Disclaimer-I Own neither Naruto or Bleach
"...No way, no way...no...freakin...way..." Kenpachi repeated as he began testing his new (and downgraded) puny little body. He started by striping and removing himself of the hideous jumpsuit. This caused the pink hair banshee and the loud blond slut to shriek in outrage. However Ino stopped a bit early when her cheeks tinted pink as she took notice of Naruto's tone and developing body.
'W-wow, I never knew Naruto has THAT under all of those eyesore clothing...'
"NARUTO BAKA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Screamed Sakura but kept her distance as she vaguely remember her injured hand do to Naruto resistance against her. She felt better as she began putting him down after he nearly bent her confidence of abusing the blond demon vessel.
She opened her mouth to say the same thing she always do when she gets around the blond "dobe" but what she didn't expect was a medium small tan hand slapped itself to her cheeks, covering her mouth completely.
"Listen you tiny little bitch and listen real good..." Growling as tightened his and if you don't..." He tightened his grip causing Sakura to panic and twitch her body in pain. "...I don't know where I am but if you keep bothering me I'LL CRUSH YOUR HEAD!" and with that he easily shove her to the ground.
She slammed the ground hard and her lack of ass wasn't enough to cushion the impact. Feeling the impact on her bum she looked up and started forming what seems to be an limitless amount of tears.
"WA...uh...waaah...hic...wuuh..." She started, everybody started to back away. "WAAAAAHH!!" She shrieked as she held two fingers below her crying eyes. Kenpachi, not wanting to stay any longer with the pink haired crybaby he started to sprint to a place where he can avoid these cockroaches and get some answers but not before shredding up his ridiculous orange garbage with his bare hands and throwing it away like trash.
--Flashback 30 minutes later--
The ex-shinigami started to slow down while still trying to get used to this new and body. On his body were two deep bloody gashes caused by some blade, however he paid no attention to his bleeding wounds. As he continue walking back the place he woke up in this body, Kenpachi was feeling a familiar feeling of frustration when he wished he killed those masked ninja who tried to take this "scroll" from him a few while ago.
--FLASHBACK 26 minutes later--
"Hey...is there anything but forest in here!?" He yelled out loud and irritation as he jumped to branch to branch, for the thousand times in his life he cursed his little to no amount sense of direction...
It wasn't long as his thoughts on his old comrades and Lieutenant came to his mind as if trying to guide him to the right direction.
As expected it was no surprise that would Yachiru came to his mind first.
--Yachiru thoughts pov--
"Use you intuition Ken-chan!" Yachiru smiled cutely, her hands waving cheerly at him.
'I'm doing that already!' He growled at her.
Second came Ikkaku his 3rd Seat of 11th division.
--Ikkaku thoughts pov--
"The mind's eye thing!" Exclaimed the bald shinigami, his head sparkling as he spoke. "Then just use that! Duh!"
"If i could use that I wouldn't be thinking this, idiot!" Kenpachi snapped at him.
Then the last was Yumichika Ayasegawa much to Kenpachi's displeasure.
--Yumichika thoughts pov--
"If it was me in the middle of a forest...lost and lonely..." Said the narcissist shinigami of the 5th seat. "...I would probably call for help...in a beautiful way..." He finished with a exotic tone and posture.
'Go to hell.' Kenpachi thought, clearly deadpanned at his 5th seat officer's antics. As much as he hate to admit it but he miss those idiots especially the brat always clinging behind his back like a furless koala.
--END OF KENPACHI'S THOUGHTS--
As he started to brood he almost missed three unfamiliar presence in the air. Kenpachi stopped his sulking and grinned to what some people considered as a psychopath expression.
"Come out! Its shameless to sneak around like that boys! why don't you come here...?"
Meanwhile as Kenpachi disguised as Uzumaki Naruto was egging them on, three Ame (rain) genin were sweating as they miscalculated their plan to ambush the next fool who foolishly walk to their boundaries of the Forest Of Death.
