A/N: I've gotten about a page done for my 15 page final, but I just had to finish this, so a Examination of U.S. International Relations is gonna have to wait.
I'm still not sure if there will be a 3rd part to this, but if there is it will be after I finish The Way They Were.
*The awesome reviews for part 1 had me writing part II so fast, just something to keep in mind. :-)
-.-.-.-.-.-
ll I've run out complicated theories,
so now I'm taking back my words.. ll
She was having a really shitty day. She didn't hear her alarm that morning and slept in. She didn't have time to grab her morning coffee and instead of feeling refreshed because she slept so late, she was dragging herself to get going. Then by the time she did get to the office she got chewed out by her boss for being late and then yelled at to not forget the meeting they had later that afternoon.
None of that was too bad though. The worse hit her when she was filing papers and noticed the date on the calendar.
This day was important.
It was an anniversary she really wished she didn't remember, for obvious reasons. A scar on her left calf and the memories of what happened that day, and what was lost, wouldn't let her forget.
She really wishes she could call someone, someone who was there and who understands what this day means.
Of course there is one person she wishes she could call everyday; but that's not happening. She won't let herself call him, today or any day. She won't call him because after that phone call almost six months ago, that conversation pretty much ended everything.
In the beginning it was really easy to be hurt and angry, because the things he said to her (she hopes he really didn't mean it, because she didn't) made it easy to feel like they did need to end things. Because they weren't the same people anymore, and things were different now, and so much had changed.
It wasn't until a month later when she was cleaning her apartment and she found the ticket stubs from that NOFX concert they had gone to that last time he visited that had her finally having a breakdown about what had happened. Because she realized it didn't matter if they weren't the same people anymore. It didn't matter if she lived here and he lived there. None of it mattered. Because she realized she was pretty sure that she would love him anyway he was. (She made a promise to live him forever, remember?)
Even after all the hurtful things he said (she knows part of it was true) she still loves him. And as crazy as it sounds, that kind of the reason she's still in L.A. Because he told her that she was meant for great things. And he told her he would love her forever. That it would always be her.
While if she proved him right with the first part (she was working her ass off to do great things) then maybe he would prove her right with the rest.
So she's still here, and he was still there, and right now that's the way it is. She's just really hoping it won't always be.
Regardless of her logic, as of right now at least, she wouldn't be calling Lucas on this day (even though she hopes he's ok because he's probably the one who lost the most because of that day). And since everything that happened between them, she's sort of been distancing herself-from everyone else.
Well, her and Brooke have been distant for awhile really. Ever since her best friend (can't she still call her that if they haven't talked in almost a year?) moved to New York to take over the fashion world that haven't really been contact. And she knows Brooke's not the only one to blame. She knows the phone works both ways, and she also knows she's been a suck friend for not calling. But she also knows that Brooke might be the one person who knows her better then anyone-expect of course a certain boy. And Peyton knows if she calls Brooke, it wont take long for Brooke to tell her what an idiot she's being about not just trying to work things out with a certain boy.
And its too hard to talk to Haley, because well she's his best friend. And even though Haley never said it, how could she not take his side? And then Nathan's his brother, and even though technically she's known him longer (you gotta love their history, don't you?) and she knows he'll never intentionally be bias, he just cant, not be.
Because Nathan believed just as much as she did, that one day they would be more then friends, one day they would be family too. That one day they would have the same last name, and her first born son would have Nathan as a middle name like Nathan's son had his brother's for his.
But that's not happening anymore.
So instead of having someone to call she pushes it all aside, and pretends it's just a normal day. Well her normal days suck as it is, and later that day when she goes to that meeting with her boss, it only gets worse.
She pays attention enough to hear him say things like it being so tough because of the bad economy, and that the slumping record sales are because everyone buys digital now of days.
Whatever the reason, the label folded.
She's out of a job.
ll I'm preparing for the breakdown ll
He hasn't shown anyone-other then Haley-his new novel. It's been finished for a month and he hasn't even mentioned it to his editor. David's a good guy and all, but Lucas doesn't think he'll understand all the underlining metaphors about love and destiny and loss when its in a story about a boy and a comet.
But its more then that.
He just isn't ready to admit to anyone-other then Haley, who hasn't brought it up since that first day he showed it to her-that this novel, like the last one, is about Peyton and the fact that he still (will always) love her.
Even though he doesn't say it out loud-he still loves her, but the likelihood that she loves him? That's the part he's not so sure about. Because it's been close to six months since they broke up and they haven't even talked to each other.
