Roronoa Zoro was having a very, very bad day. One, to say the least, that was worthy of making the top twenty on his personal list. He remembered only a few of them, but this was definitely up there. After all, it had been a day filled with something he absolutely hated; questions he didn't know the answer to. How was he supposed to know? What great being decided he should have been able to deduce that waking up early that morning would have been a bad thing? How was HE predestined to realize that Ussop had been on watch 48 hours straight? Should he have been aware that the ship's repairs would be affected by this? Was Luffy honestly that hungry? Did Robin know she made an annoying throaty sound when she finished a chapter? Okay, maybe the last one had no impact whatsoever on the situation at hand. He was drowning whether or not the historian purred when she finished a section of her book. It mattered to him, though. It was part of the problem in his mind.

Bubbles flew out the swordsman's mouth. He needed air, but the currents were stifling him. Breathing, he realized then, was something he had taken very much for granted. Everyone did it, but until they couldn't, they really didn't notice what a luxury it was. Perhaps fish did, and that was why they attacked Merry at regular intervals. Fish, of course, made him realize that his lungs weren't his only internal organ needing attention. A low, rumbling sound through the water confirmed that he was hungry, as well.

Flailing, thrashing, and attempting to swim upwards, Zoro could only do one thing. Namely, he cursed the world and went unconscious.

Now, the planet, land, or even the Grand Line didn't tend to notice when it had an ambitious sailor in its turbulent grasp, but usually someone else did. Often this wasn't a thing to be thankful for, because the person who knew their comrade had fallen overboard was often the one that pushed him. For example, if the ero-cook had been the one to push the green-haired warrior off the boat, there probably would have been no call for backup whatsoever. A smirk maybe, or a passing glance and nod at another crewmember, but never a full-blown cry of 'man overboard'. That was strictly for emergencies that happened as the result of an enemy's assault or a freak accident. So, predictably, almost any captain was afraid of the phrase.

The great Straw-Hat Luffy was no exception.

Monkey D. Luffy was not immune to words. Any of his nakama would probably be able to inform someone ignorant of this fact by uttering something about a meat shortage. The temper tantrum that would follow tended to leave the pupil in a state of trauma, but the knowledge would be shared. It was a childish fear of the boy-captain; one of those that were conducive of hiding in a corner. The fear of the phrase that Nami was about to yell, to the contrary, was more of a mortal terror. The kind that makes even the strongest hearts stop.

"MAN OVERBOARD!" the navigator shrieked, still frantically searching the surface for any sign of her missing nakama.

The effect was instantaneous. The sounds of the crew commenced; a book shutting, a strangled cry from the crow's nest, a childish scream, a splash, and the sound of plates being dropped. Nami didn't peel her eyes away from the sea, but she heard their footsteps behind her.

"Nami-san!" came Sanji's voice. It still held that annoying adoration, but it was too serious to be a call for dinner.

"Nami! What happened?" Ussop shouted from the crow's nest. He had been jerked out of his doze by her alert. Whatever was going on was partially his fault, and that didn't weigh well on the sniper's conscience.

"Who fell?!" Chopper pleaded to know. His eyes were probably wide. They tended to be when danger approached.

The heat beating down on her face, Nami didn't really want to have to explain what was happening. She had hoped her remaining nakama would be able to put two and two together. Obviously, she was disappointed in this respect. Time was of the essence, though, so she merely said one word. "Zoro."

Chopper's eyes had been wide before, but they now were open to the point that his eyelids might rip. Similarly, Ussop fell from the crow's nest onto his rear end.

Sanji lit a cigarette and cocked his head.

Robin didn't do anything at all.

Nami felt her jaw fall. Zoro was out there, probably drowning, and her nakama just slowly gain their bearings? Did no one care? Not even Lu-

It then dawned on all of them at once.

The question was in all of their heads, but Sanji was the one who broke the silence, his eyebrow furrowing. "Oi. Where'd the shitty captain go?"