"What should we do Oboro? I mean he look at him! orange pants that can be spotted for miles he even walked here like a loser! C'mon he doesn't even look like a match to me!" One of the rain genin Mubi suggested as he look at his team leader.
Mizu stared at "Naruto" for a moment.
'He's right, I'm mean come on, orange pants, only a black shirt with evidence there's no hidden weapons outlined. A headband to protect his forehead...Pft! like thats gonna help when we are gonna jump on him...Yeah...WE CAN TAKE THIS GUY AND USE HIM AS HOSTAGE FOR HIS TEAMATES!' The mist ninja thought wildly at this opportunity.
"Alright guys, lets move it!" Oboro jumped from the hiding place to face Kenpachi who they think was "the leaf trash" and his two goons of a teammates followed suit. "Alright leaf boy! If you don't want to get hurt then bow to us and stay that way until we get your scroll!" The rain genin smirked as his comrades snickered. But that stopped when he noticed the grin on Kenpachi's face never left when they revealed themselves.
"Really? Tell me something about this 'scroll' and also..." Kenpachi's face turned serious for a moment. "...Where am I?"
Oboro blinked twice before looking at his two teammates and then the three Kiri genin began laughing their guts out. (I don't know their names except Mizu, so sorry!)
"Hahaha hear that guys!? Blondy doesn't even remember why he's here!"
"I bet the only reason he's here is because his teammates dragged him here!"
"I knew this kid was a jackass the second I saw him HAHA!"
"Grr...I can't take more of this..." Thought Kenpachi with an angry tick mark on his temple, he looked at the fists that belongs to his new body. "...Oh well...even if I don't have my zanbaktou..." He grinned sadistically
"Hey queers!" Catching their attention. "I usually don't submit...then again I never do and since you want to take me hostage..." Kenpachi revealed a bloodthirsty grin.
"...You just have to fight me first!" He said as he began taking off his (Naruto's) black shirt) and throwing it to the side. "...And as a bonus I'll even give you a free shot at me! C'MON! WHAT DO YA SAY HUH!?" He sneered excitingly.
The trio Amegakure genin stood in silent shock as they listened to what they now dubbed a "crazy" Konoha genin. They couldn't believe what they just heard. A free shot!? Is this kid for real!? What kind of shinobi lets themselves to be attacked unprotected and unguarded?
But here he was in front of them with his body available and free to take any kind of punishment that is gonna be thrown at him.
'Is he bluffing?' Mizu thought silently. '...Maybe is he really strong and this is just to let our guards down or ...!' He narrowed his eyes which carefully looked around the forest. He slipped his hand to his back and reached out for a kunai. "...O-o-or maybe he isn't..." He paused as his doubt began to increase. But the scroll! What about the earth scroll!!
"HEY! WELL!? AREN'T YOU GONNA GO!? MY PAITENCE IS WANNING!" Kenpachi taunted using Naruto's voice box, to the others it sounded like a goofy looking 12 year old with a demonic voice calling them. Taunting them. Like fly that'll soon be captured in a spider web.
"No, this is a bluff! it has to be!" With a cry he charged at the vulnerable blond, kunai in his hand, he ignoring the pleas of protest behind him as he crept closer and closer to this... infuriating Konoha trash.
To his horror...the grin on his face never left as he slashes his chest open.
'O-okay...' He stared at his bloody kunai and to the grinning blond despite the bloody gash on his chest and then gazed back to his bloody kunai again. '...I guess he wasn't bluffing after all...' Oboro then yelped when Kenpachi yanked the the kunai from his hands.
Kenpachi's creepy grin grew even wider when he saw fear in their eyes (or body movement since one of them has both eyes covered by a cloth.)
"No, no no...If you really want to cut someone up..." The three gapped in utter horror as Kenpachi plunged the kunai deep into his chest, then they nearly passed out as he dragged the blade resulting another major blade wound except this seems more critical. "...You have to do without hesitation now try again!" Ripping the knife from his chest and throwing it back to the terrified genins who never seen such a terrifying performance could exist despite coming from one of the most war thirsty country/village in existence
"Well? If your not gonna attack me then at least tell me where am I boys."