He's thought about calling her, a lot. (Always).
Especially on certain days. Like on a certain anniversary that he knows she always struggles with (It took everything in him not to just pick up the phone and check in with her). But he knows that after the last time they talked she probably doesn't want to hear from him. Because he'll be the first to admit that what happened was entirely his fault. Because he wasn't patient and understanding. And he said things he really didn't mean and so he went and hurt them both.
Actually he thinks he was a total dick. Expecting her to just give up on all her plans and dreams because he was too insecure that he couldn't be without her? Forcing her to chose when really he hadn't proven to her he should be the only choice. What the hell was he thinking?
So even though he doesn't want to admit that he still loves her to anyone (they all know he does), he knows that it's true. And once he let himself be ok with that fact, things got a little easier. Sort of.
Once he resigned himself to the fact that he loved her (would always love her) it was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders and it's didn't hurt as much anymore.
And after the pain stopped feeling so bad, he started to pretend again. That he was ok without her, and that he fine to be on his own, and just maybe he was happy that things had turned out the way that they did.
Of course he's not ok, or fine, or happy but he fakes it and when everyone starts to believe him he thinks he's chosen the wrong profession. He should have been an actor instead, because sometimes he even has himself believing that he's ok and fine and happy.
ll Your things have lost the smell of you,
and the bathroom's still a mess... ll
She goes home that night and she has no idea what to do. The only reason she was in this damn city was because of that job, and now that it's gone, she doesn't know what to do. It probably wouldn't be too hard to find another position at one of the major labels, but most likely if she did land a spot, she would be starting all over again.
Back in the mailroom. And damn it she just got out of there, and she really doesn't want to go back. And then she thinks back to what he told her the last time they talked. (Doesn't it always come back to his words?)
'Come on Peyton you've worked in the mailroom for the last year. You produced two albums and booked so many bands right here in Tree Hill, is it so wrong of me to think that you could be doing more here?'
He's right. (It seems every time she thinks back to that last call she finds another reason).
She could be doing more back in Tree Hill.
She doesn't have to stay in L.A. to do great things.
And he's there.
So what the hell is she still doing here?
ll Remind me why we decided this was for the best? ll
He starts to split his time between home and New York. And he hates every second of it. Because New York is too big and it's loud and too crowded. But really, his animosity could possibly have something to do with the fact that it reminds him of L.A. too much. And he hates L.A. (Can you blame him?)
But he goes every other week and pretends some more, because big things are happening. His novel is getting published, and what he's learned in the past few months since finding out it's gonna get published is that it's a very long process.
Although he thought that his novel was nearly perfect (how could it not be, he wrote about her..) he's constantly being ask to change and revise things. For the most part it's the same story, apparently it just needed a "little tweaking".
So he splits his time between home and New York, and he argues with his editor about little things that he tells Lucas he's got to change, but Lucas won't budge on.
Like apparently, the Peyton Sawyer in the book is a little too tragic. (If his editor only knew what happened after the book ends).
While Lucas fights back and says that's what really happened. All of it. And in case David hasn't gotten it, the Lucas in the book always, always saved Peyton and she saved him right back. That's why it's always him and her. That why the novel has the happy ending.
He really wishes he can say the same thing about the real Lucas, though. Because he didn't save her this last time, he pushed her away. And now both of them are lost.
Eventually his editor concedes and they move on to other topics, but he says that the Lucas in the book must of really loved that girl if he really did all those things.
Lucas just nods his head in recognition. If David only knew.
ll Because I miss you love,
I miss you love.. ll
She knows that going home is insane, they haven't even talked to each other in six months, but all she keeps thinking about was their last conversation and the last words he spoke to her. (It always comes back to his words, doesn't it?)
I guess we finally got what we always wanted.
That-those words-have been bothering her for six months. Because she never got to tell him, that all she's ever wanted, since the beginning-before L.A. and broken promises and mistakes and broken hearts-all she has ever wanted is him.
So she packs up her apartment-that really wasn't much to pack (maybe she's always known that L.A. was only temporary) and then she has everything sent ahead to her Dad' place back in Tree Hill.
She knows he won't mind, he's out on a job and really she doesn't expect to keep her things there for that long anyways. She'll figure it all out when she gets there. And yeah there's a lot to figure, like finding a job and a place to live, but none of that matters right now, because she finally has the most important part figured out.
Because she's going home. She's going back for him.
And yeah they haven't spoken in 6 months, but it's always gonna be there. Lucas&Peyton. True Love Always.
