Chapter VI – Gone

(Edward's POV)

Carlisle came and stood beside me. I was smiling as I watched the smoke balloon into the air.

I realized I was being smug, and was immediately disgusted with myself. While dwelling on unkind thoughts of myself, Carlisle spoke, "Thank you, Edward. I'm uncertain about deserving your support, but I'm glad I have it all the same." We smiled at each other, and he asked, "Where's Bella?"

I gasped, and was running through the trees. Bella! She'd been calling my name. Bella! As I drew closer to where they were, I heard what was happening through Seth's mind. Sam was unleashing a torrent of hate onto Bella, she was crying and Charlie was screaming.

I saw the arguing, Sam convincing Bella that the only thing she could do for Charlie was to kill him. I heard Charlie, gasping in pain, speak so softly to Bella, "I love you Bella, let me die." I heard her grief stricken sob followed by more denials. I ran, but knew I was too late. I was close enough now that I heard Charlie's final scream as it was cut off. I clutched my hands behind my head, I didn't realize I had stopped until I felt my family all around me.

For once I was grateful I couldn't hear Bella's thoughts. I staggered back several steps. How could I have stood there gloating. One second, one moment earlier and I might have made it. I was an animal, a monster. I'd let this happen, and that horrible dog had made her believe it was her fault. I couldn't hear Bella's thoughts, but I could hear her cries. She was no longer in control of herself in anyway, my heart ached for her, and I wanted to go to her, but what right did I have.

Alice thought my name. I looked at her. It isn't your fault, Edward. Bella needs you now. Go.

I stepped out from the cover of the trees, and saw her there. She was a tiny, fragile heap of delicate glass, cracking under the weight of her despair. I went to her, lifting her gently. Another sob tore from her as I sat down, resting her in my lap and enveloped her quaking frame in my arms. What could I say to her? I just held her. The rain was pouring down on us, and if I could have, I'd have cried tears of such anguish for my poor, broken love.

I knew Carlisle was approaching in the Mercedes, but I didn't want to move Bella. I was so afraid to jar her. When Esme spoke, I knew I had to move. I lifted her and carried her to his car, keeping her on my lap.

When we reached the house, she looked surprised, and said "I thought…there was an explosion? There was smoke? I thought it was the house," her face crumpled into unbearable sadness, "I thought you were gone."

Her beautiful face was so wet, her hair was glued to it, "Yes, I'm afraid that was my fault. I'm also afraid I'm going to have to buy Alice another car." I tried to be light-hearted. I didn't want her to start blaming me now.

Her voice was soft, as she surprised me again with her next question, "Is everyone else alright? Was anyone hurt?"

How could she ask about how we were when she'd just lost her Father? "Oh Bella, we're all fine of course. To worry about our family when-" I clenched my jaw. Worrying about us when her Father had just been killed, and Sam, the beast, had made her feel responsible. Her heart was so good; I fought not to curse him aloud. Her goodness amazed me. "Sweet Bella."

Once inside the house, I carried her to our room. I knew I couldn't leave her until she had worn herself out. My being ached for her, fresh pain shot through me with every sob that wrenched her tremoring frame.

Never before; not in Jacob's shared visions of when I'd left her, not the time when she'd said goodbye to him, had I ever seen her drowning so completely. All night, she drained and drained herself, and still I couldn't think of words to speak. I was horrid, how could I have forced her into this life, into this relationship with a monster. In the very earliest of morning hours she finally wore herself out. I laid her in bed and covered her with the blankets.

In her sleep her brow was furrowed. I couldn't tear myself away. She had no dreams during the night, I suspected she was too exhausted for any. When she awoke in the morning her eyes opened and were dull. I smiled hoping to exact some sort of change in the haunted look I saw there, but it had no effect. Oh, my love. She sat up and her sweet voice rasped with the roughness caused by hours of endless tears. "I think I need a shower." I nodded and walked to the door. I turned to her, and was stricken by how glass like she looked. One shiver, and she would shatter to pieces.

I knew she wouldn't be able to manage the affairs surrounding a funeral for Charlie, I shut the door and went downstairs to speak to Carlisle and Esme.

It was agreed that we'd take on the plans for the service. I sent Jasper and Emmett out to where Charlie's cruiser was. They turned it over several times, banging it up, and then broke the front window, dragging Charlie's vest across it to leave pieces of material on it. Then we called the Forks Police Department to report we'd found his vehicle on our way into town. Carlisle called, in to give the report no one would want to hear. He explained chasing the bear off with his car horn, and asked them to get out quickly before the bear returned – to reinforce the story. Seth assisted us with the story by creating bear-like tracks leaving the area.

Poor Seth, Bella was never going to forgive them, and he couldn't directly disobey Sam regardless. But I could hear that the things Sam had spoken of to Bella were hurting his conscious. I tried to tell him, that I at least didn't blame him, but he was much too intent on blaming himself.

We were all talking about our options. I wanted to get Bella out of Forks, and figured tensions between my family and the pack would have reached a point where we would need to leave again. We agreed to arrange for Charlie's house to remain in Bella's name, though I'd wait until much later to inform her of that. Esme suggested Denali, and everyone seemed happy with that decision. We spoke for ages of all the different ideas and plans until Bella came downstairs.

I went to her, hoping she wouldn't shy from me. She didn't, as always, one of the greatest wonders about her was how she needed me. She was a part of my existence now, one I could never live without. I didn't like the ramifications of what that meant, but I knew I'd have to face them finally, and soon.