Chapter VII - Rage

We were in our meadow again. He was lying next to me, propped up on one elbow. Edward suddenly got a brazen look of determination on his face. He held my eyes for a moment, as though gauging something, then nodded his head once, as though making a decision.

"Bella, I don't want to talk about this in detail now, but I've decided, once we've made it through this next trial," he stepped cautiously around the word which would bring back my crushing pain. "I think it's time."

I looked at him, confused. He continued looking in my eyes for a moment longer, then a certain sort of sadness came into them and he looked away. I understood suddenly what he meant.

I sat straight up to look him in the eye, making him chuckle. "Do you mean you'll change me?" Hope enlivened me for a moment.

Edward smiled, still a little sadly and nodded, "Yes Bella. I'm afraid I can't put you off anymore, and I don't really want to. You're alone in Forks now, we'll likely be leaving soon, and Renee is busy with Phil. I really can't see any obstacle other than my own selfish wish of keeping you human to hinder that plan now. After what you've had to go through, I think you've proven that you're willing to stand by us, whatever happens. You've accepted me as your husband, it's time for me to take care of my side of the bargain too."

I almost laughed, "I'm not sure you got a bargain, Edward. I think I came at a high price."

"If a high price was paid, Bella, I'm quite sure it was your own," he caressed my face, "Poor Bella, so much sadness in so young a life. Yes Bella, I will change you, as soon as we leave Forks."

Esme, Alice and Carlisle made all the arrangements for the service. They sent out invitations to everyone in Forks, and had a late evening service. The actual day of the service was conveniently somber; drizzly, overcast with deep, dark clouds. I stood in a sea of black clothing and white faces.

Chief Swan's death had shocked all of Forks. The official story was that his truck had overturned on one of the roads outside of town when he'd tried to avoid hitting a wild bear. He was then fatally attacked by the bear, after the crash.

I held on to Edward like he was my life preserver in a stormy sea. Both people I knew, and even those I didn't, kept looking sympathetically at me. Every moment I spent standing over my Dad's casket made me a little more relieved that we would be leaving Forks soon.

I didn't realize the service was completed until I noticed through bleary eyes that the casket was being lowered. I turned to Edward and gave in to a fresh wave of sorrow.

I heard the sounds of people passing. They all seemed to need to touch me, a hand on my shoulder, fingers on my arm, while they whispered their condolences. I only wanted them to go away and leave me with my family, who were all there for me, even Rosalie.

After a short time, I realized the procession had ended. Edward was still holding me and caressing my back when he suddenly tensed. I heard Alice hiss, Emmett snickered in a very unpleasant way and Jasper snarled softly. I turned to see what had drawn everyone's attention.

When I looked up, rage took the place of all my anguish. Sam Uley was walking up with the rest of the pack. Sam, Embry and Paul were in front, and everyone else kept a few paces behind. I was stunned when I realized that just behind Sam, was Jacob.

"How can you show your face?! I never gave you permission to be here. He's HERE, right here! Because of you!" I pointed into the grave and hurled the words at them. Edward was holding me tightly around the waist, and I was struggling against him. I grasped at Edward's hands, "Let me go!" I growled as I Looked back at Sam again, "How dare you! How could you? Get out of here, you, you, you dogs! Get out!"

Jacob stepped forward with his hand held out. "Bells?" Edward snarled loudly, but I didn't need the help, I was in a towering fury. "STAY BACK JACOB! I never want any of you, not one of your pack to come near me again. Do you understand me, Jacob Black? Not you, not Sam, none of you! You murdered my Father! You! I may have been responsible for the danger he was exposed to, but you killed him!!!" My voice reached an octave I didn't even know I was capable of.

Angry tears were gushing down my face, I was unable to contain my anger it was so strong. I couldn't pull at Edward's arms because of the flowers in my hand. I looked at them stupidly, and stopped fighting.

Edward's arms slackened long enough for me to step forward. I threw the bouquet into Sam's shocked face. "I hate you Sam Uley, I will hate you forever. You broke the treaty. You took everything I loved away. You begrudged me my love for Edward, you took my best friend Jacob away and turned him into a hard, cruel animal like you, and then you killed my Dad! Charlie thought the world of you. You-," and suddenly I couldn't think of anything worse to say. I clamped my teeth closed and through my clenched teeth I said as quietly as I could. "Leave! Leave now, damn you!"

I could feel the 7 pairs of eyes staring at me from behind, and could see the rest of the shock-widened eyes before me. Sam stepped back, slowly turned, and began walking away. Jacob looked at me with anguished, tear-filled eyes, his lower lip trembling, and walked away as well.

I turned back to Edward. I was hyperventilating again, and as I took a step forward, I noticed detachedly that everything was swimming around me, then it all went black.

I awoke in Carlisle's Mercedes. Poor Edward had me on his lap again. We drove for a little while and then stopped. We were in front of my house…Charlie's house. I looked at Edward, "What are we doing here?"

Carlisle answered instead of Edward, "Bella, I can still stop this if you'd like, but Esme and I thought it would be best if we cleared out Charlie's house and donated it all. Edward and Esme can go in with you so you can get anything you might want."

I looked at him, then at Esme who was looking at me so tenderly. "Okay, you're right. That's probably the best way to handle it." I stepped out of the car, and walked to the front door. Edward retrieved the key from under the eaves and unlocked the door for me, holding it open. I turned on the hall light as I went in, and then walked into the kitchen.

I stood looking around at everything, and couldn't get my mind to work. What should I keep, was there anything I should keep? I walked into the living room and saw the TV, the couch, and the armchair he sat in for all those hundreds of games. It was all Charlie's; I didn't want any of it. It would hurt too much to keep.

I headed upstairs, stopping in front of my room, and found nothing. I'd already cleared it out before the wedding. Nothing was left but my rustic computer, and an empty bed. I walked into Charlie's room and looked around. This was all Charlie's as well. Nothing here was significant. Then I looked at the wall and something caught my eye.

There was a very nice frame, too nice for Charlie to have chosen, holding a photo of Charlie and I. It was the photo I had taken so long ago, just before Edward had left me, in the living room. I thought Renee must have blown it up and sent it to Charlie as a gift. I took it down and turned back to Edward. "This is all I want."

He looked at me concerned, "Are you sure Bella? Just that, and nothing else?"

I looked again at the photo, I couldn't keep my eyes off it. "Yes." I whispered.

He stepped forward and hugged me tight. Then he put his hand on my back and led me back downstairs. He spoke to Esme, who had waited downstairs, in their impossibly fast way, and she nodded and fell in step behind us.

We got into the car, and I turned around to look back at the house. I probably wouldn't ever see it again. It looked sad somehow, as though it missed Charlie as much as I did. Tears escaped down my cheeks, and I said, "Goodbye Charlie."