"..." No response
"..." Kenpachi.
"..." Rain genins.
"..." Kenpachi.
"..." Rain genins again.
"...sigh...fine, at least give me clue or this 'scroll' something..." Kenpachi suggested, whats the fun if they don't even fight back!? Oh well...maybe he can get some information about this "scroll" they were so wanting about.
At the end of moment he said those words the one with his eyes completely covered immedently reached through his pockets and pulled out a small decorated scroll.
"Here!" He tossed the scroll to Kenpachi who caught it easily. "...The heaven scroll! Now take it and leave!" And with that he took hold to his two teammates and ran as fast as he could, away from this...insane monster.
Kenpachi just blinked, still clueless of his situation and the location he is stuck now. Shrugging, he decided to solves this case and fight another time until he finds a clue. Taking the "heaven scroll" and placing it in his disgusting orange pockets and went back.
--Flashback end--
'Is that blood I smell?' Thought Kenpachi as he accidentally took a whiff of the air. It was blood...and wasn't far.
"Blood...blood means battle!" He grinned as he sped up.
--
"Sasuke-kun are you alright?" Asked a very worried Sakura as Sasuke panted harshly, he rubbed the back of his left shoulder and try to massage the pain away but that mark left by that freak what did Sakura said his name was? Orochibu? Orichimaru? Whoever he was, it gave him a very unpleasant gift especially if it was the one of his neck.
He tensed when he heard footsteps, he pushed Sakura down and used his hand to muffle her gleeful yell of "Sasuke-kun touched me!"
To his surprise, shock and annoyance it was Naruto.
Surprise because from what Sakura said, Naruto chicken out because he was a coward and want out. Shock when he saw he was shirtless and two bloody gashes were clearly visible on his chest. But it doesn't even seem to affect the dobe. And last was annoyance because Naruto...was just Naruto...
Shaking his head and the pain from his shoulder.
"Oy dobe, where've you been? Sakura told me you chickened out..."
"Dobe" just stared at Sasuke as if he never seen him before.
--Kenpachi's pov--
Right in front of him was a boy his body's age.
The boy had an air of arrogance and smugness, he can tell that. He wore khaki tan shorts that was two inches above his knees and his shins were worn with fabric leg warmers with buckles. He had a blue shirt with a high collar that covers his chin. Also his face was arrogant and broody like his presence and with a hairstyle of a duck ass, Last was a headband with some kind leaf symbol and a fan symbol sewed on the back of his shirt.
'Whoa...look at him, his body language screams "Emo", his face reminds me of an arrogant jerk but I can't remember who, and whats up with that duck ass hair style!?' Thought Kenpachi as he took mental notes on this boy.
--Normal pov--
"NARUTO-BAKA!!" Shrieked a familiar loud voice, a voice that Kenpachi hope it was the last thing he'll never hear.
"Oh...not you again!" He scrunched his nose in annoyance as he layed eyes on the pick hair girl he met earlier. "Tell me...why do I have to meet you again forehead slut?"
"W-WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME!?"
Kenpachi was about to repeat himself before a boy in his late teens interrupted. He had silver hair tied to a ponytail, a familiar headband with the leaf symbol and glasses that sorta reminds him of that Ishida Qunicy boy. (I'm too lazy with details and suck at details and also you know who this person is so you don't really need an description unless its a hint)
"Ah...you must be this Naruto I been hearing about! Names Kabuto Yakushi, I've been teaming up with your teammates because I can't find mine and you know..." He looked sheepish. "...We Konoha people must stick together!" He grinned with an air of friendly yet a suspicious gleam in his eyes.
'This boy...I don't like him already...'
"Sasuke-kun! bad news!" Yelled out Sakura, Kenpachi's now cerulean eyes followed to a heap up bodies and "pinky" was digging through their pockets, pouches and parts makes him realize this girl's a slut.
