Disclaimer: I do not own twlight.
Welcome back readers. So, here is the second chapter as requested by a few readers. About 5 people reviewed, and i've decided that for the first time, i'm going to deicated a chapter to a few very awesome people.
A huge thank you goes out to the following amazing people: cheerleading847, ally leigh, Alice, TwilightHeart21 and laurazuleta18.
Enjoy!!
"What do you mean you're… leaving, Alex?" I questioned again, my voice breaking when the painful word broke though my lips, leaving.
His eyes refused to look at my face, to see the trails of water stained skin that his simple statement caused. He shook his head slightly. "It means what it has always meant."
Cold and emotionless, he spoke as if he was announcing the color of his shirt, normal without huge meaning. Another stab of pain shot though my chest leaving me to gasp for the air it knotted out of my lungs.
"Wh-…why?" I asked. The sound of my voice was not strange to me. Broken and pleading notes rang though my question. Common tones for me over the past couple of weeks; it seems they have been used too much.
"I have to Nina. I know there could not be a worse time for this, and I feel horrible that I am leaving right now, right when you need your best friend the most, but I have no choice." Alex looked into my face. I saw my own pain mirrored in his eyes as he looked me over.
Stepping closer he raised a hand to rub my arm. Drops of salty water continued to fall down over my crumpled face. Closing the gap between us I cried into his chest and he hugged me close, rubbing my back and whispering promises of keeping in touch.
I wasn't being purely selfish in this matter. He explained the situation before breaking the news, before breaking me.
Alex is – and forever will be - my best friend. We have always been there for each other, through everything, never turning our backs on each other. I knew I could count on him to keep the promise of communication, but that only eased a small part of my pain.
We met in grade four. He wanted to use my glue stick but I said no. Alex then offered two pink colored pencils and a piece of gum for the glue. Loving the color pink, I accepted. Everything grew from there.
Friendships go through those two big shoulder crying moments and his came in junior high. The hints swirled around his head but he never analyzed them. The entire student body had a clue, but he was in denial, I suppose.
I remember the day he finally came out. It was two in the morning and my phone buzzed beneath my pillow, successfully waking me. I opened my phone to hear him wail, "I like Matt!!"
I was tried and his statement could be interpreted in so many ways my brain was confused. Naturally I responded, "Okay?"
Alex explained what he meant, he was gay.
It never has bothered me, it never will. He was still the same old Alex and it shouldn't have bothered anyone else, but of course, it did. I was the one he called after school when those jackasses wrote nasty words on his stuff or threw things at him.
I promised to always be there, through the glares and the taunting. I promised to kick anyone's ass that shouted one wrong name or gave him a dirty look. And I did. I was suspended five times in eighth grade for fighting and three times in grade nine.
His reason for leaving was all tied to that. His parents weren't aware of his ex-boyfriends and he intended for it to remain like that until he had a handle on everything. His plan failed, epically.
Jordan, his latest ex, ran into Alex's parents. They talked; nothing wrong there until Jordan asked how Alex was doing with the break up. His parents were confused, saying they never knew Alex had a girlfriend. Jordan laughed, seeing as Alex never did have a girlfriend, and causally informed his parents that he had just recently broken up with Alex.
To say the least, his parents were pissed. Their course of action to 'cleanse', not my choice of words, their son, was military school. On the other side of the country.
We stood huddled together for a long time. My fist clutching parts of his sweater as I cried harder, pulling him closer, wishing I never had to let go, never had to say goodbye. He stroked my back and kissed my hair, a few single tears falling onto my shirt.
"When do you leave?" I asked in small muffled voice, breaking the silence that hung between us.
"Two days." He whispered.
"And I came for the promise of fun." I taunted weakly.
"I know, honey. I'm so sorry. But I will always love you, through it all you stood next to me and I only wish I could repay the favor." He hugged me tighter and kissed my head again.