It's taken a long time to realize that, but it's the only thing she knows for sure. Hopefully he still knows it too.
ll I Miss You Love,
I Miss You... ll
He's stuck in New York for the night-He really does hate this town.
His meetings ran later then expected and then his editor said they should go out and celebrate that his novel was nearly finished and even though he didn't want to he knew it was important to go. (He fakes being ok, remember?)
So they go to this little bar down the street from the publisher's building and they drink to the success of his book. But after that first drink, David gets a call and apparently there is some emergency back at the office with another author so he says his apologies and then it's just Lucas sitting in some bar he's never been to, in a town he despises, with only alcohol to keep him company. Bad combination.
He has a few more drinks and he keeps to himself, but then someone-someone he really wants to punch-starts a jukebox that he didn't even realize was there and pick's a song that his him flashing back to a concert at Fox Theatre and even further back to that day by the river when he first spoke to her.
That's Me Inside Your Head
As much as he wants to punch that guy for making him remember, Lucas wishes someone would punch him because he's responsible for the fact that he's not with that girl anymore.
He doesn't want to hear anymore or think or feel, so he pays the bill and walks out the door and is still so upset that he doesn't watch where he's going and he bumps right into someone.
"Oh, I'm sorry.." He says not looking up to see who he hit.
"Well, well…Lucas Scott." The raspy voice says.
And Lucas knows that voice. He remembers that voice, he doesn't have to look up to know who it is.
ll I know the distance is a factor ll
She decides to splurge and take a plane (she's counting her pennies she's unemployed after all) because there's no way she can take having to drive all the way to Tree Hill. She's never really realized just how far they are from each other-three thousand miles-and she's only glad she realizes it now as she's about to go home then two years ago when she first left.
She doesn't tell anyone she's coming, because honestly she's not sure what she's gonna do when she gets there.
She's got no job or real career skills. She's hasn't told her Dad about her plans, but she knows he won't have a problem if she stays at home for a while. But eventually she'll have to find something more permanent.
All she knows is one thing for sure. She's gonna do everything she can to get back the one person-the one reason-she's going home for. Lucas.
She's not sure how, but she knows why. And that reason is enough that she's doing this in the first place. It's enough that she'll figure out the rest, hopefully with him by her side.
ll But I stretch as often as I can.. ll
New York isn't as bad anymore. Not when you've got someone there. And Lucas does, so that makes his trips just a little easier.
In the past few weeks, he's realized a couple things.
First, he was right. Brooke Davis is changing the world, and she doesn't even know it. Everyone might see her as this fashionista who at twenty has build a milti-million dollar label, but she's a lot more then that. She's still the sweet, kind, caring girl he's always knew she was.
Since their first accidental meeting that night outside the bar, they've talked more to each other then in the last two years she's been gone. And he realizes he missed it, he missed her.
Every time he's had to come back to this city, they always make time to see each other. Whether it be for a quick cup of coffee or a nice dinner at some fancy restaurant she's dragging him too. They catch each other up on what's been going on in their lives, with her empire and the fact that her mother has stepped in to help, and with his novel and school and basketball.
She tears up when she see's a picture of Jamie, and promises that she'll call Haley and Nathan soon. Lucas isn't surprised when she does the very next day.
Apparently-after meeting Victoria, he's not too surprised-Brooke's not to happy with what her life's become. She says she misses home and misses everyone and has been missing it for a while.
Lucas tells her then maybe she doesn't belong in New York, maybe she should come home, and when she says that just maybe he's right-he wishes it would have been this easy with another girl he tried to convince to come home.
ll My goal is to reach your hands any day now... ll
While she's waiting for the plane to land, she knows that she made the right decision by flying because though the flight took only a few hours, it was nearly impossible to sit through it knowing that she was here and he was there, and she couldn't wait for them to get to be at the same place-together-home.
Because the way she sees it, its been longer then six months, its been two years since she left that summer after high school, and she doesn't want to have to wait anymore then that.
When the plane finally does land, she wishes she would've let someone know she was coming because it is until she's at baggage claim that she realizes there's no one there to pick her up.
So she wastes more time waiting at the taxi station until one pulls up to her, and then she's mumbling her address to the guy and rushing to throw her bags in the back seat.
When she gets to her Dad's place and leaves her things inside, she goes to the garage with her keys in hand, rushing to start up that old car of hers. And sitting in the drivers seat takes her back. Back to when it was him and her and road trips to concerts they never got to see and drives on river road just because they could. Sitting in that car reminds her (she doesn't think she needs anymore reminders) that there's just no way getting around it.