Kenpachi recognized the unconscious bodies. Each has those suits, masks and a headband with rain or water symbol engraved.
'These are the ones who ran away from me! cowards!'
"What?" Yelled back 'Sasuke-kun' Kenpachi noted his name.
"There's no scroll!" She choked in despair as she held her hands in front of her symbolizing there's nothing of their concentrated value. "Not even an earth scroll so we can trade!" (I doubt they'll simply just trade the earth scroll for a heaven like that Sakura TT)
Sasuke looked livid and then slammed his fist to the nearest tree. "It can be!"
'Scroll...' Thought Kenpachi as he took the heaven scroll from his pocket.
"You mean with 'this' "heaven scroll""? He held the scroll between both his index and middle finger.
Sasuke, Sakura, and the silver hair, four eyes, just looked at him with their mouths open.
Since they know whats this 'scroll' thing is I'll just play along the way and maybe...'
Kenpachi mentally grinned.
'...There might be a fight that'll continue to grow to something worthy!'.
--THREE DAYS LATER--
Sasuke Sakura and Kenpachi are now walking to the tower to pass the second Chunin exam. It has been a strange and rather boring few days for the Uchiha and his number one fangirl. Normally their blond knuckheaded teammate would be hyper like he ate a bag of sugar and be all over everyone with his annoying voice and pranks. But the last three days "Naruto" has been nothing but silent and mild mannered only to talked to them about breakfast, lunch and dinner which was bizarre that he didn't even jump to be the cook or scream "I'll cook!"
The few days went on smoothly as well. The only trouble were the first and second day. First were the Mist nin, Then a freak named "Orochimaru" and the next day seemed to be his pawns/servants, the three Oto genin and beat the crap out of Sakura (Kenpachi almost showed a glad smile when he heard this.) Only to retreat from a rampaging curse seal Sasuke. And the day after that the same Mist ninja who tried to ambush Kenpachi earlier tried to ambush them for a earth scroll.
The only reason Sasuke and Sakura beat those punks was behind Kabuto seemed...different. When the two almost fall in defeat by the black illusion clones. Kabuto suddenly had a change in skill and threw three kunai at the real bodies making the clones vanish.
It seemed hopeless when Sakura found out they lacked a heaven scroll meaning someone has already taken it.
Then out of nowhere Naruto came by with a heaven scroll between his fingers.
And to Kenpachi's annoyance he had to wear the ridiculous orange jacket the "pink haired slut" and the "duck ass" started to question him how he got it.
His answers were always...
"Someone left it on their ground..." But they didn't believe him. Then again it was a lie.
"I ambushed a guy and found a scroll..." Like his first lie except they thought he was "Naruto the dobe" couldn't have beaten a ninja because "Your too pathetic dobe now tell us how you got that scroll." and "Yeah! What Sasuke-kun said!"
His third excuse was "Fuck you now leave me alone duck ass, you too slut." Much to their frustration.
Kenpachi narrowed his eyes at the 4th companion, Yakushi Kabuto.
Something about this guy doesn't...seem right. The day he saw this silver haired teen he already felt a prick of distrust.
"Kabuto!" A voice behind to bush startled them. "There you are!" A large man and another large man with clothing like Kabuto appeared. Their heads is covered by a full hitai-ite head band, one with glasses and one with black rimmed sunglasses and a cloth that cover their faces.
"Ah! ! Sorry, I hit a snag along the way." Kabuto scratched his head awkwardly. "Now that I'm here we should go!"
He turned to Kenpachi and the others.
"Well, I guess this is the where we part ways...good luck guys." And with that Kabuto and the others left.
"Wow! Kabuto is so cool! Not as cool as Sasuke-kun..." She said dreamily. "But I'm glad we had him along the way!"
Sasuke and Kenpachi just narrowed their eyes in suspicion.
