I NEED A BETA!

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Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the authors. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter One

After staring at it a while, I got off my couch and grabbed the Journal that I recently bought, with the pen in my hand, I began to write.

September 13

Dear Journal,

For the obvious reason, I'm calling you a journal. I lost my last Diary, and I fear the name is cursed. I guess I should recap on the past 2 years of my life being a vampire. I did indeed go threw the change and let me tell you it was extremely painful. When it was happening I felt my bones re-arranging in my body, become steel plates all around making my scream even harder as the bones would just run threw the blood / venom stream that was to small. Next the burning went all over my body, It was burning the unnecessary of my organs, those that I didn't need. Making me scream out, as It felt like getting stabbed and cut open. It was like an operation, without being asleep. I yelled out, while the skin would open and particle would be put into it all over. It was horrible, it was painful, but I didn't regret that.

After that, I stayed with the Cullens' for about 2 months. In that time, I figured out my 'special abilities' I am immune to vampires special powers, and I wasn't attracted to human blood, which made me the first to be immune to it. After that I decided it was time to leave them and go out and figured out my own life from now on. I ruined a family, and yet they still cared. I decided that they all were to kind and yet I left them go.

I wrote them a short note before I left and told them how grateful I was for each of them. I then wrote Edward, Emmett, and Alice personal notes.

So within the few years I have been hopping around, I've been to Antarctica, Russia, and various places in Europe.

I also work for a small store in Canada, which I get paid enough to pay rent in a small apartment. It isn't fancy but it was nice. I do get to save a lot of my money anyhow. Since, I don't eat more then half of my paycheck goes into my savings account. As for my job, I make about the equivalent to thirteen American dollars and hour, and work 10 hours a day, 6 days a week. Which works out for a little over 3 thousand dollars a month with only a hundred dollar water and electricity, and a rent of 800. So I am doing well to say the least.

As for my emotional state, I'm numb. I left because I do love Emmett and it seemed that he was falling for Rosalie again. He explained to me a million times that they were just friends, but who would want me when there's the gorgeous one in front of their eyes. I knew it would absolutely kill me if Emmett to left from my heart, so that's one reason I decided to leave.

Another reason was Edward, yes, I did still love him. I just couldn't forget him, but he was so persistent in asking for forgiveness, especially with the flowers, and pouts. I almost accepted it, but I got over myself. I didn't want to forgive him, not yet at least. I wanted him to suffer in some way, even though it sounds cruel. So before my subconscious got a hold for me, I left.

I guess now, I do miss them all. I miss having Esme around and the brilliant Carlisle, who knows how to get out of any situation. I miss Alice being around always wanting me to be the Barbie doll. I just miss the family that I wish I could be apart of.

I glanced at the clock that was right beside me, it read quarter till 5 in the morning. My job started at 7. I still had a good hour to write.

I guess I shouldn't be complaining over things that I will never have it's pointless, though I hope sometime that I will be able to see them again. With everyone happy and in love with their life. I guess that's what I'll wish for. As for myself, I'm not sure what will become of me. After all, I am nothing special.

I sketched a small heart on the side of the journal, while I figured what else to write.

I wonder if anyone in the Cullens' came around to find my old diary, and I hope to god that no one read it. That sure would be embarrassing.

I guess I'm just worried that if I do meet them again, what they'll think of me. I don't want them to hate me, and I want them to remember who I am, but I don't want them to remember what I caused to their family. I don't want Rosalie to hate me. I don't want them to remember me as the family destroyer.

I glanced at the clock, and realized that a little over an hour passed and I should start getting ready for work.

Until then,

Isabella

I grabbed my work uniform, and got a quick shower washing my hair with a coconut smell, and drove to work soon after.

A young man walked over to the counter – with a few items he wished to purchase. Some of which included gum, a Pepsi, a hot dog, and the new quad magazine. I rang up the items, to get the total of $4.73

I looked up from the cash register to get the guy's cash, when I realized he was staring at me.

"Bella, is that you?" The young man in his twenties asked.

Memories flooded me back, and I realized I was talking to Jacob Black.