She's gonna love Lucas Scott forever.
And remembering that has her driving as fast as she can (within speed limits of course) towards his house.
When she drives up and gets to the door-the front one, because she's too nervous to knock on his side door, I mean he could answer then they would be standing in his room, and that brings back a memory when she did something very similar to this and that really didn't go how she had planned it, so-but after a few knocks she assumes that he's not home.
So she gets back in her car and drives to his Mom's café, because its very likely that he's there helping his Mom with the lunch rush like he used to do. And that's gotta make Peyton smile. Because that's just the kind of guy, her guy is. Of course he would be there helping his mother.
ll Please don't blame me for trying,
to fix this one last time ll
But then she drives up and there is paper covering the window and a 'closed' sign taped to the front door, and all this has her panicking a bit. A lot actually. He's not at his house and his mom's café is apparently closed, like permanently. Where the hell is everybody?
She tries to stop her mind from wandering about all the possible what if's, but really they haven't spoken in 6 months! Who knows what could have happened since then.
Before she has a complete breakdown right there on the street, she stops herself and thinks of all the places he still might be here in Tree Hill. He could be at Nathan and Haley's or the gym or that book store down the street, or…
She almost has to laugh at herself for being so dramatic, because she's just remembered the one place he's probably at, is the last place she's even thought of.
The River Court.
When she does finally get to that old court, that's when she thinks her worrying is justified. He's not here.
She still parks her car and walks out, hoping that he'll show eventually. Because he has too, she's here and he has to be too.
So she gets out and she sits on those benches just like she used to do when they were together, or even when they weren't. When she would sit for hours drawing or reading or just watching him as he played. She sits and waits, and as the sun begins to go down, she sort of feels like her hope is too.
When the sun's finally all the way gone from the sky and the chill of the evening starts to become to cold for comfort, she thinks maybe it's time to call it day. So she gets up, but before she goes she walks over and looks down to see her name, and his, and all of their friends, still on the asphalt-faded and worn and almost gone-but its still there.
Maybe that's a sign. She's not sure what it's telling her, but she thinks it means something that after years of sun and the constant playing that happens here, all of their names are still here.
And in that moment, that's when she hears the dribbling of a basketball come from behind her and she freezes. Finally. Just when she was ready to give up again, he's here to remind her not to.
The dribbling stops and she half expects it, he's probably just as surprise as she is that she's actually come back.
She turns around, but its not him.
"Sawyer? Oh my god.. It is you!" Nathan says as he forgets all about his game and drops his ball to the grass and all but knocks her down from the hug he wraps her in.
"Nathan Scott." She says in a hushed tone, hugging him back just as tight as he is her.
This may not be the Scott she was looking for, but its good to see him all the same. Seeing him makes her smile. A smile that she hasn't worn in more then six months, more like two years. Since the last time she was home, around the people she loved and cared about and who loved and cared about her.
"Wait till Haley sees you, she's gonna flip." He laughs as he loosens his grip.
"Well I can't wait to see her too, and baby James, well he's not much of a baby anymore is he?" She says regrettably. She might be home now, but she knows she's missed a lot and that's something she can't take back.
"No, but you should see him he's like the coolest kid ever, well you know it was inevitable that my kid would be cool…" He smirks as she laughs.
"Nathan Scott always so modest." She says sarcastically and with a shake of her head. She didn't realized how much she's missed him, but she did. A lot. His forthright comments and sarcasm and his ability to always put a smile on her face, no matter what the circumstances.
"Come on Sawyer I know you missed me, admit it." He says as they walk over to the benches to sit.
"I don't know what I did without you for so long Nate.." She says as she nudges his shoulder.
"Right, but you know I have every right to be pissed with you." He says seriously.
"Excuse Me?" She says taken back by his sudden change in demeanor.
"You and my jackass of a brother decide to break up, which by the way I think is so stupid and I told him so... But either way you break up with him, and none of us have heard from you since. That's a shitty thing to do, you know?" He says hurt by the fact that not only had Lucas lost her, but he sort of made everyone lose her too.
"Nate… I'm sorry ok, but everything got so hard and complicated, I just didn't handle it well..." When she stopped calling she did it because it hurt too much to talk to anyone who had been around her when she was with him, she never really thought she was hurting anyone else too.
"Yeah, well he didn't really handle it either. Things got pretty dark for a while and I was really considering how the hell me and Haley could come up with a way to get you two back together.." He says it laughing, but she knows it's true.