--A few minutes later--
"So...how was the harvest...?" Said a silky dark voice. In front of this person was Kabuto, Misumi and Yoroi.
"Yes, it was above expectation" Kabuto stated to the owner of the voice. "I written down all of their his date from the second test." he held one of his Ninja info cards between his fingers.
"You want this, right?"
"So how was it Kabuto?"
"Hehe, so you're that interested...Orochimaru-Sama" He gave the card to the snake sanin.
"I just want your opinion...as our spy..." Orochimaru grinned.
"That's unnecessary..." He place his hand above the cut wound he received from letting himself from the mist genin.
"...since everything will be decided by you." With one finger swipe the cut disappeared from his face.
"Heh...I like that intelligence of your Kabuto...Good work." And with that the Hebi-sanin disappeared with a shunshin.
--A couple minutes later--
"Sooooo...whats this suppose to mean?" Questioned the ex-shinigami as he stared at the message glued on the wall.
Sakura's eyes widened in realization.
"I think...they are telling us to open the scrolls..." She declared as she held the earth scroll and Sasuke with the heaven. Their hands trembled while Kenpachi watched with little interest.
"T-This is...a summoning scroll justsu!" Sasuke said as smoke started to rise from the scroll contents.
"What should we do Sasuke!" Yelled Sakura.
"Let go of it duh!" He and Sakura tossed the two scrolls on the ground. The smoke stared to increase and then dissipate.
As the smoke started to fade, a person was visible behind it.
Sakura was the first one to speak up.
"Iruka sensei!?"
Iruka gazed proudly at them "Long time no see!" He took out a pocket watch and stared at it.
"And you made it just in time too!" He closed the watch and looked at them again.
"The second test...all three of you pass, congratulations." He announced to the stunned genin.
"To celebrate your success..." He smiled with his eyes closed. "I'd like to buy you a round of ramen but..." He paused, expecting a hug or a yell.
But none of that came.
He opened one eye and then another.
'That's weird...usually Naruto would jump around in glee at the word "ramen"...'
"Urm...I said...I like to buy a round of ramen for you guys..." He repeated. "...Well...what cha think Naruto? Another bowl of miso ramen?" Gaining the blonde's attention.
"Naruto" glared at him.
"Do I know you?"
Iruka just stayed silent as Sasuke and Sakura gapped at their teammate.
--
"First off, the second test...Congratulations on passing!" Announced the Sandaime Hokage. They are now stood silent in a large arena, facing a row of older ninja. No one said a word, waiting for the Hokage to speak. There were two railings above them on each side. In front of them stood a pair of fish netted webbed shinobi arms, with hands in a hand-seal. Along with Naruto's team, Kabuto's team, Kiba's team, Ino's team, Lee's team, Oto team and those three sand ninjas had passed. There were some signs of fear,(namely Kiba) nervousness, along with some joy as everyone observed who had passed, and someone in the group was just bored at the situation.
They stood in the middle of the arena, silent as the grave, as they stared down the senior ninjas. They stood in two rows, with examiners in the front, and instructors in the back. In front stood Iruka, Ibiki, the Third Hokage, Anko, and various other ninja that they couldn't recognize. Behind them stood the instructors, and from the applicant's right to left stood a man with glasses and spiky light-brown hair around his head. Next to him was Asuma, wearing his normal shinobi garb with the usual sash and smoking a cigarette. Kakashi stood next to him, as lazy as ever, with Gai to his side. Kurenai stood beside him, and to her right stood a man with a traditional shinobi vest and spiky hair combed back, spiky at the back of his head. Finally, a man with a small amount of face paint and Sand shinobi clothing stood, with medical tape wrapped around his head, and a piece of cloth covering his left eye with a hourglass symbol on his headband.
'This could be fun...' Thought Kenpachi as his new eyes looked around the room, a look of hunger appeared on his face.
'I can feel it...there are many strong presence in this room...' A familiar sick grin that was caught unnoticed by a certain snake mistress.
'I can't wait to cut them all!"