Harry, Ron, and Hermione, sat in the Great Hall, which was now called The Not so Great Hall, and listened to Dumbledore's welcoming speech.
"Well! That certainly was an interesting flight! It's to bad Hagrid isn't here with the First Years...he can't steer that aviator plane too well," Dumbledore said, "Well, anyway, welcome back! Here are some things I would encourage you to do this year:
Be BFFs with Snapette, go in the Forbidden and look for Fang, say Voldy's name, discover our secrets, go into a secret chamber, discover the air of Slytherings, find out your godfather is a crazy murder named after a constellation and can turn into a dog, almost get bitten by a werewolf, enter a contest when your underage, battle Voldy and win, be angsty, fight Dream Stealers at the Ministry of Magic concert, find an old book written by Snapette, kiss your best friend's sibling, have your mentor die, go on a search for pieces of Voldy's soul, and defeat Voldy. Have fun!" Dumbledore said, "Ah, Hagrid, now we can start the sorting ceremony!"
"Agrap, Lyndon!" McGonagall called out.
He sat on the stool, and the sorting hat called out, "Mifflindor!"
He happily skipped over to where Harry, Ron, and Hermione were sitting.
"Aren't we in Gryffindor?" Harry asked.
"No silly, the houses are Mifflindor, Dogclaw, Dustypuff, and Slytherings!" Hermione said.
"...If you say so," Harry said.
Harry looked around him. He saw that the houses had different house colors than normal.
But then again, this isn't normal.
Hufflepuff, now Dustypuff, had house colors that were ugly brown and a dust gray. In the center of their banner was a vacuum cleaner.
Ravenclaw, now Dogclaw, had house colors that were black and brown. In the center of their banner was a poodle.
Slytherin, now Slytherings, had house colors that were barf green and red. In the center of their banner was a Christmas tree with a snake wrapped around it.
Gryffindor, now Mifflindor, had house colors that were blue and orange. In the center of their banner was a person with their ear pressed to the side of a door.
Harry was now unsure if this was a dream or reality.
That review button is getting lonely...