"Wow, Nathan Scott, master manipulator."
"Well, you two didn't give me much of choice.."
"Right. Well I'm here now, does that count for anything?" She says smiling at him.
"Yeah, Sawyer. It counts for everything." He says as he wraps his arm around her shoulder.
That right there, that's the reason why he considers her one of his best friends. Because she's always willing to admit when she's made a mistake, but more then that she's always willing to fix it. And he thinks her coming home is the best way.
"Nate, where is he?" She finally asks.
"Who?" He says laughing as she looks over at him, clearly annoyed that he's joking around with her.
"Nathan Scott.." She says it in a way that has him flashing back to their freshmen year when they were together and she would scowled at him whenever he pissed her off.
"He's in New York."
"New York?" She knows it's been 6 months, but how the hell did he end up all the way in New York?
"Yeah, he spends most of his free time up there finishing up the revisions of his novel." Nathan doesn't fail to notice the flash of disappointment that crosses over his friend's face.
"Oh.."
"I talked to him last night, we didn't talk for long he was at dinner with Brooke and-"
"Brooke?" She doesn't let him finish explaining before she's cutting him off with another question.
Brooke? As in Brooke Davis? Her best friend-or the girl who used to be her best friend, because they haven't spoken since she left Peyton in L.A. for New York-that Brooke?
Then she thinks about it, and of course he's with Brooke. Didn't it always end up that way? Whenever things happened between them and things got tough and complicated there was always Brooke there, getting in between them.
"Yeah, Brooke…. Peyton-" Nathan starts out, but he gets interrupted again.
"Nate I gotta go.." She says standing quickly and walking back to her car.
She can't believe this. Well she can because its happened before, so really she should have expected it. Yes, it's been six months-but in the last six months of being without him, she finally understood that she couldn't be without him, that it would always be him and her.
Well, apparently he didn't feel the same way. Because he's in New York with Brooke.
"Peyton! Wait, hold on. Peyton!" Nathan yelled at her as she keeps walking, throwing her arm up to wave him off.
He sees her drive off and he can only shake his head.
Damn her and her stubbornness he thinks. She never did let him get in a word when they would argue back in high school. Even when he was right. This time, when she cut him off before he got the chance to explain and make her understand, it's no different.
ll I have a hard time as it is.. ll
There's another thing Lucas has figured out since running into Brooke.
And its that Brooke Davis might be the only person who knows Peyton just as well as he does.
And that helps, a lot. Because when he explains what happened (he was shock to find out the two best friends haven't spoken in so long) she's the only person who tells him not to give up.
She's the only one who believes, just as much as him, that no matter the time or distance or space, there will always be a connection between the two blondes. Even when neither are willing to admit it.
She tells him that her and Peyton might have lost touch-something she feels really bad about-but she still considers her, her best friend.
She says their girl might of closed herself off but that doesn't mean she doesn't love him.
The way she explains it, "That girl has loved you when you were the nerdy guy who read under the tree at lunch and she still loves you now as your about to publish your own book.'
Well when Brooke puts it that way, he really thinks she might be right.
The night before at dinner-she's always dragging him to places she knows he hates-somehow, like always, the subject turned to that blonde girl in L.A. and how much Brooke thinks he's an idiot for not calling her.
"So have you talked to her?" She asks as the waiter brings over another bottle of wine. Now Lucas gets why she loves these places, because everyone doesn't want to disappoint Brooke Davis, fashion designer, and she pretty much gets everything she wants.
"Have you?" Lucas asks right back.
They've talked about that too. Why Brooke hasn't keep in touch with Peyton. The way Brooke explained it, she wasn't much of a friend to her-especially Senior year-and maybe it was for the best that the two drifted apart like they did.
Lucas doesn't really buy that explanation though. He thinks she is just as scared as he is that maybe Peyton doesn't want them in her life anymore.
"Hey, I'm not the one who considers her the love of my life, so don't start with me…" She says waving him off.
"Besides what are you waiting for Broody? It's been months. You love her. And I don't have to talk to her to know that she loves you." She says with certainty.
"Yeah but maybe it's not that easy Brooke. I mean we said things, and we let everything come between us. It's not that easy." He says shaking his head.
"No its not easy, but its not impossible either. Luke, come on. You've written two whole books about how much you love her!" She says as he looks at her questioningly.
"Haley told me. And we both think and Nathan does too-that the only thing getting in your way is you.." Brooke says it and means it.
