A/N: A short story based on one of the marauder's proudest moments. Happy chapter 50.
Pranks: The one hobby to rule them all.
They had planned it all out, just the way they always did. Neither James nor Sirius had an idea what the aftermath's would look like, they were too focused on how funny it would all be, how much it would inflate their feelings of superiority. Peter was acting as the lookout, as usual, while the whole thing was being set up. Remus had ensured, though a month of planning and research, that the whole plan wouldn't go to waste because of Filch, or anyone else. We knew exactly how people would move while we were setting everything up, even without using the marauder's map.
That left James and Sirius. Armed to the teeth with every kind of prank item available to them, as well as a few they made for the occasion, were the prime marauders in the plan. There was no corner of the Great hall that would be safe. Everything was perfect and was timed to go off at the appropriate moment.
It didn't go off at breakfast, as you would have expected. Students were either rushing too much during the first meal of the day, or their arrival rates were dispersed.
It didn't go off at lunch, either. That would disrupt classes for the rest of the day, something that would likely get the marauders in a bit too much hot water.
It went off during the evening feast and it was marvellous.
Strings of underwear magically floated around the Great Hall as a replacement for the customary candles. The ceiling had been enchanted to flash in correspondence to the owners of the underwear. Insults towards the owners also appeared.
"Snivellus is a large nosed git with bat like ears?" One of the girls read an insult out loud before bursting into peals of laughter. The next moment she was shrieking because a pair of her underwear floated over of her head with her name flashing on the ceiling in bold letters.
The next moment, a pair of Snivellus' enlarged shorts made an appearance in the centre of the hall. They were honestly large enough to fit ten or so people in. Neon letters appeared over the crotch area, reading "wash me." Catcalls erupted in Severus' general direction, which the slimy boy shot down with a series of stoney looks.
The prank didn't stop there. The chaos in the Great Hall was not nearly enough. The more enthusiastic professors scrambled to take down the underwear. Dumbledore didn't seem to mind the change of decoration, though. He was smiling peacefully enough in the marauders' direction. That only enthused them to allow the plan to continue.
The next phase was slime. Buckets and buckets of the stuff: green, red, yellow, brown. It covered the walls, the tables, the door and the floor, making movement literally impossible for everyone. Everyone and anyone who moved got covered in it. Flowing in the middle of it all was Severus' pair of enlarged boxers. Goo seeped out of it as if it was being wrung. The slime waterfall was Sirius' brilliant idea.
James couldn't help himself. They had just proved that Snivellus was the slimiest git in Hogwarts. Unfortunately, the slime didn't smell. It was odourless, and that would just not do.
Several dungbombs erupted behind the instructors' table, seeping brown gas into the hall like nothing the boys had ever witnessed before. James had invented a new kind of bomb, just for the occasion. He had dubbed the "Marauder Fartbombs". James' bombs performed splendidly when they went off, creating a fart-like noise as well as practically opaque, stinky green mist. James had insisted that these bombs go off under the students tables, and so they did. A few small fireworks erupted as well, just for good measure. Other kinds of joke products went off, much to the dismay of the Slytherins.
Within minutes, both the students and the instructors were scrambling toward the door, which Remus had placed a locking charm on. The slime made it hard on all of them. Every few steps, there would be a mass of people falling and sliding around. It was the funniest thing the marauders had ever seen. They were laughing hard for what seemed like an hour. When Sirius finished, he poked James and pointed to Peter's tear stricken face.
"Don't wet yourself, Wormtail, it's not that funny," Sirius barked, immediately snapping back to laughing at their gag. Peter stopped laughing long enough to blush. Remus looked like he was going to die from laughing so hard.
"Augh! Snivellus just fell, face first, into a pile of slime!" James roared over top of the screams of the other students. This merely caused his friends to laugh harder.
Dumbledore seemed to enjoy himself, as well, but when the headmaster had enough he decided to end it. He pulled out his wand and cleared all of the slime, bombs and other items away. Order was restored in the hall. Instantly, the headmaster turned his crystal blue eyes on the marauders and mouthed the words they had dreaded.
"Detention. Three months."
Sirius overcame his grief quickly by proclaiming that the whole thing was "worth it and James couldn't agree with him more.