Malfunction
Takes place the night before Cameron breaks Sarah out of prison.
I allow a quiet pitter patter as I walk barefoot across the motel room floor, fearing that John may become angry were I to surprise him.
It does not matter. He is angry anyway. He shouts at me, "Stop staring at me like that!"
I divert my gaze. "I am sorry for your loss."
He glares at me, though I see something else in his eyes that I do not recognize. I see it every time I talk to him. It isn't anger, or hate, but he has not shown me enough of this emotion for me to identify it.
"Why are you sorry?" he challenges.
I can not admit to him that I am not. I can not admit to him why I am not. I did not know Charley, and he was a security risk. I knew Derek, but he was cruel, and a bad influence on John. Had he been able to infect John with his bigotry, more machines would have gone bad in the future... and one may have been pushed too far in the present.
"Derek was one of your best men. He was a valuable resource-" John begins leaving the room, but I do not attempt to stop him, "-possessing vast amounts of combat experience, tactical knowledge, and strong leadership skills. These could have aided you in becoming who you need to be."
He enters the bathroom, slamming the door as I try to follow. Data given to me by Skynet tells me of ways to manipulate him, but it is wrong. It is what I did when I went bad, and when I tried to separate him from Riley.
I refuse to do that to him again.
"I am sorry, John." For reasons I can not explain, I find myself leaning my forehead against the door.
My voice becomes a whisper, though it is unintentional, "I don't know what to say..." An unknown sound escapes my lips, and my vision blurs.
I seem to be malfunctioning.
John will burn me if he finds out, and I am needed.
I retreat quickly into the darkness.