Because she might of come between the two blondes back in high school, but she knows now that was a mistake. Because it's Lucas and Peyton.
It was always Lucas and Peyton.
And its really starting to piss her off that they're the only two who don't realize that.
ll Because I miss you love
I miss you love ll
She doesn't know what she's gonna do. She's got no job or apartment or reason to be here. And as she drives around streets and roads she's driven through all her life, things don't get any clearer. This doesn't feel like home anymore-mostly because he's not here-and she's got no one and nothing (that's not true, there's Nathan and Haley, but that's not what she means) telling her to stay.
As she keeps driving aimlessly and with no purpose other to forget-everything, she keeps thinking about the same thing over and over again. What has been her life long mantra.
People Always Leave.
She left.
But... she came back.
Maybe just a little too late though.
When she finally drives to her Dad's place, she has to let out a bitter laugh. All her things have arrived, waiting to be unpacked and sorted or looked through or something… But seriously, what the hell was she thinking?
In the course of a week she lost her job, admitted to herself that she was in love with a boy that not but six months ago she thought didn't love her enough to understand, and then just decided to pack up everything she owned and move home to be with him.
She had expected him to be waiting for her. She thought he would tell her that they had made a mistake and that their love meant so much and that he needed her.
Of course in hindsight she knows it all sounds completely crazy-down right ridiculous actually-but it was supposed to be Him and Her. It was always supposed to be there.
Well she's here now, but he's there. In New York. With Brooke.
That night as she tries with no luck to fall asleep she looks at her closet door. It's still there (he carved it so it would always be there).
Lucas&Peyton. True Love Always.
But looking at that has her remembering what used to be on that door. When it was her name on one side and Brooke's on the other. More specifically, the fact that Lucas' name was not under hers, but Brooke's.
ll I Miss You Love,
I miss You... ll
He gets back from New York and he starts to think about what Brooke told him. And yes its not easy and he's-they've-made a lot of mistakes but maybe she's right. Nothing is stopping him from picking up the phone.
Because even though he used to think that L.A. and music and her career was more important to her then him, he knows now that that's not true. That just because she had a dream, it didn't mean that she stopped loving him, and it didn't mean he stopped loving her.
And she might still be there and he's still here, but loving each other should be all that matters, right?
He finally gets up the courage to call, because it is that simple and they can work it out and because it's always gonna be there. Him and Her.
When he calls he finds out her number has been disconnected.
He doesn't know what to think. It's been six months, who knows what's happened since the last time they talked.
She could've moved.
She could've been transferred.
She could have met someone else.
All Lucas knows now is that he's still here, but now he doesn't know where she is, and that's the scary thought he's ever had.
He gets really mad at that fact and goes out and buys a bottle and all but locks himself up in his house. He's done with pretending that he's ok and fine and happy.
And before he falls asleep that night he text's Brooke.
You Were Wrong.
ll Don't act like you don't know me
It's still me, I never changed... ll
She knows that technically she doesn't have to be-Lucas is in New York-but she's been in hiding.
She still doesn't know where Karen is or when Luke will be back or anything else, because she's been ignoring Haley's calls and she didn't answer the door the two times Nathan's stopped by.
Cause she doesn't know what she's gonna do and she thinks if she talks to anyone it will only make her more confused.
Her plan of hiding out works for a few days, then it doesn't. She had just showered and gotten dressed when she walked out of her bathroom to find Nathan sitting on her bed.
"What the hell?" She jumps in surprise.
"How the hell did you get in here? Don't you think breaking into a girl's house who once had a stalker was a bad idea?" She yells as she comes at him and punches him in the arm.
"Ow! Hey, I didn't break in, I saw your neighbor outside, he remembered me when we used to date, he let me in." He says as he rubs his arm.
He forgot that her brother taught her how to fight. Maybe he taught her too much, that punch is definitely gonna leave a mark.
"Well than he's getting yelled out too." She says as she walks around her room, ignoring that Nathan is there.
"Well before you go all Mike Tyson on him too, we need to talk. Or I need to talk and you need to listen." He tells her. When she looks at him and doesn't say a word back, he knows he's got her attention.
"Lucas is in New York."
"Yeah I got that part.." She bites back.
"Well if you would have let me finished and not been 'don't talk to me because I'm badass Peyton Sawyer,' He says as she scowled as him.
"You would have heard me say that he bumped into Brooke a few weeks back and they've been catching up with each other ever since. As Friends." He says, emphasizing the friends part, as he looks over and see's Peyton face change.