I cried harder. Wishing on every shooting star and praying to every known god, asking to please let him stay. Please, don't take away my only ray of light, only source of hope, only person who cares.
I can't say goodbye. Not to Alex. And I never will.
Pale light shone on my bare legs, raising goose bumps. I pretended not to notice the cold breeze of autumn air that swept through my room on occasion. I wanted nothing more then to stay in the exact position I settled into three hours ago.
The red digitally produced numbers relayed the message it was six in morning. A monotone voice was sure to attempt to rouse me from my non-existent slumber soon. My mother repeated that same action every school day at six fifteen, trying to play the role of a caring parental figure.
School was the last thing I wanted to waste my time on today. In fact, it was the worst idea possible.
There was a reason I had taped sheets over my walls and made sure most sources of light were hidden. I was avoiding any reminder of him that wandered along, any single thing that compelled me to race to his small house and beg on my knees for him to stay.
He asked me to refrain from doing so. Not to go after him. No matter how much it hurt because in the end it would only make it worse. I suppose he's right. It might make things worse but at least I would have tried, instead of crying into my worn blanket and cursing his parents, myself and society for not having the heart to accept everyone even when they are different.
Being a teenager, to adults, means that I am bound to be overdramatic about small things. I'd love to say I'm making this into something much bigger than it is, but honest to god I'm not.
Think about it for a second. If one day your brother, someone you loved with your whole heart and trusted with your life no matter what, suddenly refused to talk to you, denied all your concern and shut you out of their life except for a few frustrated words. If on the same day your parents didn't take notice to you asking for help, didn't pay attention to your pleas and basically forgot your existence had some value.
For the fucking cherry on top of the screwed up cake, my best friend, the one I run to every time I feel like exploding from frustration, or I feel as if I am so unimportant I could disappear and no one would notice, is leaving. Going across the country.
Dramatic? Hell yeah. But those are the facts my friends.
"Coming!" I hollered towards the shut door, the source of the annoying tapping noise. I raced down the stairs, hoping to get whoever insisted on being let in gone before I had to engage in some form of friendly interaction.
I yanked the front door open with a huff. On the other side stood a man, he looked familiar but my fuzzy mind had no way of connecting that gorgeous face to one from my past.
Whoever this guy was, he just woke me up, and I was not very cheery.
"Can I help you?" I asked with a slight hint of acid in my voice.
"I'm looking for Patrick, is he available?" He spoke with grace, the words floating from his mouth with perfect pronunciation.
I shook my head. "Nope, he is not." I mumbled. I didn't bother looking at the stranger after the first glance, my eyes glued to the pavement beneath my bare feet.
His deep, heavy sigh seemed to carry a string of emotion. "Well, I apologize for bothering you then." Heavy foot steps followed his statement.
My mind was screaming for me to stop him, ask him who he was and why he came. The way he spoke, the sound of the hidden emotion in his voice reflected what I had been feeling. How could someone else understand what I was feeling?
I wanted to know what tie he had to do with Patrick. Taking a deep breath I lifted my eyes to see him climbing into a car. "Wait!" I called out to him.
He stopped reaching to close his door and turned to face me. I opened my mouth but closed it again when words failed me. I shook my head and turned to go back into my house.
I am being stupid; wishing that I belonged in some Disney movie and that when everyone left me some savior would come along just when the day seemed darkest. He would be understanding and console me until I felt safe. But, that stuff just doesn't happen.
Tires screeched down the road as the car raced away. I leaned against the closed door for support, letting a few stray tears fall.
I really am alone.
Left to wallow in my own darkness.
No light to guide me back.
Now, TwilightHeart21 - mentioned at the top already- has proven once again how mind blowing she is as a beta - for this story, a writer - i've been addicting to her writting for a long time, I adore all her work - and as a friend. Another huge thanks goes out to her, i owe you sweetie.
You know the drill, review to let me know if you wanna kept reading. Trust me, Nina's ride is far from over.
Thanks for reading and please review!
Swimming cutie xoxo