Never like anyone to bother them when they're having fun," Josephine replied.
"LET ME OUT OF THIS THING!" Darling screamed. "WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING! LOOK OUT FOR THE TREE! DON'T TRY TO JUMP THAT DITCH! AAAHHHHHH!"
"Ah, I love the sound of children at play," Josephine sighed.