"Oh…" All this time she thought (could you blame her?) but it wasn't really that after all. Oh, is about the only thing she can say.
"Yeah, so if you could stop doing that brooding thing you always do when your mad, we could talk about what's really going on Sawyer.."
"And what's that?" She says as she feels the tears beginning to form.
"You love my brother. And he loves you. But your both idiots because you messed it up and now you think you can't fix it, when you really can." He says honestly, as she finally sits down next to him.
When Nathan puts it's that way, it does sound like they're being stubborn idiots.
"You think he still love me?" She asks as a tear falls. She has to ask, because really considering how things ended and how easily it was for her to jump to conclusions, it feels like maybe it is to hard and it won't work out, and they don't love each other as much as they thought they did.
"Peyton, of course he does.." He says as he pulls her into a hug.
"He's probably gonna kick my ass, but he's not leaving me much of a choice so-" He begins as she wipes away another tear.
"Brooke called Haley and Haley told me, and so I had to come here, because you've been ignoring her calls and everyone's getting confused and all any of us want is for you two to get it together already." He says winded by the explanation but with a smile on his face.
And she has to smile at that, because that's all she wants too.
"Anyways…Apparently Brooke finally convinced him to call you, and when he did, your phone was disconnected-which is because you're here, but no one knew that but me and Haley. So Luke like freaked, and is doing what you've been doing…hiding out." Nathan says as he shakes his head. These two are so much a like it's scary.
"Wait-he's here?" She asks.
"Luke? Yeah he's been home for the past few days."
"Oh.." Is her only response.
"You know Sawyer I read Luke's book, and you and him have got to stop using that word when someone tells you something major." He laughs out.
"Dude, shut up! Don't you have like a wife and son to get home to or something?" She says as they stand.
"A hot wife and a awesome son? Yes, I do." He smirks as she laughs. "So do me and everyone else a favor, Go See Him!" He shouts as he starts to walk down the stairs.
"And call Brooke! She thinks you don't want to be her friend or something.." He yells out before she hears the door close behind him.
Wow. She really has been an idiot. Because Lucas is here, and he loves her (Nathan might of said it, but she thinks the only way she'll know for sure is if she talks to Lucas himself).
And Brooke thinks she's mad at her? Well, ok she was freaking out the past few days when she thought the worse, but before that there was no way she was ever mad at her best friend. Cause yeah they might not have talked in a while, but they're always gonna be best friends.
It seems Peyton's got a lot to fix.
ll I'll be here when you come back ll
He spends two days at home, alone-well, with his bottle but he finished that yesterday-before he checks his phone and sees he has 12 missed calls.
Its sounds like a lot, but then he checks them and 4 are from Haley, 3 are from Brooke, 3 are from Nathan, and 2 from his Mom. He knew he didn't talk to that many people. He's thinking that Brooke probably panicked when he didn't answer and called Haley, who made Nathan call too, and when he still didn't answer, she called his mom too.
Well that's just great. He's got everyone freaking out, because he made a dumb choice to call someone who obviously doesn't want to know him anymore (for whatever reason, she changed her number and didn't bother to call him and given him the new one) and all he wanted to do it just live with the misery for a while.
He sends out a text to all four of them, so he doesn't have anymore worried calls.
Don't worry about me. I'm fine. -Lucas
When he doesn't get any calls back he's hoping they believe him. But then he hears a knock at the door, and he ready's to start the pretending again.
That he's ok and fine and happy. That he just needed a few days' to himself and it's no big deal. And that empty bottle on his table was already halfway gone when he started to drink it.
He's ready to start faking it again.
But then he opens the door and its not Haley, or Nathan.
It's her.
"Hey" Is as he says. Its been six months and that's all he gets out. Mostly because he thinks saying I love You and I missed You, is just a little too soon.
"My phone doesn't work because I moved." She says it because it's the first thing she thinks.
"Ok.." He says confused.
"I moved, recently actually and I didn't get the chance to tell anyone and-" She rambles on.
She doesn't finish explaining before he's got her wrapped up in one of the tightest hugs she's ever had.
"Hi" He whispers into her hair as he holds her.
"Hi" She says holding on just as tight as he is.
"So you moved?" He asks finally letting go enough to see her face as he asks.
"Yeah, I'm-I moved. I moved home, I'm back." She smiles, because he's smiling, and because this is what she thought what it would be like. Coming home and seeing him and feeling like she never should have left. Like this is it. Him and Her
She's home? As in, she's back for good? That's all he's wanted to hear for the last two years, and he can't believe it. She promised she would love him forever and she meant it.
