Chapter 15.

So Edward's all saved and now. And I get it, its like one minute Bella is all Ilu, then shes all over Edward, but the thing is, he was sorta her first love, sure he has nothing on Alice, but I mean she cant switch off her feelings for him, she still cares about him. Even if he did leave her resulting in her zombie like state of living. Fear not, remember this - Bella realises who is better for her, it's just one of those situations, she's glad hes alive or undead alive :P

Don't worry, she didn't just like fall out of love with Alice cos Eddy boy waltzed back into the picture.

As for Alice, well damn the guilt has gotta be kinda intense right? I know its all angst ridden right now.

Things are sorta tense and confusing for both of them. Trust that in spite of it all, they know what they really want.

Il be updating again soon, i wrote another chapter directly after this, i just dont wanna publish two in a day :D so in about 12 hours, a new chapter will be up

Bella POV.

It felt good, to be back in my own bed. Even if i am alone. The memories of the Volturi, haunting me. Stopping me from sleeping for more than 20 minutes, without jaunting out of it. It wasn't just the way they looked, or the terrifying atmosphere of their underground layer, the way they spoke, their voices, the ruthless malice that they displayed. They seemed a breed apart from the Cullen's, like different creatures altogether.

Aro, the most haunting of them, the way he took delight in pain, Edward's pain. He said things, confusing things. I assume to aggravate Edward. It worked. They aggravated me also. Half the time we spent there, i was busy trying to work out what the hell he was talking about. He was cryptic almost, acting at the same time as though he were omniscient. Knowing more than us.... We got away alive, and that is all that matters, Edward, me and Alice.

We made it back. Knowing that the Volturi will be coming to visit doesn't exactly put me at ease either.

Things could be a lot worse. Had it not been for Alice.

Showing Aro that i would be turned, eventually, by her, in spite of Edwards protest. I needed to speak to her about that, about whether Aro had seen, us...together. If he'd noticed.

If Edward noticed.

I'm due to see Edward tomorrow, so if he did see, Alice and I, then I'd find out about it soon enough. Either way, we have Alice to thank for our lives. I should thank her face to face, and then discuss, what happens, what is going to happen, what this all means. I haven't spoken to her since we left Volterra, she was unusually distant the whole journey home, i 'spose she had to be, Edward can read her mind. What if he saw? In her mind, when they got home? Or even in the car. Oh my god, what am i going to do.

A bitterly cold wind blew into my room.

Getting up to close my window, i take a deep breath and return to my bed. Edward won't be coming tonight.

I have to clear my mind, I'll never get any sleep. Maybe i should open my window again. Edward's unpredictable. He could turn up; we've been apart for months. If i do open it, am i sure i even want it to be Edward coming through it? I'm glad to see him. I'm glad he isn't dead. But is he who i really want right now? I wouldn't mind seeing Edward. I think that i need to see Alice though.

Letting out a loud sigh, i lay flat on my back, turning my head toward the window and closing my eyes. Breathing steadily. This is relaxing...i wonder whether Alice is still watching me, looking out for me....it feels like she always is, ever since she told me she had searched for me every day...like she is always there, close to me.

Squinting a little, so i can see the moonlight flood in through my window, i feel like I'm being watched... I can sense it, its atmospheric almost, like a presence...

"Alice...?" I say aloud, hoping that it's her I'm feeling

No answer.

Jumping up from my bed, i look out of the window, nothing.

Letting out a loud sigh, my heart sinks. My bed doesn't look inviting at all, sinking down against the wall, in the corner of my bedroom; i bring my knees up and wrap my arms around them, burying my face. I wish she were here....

I can feel it again, the hole, my breath leaving my body, folding my arms around my torso, i take deep breaths, Not this again. This was supposed to be gone now. The hole was supposed to heal. I was supposed to catch my breath again, after months of struggling to breathe...i have to talk to her...like now, i can't take the anxiety

Releasing a small sob, tears start to roll down my face.

I know what to do.

Alice. I'm going to come to your house right now. I decided. Can you see me? This is me deciding to come and see you, unless you get here first, can you hear me? Please say you can. Please come to me, i need to talk to you. I can't breathe when you're not with me.

I have to mean it, let me get up and get dressed. I'll go get some clothes. I will go down there, if that's what it takes.