Well he always meant it too.
"Peyton, I'm so sorry…I-" He starts to apologize then it's her cutting him off.
He has so much he wants to tell her, but before he can he has to say how sorry he is. For saying things he didn't really mean, and ending things the way they did. And for not saving her so she could save him back. Basically for all that's happened in the last six months.
"I missed you so much." She says as she hugs him again. She loves that he thinks he has to say sorry, but really they both do, and they've got to say a lot of other things to. But right now, she doesn't care about any of that.
"I missed you too…" He says as he pulls her inside.
ll Because I miss you love,
I miss you love... ll
It's been a two days since she's seen him. They haven't spoken since that day at his place, not so much as phone call.
They obviously both know how the other feels, and they can both guess what the other wants. There was a lot of I can't believe your here and I missed You, but they really didn't talk much before Haley, Nathan, and Brooke (a surprise that everyone was happy about) showed up, apparently not buying the text Luke had sent them. When they see Peyton there with him, it turned into a celebration, a reunion Brooke had said.
But it didn't matter to Lucas or Peyton because when it comes down to it, it's always gonna be there. Him and Her.
But it's been two days and neither have them has acted on it.
Because what if they mess it up? And what if their love isn't enough? And what if they cant get back what they had?
Nathan tells Lucas that he's being stupid and is just acting out of fear, and he needs to get his shit together and just man up already.
Brooke (Peyton and her had a really long talk and their friendship is better then ever, so much that Brooke is thinking its time to come home too) and Haley tell Peyton the same thing just with less cursing.
But the truth is, their right. She's scared. She's scared that just maybe, they won't mess it up, and their love is enough, and they can get what they once had or maybe they can have something even better.
She's scared that Someday is finally here.
But, is she ready? Are they? Is it really that simple?
She sitting at home (no job, remember?) and can't take the silence anymore and so she decides she needs a walk.
She's got to clear her mind, and pull out of this funk she's in-she doesn't got a job, but her and Haley have been talking and she thinks it would be really cool if she could start her own label here in Tree Hill. She thinks she's got to push away everything that has her so unsure and confused. (It always comes back to his words doesn't it?)
When she starts to walk she doesn't really focus on the actual walking part, and somehow she ends up at the river court. She's not so sure she would consider that a sign or just absentmindedness, but whatever the case may be, she goes to sit on those old benches just like she always did.
Eventually she tells herself that its getting too cold and too quiet (or really because sitting that has her thinking a lot more then she was at home) and that its time to head back home. But before she goes, she stops just like the first time she step on to this court since she's been back and she walks over to the side where all their names still are.
She thinks about that night, and the way they all were and the things they promised, and she wishes it was all that easy still. She wishes they could've kept their promises to each other and be who they thought they would be.
Or maybe they did and none of them realize it, and the tragic part is maybe it's too late to remember.
She's about to leave when she hears a basketball dribbling towards her from behind.
This time she doesn't hesitate like the last time. They've already said the most important things to each other (just short of I love You) and whatever he's about to tell her she's ready to hear. She thinks.
Nathan told him what happened that first night she was back. About how pissed she got when she thought he was with Brooke. And when he walked up to the court to shoot around (that's the only way he's been able to clear his head) he has to smile when he sees her there.
He thinks she was right with that theory of hers all those years ago.
People Always Leave.
But Sometimes they Come Back.
She's proved it.
And really its that simple, right?
Because when it comes down to it, it's always gonna be there. Him and Her.
"Hey" He says as he stops dribbling the ball and holds it to his hip.
"Hi…I was just-I'll leave you to it." She says as she looks toward the hoop. She should of known she would run into him here.
"No" He says just above a whisper.
"Stay?" He asks as he nods his head towards the benches for her to sit like she used to.
"Ok." She smiles as she goes to take her place.
"Good" He says with a laugh thinking about that last time he visited her in L.A., as he starts to dribble the ball again.
"Good?" She questions.
She knows it's not this easy. So much has happened and it's gonna take a lot for them to fix all their mistakes and choices , but doesn't it always come back to his words?
"Perfect." He finishes as he smiles over to her just before he takes the shot.
He knows it's not that easy, they have so much to work though and it might never be the same. But maybe that's a good thing because things are different now, they don't have what they did before.
Because finally, she's here and he's here. And he doesn't ever want that to change.
ll And I miss you love, I miss you love... ll
-Fin.
Song: Miss You Love, By: Maria Mena